I swear I will not kill anyone.

"It's not a Miata!..."

- Remember, officer, when I promised to stay under the speed limit?
- That's right, sir! You did!
- I lied.

I always thought you'd be taller.

No officer, I didn't realize there were laws against over-compensating.

Have you seen this boy?

"I'm in a rush to get my teeth whitened, look!"

"Good Morning officer!"

"Who is your daddy, and what does he do?"


SCREEEEEECH - ZOOOOOOOOM!

"I had Taco Bell for lunch, for the love of god I have to get home, fast!"

Aiy am zure aiy haf mein immigazon paperz zomevere hier, miztur ahrizonah pohliz offizur.

If you deeport me, Aiyl bee bahk.

"I need your clothes, your boots and your motorcycle"

"If you forgot the speed limit, Sir, we can remember it for you wholesale."

"Let me go if you want to live."

I'M ALSO A COP, YOU IDIOT.

"I'll be BAC"

No more complaining. No more Mr. Kimble, I have to go the bathroom. Nothing! There IS no bathroom!

If I am not me, who da hell am I?

If it bleeds, we can kill it.

The difference is... I'm just going to kill you.

I don't know what the problem is, but I'm sure it can be solved without resorting to violence.

Consider this a divorce.

[unintelligible German-accented gibberish]

The Governator visualizes:

POSSIBLE RESPONSE:
YES/NO
OR WHAT?
GO AWAY
PLEASE COME BACK LATER
FARK YOU, ASSHOLE

I am not the droid you are looking for.

Candygram for Mongo: Boys have a penis. Girls have a vagina.

Now accepting sympathy votes.

Sorry officer, I was just on my way to fark the maid.

STOP WHINING

I'm tryin' to get to da choppah!!

EUAAAGH EUAAAGH EUAAAGH

I'm here to WRITE .... YOU .... UP!

Tax Boy: Aiy am zure aiy haf mein immigazon paperz zomevere hier, miztur ahrizonah pohliz offizur.

If you deeport me, Aiyl bee bahk.

I just realized that all lolcats are speaking with Austrian accents

which explains the huge number of Hitler kitties

"You mother f****r. I'm going to f*** you."
"I own California" " I OWN CALIFORNIA"
"I will spend all my dollahs getting even with you!"
"F*****g Canadians..."
"The Canadians are responsible for all the wars in the world."
"Are you a Canadian?"

/voting enabled

oh, hai

My license and registration? I'll be bach.

Arnold: Good Morning!
Cop: Good Morning!
Arnold: How are you?
Cop: Good!
Arnold: Now I'd like to ask you a bunch of questions, and I want them answered immediately! Who is your daddy, and what does he do?
Cop: What?
Arnold: I'm Detective John Kimble.
Cop: What?
Arnold: Who are you!
Arnold: I'm a cop, you idiot!
Cop: Sir, I'm going to have to ask you to step out of the car.
Arnold: STOP IT!

(Reference)

Yaah, und Maria vass chuss a bagga bones.

[terminator.jpeg]
"These are not the drivers you are looking for, officer!"
-- Gandalf Grayhame

Have you seen this boy?

Policeman: Sir, why were you going so fast?

Arnold: To pass your enemies, to see them driving behind you, and to hear the lamentations of their women.

lokidecat: I'm tryin' to get to da choppah!!

phedex: EUAAAGH EUAAAGH EUAAAGH

these two captions, in this order, were the first two things I thought of when I saw the headline. get out of my head.

/gets the tinfoil

.
.
.

Officer: Sir do you know why I pulled you over?

Ahnold: Oh hai ! I'm... so glad to see you. What's going on? Is there a problem?

"Is your penis as small as mine"?

Two car lengths, huh? Well I'm also going to leave enough room for my fist, because I'm going to ram it into your stomach and RIP OUT YOUR GODDAMN SPINE!

Cop: " I knew you were short, but not THAT short!!"

One of us is in deep trouble.

'We haff to ged out of heah! They're trying to kill me!'

Is that mimetic polyalloy in your pants or you're just happy to see me?

Sorry officer, Joel Schumacher is trying to put me in another Batman movie.

Hello, cutie pie. One of us is in deep trouble.

"I'm so huge yet so tiny. Quite ze pardox. Is your mind blown?"

Cop: "Wow, Arnold Schwarzenegger! This is so cool. Of course, I am still going to have to give you a ticket...unless.."

Arnold:





Cop: Okay. You are free to go.

"Does Arnold Shwarzenegger have to choke a biatch?"

Arnold Uber Alles