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   Seattle woman attempts to marry 107 year old building. Says despite their differences, the marriage will have a solid foundation

28 Jan 2012 08:46 PM   |   5147 clicks   |   Komo
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JasonOfOrillia     
We were told this would happen if gay marriage became legal.

THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT SHEEPLE!

28 Jan 2012 08:48 PM
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tankjr     
JasonOfOrillia: We were told this would happen if gay marriage became legal.

THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT SHEEPLE!


done in one

28 Jan 2012 08:49 PM
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Tornado of Zoo Animals     
JasonOfOrillia: We were told this would happen if gay marriage became legal.

THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT SHEEPLE!


Leaving satisfied...

28 Jan 2012 08:50 PM
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butt-nuggets     
maybe she should just marry a dildo

28 Jan 2012 08:50 PM
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AbbeySomeone    [TotalFark]  
I may attend.

28 Jan 2012 08:51 PM
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GreenSun     
The building can't say NO.

28 Jan 2012 08:52 PM
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Herb Utsmelz    [TotalFark]  
She does realize it's been over 100 years since her hubby-to-be had an erection, right?

28 Jan 2012 08:53 PM
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shanrick    [TotalFark]  
img806.imageshack.us

28 Jan 2012 08:53 PM
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Pants full of macaroni!!    [TotalFark]  
img.photobucket.com

28 Jan 2012 08:53 PM
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gweilo8888     
Subby: "Seattle woman attempts to marry 107 year old building. Says despite their differences, the marriage will have a solid foundation is an attention whore"

FTFY

28 Jan 2012 08:55 PM
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1.21jigawatts     
Someone call Eric Cartman.

28 Jan 2012 08:55 PM
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Aar1012    [TotalFark]  
FTA - "'If corporations can have the rights as people, so can buildings' said Aivaz, referencing a Supreme Court decision on political advertising."

i3.photobucket.com

STARE DECISIS DOES NOT WORK THAT WAY!

/GOOD NIGHT!

28 Jan 2012 08:57 PM
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Phoenix87ta     
Herb Utsmelz: She does realize it's been over 100 years since her hubby-to-be had an erection, right?

Well played, well played indeed.

/I snrked.

28 Jan 2012 08:58 PM
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lack of warmth     
Now we move on to people and aliens can marry, living and non-living can marry and one day we may even allow robots and people marry.

/the mormons would be interested in marrying dead people, being they believe in celestial marriage

28 Jan 2012 08:59 PM
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Whistler36    [TotalFark]  
Is it built like a brick house? Is she? Is anyone?

28 Jan 2012 09:03 PM
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butt-nuggets     
or maybe "she's a brick ... house"

chick a dow dow

28 Jan 2012 09:04 PM
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snowjack    [TotalFark]  
In spite of Thursday events, Aivaz remained spirited about her planned wedding. She described the event as a community potluck, and asked attendees to "BRING FOOOOOOOOD~."

img337.imageshack.us

LULZ

28 Jan 2012 09:06 PM
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Gyrfalcon     
But does the BUILDING want to marry her, is the next question. If the building can knowingly and voluntarily consent, then I have no problem with this.

28 Jan 2012 09:07 PM
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I Have The Touch of a Shocked Monkey    [TotalFark]  
HOTY candidate in the pun section.

28 Jan 2012 09:10 PM
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zvoidx     
I'd like to hear the husband's side of the story.
/he must be floored

28 Jan 2012 09:13 PM
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suthrnrunt     
so..... if she marries the building and uses a dildo, is she cheating on the building?

28 Jan 2012 09:13 PM
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DreamSnipers     
That woman doesn't know my name, my address, or even of my existence. I like that a lot.

28 Jan 2012 09:14 PM
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Oldiron_79     
So when does the turtle farking start?

28 Jan 2012 09:16 PM
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Amishrabbit     
Proto-robosexual?

28 Jan 2012 09:16 PM
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Hokum     
suthrnrunt: so..... if she marries the building and uses a dildo, is she cheating on the building?

So if I enter that building and rub one out, would the building be cheating on her? If so i have a marriage to ruin.

