I don't really see a problem here. Grilled squirrel with biscuits and gravy, that'll take care of your problem.

Chipmunks are ReaverSquirrels. Not to be trifled with.

That said, bring it... My minions are everywhere!

Would rat poison in the bird feeders help?

Why does this squirrel reek of sex?

Seriously? How farking stupid is this guy? There are plenty of bird feeders out there that are pretty much squirrel-proof.

Mock26: Seriously? How farking stupid is this guy? There are plenty of bird feeders out there that are pretty much squirrel-proof.

FTA: "The bird feeder, which hangs in the backyard oak tree, is squirrel-proof only in theory. The lid has a twist-lock feature that makes it impossible for squirrels to pry off, unless they suddenly develop opposable thumbs. And the feeder's ports close if anything heavier than the average bird stands on the circular platform.

But the feeder's warranty doesn't cover break-ins by squirrels who have ingenuity and a lot of time on their paws. LeBron has learned to position himself on the branch directly above the feeder. Then he shakes it like a Polaroid picture, to quote OutKast.

When the branch wobbles, birdseed flies out of the ports in all directions. It lands on the grass, where LeBron's buddies are waiting. Sometimes, LeBron manages to shake the feeder out of the tree. I've watched him do this, and you can't tell me squirrels don't smile."

This sorry excuse for a human being allowed a squirrel to whup him. And now is bragging about it. What a freaking wuss.

Most humans have adapted to use tools, such as devices that were designed to throw rocks REALLY fast, often fast enough to penetrate a mammal body.

Just kill it with a bb gun, this is why Canada will never rule the world.

Give it a month. Squirrel Hitler can't be trusted. He'll double cross the chipmunks and lay siege to their acorn reserve. That's when we strike.

I used to feed a squirrel in my back yard. She Would take the nuts and hide them. And I would dig them up and give them back to her.

/She caught on to my scam.

Dookie-chute: Just kill it with a bb gun, this is why Canada will never rule the world.

Canada gave us Justin Bieber and Nickleback. Their pecking order was in the toilet long ago.

Aw........nuts......

bim1154: Dookie-chute: Just kill it with a bb gun, this is why Canada will never rule the world.

Canada gave us Justin Bieber and Nickleback. Their pecking order was in the toilet long ago.

And Celine Deon

LoneWolf343: Mock26: Seriously? How farking stupid is this guy? There are plenty of bird feeders out there that are pretty much squirrel-proof.

FTA: "The bird feeder, which hangs in the backyard oak tree, is squirrel-proof only in theory. The lid has a twist-lock feature that makes it impossible for squirrels to pry off, unless they suddenly develop opposable thumbs. And the feeder's ports close if anything heavier than the average bird stands on the circular platform.

But the feeder's warranty doesn't cover break-ins by squirrels who have ingenuity and a lot of time on their paws. LeBron has learned to position himself on the branch directly above the feeder. Then he shakes it like a Polaroid picture, to quote OutKast.

When the branch wobbles, birdseed flies out of the ports in all directions. It lands on the grass, where LeBron's buddies are waiting. Sometimes, LeBron manages to shake the feeder out of the tree. I've watched him do this, and you can't tell me squirrels don't smile."

So this is not one of those. My parents have a simple bird feeder with a metal one over the top. Any time a squirrel tries to climb down the cone it tilts and they fall to the ground. In the years they had it while I lived there I never once saw a squirrel that was able to get at the bird seed.

...and you can't tell me squirrels don't smile.

Trance750: bim1154: Dookie-chute: Just kill it with a bb gun, this is why Canada will never rule the world.

Canada gave us Justin Bieber and Nickleback. Their pecking order was in the toilet long ago.

And Celine Deon

There's too many Gay Farkers here that like her. I didn't want to stir things up.

Trance750: bim1154: Dookie-chute: Just kill it with a bb gun, this is why Canada will never rule the world.

Canada gave us Justin Bieber and Nickleback. Their pecking order was in the toilet long ago.

And Celine Deon

A list of Canadian actors turns up more good than bad.

IMHO

Homeowner problems

The squirrel problem is getting worse.

I don't have a squirrel problem. I do have an air rifle and pointy little hunting pellets, however. A .177 to the rib cage or head, and B'rer Asshole is no longer a problem.

