looks like a dildo

I'm so confused.

FTA: "Olympic Wenlock plod cops condemnation from Amazon wags"

What language do they speak in Great Britain???

I'm a bit on the sleepy side, but from the get-go that article filled my mind full of f*ck up to capacity levels... the picture took it to new levels.

Subby's headline did try to warn me, vaguely.

kvinesknows: looks like a dildo

Authoritarian dildo is watching you masturbate.



Also:

It must be required by the IOC that all Olympic mascots must be the weirdest farking creatures you can possibly imagine.

It's like 1984 had a marketing blitz by someone who didn't read the whole book.

I loves me some Internet. Some incredibly funny writers out there, that I would never get to meet, or enjoy their writing without the Intertubes. And the Three Wolves stuff always slays me....

It's like the Combine are trying to look more British.

Cant ever beat Springy the Springfield spring.

Ok, I totally wasn't expecting that line to actually be in the article.

WhippingBoy: FTA: "Olympic Wenlock plod cops condemnation from Amazon wags"

What language do they speak in Great Britain???


Avi: "Blagged"? Tony, speak English. I thought this country spawned the farking language, and so far nobody seems to speak it.

They must be big fans of De Blob.

/hot

What is it with these Olympics people? Remember the '96 Olympic Sperm?

Was that words?

WhippingBoy: Olympic Wenlock plod cops condemnation from Amazon wags

Google translate gives me "I Venlokk police surrounding the Olympics in the Amazon". I had to run it through a few other languages to be sure.

Olympic Wenlock plod cops condemnation from Amazon wags

I swear I knew how to read yesterday.

What ya got there are some nouns, prepositions, and some other types of speech I caint recognize.

Seem to be in no particular order.

Welcome to the London Olympics. This space alien in a bobby uniform will now take a DNA sample and monitor you. Don't worry, he's friendly. Honest.

Olympic Wenlock plod cops condemnation from Amazon wags.

Right. Challenge accepted.

Wenlock is apparently the name of the mascot.
'Plod' is short for 'PC Plod' - a policeman in a kid's book, so it's a slang term for a policeman.
Cops in this context means 'elicits' (e.g. cop a feel). It is presumably being used for comedic effect.
a wag is a joker.

So we get

Olympic mascot called Wenlock, a policeman, elicits condemnation from people who write jokey reviews on Amazon.

It's in a long tradition of amusing British headlines, such as 'British push bottles up Germans', 'Monty flies back to front' etc.
It's a pretty poor example.

"Olympic Wenlock plod cops condemnation from Amazon wags"

I think someone just threw some random words together in no particular order here.

Tillmaster: Olympic Wenlock plod cops condemnation from Amazon wags.

Right. Challenge accepted.

Wenlock is apparently the name of the mascot.
'Plod' is short for 'PC Plod' - a policeman in a kid's book, so it's a slang term for a policeman.
Cops in this context means 'elicits' (e.g. cop a feel). It is presumably being used for comedic effect.
a wag is a joker.

So we get

Olympic mascot called Wenlock, a policeman, elicits condemnation from people who write jokey reviews on Amazon.

It's in a long tradition of amusing British headlines, such as 'British push bottles up Germans', 'Monty flies back to front' etc.
It's a pretty poor example.

I detect a deficiency in superfluous letter "u".

/Flowers Honour their colours.
// Prats push punters in prams.
/// Boffins for all.

lisarenee3505: "Olympic Wenlock plod cops condemnation from Amazon wags"

I think someone just threw some random words together in no particular order here.

I'm pretty sure the Brits are just farking with us at this point, trying to see how far they can go before we catch on. They don't understand it either, they're just using an OED and a handful of 20 sided dice.

Oh yeah, the Olympic penis. I had forgotten about that thing.

That doesn't look at all like a dildo. It looks like one of those vibrating bullets that women...

er...

use to massage their necks. Yeah, that's the ticket.

Still better than that one Vancouver mascot...

Olympic Wenlock plod cops condemnation from Amazon wags

......whut?

Dumb-Ass-Monkey: Olympic Wenlock plod cops condemnation from Amazon wags

......whut?

i thought that reading TFA would clear things up.

i was wrong

I'm more confused now than when I started.

Olympic Wenlock plod cops condemnation from Amazon wags




The fark am I reading?


I understand 3 of those words by themselves...but the sentance as a whole has me confused.

Lisa: I know those words, but that sign makes no sense.

"Olympic Wenlock plod cops condemnation from Amazon wags"

It's called "word salad", usually seen only the most severe cases of schizophrenia. Thought processes are so disjointed that speech appears as random words not associated in any discernable way to one another.

Sad, really.

No. It's called colloquialisms (with a dash of slang).
& those words don't get red lines under them when you type them. Provided you have English (UK) spellcheck enabled.
If you can find that setting, of course ;o)

"Olympic Wenlock plod cops condemnation from Amazon wags"

Quite easy to understand if you know how the English express themselves and what they are trying to express. There was even a "Crikey", crikey. I am a little concerned the permanently 8 year old Lisa Simpson has outed herself masturbating on international "news" media.

The.... Worst.... Olympic.... Mascots.... Ever!

EMCGuy: WhippingBoy: FTA: "Olympic Wenlock plod cops condemnation from Amazon wags"

What language do they speak in Great Britain???


Avi: "Blagged"? Tony, speak English. I thought this country spawned the farking language, and so far nobody seems to speak it.

That is English. It isn't our fault if you lot don't speak the language as well as you believe you do.

Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...... what?

These need to be featured as murderous aliens in a special 2012-Olympics-related episode of Doctor Who. They've got that right mix of creepiness and absurdity.

/Tonight, on a very special Doctor Who...