28 Jan 2012 09:17 PM
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suthrnrunt     
Hokum: suthrnrunt: so..... if she marries the building and uses a dildo, is she cheating on the building?

So if I enter that building and rub one out, would the building be cheating on her? If so i have a marriage to ruin.


I think that would be raping the building :)

28 Jan 2012 09:18 PM
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Hokum     
suthrnrunt: Hokum: suthrnrunt: so..... if she marries the building and uses a dildo, is she cheating on the building?

So if I enter that building and rub one out, would the building be cheating on her? If so i have a marriage to ruin.

I think that would be raping the building :)


Hey it was asking for it... well it didn't say no... and it was erect at the time.

28 Jan 2012 09:20 PM
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skinink     
She was previously married to an elevator. That marriage didn't last because it had too many ups and downs.

28 Jan 2012 09:20 PM
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GungFu     
Ugly Fat White Women Atttention Whore Problems.

28 Jan 2012 09:22 PM
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New Farkin User Name     
"If corporations can have the rights as people, so can buildings,"

What she said is either completely insane, or THE MOST SENSE ANYBODY HAS EVER MADE!!!

This decision makes more sense than the Supreme Court case.

/Next is she going to marry the company Trojan?

28 Jan 2012 09:23 PM
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suthrnrunt     
Hokum: suthrnrunt: Hokum: suthrnrunt: so..... if she marries the building and uses a dildo, is she cheating on the building?

So if I enter that building and rub one out, would the building be cheating on her? If so i have a marriage to ruin.

I think that would be raping the building :)

Hey it was asking for it... well it didn't say no... and it was erect at the time.


I think they might not go for that cause last time i checked you couldn't rub one out on an invalid no matter how much dirty adult diapers turn you on.

28 Jan 2012 09:26 PM
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Hagenhatesyouall     
GreenSun: The building can't say NO.

Who are you to say who she can and can't marry?

Arranged marriages have taken place for thousands of years. Consent is immaterial.

28 Jan 2012 09:26 PM
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UsikFark     
butt-nuggets: maybe she should just marry a dildo

That would be a shaky marriage.

And same for the building, if Seattle gets a big one.

/giggidy.

28 Jan 2012 09:26 PM
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suthrnrunt     
Hagenhatesyouall: GreenSun: The building can't say NO.

Who are you to say who she can and can't marry?

Arranged marriages have taken place for thousands of years. Consent is immaterial.


i think you are missing a key point in your own argument. Arranged marriages have two parties involved, so there is someone speaking for both members of the marriage. Where is the 2nd party that speaks for the building?

to dumb it down for you, if the owner of the building doesn't consent to the fat one marrying their building, she can not marry the building.

28 Jan 2012 09:29 PM
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trillium13     
This one married the Berlin Wall, and wrote about it.

Eija-Riitta Berliner-Mauer-A Berlin Wall Love Story (new window)

28 Jan 2012 09:29 PM
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lisa0012     
There's another woman who goes on talk shows talking about how she's in love with the Eiffel Tower and the Berlin Wall. This one's an amateur. Not impressed.

28 Jan 2012 09:30 PM
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Eponymous     
Maybe a building is the only thing that would put up with her.....

She does seem like the type that when growing up had to have a pork chop tied around her neck so the dog would play with her.

28 Jan 2012 09:31 PM
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four95     
<b><a href="http://www.fark.com/comments/690 8524/74620973#c74620973" target="_blank">gweilo8888</a>:</b> <i><b>Subby:</b> "Seattle woman <strike>attempts to marry 107 year old building. Says despite their differences, the marriage will have a solid foundation</strike> is <strike><b>an attention whore</b></strike> <b>bat-shiat crazy</b>."</i>

FTFY

28 Jan 2012 09:35 PM
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four95     
Let's try that again...

gweilo8888: Subby: "Seattle woman attempts to marry 107 year old building. Says despite their differences, the marriage will have a solid foundation is an attention whore bat-shiat crazy"

28 Jan 2012 09:36 PM
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Hagenhatesyouall     
suthrnrunt: Hagenhatesyouall: GreenSun: The building can't say NO.

Who are you to say who she can and can't marry?

