Wait a minute....isn't that.....THE VILLAGE OF THE DAMNED??????

Lord Farkington of Dangly Nads

Pointy Tail of Satan: Wait a minute....isn't that.....THE VILLAGE OF THE DAMNED??????

Nope. That was Letchmore Heath apparently

Heh, "Letchmore".

Where'd you get that jacket???

Lordship? Well, Lord of the Manor. It's not like you can buy a peerage. These folks are looking for quite the ROI.

What their door knocker might look like



Also good for keeping Jehovah's witnesses and Mormons away

"The castle needs some work, you say?"

Looks like a trailer park.

It's a goddamn trailer park built in front of a castle that, until the 1950's, was actually standing. Then this asshole's family came along and 70 years later the castle is almost a stone fence and the grounds are full of double-wides.

Don't reward this man.

If I buy a castle that (according to the article) is rivaling Downton Abbey for coolness, I expect one of the sisters to be included in the deal.

/preferably the one who played Susan Sto Helit
//failing that, the hot blonde maid

Lsherm: It's a goddamn trailer park built in front of a castle that, until the 1950's, was actually standing. Then this asshole's family came along and 70 years later the castle is almost a stone fence and the grounds are full of double-wides.

Don't reward this man.


RTFA would reveal that the castle burnt down before the family bought it.

I do agree that building the trailer park so close to the castle should earn them a good kicking.

If I had that kind of money I would totally buy this. Sadly, I do not.

ViralMonkey: Lsherm: It's a goddamn trailer park built in front of a castle that, until the 1950's, was actually standing. Then this asshole's family came along and 70 years later the castle is almost a stone fence and the grounds are full of double-wides.

Don't reward this man.


RTFA would reveal that the castle burnt down before the family bought it.

Actually, it burned down, fell over, and then sank into the swamp.

/How does a castle burn?

50's and 60's era homes that look like double wides...

Me thinks there be lead and asbestos removal costs ahead for anyone interested in this suspiciously cheap lot. Would the rents make this a good buy?

AssAsInAssassin: ViralMonkey: Lsherm: It's a goddamn trailer park built in front of a castle that, until the 1950's, was actually standing. Then this asshole's family came along and 70 years later the castle is almost a stone fence and the grounds are full of double-wides.

Don't reward this man.


RTFA would reveal that the castle burnt down before the family bought it.

Actually, it burned down, fell over, and then sank into the swamp.

/How does a castle burn?
If you had ever seen how much solid wood paneling and rafters there are in one you wouldn't ask that question.

I'm distantly related as I am on the Manfredjinsinjin-Blenkinsopp side of the family. I could turn the castle remains into a safe house and then bulldoze the trailer park. I'll give it some thought.

CHUMP CHANGE!

/can anybody spare a chump or two?

malaktaus: If I had that kind of money I would totally buy this. Sadly, I do not.

Group buy. Welcome to farktopia.

So WTF is the title?

AssAsInAssassin: RTFA would reveal that the castle burnt down before the family bought it.

Actually, it burned down, fell over, and then sank into the swamp.

/How does a castle burn?

Dragons.

seems as good a place as any to post this

Sabrehawk: AssAsInAssassin: RTFA would reveal that the castle burnt down before the family bought it.

Actually, it burned down, fell over, and then sank into the swamp.

/How does a castle burn?

Dragons.

He was no dragon. Fire cannot kill the dragon.

ViralMonkey: Lsherm: It's a goddamn trailer park built in front of a castle that, until the 1950's, was actually standing. Then this asshole's family came along and 70 years later the castle is almost a stone fence and the grounds are full of double-wides.

Don't reward this man.


RTFA would reveal that the castle burnt down before the family bought it.

I do agree that building the trailer park so close to the castle should earn them a good kicking.

I actually knew that, I was just thinking a rich family would have restored the castle. Instead, we have 70 years of cheap, which is incredibly evident by the fully functioning trailer park and even more decrepit castle ruins. They couldn't even use the proceeds from the trailer park to help restore the castle, likely because it didn't generate enough revenue to do so.

We're looking at an historical Florida plantation in England if it was taken over in the 50's by a Florida redneck. They couldn't afford the property, so they turned it into the cheapest rent possible, which just drove it into trash territory. He's selling the British equivalent of slumlord status with historical property.

Oh just rent the idiotic place out for weddings, retreats and renaissance fairs.

Or sell it to Nick Cage...that guy will buy anything.

We could nuke it from space. It's the only way to be sure....

FTFA: 'Our family took it over which wasn't the done thing for someone who wasn't a toff to buy a castle in those days.'

Translation, please?

ndubyaj: FTFA: 'Our family took it over which wasn't the done thing for someone who wasn't a toff to buy a castle in those days.'

