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Video  Alex, I'll take "Things found in people's butts" for $100

29 May 2012 11:22 AM   |   7387 clicks   |   YouTube
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basemetal    [TotalFark]  
Worthless without pics.....

29 May 2012 10:03 AM
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Mentat    [TotalFark]  
Should have used an anal bum cover.

29 May 2012 10:26 AM
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Grables'Daughter     
A sexologist?

29 May 2012 10:33 AM
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Cythraul    [TotalFark]  
What is 'the rough trick I picked up last weekend?' Alex.

29 May 2012 10:56 AM
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Theaetetus     
wat wat

29 May 2012 11:25 AM
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Krumet     
Wow, she's really packed on some LBs.

29 May 2012 11:29 AM
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Linux_Yes     
i wish someone would put mitt romney in their butt.

29 May 2012 11:31 AM
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LeroyBourne     
Strangely 'huge erect cack' missing from the list.
/someone needs to show this to santorum so his head will explode.

29 May 2012 11:36 AM
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Herb_the_betta     
A light bulb? Really? Was it still intact?

29 May 2012 11:41 AM
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Slam Dunkz     
upload.wikimedia.org

Disagrees

29 May 2012 11:43 AM
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factoryconnection    [TotalFark]  
She kept saying "I'm not saying you should, but somebody did" put this in their butt. What she should be saying is "I'm not judging, but all of these objects have required an ER visit to extract."

Although the hairbrush surprised me... assuming it was handle first, it sorta has the correct profile with the flared head to stop a depth excursion. Unless, and this is pretty gnarly, the bristles got in and effectively acted as barbs, preventing extraction.

Yowza.

29 May 2012 11:54 AM
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Herb_the_betta     
factoryconnection: She kept saying "I'm not saying you should, but somebody did" put this in their butt. What she should be saying is "I'm not judging, but all of these objects have required an ER visit to extract."

Although the hairbrush surprised me... assuming it was handle first, it sorta has the correct profile with the flared head to stop a depth excursion. Unless, and this is pretty gnarly, the bristles got in and effectively acted as barbs, preventing extraction.

Yowza.


I've had hair brushes that lost the handle through intended use. I can see that as entirely possible.

29 May 2012 12:02 PM
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Lor M. Ipsum    [TotalFark]  
LeroyBourne: Strangely 'huge erect cack' missing from the list.

She was trying advocate a list of items that do *not* go in the butt

29 May 2012 12:07 PM
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reverend maynard     
A video truly worthy of FARK.

29 May 2012 12:13 PM
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LesserEvil    [TotalFark]  
Let's get all these out of the way....

img1.fark.net Tag on vacation today?

She's a sex educator, and she thinks a Mrs. Buttersworth syrup bottle is a remarkable object to have been inserted in somebody's ass?

lastly, why didn't her list include "50 condoms filled with heroin?"

29 May 2012 12:27 PM
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toddism     
i just do not get the whole "things in my ass" or "things in my wife's ass" or "things in my girlfriend's ass" thing. . including my pecker, by the way. isn't that what her hoo haw is for?

29 May 2012 12:28 PM
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Lor M. Ipsum    [TotalFark]  
LesserEvil: lastly, why didn't her list include "50 condoms filled with heroin?"

That's hardly unique, as opposed to, say, a bottle of Mrs. Butterworth

Maybe I'm the crazy one, but that's the first time I've heard of that being used for this sort of thing.

29 May 2012 12:34 PM
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wippit     
No drilldo?
No baseball bat?

29 May 2012 12:38 PM
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GonzoNihilist     
3.bp.blogspot.com

/approves

29 May 2012 12:43 PM
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Herb_the_betta     
img510.imageshack.us

29 May 2012 12:44 PM
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LesserEvil    [TotalFark]  
Lor M. Ipsum: LesserEvil: lastly, why didn't her list include "50 condoms filled with heroin?"

That's hardly unique, as opposed to, say, a bottle of Mrs. Butterworth

Maybe I'm the crazy one, but that's the first time I've heard of that being used for this sort of thing.


Well, her whole schtick was "things not to put in your butt", so I'd think condoms filled with heroin would be on the list.