Arranged marriages have taken place for thousands of years. Consent is immaterial.

i think you are missing a key point in your own argument. Arranged marriages have two parties involved, so there is someone speaking for both members of the marriage. Where is the 2nd party that speaks for the building?

to dumb it down for you, if the owner of the building doesn't consent to the fat one marrying their building, she can not marry the building.


And if consent IS granted by said owner?

Well, then, of COURSE we should honor the "marriage"!

28 Jan 2012 09:37 PM
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DreamSnipers     
trillium13: This one married the Berlin Wall, and wrote about it.

Eija-Riitta Berliner-Mauer-A Berlin Wall Love Story (new window)


I found that story comforting. It is comforting to know that the US and Great Britain don't have a monopoly on all the world's non AK-47 armed whack jobs, and comforting to know she is a long way away.

28 Jan 2012 09:40 PM
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suthrnrunt     
Hagenhatesyouall: suthrnrunt: Hagenhatesyouall: GreenSun: The building can't say NO.

Who are you to say who she can and can't marry?

Arranged marriages have taken place for thousands of years. Consent is immaterial.

i think you are missing a key point in your own argument. Arranged marriages have two parties involved, so there is someone speaking for both members of the marriage. Where is the 2nd party that speaks for the building?

to dumb it down for you, if the owner of the building doesn't consent to the fat one marrying their building, she can not marry the building.

And if consent IS granted by said owner?

Well, then, of COURSE we should honor the "marriage"!


yes, if for no other reason than for the owner of the building to have the building divorce her the moment she uses a spin cycle for pleasure.

28 Jan 2012 09:41 PM
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fracas     
Oh man. I saw that building with some hussy from Code Enforcement. Should I speak now, or forever hold my peace?

28 Jan 2012 09:41 PM
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404 page not found     
As long as the building is a male, what's the problem?

ONE MAN, ONE WOMEN.

28 Jan 2012 09:43 PM
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phunkey_monkey     
For Pete sakes, that woman should let the century old building die with dignity.I highly doubt that the building would like to get 'laid in public' a second time.

28 Jan 2012 09:43 PM
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DreamSnipers     
trillium13: This one married the Berlin Wall, and wrote about it.

Eija-Riitta Berliner-Mauer-A Berlin Wall Love Story (new window)


I almost forgot, I have a piece of Eija's true love. Nephew brought it for me from Germany when he was visiting there. He thought it would be a cool gift. I thought so too. So far it hasn't done anything particularly strange, or loveable for that matter.

28 Jan 2012 09:46 PM
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Gyrfalcon     
404 page not found: As long as the building is a male, what's the problem?

ONE MAN, ONE WOMEN.


Women are plural.

Guess our children don't be learning.

28 Jan 2012 09:55 PM
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SweetSilverBlues     
This is not a good thing.

I give it six months, tops. She will be disillusioned by the huge age difference, and the fact that her husband is, let's face it, not exactly structurally secure for the types of relations she's going to expect.

Eventually she'll turn to the doors of some young, glass and steel behemoth for comfort. It won't mean anything, since the recession the young'un is all flash and no cash. He'll be empty inside.

Still, she'll leave her well-intentioned but woefully mismatched and solid husband for the shiny new toy.

Only to realize she means less than nothing to him once that brand new lease gets signed by a hot young company with burgeoning assets amply displayed.

She'll end up flitting from meaningless relationships with convenience stores, Wal-marts, and warehouses, lamenting the elderly security she once had.

Finally she'll shack up with a taco hut and spawn a new generation of needy Quonset huts.

Mark my words.

28 Jan 2012 10:16 PM
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ace in your face     
404 page not found: As long as the building is a male, what's the problem?

ONE MAN, ONE WOMEN.


Farking mormons.

28 Jan 2012 10:18 PM
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bigbadideasinaction     
Hagenhatesyouall: GreenSun: The building can't say NO.

Who are you to say who she can and can't marry?

Arranged marriages have taken place for thousands of years. Consent is immaterial.


In fact, Republicans should be pushing for arranged marriages, seeing as they were the "traditional" way of doing them, right?

28 Jan 2012 10:27 PM
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