Years ago, squirrels did hundreds of dollars of damage in my front & back yard. I don't have that problem any more - the occasional curious grey-tailed lookie-loo gets a humane death and a swift burial. On occasion, I harvest the tail, as the fur is useful for making brushes used by folks that illuminate documents, to handle gold leaf. The meat's no good - doesn't taste right.

ZMugg: Trance750: bim1154: Dookie-chute: Just kill it with a bb gun, this is why Canada will never rule the world.

Canada gave us Justin Bieber and Nickleback. Their pecking order was in the toilet long ago.

And Celine Deon

A list of Canadian actors turns up more good than bad.

IMHO

Don't come in here pissing our Canadian hate man.... We were doing just fine with out any serious shiat.

FormlessOne: I don't have a squirrel problem. I do have an air rifle and pointy little hunting pellets, however. A .177 to the rib cage or head, and B'rer Asshole is no longer a problem.

Years ago, squirrels did hundreds of dollars of damage in my front & back yard. I don't have that problem any more - the occasional curious grey-tailed lookie-loo gets a humane death and a swift burial. On occasion, I harvest the tail, as the fur is useful for making brushes used by folks that illuminate documents, to handle gold leaf. The meat's no good - doesn't taste right.

Our dog usually kills 2 or 4 chipmunks a summer. For the life of me I can't catch on to how she's fast enough get them.

It's referred to as a squarrel btw.

Wanted for questioning.

Chip and Dale wanted for questioning.

'

I may have accidentally murdered a squirrel the other day.

I know what you are thinking; the furry bastage ran out into the street in front of my car. Well, that's not what happened.

I workout with a group of people; when the weather is good, we exercise in the park; which is only a block away from the gym. Last thursday, we were throwing medicine balls. I threw my ball; when I had gone to retrieve my ball, I noticed the body of a squirrel. The squirrel was sprawled, stomach down; less than an inch from my medicine ball. His back had been broken, and he wasn't moving.

It isn't 100%, either way, the physical evidence points equally towards murder and an acciedental fall. He couldn't have been there long; he had not been snapped up by a dog ( lots of people walk their dogs in the park) and he didn't smell yet. His back was obviously broken; that, and the proximity of my medicine ball point to murder. But, his lack of any movement/sound points to a fall from the tree I found him under.

/ I guess I can put that on my resume; accurate medicine ball throwing, that is

// I did not intentionally, or with maliced for thought throw a medicine ball at a squirrel

As someone who just finished pouring red pepper flakes into the bird feeder - supposedly squirrels hate that but birds don't notice - I'm getting a real kick out of this discussion. Our squirrel gang has a clear leader, White Tail, who doesn't even run when our car pulls into the driveway

They are bastards, every last one of the little furry buggers. I cannot grow zucchini, cukes, squash, and a bunch of other stuff in my garden because they eat it. They take their share of tomatoes but leave me enough to not turn to popping the little farks.

I just spent the better part of 2 days squirrel-proofing my lettuce and herbs. Chicken wire looks like shiat, but does the jerb.

I end up offloading about a dozen a year with a Havahart trap. Lady I work with has 15 acres of woods, she takes them. Plenty of room to play. I'm an animal lover, and don't want to hurt them but they are frustrating as hell.

bim1154: FormlessOne: I don't have a squirrel problem. I do have an air rifle and pointy little hunting pellets, however. A .177 to the rib cage or head, and B'rer Asshole is no longer a problem.

Years ago, squirrels did hundreds of dollars of damage in my front & back yard. I don't have that problem any more - the occasional curious grey-tailed lookie-loo gets a humane death and a swift burial. On occasion, I harvest the tail, as the fur is useful for making brushes used by folks that illuminate documents, to handle gold leaf. The meat's no good - doesn't taste right.

Our dog usually kills 2 or 4 chipmunks a summer. For the life of me I can't catch on to how she's fast enough get them.

Anticipatory hunting tactics. Cat does the same thing - take it head on, guess which way it's going to dart, and they practically leap to you. The decision tree of a fleeing chipmunk isn't that complex.

FormlessOne: bim1154: FormlessOne: I don't have a squirrel problem. I do have an air rifle and pointy little hunting pellets, however. A .177 to the rib cage or head, and B'rer Asshole is no longer a problem.