As for the Mrs. Buttersworth, it is unusual, but as I said, why is she shocked by it? I've lived long enough to be witness to some crazy things, things I'd prefer to forget... I wouldn't be surprised if they had to remove a small watermelon from somebody's ass. I would be willing to bet (though I'd prefer NOT to see it myself) there are more than a few individuals who could take that bottle in their ass without even touching the rim going in. Even with a tighter entry, (now that I have unfortunately had to think about it), I imagine the contents off that bottle could have been used to make things easier.

If people buy this sort of thing (NSFW) and are able to use it (just do the unsafe GIS yourself), how remarkable, really, is a Mrs. Buttersworth bottle?

I personally can't understand the fascination people have with stretching that part of the body out like that. I'd hate to be 80+ years old with an ass that opens to the size of a coffee can. I'd prefer not to have to wear diapers most of my life.

29 May 2012 12:47 PM
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Jim from Saint Paul     
toddism: her hoo haw

That place that bleeds for a week once a month or so? Gaping wound farking FTW!

Srsly, I am all about anything if it's properly cleaned and she's at all into it.

29 May 2012 01:15 PM
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Lor M. Ipsum    [TotalFark]  
Yeah, in retrospect, the banana and zucchini are pretty cliche.

Still, the Mrs. Butterworth got a chortle out of me.

29 May 2012 01:15 PM
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Brick-House     
Linux_Yes: i wish someone would put mitt romney in their butt.

really can't do that until Obama is finished farking us all in the ass

29 May 2012 01:17 PM
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Brick-House     
I wonder why there was...

rlv.zcache.com

29 May 2012 01:18 PM
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Kazahmish     
was the condom on the banana ribbed for his or her pleasure?

29 May 2012 01:49 PM
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RoyBatty     
Others have told me to remove my head from my ass, so I'm not going to pass judgment.

29 May 2012 02:05 PM
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roosam     
"Oh no mom, not ass soup again!!!!"

29 May 2012 02:19 PM
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Linux_Yes     
Brick-House: Linux_Yes: i wish someone would put mitt romney in their butt.

really can't do that until Obama is finished farking us all in the ass



if you think Obama is cornholing you then Mitt Rmoney by comparison is going to pile drive your ass. unless you're wealthy, of course. if that's the case, enjoy your tax cuts and other perks coming your way.

29 May 2012 02:24 PM
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AbiNormal     
Ribbed for his/her pleasure?
www.boronisalumi.it

29 May 2012 02:52 PM
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Serial     
LesserEvil: I would be willing to bet (though I'd prefer NOT to see it myself) there are more than a few individuals who could take that bottle in their ass without even touching the rim going in.

The site I work for has a "hard" section for it's members. Let's just say you'd be making a safe bet.

29 May 2012 02:59 PM
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stonelotus     
she had me at ass soup.

29 May 2012 03:06 PM
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AiryAnne     
farm8.staticflickr.com

obscure?

29 May 2012 03:09 PM
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Iggie     
You've got a friend in me...

assets.nydailynews.com

29 May 2012 03:10 PM
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FatalDischarge     
Ryan Dunn unavailable for comment.

29 May 2012 03:21 PM
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factoryconnection    [TotalFark]  
Herb_the_betta: I've had hair brushes that lost the handle through intended use. I can see that as entirely possible.

Good point; my wife's hairbrush snapped clean apart at the handle/brush union recently. I can see that would be an unpleasant surprise for the erotic MacGyver.

Serial: LesserEvil: I would be willing to bet (though I'd prefer NOT to see it myself) there are more than a few individuals who could take that bottle in their ass without even touching the rim going in.

The site I work for has a "hard" section for it's members. Let's just say you'd be making a safe bet.


From what I've heard out of ER workers, it is not so much the size of the object sometimes, but the vacuum lock that forms once it is in. A wine bottle put in, neck first (obviously?) without a cork could produce a vacuum that would necessitate a relief being introduced prior to removal.

Thinking ahead: a vent hole drilled in the bottom of the bottle
Reacting to unplanned uh-oh: a vent tube inserted past it

29 May 2012 03:23 PM
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PooPooUndies     
Can you put a boogie in your butt?

