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   Scarlett Johansson wants a Black Widow movie. Hey, anything that gets her back into that tight leather outfit is a winner

05 May 2012 04:35 PM   |   4126 clicks   |   Daily Stab
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FiatJustitia     
upload.wikimedia.org

www.traileraddict.com


/thread

05 May 2012 09:56 AM
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PizzaJedi81     
FiatJustitia: [upload.wikimedia.org image 220x326]

[www.traileraddict.com image 432x640]


/thread


I dunno...a good script, a good director, could be decent. Plus, Marvel Studios has a decent track record sicne they started (Which was AFTER Elektra.), so I could see this being okay.

05 May 2012 10:04 AM
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king_nacho    [TotalFark]  
collider.com

05 May 2012 10:12 AM
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Shostie    [TotalFark]  
Damn straight. I honestly had no idea what was going on in Iron Man 2 whenever she was on screen.

05 May 2012 10:13 AM
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PizzaJedi81     
Scarlett is a peach. Like when you eat a peach that is so ripe you can push your thumb through the skin. The juice runs down your chin and drips onto your chest, and the place in between your fingers gets so sticky you have trouble separating them. The next day, even after you wash your hands, you can still smell the sweet juice on your skin and, if no one is watching, you lick your fingers and the memory of that sweet fruit on your tongue floods back. Scarlett is like that.

05 May 2012 10:16 AM
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hubiestubert    [TotalFark]  
While they are playing around with the Marvel properties, I want to see a gottverdammt Black Panther movie.

And yes, MOAR Black Widow.

05 May 2012 10:32 AM
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SilentStrider    [TotalFark]  
I would not say no to this, if done right.

05 May 2012 12:17 PM
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9beers     
I'm cool with it as long as it also has Hulk, Thor, Iron Man and Captain America.

fark Hawkeye.

05 May 2012 12:41 PM
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Hoban Washburne    [TotalFark]  
I don't think Scarlett's Black Widow could carry a movie by herself. And I love Scarlett.

05 May 2012 12:52 PM
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PizzaJedi81     
Hoban Washburne: I don't think Scarlett's Black Widow could carry a movie by herself. And I love Scarlett.

Well...not to boast, but the film I made with her is EXCELLENT.

05 May 2012 12:57 PM
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GAT_00     
Hoban Washburne: I don't think Scarlett's Black Widow could carry a movie by herself. And I love Scarlett.

Well, if Keanu can manage it, I suppose someone who is as bad of an actor as she is can.

05 May 2012 01:11 PM
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Durendal    [TotalFark]  
Sure. Just make sure she's wearing that same dress as the interrogation scene. I didn't see anything but jiggling boobies during that. I think she was beating some guys up, but I really wasn't focused on it.

05 May 2012 01:33 PM
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Mentat    [TotalFark]  
They did a great job with her character. What the hell, go for it.

05 May 2012 01:36 PM
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Slaxl     
Well in Iron Man 2 she walked through a hallway and knocked people out just by dodging their punch swings and tripping them up. Think that could stretch to 90 minutes?

05 May 2012 01:42 PM
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ArkAngel    [TotalFark]  
Scarlett Johansson wants a Black Widow movie. Hey, anything that gets her out of back into that tight leather outfit is a winner

FTFSubby

05 May 2012 01:43 PM
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PizzaJedi81     
Slaxl: Well in Iron Man 2 she walked through a hallway and knocked people out just by dodging their punch swings and tripping them up. Think that could stretch to 90 minutes?

I'd give her something to stretch fo r90 minutes, if you know what I mean, and I think you do.

/okay, 90 seconds.
//FINE...9 seconds.

05 May 2012 02:01 PM
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hubiestubert    [TotalFark]  
Slaxl: Well in Iron Man 2 she walked through a hallway and knocked people out just by dodging their punch swings and tripping them up. Think that could stretch to 90 minutes?

YES.

BEST PART?

FOREVER!

