I'd interrogate her.

You have the right to remain...sexy!

(Cue bad 70's porn music)

Even after ten hours there's still no sex in the interrogation room

I've been around this block twice now. Looking for something. A clue. I've been looking for clues and something led me back here. Yeah. So here I am. It could have been me, the one who was at Ringo's place when the shiat went down. Hey. I know how it is. I've been there. We've all done bad things. We've all had those guilty feelings in our heart. I'm going to take your brain out of your head and wash it and scrub it and make it clean. I don't know. But I'm going to have to settle this. First we're going to check the hole and see what we can find. We're going to get nice and wet, and you're going to spread your legs. Oh, that's good. So you know me. You know my reputation. Thirteen inches of tough load, I don't treat you gently. That's right. I'm Brock Landers. So I'm going to be nice. So I'm going to be nice. So I'm going to be nice, I'm going to ask you one more time. Where the fark is Ringo?

Pocket Ninja: I've been around this block twice now. Looking for something. A clue. I've been looking for clues and something led me back here. Yeah. So here I am. It could have been me, the one who was at Ringo's place when the shiat went down. Hey. I know how it is. I've been there. We've all done bad things. We've all had those guilty feelings in our heart. I'm going to take your brain out of your head and wash it and scrub it and make it clean. I don't know. But I'm going to have to settle this. First we're going to check the hole and see what we can find. We're going to get nice and wet, and you're going to spread your legs. Oh, that's good. So you know me. You know my reputation. Thirteen inches of tough load, I don't treat you gently. That's right. I'm Brock Landers. So I'm going to be nice. So I'm going to be nice. So I'm going to be nice, I'm going to ask you one more time. Where the fark is Ringo?

That was mesmerizing. And fairly easy to masturbate to.

Okay, not this is like three or four stripper threads that are greenlit between today and yesterday?

What is this, a Grables'Daughter holiday?

Elvis_Bogart: You have the right to remain...sexy!

(Cue bad 70's porn music)

Pocket Ninja: I've been around this block twice now. Looking for something. A clue. I've been looking for clues and something led me back here. Yeah. So here I am. It could have been me, the one who was at Ringo's place when the shiat went down. Hey. I know how it is. I've been there. We've all done bad things. We've all had those guilty feelings in our heart. I'm going to take your brain out of your head and wash it and scrub it and make it clean. I don't know. But I'm going to have to settle this. First we're going to check the hole and see what we can find. We're going to get nice and wet, and you're going to spread your legs. Oh, that's good. So you know me. You know my reputation. Thirteen inches of tough load, I don't treat you gently. That's right. I'm Brock Landers. So I'm going to be nice. So I'm going to be nice. So I'm going to be nice, I'm going to ask you one more time. Where the fark is Ringo?

That's from one of my all-time favorite movies.

and found her tied up with napkins

What?

I mean, I can't picture her restraints being napkins, so I'm picturing her tied up with rope or something... next to some napkins.

Not sure why that's an important detail.

I'll bet the two stiffs who grilled her...were. And they both wanted to be "bad cop" that day.

"Police were called to the Omni William Penn Hotel because guests heard 26-year-old Claudia Manrique screaming and found her tied up with napkins."

No kidding. So what was her stage name, then? "Jane Smith?"

Must be from out of town. No blue eye shadow.

Octomom?

Grables'Daughter: Okay, not this is like three or four stripper threads that are greenlit between today and yesterday?

What is this, a Grables'Daughter holiday?

Is this a federal holiday or one where I still have to work?

I'd beat her with my night stick if you know what I mean, and I think you do

That was worth the click.

Ooh. Exotic and proud of her Native American heritage.

Mr. Coffee Nerves: Even after ten hours there's still no sex in the interrogation room

johnny law even blocks his own cock

You probably got raped.

AverageAmericanGuy: Ooh. Exotic and proud of her Native American heritage.

That's not Elizabeth Warren...

AverageAmericanGuy

Ooh. Exotic and proud of her Native American heritage.

Strippajawea, if you will

Tied up with napkins?

MaxxLarge: I'll bet the two stiffs who grilled her...were. And they both wanted to be "bad cop" that day.

"Police were called to the Omni William Penn Hotel because guests heard 26-year-old Claudia Manrique screaming and found her tied up with napkins."

No kidding. So what was her stage name, then? "Jane Smith?"

This is the same hotel that a year ago had a suspicious fire where the fire department found a dead guy in a chair. With a ventilated skull.