29 May 2012 04:05 PM
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Revek    [TotalFark]  
I not saying your should, but?

/ass

29 May 2012 04:14 PM
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TrainingWheelsNeeded     
AiryAnne: [farm8.staticflickr.com image 435x212]

obscure?


iraqi ass map!

29 May 2012 04:33 PM
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DeltaPunch     
factoryconnection: A wine bottle put in, neck first (obviously?) without a cork could produce a vacuum that would necessitate a relief being introduced prior to removal.

Unless your goal was to pull out her ovaries like a cork from a wine bottle. Oh the delicious irony in using a wine bottle for that.... who's the bottle and who's the cork NOW, b*tch?!?

29 May 2012 05:11 PM
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Ghastly    [TotalFark]  
What what?!

29 May 2012 05:36 PM
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Zombalupagus     
And I'll bet 95% of them said at the emergency room: "I accidentally slipped and fell on it."

I know a guy who used to work at the E.R. and he said there was a guy with two potatoes up his butt. His excuse? You guessed it. He slipped and fell. Twice.

/lol'd at the two jars of vaseline. "YOUR DOING IT WRONG."

29 May 2012 05:45 PM
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Explodo     
I'll bet she's fun.

29 May 2012 05:51 PM
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hogans     
cdn.counter-currents.com

29 May 2012 06:18 PM
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factoryconnection    [TotalFark]  
Zombalupagus: And I'll bet 95% of them said at the emergency room: "I accidentally slipped and fell on it."

I know a guy who used to work at the E.R. and he said there was a guy with two potatoes up his butt. His excuse? You guessed it. He slipped and fell. Twice.

/lol'd at the two jars of vaseline. "YOUR DOING IT WRONG."


There is an elegant and truthful response that would work and also end the embarrassing conversation for both parties in that case:

Doctor: "how did that end up in there?"
Patient: "umm... use?"
Doctor: "okay, that's plenty for a work-up, let's get this thing out."

29 May 2012 07:12 PM
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skepticultist     
factoryconnection: She kept saying "I'm not saying you should, but somebody did" put this in their butt. What she should be saying is "I'm not judging, but all of these objects have required an ER visit to extract."

Although the hairbrush surprised me... assuming it was handle first, it sorta has the correct profile with the flared head to stop a depth excursion. Unless, and this is pretty gnarly, the bristles got in and effectively acted as barbs, preventing extraction.

Yowza.


It was a hairbrush handle, so I'm guessing that the person who stuck this up their butt was thinking along the same lines you are, but then (surprise!) the handle came off when they tried to pull it back out.

29 May 2012 07:37 PM
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factoryconnection    [TotalFark]  
skepticultist: It was a hairbrush handle, so I'm guessing that the person who stuck this up their butt was thinking along the same lines you are, but then (surprise!) the handle came off when they tried to pull it back out.

Clearly something went terribly not-to-plan, so you're probably right.

29 May 2012 08:42 PM
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jimmiejaz     
Grables'Daughter: A sexologist?

A sexologist is someone concerned with the scholarly investigation of human sexuality, from normal sexual development to sexual pathologies such as sexual abuse. The field of sexology is highly interdisciplinary, incorporating knowledge from a number of academic pursuits, and sexologists can work in a range of settings. Some sexologists are primarily interested in conducting studies and clinical trials to understand more about human sexuality, for example, while others offer therapy to people with sexual dysfunction, drawing upon their sexology experience to help people.

Some notable researchers in the field include Alfred Kinsey, author of the notorious Kinsey Reports, along with William Masters and Virginia Johnson.

http://www.wisegeek.com/what-does-a-s exologist-do.htm

29 May 2012 09:03 PM
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puppetmaster745     
I propose a new drinking game:

Drink until she'shiattable.

/speaking of ER visits

29 May 2012 09:12 PM
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Caluth     
Work at a hospital. I have seen a mason jar, and 2 umbrellas on two different guys about a week apart. first dude died from perforation.

If its not made to go up there don't do it!

29 May 2012 09:25 PM
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