05 May 2012 02:04 PM
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wee    [TotalFark]  
She was the worst part of Iron Man 2. So, no.

05 May 2012 02:20 PM
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RexTalionis    [TotalFark]  
PizzaJedi81: Scarlett is a peach. Like when you eat a peach that is so ripe you can push your thumb through the skin. The juice runs down your chin and drips onto your chest, and the place in between your fingers gets so sticky you have trouble separating them. The next day, even after you wash your hands, you can still smell the sweet juice on your skin and, if no one is watching, you lick your fingers and the memory of that sweet fruit on your tongue floods back. Scarlett is like that.

So, what you're saying is that you want to puncture Scarlett Johansson's skin with your fingers and then let the blood run down your chin and drip onto your chest, then stick your fingers into the offal and viscera so that they get so sticky that you have trouble separating them. Then, the next day, even after you wash your hands, you can still smell the blood on your skin, and if no one is watching, you lick your fingers and let the memory of Scarlett's blood on your tongue come flooding back?

05 May 2012 02:34 PM
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PizzaJedi81     
RexTalionis: PizzaJedi81: Scarlett is a peach. Like when you eat a peach that is so ripe you can push your thumb through the skin. The juice runs down your chin and drips onto your chest, and the place in between your fingers gets so sticky you have trouble separating them. The next day, even after you wash your hands, you can still smell the sweet juice on your skin and, if no one is watching, you lick your fingers and the memory of that sweet fruit on your tongue floods back. Scarlett is like that.

So, what you're saying is that you want to puncture Scarlett Johansson's skin with your fingers and then let the blood run down your chin and drip onto your chest, then stick your fingers into the offal and viscera so that they get so sticky that you have trouble separating them. Then, the next day, even after you wash your hands, you can still smell the blood on your skin, and if no one is watching, you lick your fingers and let the memory of Scarlett's blood on your tongue come flooding back?


Exactly!

05 May 2012 02:37 PM
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Mugato    [TotalFark]  
At least a trilogy of Avengers, more Hulk movies, more Thors and more Iron Man movies are in the works. Let's not saturate the market too much.

05 May 2012 02:40 PM
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PizzaJedi81     
Mugato: Let's not saturate the market too much.

I'd saturate Scarlett, if ya know what I mean, and I think you do.

05 May 2012 02:42 PM
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timujin    [TotalFark]  
Didn't she just say two days ago that she was tired of movies that portrayed her as a sex symbol?

05 May 2012 03:05 PM
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Man On A Mission    [TotalFark]  
timujin: Didn't she just say two days ago that she was tired of movies that portrayed her as a sex symbol having any type of career if she stops using her marketable assets?

FTFY.

/ tired of starlets who complain about being sex symbols
// how do you think you got hired in the first place?
/// You're not Kathy Bates, chickie poo.

05 May 2012 03:13 PM
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Mugato    [TotalFark]  
timujin: Didn't she just say two days ago that she was tired of movies that portrayed her as a sex symbol?

The Black Widow is not a sex symbol. She's a deadly assassin and her outfit and hair and makeup are all 100% functional.

....well at least she doesn't wear heels like Catwoman.

05 May 2012 03:18 PM
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Mentat    [TotalFark]  
Mugato: The Black Widow is not a sex symbol. She's a deadly assassin and her outfit and hair and makeup are all 100% functional.

I thought she might be overshadowed with all of the male heroes in the movie, but I think she turned out to be the lynchpin of the entire team. Good work from Whedon in pulling that off.

05 May 2012 04:10 PM
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Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener     
...

[imokaywiththis.jpg]

05 May 2012 04:21 PM
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Flappyhead     
FiatJustitia: [upload.wikimedia.org image 220x326]

[www.traileraddict.com image 432x640]


/thread


Mute button.