Translation, please?

English motherfarker, do you speak it?

/no idea either

ndubyaj: FTFA: 'Our family took it over which wasn't the done thing for someone who wasn't a toff to buy a castle in those days.'

Translation, please?

They were average income people who had the opportunity to buy a castle and it wasn't usual. Why? Because rich people wouldn't buy it.

We see how it ended up: trailer park.

Now he's trying to sell a trailer park.

Lsherm: They were average income people who had the opportunity to buy a castle and it wasn't usual. Why? Because rich people wouldn't buy it.

Thanks for the translation... I was way off. I figured it had something to do with lager and livestock.

I can't imagine how much lawn maintenance would be involved.

If it came with an action figure... I would be on it right now!
Lord Dangly Jangly

Looks like the "reporter" was paid to advertise for this sale for him. Also he bought it and flipped it now he's trying to unload it. Probably over priced like a mofo.

FabulousFreep: Looks like the "reporter" was paid to advertise for this sale for him. Also he bought it and flipped it now he's trying to unload it. Probably over priced like a mofo.

Wat? Do you know what "flip" means? Here's a hint- if a property has been in your family for half a century, you are failing at flipping.

/I like the group buy idea. Around 20-30 of us should be able to do it. I call dibs on the pub!

perhaps subby had me in mind...i don't know, just a guess.

/subby is here and drunk

Am I allowed the rite of 'First night' with the local peasantry?

Bring forth the peasants and tavern wenches, so that I might know them!



/GIS for 'peasant ho' has let me down

MythDragon: /GIS for 'peasant ho' has let me down

Should've gone with "peasant wench"



/butterface
//hotlink'd

I'll start the bidding at $10, but I should warn you that I intend to rule with an iron fist. I'm also invoking prima nocta.

phrawgh: So WTF is the title?



Count DeMonet

You think they'd mind if I just called myself Lord Summerisle instead? and maybe built a few statues out of the local greenery?

Whoever buys it should get rid of the trailer park.

Mock26: Whoever buys it should get rid of the trailer park.

No. They should keep the trailer park, turn the pub into a museum of taxidermy humor and establish a weekly flea market/carnival. A bowling alley with bingo room would be nice, too.

Mock26: Whoever buys it should get rid of the trailer park.

You'd be relying on income from the place to keep it going. Renting the land for the trailers is probably a significant chunk of that.

ThighsofGlory: Mock26: Whoever buys it should get rid of the trailer park.

No. They should keep the trailer park, turn the pub into a museum of taxidermy humor and establish a weekly flea market/carnival. A bowling alley with bingo room would be nice, too.

Damn, you got the hipster market down pat. You in advertising?

Notabunny: phrawgh: So WTF is the title?

[img.photobucket.com image 320x240]

Count DeMonet

You magnificent bastard.
I need a new keyboard.

sinanju: Mock26: Whoever buys it should get rid of the trailer park.

You'd be relying on income from the place to keep it going. Renting the land for the trailers is probably a significant chunk of that.

There are other ways to make money.

uber humper: ThighsofGlory: Mock26: Whoever buys it should get rid of the trailer park.

No. They should keep the trailer park, turn the pub into a museum of taxidermy humor and establish a weekly flea market/carnival. A bowling alley with bingo room would be nice, too.

Damn, you got the hipster market down pat. You in advertising?

I'm assistant brewer at a gastropub/nanobrewery in Martinez, CA. I know my hipsters.

ThighsofGlory: uber humper: ThighsofGlory: Mock26: Whoever buys it should get rid of the trailer park.

No. They should keep the trailer park, turn the pub into a museum of taxidermy humor and establish a weekly flea market/carnival. A bowling alley with bingo room would be nice, too.

Damn, you got the hipster market down pat. You in advertising?

I'm assistant brewer at a gastropub/nanobrewery in Martinez, CA. I know my hipsters.

Add drag queens to your bowling and bingo, and then you would have yourself a winner.

By the way, it is true the Martini was invented in Martinez?

I don't know if the Martini was invented here. E Clampus Vitus put up a plaque declaring that to be true, but they were probably drunk at the time. I do know that quite a lot of our civic celebrations involve getting liquored up in public. We're home to the East Bay Craft Beer Festival, the least pretentious of its kind, which makes our brewer have a tiny sad. He's used to Davis. Not enough boobies here for him. And we have the Main Street Stroll, or what I call The Wine Wobble, every six months or so. We also enjoy parades, drawing on the sidewalk, bocce 'tournaments' where the last guy sober enough to play wins, and the semi-biannual dinghy regatta. If we get permission to close the street in front of our place, this July 4 we may have Drag Racing. We'll say it's for charity.