In other news, visit beautiful Philadelphia!

KrispyKritter: Mr. Coffee Nerves: Even after ten hours there's still no sex in the interrogation room

johnny law even blocks his own cock

May not apply in Philly. See vice squad members arrested for rape.

MaxxLarge: I'll bet the two stiffs who grilled her...were. And they both wanted to be "bad cop" that day.

"Police were called to the Omni William Penn Hotel because guests heard 26-year-old Claudia Manrique screaming and found her tied up with napkins."

Key word.

This text is now purple: MaxxLarge: I'll bet the two stiffs who grilled her...were. And they both wanted to be "bad cop" that day.

"Police were called to the Omni William Penn Hotel because guests heard 26-year-old Claudia Manrique screaming and found her tied up with napkins."

No kidding. So what was her stage name, then? "Jane Smith?"

This is the same hotel that a year ago had a suspicious fire where the fire department found a dead guy in a chair. With a ventilated skull.

In other news, visit beautiful Philadelphia!

That'll teach me to read. Same chain and hotel name; different city.

Yes, napkins. The larger cloth ones.

Christ, it's like you guys never tied up a gal on short notice.

busy chillin': AverageAmericanGuy

Ooh. Exotic and proud of her Native American heritage.

Strippajawea, if you will

Dear Lord...........that is perfect

busy chillin': AverageAmericanGuy

Ooh. Exotic and proud of her Native American heritage.

Strippajawea, if you will

Of the Slapaho tribe?

I would have sex with her, if you know what I mean.

After 10 hours the coke ran out.

The most popular cop at the 10-hour clothing-optional interrogation is the one who can carry two cups of coffee and a dozen donuts at the same time.

She looks like the girl who can eat the last donut.

That's a Manrique, baby!

Brick-House: I'd beat her with my night stick if you know what I mean, and I think you do

Channelling PizzaJedi?

WTF Indeed: Grables'Daughter: Okay, not this is like three or four stripper threads that are greenlit between today and yesterday?

What is this, a Grables'Daughter holiday?

Is this a federal holiday or one where I still have to work?

Flags at full mast?

busy chillin': AverageAmericanGuy

Ooh. Exotic and proud of her Native American heritage.

Strippajawea, if you will

Keyboard, coffee, etc.

WTF Indeed: Grables'Daughter: Okay, not this is like three or four stripper threads that are greenlit between today and yesterday?

What is this, a Grables'Daughter holiday?

Is this a federal holiday or one where I still have to work?

The crappy second one.

tallguywithglasseson: I mean, I can't picture her restraints being napkins, so I'm picturing her tied up with rope or something... next to some napkins.

Not sure why that's an important detail.

Cloth napkins, folks. Not paper, but cloth napkins.
"For want of a rope my stripper was lost"? I think not...

Grables'Daughter: Okay, not this is like three or four stripper threads that are greenlit between today and yesterday?

What is this, a Grables'Daughter holiday?

No, it's the 2nd Pittsburgh story in the queue.

Although, the first was about cows farking on the highway, so mixed blessing at best.

Odd Bird: Cloth napkins, folks. Not paper, but cloth napkins.
"For want of a rope my stripper was lost"? I think not...

I guess that makes sense, but even with a large cloth napkin, you'd think you'd be able to wriggle out of it.
I guess I've never tried tying someone up with those.

Napkins? All I need is a box of Kleenex.

great bod...but face looks like a tranny.

tallguywithglasseson: and found her tied up with napkins

What?

Shh . . . you're ruining my mood.

AverageAmericanGuy: Ooh. Exotic and proud of her Native American heritage.

Did Farkette Coyote Doyenne get into trouble?

A story about a Pittsburgh stripper and Roethlisberger's name wasn't mentioned? You're letting me down Pittsburgh.

ihatedumbpeople: great bod...but face looks like a tranny.

Hence the stage name "Manrique". It's right there so you know you're getting real t-girl goodness in every serving!

"Claudia Manrique" - well she's vaguely masculine, but I wouldn't say she reeks of man...

"guests heard 26-year-old Claudia Manrique screaming and found her tied up with napkins."

Now that IS clever... I mean, I can do one of these but I'm struggling to work out how I could tie anyone up with them...

"On or about the 3rd of May at 10:20 PM, exactly how sharp were your knees?"

This is what being tied up with napkins would look like:

Told ya!