05 May 2012 04:39 PM
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jimmyego    [TotalFark]  
I have never heard of this super-heroine, but am confused by the Wiki page. Is this the one who kills people and delivers their souls to Satan or the one who sounds like some kind of USSR cyborg spy? The former sounds more interesting.

05 May 2012 04:39 PM
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Mentat    [TotalFark]  
jimmyego: I have never heard of this super-heroine, but am confused by the Wiki page. Is this the one who kills people and delivers their souls to Satan or the one who sounds like some kind of USSR cyborg spy? The former sounds more interesting.

Former Russian spy.

05 May 2012 04:49 PM
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Diogenes Teufelsdrockh     
wee: She was the worst part of Iron Man 2. So, no.

This

Any presence Johansson has on the big screen is ruined the moment she opens her mouth or does anything that requires movement or expression for that matter.

There are better looking bad actresses out there, if that's what the director wants. Yet, here she is again, the female Shia LeBeouf being the worst part of more than her fair share of movies

/Same as Megan Fox
//The go-to girl for for closeted movie watchers or those with no taste to claim to like so they won't be judged?

05 May 2012 04:55 PM
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TravisBickle62     
Just so long as there is an "ass to ass" scene

05 May 2012 05:01 PM
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coco ebert    [TotalFark]  
She's gorgeous but she's such a dull actress. I know, I know, the former negates the latter, but still...

05 May 2012 05:05 PM
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Flappyhead     
ArkAngel: Scarlett Johansson wants a Black Widow movie. Hey, anything that gets her out of back into that tight leather outfit is a winner

FTFSubby


I've already seen that.

05 May 2012 05:05 PM
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Rann Xerox    [TotalFark]  
TravisBickle62: Just so long as there is an "ass to ass" scene

i78.photobucket.com

05 May 2012 05:08 PM
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Wasn't Looking at his Neck     
wee: She Whiplash biatching about a parrot was the worst part of Iron Man 2.

05 May 2012 05:09 PM
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strawberryfieldsforever     
30.media.tumblr.com

05 May 2012 05:13 PM
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Gosling     
Man On A Mission: timujin: Didn't she just say two days ago that she was tired of movies that portrayed her as a sex symbol having any type of career if she stops using her marketable assets?

FTFY.

/ tired of starlets who complain about being sex symbols
// how do you think you got hired in the first place?
/// You're not Kathy Bates, chickie poo.


I recall how Tina Fey wrote in her book, Bossypants, that this happens even to the actually good actresses. She noted how some TV shows will wind up in danger of cancellation, or not being picked up, solely because some executive- inevitably male- will look at the cast and say, literally, "I don't want to fark any of these people." Boom. Cancelled.

It doesn't matter how good they are. They could have a Best Actress Oscar for all Hollywood cares. As soon as people stop wanting to have sex with them, work starts drying up.

The problem doesn't lie with the actresses doing the complaining. The problem lies with the men doing the hiring. The actresses have a legitimate complaint. Scarlett is right.

05 May 2012 05:18 PM
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The_Knarf     
I find the lack of Scarlet pics in black leather in this thread disturbing!

05 May 2012 05:21 PM
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Mugato    [TotalFark]  
Gosling: I recall how Tina Fey wrote in her book, Bossypants, that this happens even to the actually good actresses. She noted how some TV shows will wind up in danger of cancellation, or not being picked up, solely because some executive- inevitably male- will look at the cast and say, literally, "I don't want to fark any of these people." Boom. Cancelled.

Please tell me that was really Janeane Garafalo who said that. I still have respect for Tina. TV shows are canceled because of ratings. TV executives lose their jobs very easily and they're not going to renew or cancel shows because of ass. She knows better than that.

05 May 2012 05:26 PM
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Carth     
Black Widow and Ant Man coming to theaters summer 2014

05 May 2012 05:31 PM
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Tarl3k     
Mugato: timujin: Didn't she just say two days ago that she was tired of movies that portrayed her as a sex symbol?

The Black Widow is not a sex symbol. She's a deadly assassin and her outfit and hair and makeup are all 100% functional.

