FTFA: According to prosecutors, Tom Edwards said that when his wife refused to get out of bed, he left to smoke a cigarette, returned to the room and shot her four times.

Look at that - smoking does cause death.

Roy Batty (RoyBatty)
So did he end up going car shopping or what?! I hate when they only write half the story.

HA!

Holy shiat. I finally got a headline greenlit.

Wife arguing with you about a new car? That's a shootin

/ftfy

jayphat: Holy shiat. I finally got a headline not about Florida greenlit.

Kudos - you did it the hard way!

jayphat: Holy shiat. I finally got a headline greenlit.

Oh. Try some of these on finally: Subby your headline sucks in content, grammar, and humor, your mother is a whore, and I don't like you because fark you that's why. You sound fat.

bukketmaster: Wife arguing with you about a new car? That's a shootin

/ftfy

Came here to do that.

Wait a minute, I know a lot of states don't even allow the sale of a car on a Sunday, you're telling me Ohio does? I find that hard to believe...

Just standin' his ground like a good murican.

jayphat: Holy shiat. I finally got a headline greenlit.

PROTIP: Figure out what all the old, massively overused headline jokes are and shoehorn whatever article you're reading into them. Works every time.

Example: Person does rational but totally out of character thing. Just kidding, he actually did insane and totally in character thing.

What the f*ck was she doing outside the kitchen?

/b*tch, that's not how you make a sammich!

dookdookdook: Just standin' his ground like a good murican.

jayphat: Holy shiat. I finally got a headline greenlit.

PROTIP: Figure out what all the old, massively overused headline jokes are and shoehorn whatever article you're reading into them. Works every time.

Example: Person does rational but totally out of character thing. Just kidding, he actually did insane and totally in character thing.

Also, try to use PROTIP:.
Nobody will understand the educational value unless you use PROTIP.

Nice to see Gahanna PD actually made itself useful for once...

/Yeah, it's a speedtrap
//No effing way Morrison should be a 25

In his defense, I'm sure the car was better looking...and a better ride...

ladyfortuna: Wait a minute, I know a lot of states don't even allow the sale of a car on a Sunday, you're telling me Ohio does? I find that hard to believe...

No, but the lots are usually pretty busy because there are no creepy car salesman around to pester the hell out of you.

Hot Carl To Go: jayphat: Holy shiat. I finally got a headline greenlit.

Oh. Try some of these on finally: Subby your headline sucks in content, grammar, and humor, your mother is a whore, and I don't like you because fark you that's why. You sound fat.

But I'm 6'3" and 142lbs, the very definition of NOT fat.
/i understand the reference
//TY for the compliment

One of the Columbus news stations played the 911 tapes of this guy. It's chilling. He was probably going to kill her over this or a peanut butter sandwich. Either way, she was doomed.

KeelingLovesCornholes: One of the Columbus news stations played the 911 tapes of this guy. It's chilling. He was probably going to kill her over this or a peanut butter sandwich. Either way, she was doomed.

Did she died?

Honestly people, if you positively must shoot your wife don't do it while she is on the bed. Where will you sleep? Everyone is aware of how important it is keep a mattress dry.

Luckily the wife-to-be and I won't be having this argument. We've already agreed that I get a Mustang if she gets a Prius.

/together we'll average 30 mpg!