For that kind of cash, it better include a front rub.

For that kind of cash she should live with you for a month, inclusive.

I accept her offer of $75,000 and a back rub. EIP

I can't decide which would be better.

Her rubbing my back or me rubbing hers.

I insist on wardrobe approval for both of us.

$75000 for 5 seconds of disappointment? I'm in

Is it a reverse massage?

Better offer, before Seal's approval you get.

For that kind of money it better include a prostate massage and a "happy ending".

I'd definitely go full Travolta during that back rub.

For that kind of money, she'd better be wearing her fleshless Halloween costume.


....what?

He wasn't actually expecting to win the bid.

Put her in a football uniform, send in John Travolta and let's see what happens.

LeroyBourne: Put her in a football uniform, send in John Travolta and let's see what happens.

One with all the cushions & pads for the americans or a real football uniform?

BumpInTheNight: Better offer, before Seal's approval you get.

Call me racist if you like, but knowing hes wrecked that tons of times just turns me off.

Archer - yups and nopes

Sultan Of Herf: BumpInTheNight: Better offer, before Seal's approval you get.

Call me racist if you like, but knowing hes wrecked that tons of times just turns me off.

Because he's black or because he's well Seal?

If she had been wrecked many times by Denzell Washington would it bother you?

How much for her to star in my own private yogurt commercial?

How much for a mouth hug?

Tyrosine: For that kind of money it better include a prostate massage and a "happy ending".

I wouldn't so much expect her to provide the happy ending...but rather at least not be offended that it happens all by itself.

For that kind of money she had better start doing her kegels.

BumpInTheNight: LeroyBourne: Put her in a football uniform, send in John Travolta and let's see what happens.

One with all the cushions & pads for the americans or a real football uniform?

Perhaps the synchronized grass divers should wear some sort of padding. Then maybe there wouldn't be so many grievous injuries as they jump on the ground.

For $1,000 can I just massage myself within ten feet of a nude Heidi Klum?

Hi Heidi, I heard you broke up with Seal and I'd like a chance to date you. My name is Polar Bear.

Haha, Weinstein should just pack it in. The 90s are coming back but without him.

will the winnar donate the backrub to someone dying of AIDS?

How much for handy? I could go as much $3.50. $4 tops.

FBSM with a happy ending

Doesn't it give you a warm and fuzzy feeling to know that the rich still have enough money for shait like this?

How much for Kate Upton to massage my back using her tits?

fusillade762: [s3.amazonaws.com image 200x200]

Archer - yups and nopes

Came for Archer reference left satisfied.

/Sploosh!

skinink: For $1,000 can I just massage myself within ten feet of a nude Heidi Klum?
Hi Heidi, I heard you broke up with Seal and I'd like a chance to date you. My name is Polar Bear Walrus.

FTFM

^{you know, the next size up}

Damn for $75k it better include a BBBJ.

What part of her anatomy will she be rubbing you down with?

or 500 blowjobs from divine brown, guaranteed no spitting.

$75K for a back rub?!?!? For that kinda money there better be some tijuana donkey porn involved or at least let me eat peanut butter out of her butt

He doesn't want the back rub, he just wants to run up Darrell.

i wouldn't mind rubbing one out onto her back

Funbags: [i.imgur.com image 300x400]

[i286.photobucket.com image 600x358]

Thank you...
She was the hottest woman on the planet....about 10 years ago. But age catches up to all of us eventually...

/still pretty darn hot

I'd give her a high bid, if ya know what I mean, and I think you do.

Funbags: [i.imgur.com image 300x400]

[i286.photobucket.com image 600x358]

Umm...wouldn't getting a back rub mean you wouldn't have to see her face.

If I had enough money where I would be able to spend $75,000 for something like that, I probably wouldn't have to spend $75,000 for something like that.

Let's stop with the silly bids and kick it up to FIVE MILLION!

ArkAngel: BumpInTheNight: LeroyBourne: Put her in a football uniform, send in John Travolta and let's see what happens.

One with all the cushions & pads for the americans or a real football uniform?

Perhaps the synchronized grass divers should wear some sort of padding. Then maybe there wouldn't be so many grievous injuries as they jump on the ground.

That's hillarious! I can't stand soccer/football because of the shameful injury faking these 'athletes' indulge in. Any other sport, and you'd be shunned for pussy behaviour like that. I think they save all the overly agressive manly behaviour for the fan riots.

Oldiron_79: Sultan Of Herf: BumpInTheNight: Better offer, before Seal's approval you get.

Call me racist if you like, but knowing hes wrecked that tons of times just turns me off.

Because he's black or because he's well Seal?

If she had been wrecked many times by Denzell Washington would it bother you?

Possibly, but in case of a "where shes been" mental flash Id rather it be Denzel than Seal...

ActionJoe: Funbags: [i.imgur.com image 300x400]

[i286.photobucket.com image 600x358]

Umm...wouldn't getting a back rub mean you wouldn't have to see her face.

Is there some running joke on Fark where men pretend to have ridiculously, insane standards in women? If you honestly classify Heidi Klum's face as "unslightly", then I would switch suggest you switch up your lifestyle. Hell, I know gay dudes who have enough common sense to accept any sexual offers from a female of this stature/notoriety. There must be something more sinister at play here.

/I'd hit it for the story only (like many many celebrities)
//if not just for the sake of getting laid by a woman who's not ugly or fat

Sultan Of Herf: BumpInTheNight: Better offer, before Seal's approval you get.

Call me racist if you like, but knowing hes wrecked that tons of times just turns me off.

I wouldn't say racist, just yet. If you are implying Seal's penis has somehow mangled her vagina, then I'd have to say you are an idiot that should stop thinking about big black dongs. Again.... I said "if"

/ Lady parts definitely do not work that way.
// Either way, stop thinking about big black dongs
/// Again.... "if"

$75,000?! For charity?!

I'M IN.

/For a good cause
//for the bragging rights
///Yeah, I'll lie about it...and?

Is Dave Hestor the subby?

Mind of the North Star: If you honestly classify Heidi Klum's face as "unslightly", then I would switch suggest you switch up your lifestyle.

I like her face...it's one of the prettiest I've ever come across.