Huh. You'd think their God would keep their places of worship intact from thieves.

You mean the sermons don't exist anymore?

Weren't the sermons already taking place in Georgia, subby?

He who is without heat among you, let him be the first to bring a fan.

FTFA: "You better just be careful because we protect our property," Warren says.

Sounds like he has no intention of turning the other cheek.

If only there was a book that instructed him how to deal with situations like this. Oh, that's right, the book only applies when religious people want it to apply.

Atheist Thieves!

nothing can stop them

Thought this was going to be about Diablo 3's upcoming launch day.

"There's nothing more disturbing than someone who either damages or steals from a place of worship," says Walker County Sheriff Steve Wilson.

Yes, nothing worse than that...

Farking Canuck: FTFA: "You better just be careful because we protect our property," Warren says.

Sounds like he has no intention of turning the other cheek.

Well said. Didn't Jesus say something to the effect if somebody is stealing something from you, just give it to them, and don't ask for it back?

DRFS Rich: "There's nothing more disturbing than someone who either damages or steals from a place of worship," says Walker County Sheriff Steve Wilson.

Yes, nothing worse than that...

I used to think child rape was the worst. Thankfully this fine lawman sorted me out.

"Stolen", or repossessed? I was talking with an A/C guy who said he'll no longer do business with churches unless they pay cash up front. He said churches were the absolute worst customers to collect from and he had to threaten the last two churches he did work for with leins and/or repossession to get paid. They would cry poor, or try to guilt him into working for free.

But I live in Florida, so take from that what you will.

LittleSmitty: "Stolen", or repossessed? I was talking with an A/C guy who said he'll no longer do business with churches unless they pay cash up front. He said churches were the absolute worst customers to collect from and he had to threaten the last two churches he did work for with leins and/or repossession to get paid. They would cry poor, or try to guilt him into working for free.

But I live in Florida, so take from that what you will.

I can just imagine this scenario: If you cut us a deal, I'll see to it that you move to the head of the Line to get into Heaven.

Trance750: Farking Canuck: FTFA: "You better just be careful because we protect our property," Warren says.

Sounds like he has no intention of turning the other cheek.

Well said. Didn't Jesus say something to the effect if somebody is stealing something from you, just give it to them, and don't ask for it back?

Look, we all know what the Bible says and what it means are two different things. It's all about the subtext. I mean, if you just took it at face value, you would think Jesus was some kind of communist. Give to the poor? Yeah, that's great and all, but what it really means is give to the poor in an amount that you can write off as a charitable tax deduction. That's the real message here; give so that you may be given to. Does this man look like a chump to you?


No. That man is a winner. He takes what He wants and writes off the amunition as a business expense. Yeah, the meek will inherit the Earth, after He has wrung it of its resources and hung it out to dry. Why? Because they are weak, and dumb. Who wants sloppy seconds anyway? The meek, apparently. You didn't see Jesus waiting in line for Mary Magdalene did you? Of course not. Why? Because he was a Baus.


So please, stop with the humility this and turning the other cheek that. That's for suckers. Jesus would take his pimp cane and smack those thieves' teeth out right before putting them on the corner and running a special on BJs.

'Christians' in the south have no air conditioning?


Matthew 22:14 For many are galled, but few are frozen.

Trance750: Farking Canuck: FTFA: "You better just be careful because we protect our property," Warren says.

Sounds like he has no intention of turning the other cheek.

Well said. Didn't Jesus say something to the effect if somebody is stealing something from you, just give it to them, and don't ask for it back?

I was referring to the threat of violence from the holy man. But this is the USA ... the land where god and guns go together.

Yes, stealing from a church has to be the worst crime there is. (new window)

aw, come on, I thought it was a funny headline, especially after I clicked the link to find out what it was about. Then I went back to the headline page and snickered.

/hard to type through tears in the sudden brimstone cloud, my chair just turned into a basket

//uh, smoking? I guess, why the fark not?

///on the slashies to hell chunka dow doww

DRFS Rich: "There's nothing more disturbing than someone who either damages or steals from a place of worship," says Walker County Sheriff Steve Wilson.

Yes, nothing worse than that...

==========================

Same quote I was going to post. There is nothing worse than that. Priests raping little boys, the Vatican keeping billions of dollars' worth of property and art instead of helping the poor and starving, but nothing is worse than going without air conditioning.

/Church was only getting some of its own medicine

Ryokan, a Zen master, lived the simplest kind of life in a little hut at the foot of a mountain. One evening a thief visited the hut only to discover there was nothing to steal.

Ryokan returned and caught him. "You have come a long way to visit me," he told the prowler, "and you should not return empty-handed. Please take my clothes as a gift."

The thief was bewildered. He took the clothes and slunk away.

Ryoken sat naked, watching the moon. "Poor fellow," he mused, "I wish I could have given him this beautiful moon."

..................

Bob, a pastor of the First Church of Christ Badass, lived a comfortable life watching over a little church. One evening a thief visited the church and discovered expensive air conditioning units.

Bob returned and caught him. "Boy, you broke into the wrong church," he told the prowler, "and you should put your empty hands up where I can see 'em. Or I'll give you the contents of this 12 gauge as a gift."

The thief was scared. He panicked and tried to run past Bob.

Bob sat with an empty gun, watching the lights of the approaching police cars. "Guess that thief is in hell where he belongs," he mused. "but I wish he hadn't ruined this beautiful carpet."

DRFS Rich: "There's nothing more disturbing than someone who either damages or steals from a place of worship," says Walker County Sheriff Steve Wilson.

Yes, nothing worse than that...

I see Captain Hyperbole got hired to police Walker County.

Matthew 5:5 - "How blessed are those who are able to install cooling, because it is they who will inherit the earth!"

Or some such translation

Farking Canuck: Trance750: Farking Canuck: FTFA: "You better just be careful because we protect our property," Warren says.

Sounds like he has no intention of turning the other cheek.

Well said. Didn't Jesus say something to the effect if somebody is stealing something from you, just give it to them, and don't ask for it back?

I was referring to the threat of violence from the holy man. But this is the USA ... the land where god and guns go together.

And I'm sure Jesus is sitting Up There just saying 'Kill, buddy, kill'

I heard a theory once, that since the advent of AC units, church attendance hadn't gone up as expected, but continued to go down. The idea was that the heat of the summer added to the weight of the hellfire and brimstone message of the preacher, and motivated people to sit in church to save themselves from even worse torments.