....well at least she doesn't wear heels like Catwoman.


There will be NO bad-talking catwoman!!! She is being played by my future ex-wife, I will not hear anything bad said about her!!!!

05 May 2012 05:31 PM
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fusillade762    [TotalFark]  
Wow, 40 posts and nobody yet complaining about how she's not really all that attractive? Shocking.

05 May 2012 05:32 PM
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Nina_Hartley's_Ass     
thefifthbranch.com

05 May 2012 05:37 PM
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skinink    [TotalFark]  

I know a lot of people hate reboots of recent movies, but I would rather see a reboot of DareDevil before Black Widow gets her own movie. DD was just played for laughs (that see-saw scene was just stupid). If a Whedon or Chris Nolan type director agrees to do DD, he has so much great backstory that they really could do him justice.


I liked Michael Duncan as Kingpin, I would like to see him recast in the role.


05 May 2012 05:38 PM
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Mugato    [TotalFark]  
skinink: but I would rather see a reboot of DareDevil before Black Widow gets her own movie. DD was just played for laughs (that see-saw scene was just stupid)

Aside from the horrible playground scene, I thought it was okay. The character itself doesn't really interest me but that wasn't the movie's fault.

05 May 2012 05:44 PM
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DamnYankees    [TotalFark]  
Just saw the Avengers - can't believe there's no thread today on point, so I guess this comes closest.

It was good. IMO, it's the third best of this series of movies, behind the first Iron Man and Captain America. Some very good moments in the film, some very nice laughs, and the Hulk absolutely steals the show. But it's not really 'great' - I can't really see myself seeing it again. It was just...pleasant.

Solid 8/10.

05 May 2012 05:46 PM
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chewielouie     
Diogenes Teufelsdrockh: wee: She was the worst part of Iron Man 2. So, no.

This

Any presence Johansson has on the big screen is ruined the moment she opens her mouth or does anything that requires movement or expression for that matter.


You guys saw a different Iron Man 2 than the rest of us.

also

knowhowiknowyouregay.jpg

05 May 2012 05:55 PM
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Gosling     
Mugato: Gosling: I recall how Tina Fey wrote in her book, Bossypants, that this happens even to the actually good actresses. She noted how some TV shows will wind up in danger of cancellation, or not being picked up, solely because some executive- inevitably male- will look at the cast and say, literally, "I don't want to fark any of these people." Boom. Cancelled.

Please tell me that was really Janeane Garafalo who said that. I still have respect for Tina. TV shows are canceled because of ratings. TV executives lose their jobs very easily and they're not going to renew or cancel shows because of ass. She knows better than that.


I have the book in my hands now, and I look to have remembered it slightly wrong- it's more about how women become unemployable after 40 and get labeled "crazy" as justification for not wanting to deal with them anymore after you cease wanting to have sex with them- but I got it pretty close. In any case, here's the quote, page 271 of the hardcover edition:

"This is the infuriating thing that dawns on you one day: Even if you would never sleep with or even flirt with anyone to get ahead, you are still being sexually adjudicated by these LA creeps. Network executives really do say things like "I don't know. I don't want to fark anybody on this show." They really do say that stuff. That's not just lactation-stopping dialouge on Entourage.

(To any exec who has ever said that about me, I would hope you would at least have the intelligence and self-awareness to know that the feeling is extremely mutual.)"

05 May 2012 05:57 PM
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Saturn5     
PizzaJedi81: Scarlett is a peach. Like when you eat a peach that is so ripe you can push your thumb through the skin. The juice runs down your chin and drips onto your chest, and the place in between your fingers gets so sticky you have trouble separating them. The next day, even after you wash your hands, you can still smell the sweet juice on your skin and, if no one is watching, you lick your fingers and the memory of that sweet fruit on your tongue floods back. Scarlett is like that.

Titty sprinkles.

05 May 2012 06:05 PM
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