Years ago, squirrels did hundreds of dollars of damage in my front & back yard. I don't have that problem any more - the occasional curious grey-tailed lookie-loo gets a humane death and a swift burial. On occasion, I harvest the tail, as the fur is useful for making brushes used by folks that illuminate documents, to handle gold leaf. The meat's no good - doesn't taste right.

Our dog usually kills 2 or 4 chipmunks a summer. For the life of me I can't catch on to how she's fast enough get them.

Anticipatory hunting tactics. Cat does the same thing - take it head on, guess which way it's going to dart, and they practically leap to you. The decision tree of a fleeing chipmunk isn't that complex.

Well she sure has it figured out. What a chipmunk murderer looks like in my profile.

bim1154: Trance750: bim1154: Dookie-chute: Just kill it with a bb gun, this is why Canada will never rule the world.

Canada gave us Justin Bieber and Nickleback. Their pecking order was in the toilet long ago.

And Celine Deon

There's too many Gay Farkers here that like her. I didn't want to stir things up.

And I'm sorry, but Shania Twain is NOT Country

if you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge a squirrel

Because when a man stores another man's seed in his cheeks, he makes a pact.

Trance750: bim1154: Trance750: bim1154: Dookie-chute: Just kill it with a bb gun, this is why Canada will never rule the world.

Canada gave us Justin Bieber and Nickleback. Their pecking order was in the toilet long ago.

And Celine Deon

There's too many Gay Farkers here that like her. I didn't want to stir things up.

And I'm sorry, but Shania Twain is NOT Country

1650 fps pellet gun will end your worries.

I remember sitting on my second floor patio eating pistachios one day. I threw one down to a squirrel and watched him just gobble it up. I wonder what he/she was thinking when it ate it. Wth is this! This is GOOD!
/no no squirrel, you just get one.

I don't understand people's reticence about killing squirrels. My grandpa sold his farm to a real estate developer and moved into the first new house he'd ever lived in across town. He became the neighborhood exterminator and shot everything he came across. His neighbors could never figure out who was setting off firecrackers and never connected it to the rapid elimination of the marauding vermin which they attributed to the pet population which only survived because he shot the bobcats and coyotes.

Mock26: Trance750: bim1154: Trance750: bim1154: Dookie-chute: Just kill it with a bb gun, this is why Canada will never rule the world.

Canada gave us Justin Bieber and Nickleback. Their pecking order was in the toilet long ago.

And Celine Deon

There's too many Gay Farkers here that like her. I didn't want to stir things up.

And I'm sorry, but Shania Twain is NOT Country

[img.photobucket.com image 15x17]

Not many are these days. It all sounds like pop.

Trance750: bim1154: Dookie-chute: Just kill it with a bb gun, this is why Canada will never rule the world.

Canada gave us Justin Bieber and Nickleback. Their pecking order was in the toilet long ago.

And Celine Deon

You say "gave us", I say "ran out".

Snakeophelia: As someone who just finished pouring red pepper flakes into the bird feeder - supposedly squirrels hate that but birds don't notice - I'm getting a real kick out of this discussion. Our squirrel gang has a clear leader, White Tail, who doesn't even run when our car pulls into the driveway

That is the whole point of capsaicin for the pepper plant. Mammalian mouths have receptors that recognize it but birds don't. Birds also don't digest the vital parts of the seed. It passes through and is pooped out somewhere else. Voila! propagation for the pepper plant.

Boss Bailey has a squirrel problem. They only die once.

This works wonders for me:

lol @ airgun thread

Chip monks are dangerous!! I was bitten by a CM when I was 11 & have never fully recovered!!

bim1154: Mock26: Trance750: bim1154: Trance750: bim1154: Dookie-chute: Just kill it with a bb gun, this is why Canada will never rule the world.

Canada gave us Justin Bieber and Nickleback. Their pecking order was in the toilet long ago.

And Celine Deon

There's too many Gay Farkers here that like her. I didn't want to stir things up.

And I'm sorry, but Shania Twain is NOT Country

[img.photobucket.com image 15x17]

Not many are these days. It all sounds like pop.

Music changes and evolves. Look at early Rock 'n Roll. Much of what we call Rock today does not sound all that much like what we originally called Rock.

Is this the thread where I display my "Apex Predator Weapons" and gloat about the stopping power of a super douchey hopped up B.B. gun?
/hurrr durrrr but my prize winnin strawberries hurrrr hummm nowww
/When you ITG rodents and their nature
the terrur wins...