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   Old and busted: Cabbage Patch Kids. New hotness: Cabbage Patch Kids

29 Jun 2012 03:49 AM   |   8825 clicks   |   The Sun
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NewportBarGuy    [TotalFark]  
Yer f*cking kidding me, right?

That sound you just heard was people who invested their life savings in beanie babies getting their hopes up.

28 Jun 2012 11:47 PM
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elleonheels    [TotalFark]  
My son had one of the originals, named Paxton Lloyd, Today, he's a grown up with no fear of expressing his emotions. If little girls learn how to be good mothers playing with dolls, where is the harm encouraging boys to do the same?

29 Jun 2012 01:14 AM
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NewportBarGuy    [TotalFark]  
elleonheels: My son had one of the originals, named Paxton Lloyd, Today, he's a grown up with no fear of expressing his emotions.

So, he's a choreographer? That's fantastic!


/Just kidding.

29 Jun 2012 01:27 AM
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FirstNationalBastard    [TotalFark]  
elleonheels: My son had one of the originals, named Paxton Lloyd, Today, he's a grown up with no fear of expressing his emotions. If little girls learn how to be good mothers playing with dolls, where is the harm encouraging boys to do the same?

edge-images.rifftrax.com

29 Jun 2012 01:32 AM
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elleonheels    [TotalFark]  
LOL.. he's retired from the Navy, strong as an ox and would gladly beat the snot out of all of you. If that didn't work, my Marine son would pitch in and help.

Yeah, still waiting for my medal for being a kickass mom. :/

29 Jun 2012 01:48 AM
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kmmontandon     
Let me know when Garbage Pail Kids are back in style.

I had every damned sticker for those, plastered all over my dresser when I was about 10.

29 Jun 2012 03:29 AM
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Rik01    [TotalFark]  
I hated those damn things when they first came out and I still hate the ugly little buggers today.

All they do is prove to me that most Americans who buy them have absolutely no taste.

29 Jun 2012 03:30 AM
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Slick Johnson     
@ elleonheels- No need to wait for your medal anymore. Thank the Supreme Court for that

29 Jun 2012 03:59 AM
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RayD8     
Cabbage patch kids.
Vegetarian Dingo fodder.

29 Jun 2012 04:11 AM
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rocky_howard     
Cabbage Patch Kids? Rubbish!

Gimme the Garbage Pail Kids!!

29 Jun 2012 04:17 AM
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Vaneshi     
So... how long until things like MASK & Robotix get a face lifting reimage and become "this Christmas's hottest toy"?

Considering how everything these days has to be "dark and gritty" I'm just waiting for Mattel (or whoever owns the brand) to put out 'crack whore barbie'.

/May not be totally kidding either.

29 Jun 2012 04:27 AM
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robohobo    [TotalFark]  
Vaneshi: 'crack whore barbie'.



blogs.colette.fr

29 Jun 2012 04:32 AM
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Jellee Bean     
i was 9 or 10 when they first came out... was more into dinky cars and rollerskates, but, i HAD to have one of these things. ended up with 2, a boy and a girl.

both, now, in a garbage bag in my basement. haven't seen them in about 12 years.

29 Jun 2012 04:39 AM
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KrispyKritter    [TotalFark]  
i recall the special Olympics model they had in the theme colors. OMG i never had such anxiety, being in a toy store and not being able to set those gaudy, ugly, tacky dolls on fire.

MIL had a Teddy Ruxpin she frickin loved. used to freak her out, spinning the eyes around and around.

29 Jun 2012 04:49 AM
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sjcousins     
I hated seeing these damn things when I was a kid. But anything is better than bratz.

29 Jun 2012 04:53 AM
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Apos    [TotalFark]  
The same toys that parents were willing to literally kill for in the '80s?

Ok then.

29 Jun 2012 04:57 AM
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Isildur     
Slap bracelets next?

/everything old is new again

29 Jun 2012 05:03 AM
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Vaneshi     
robohobo: Vaneshi: 'crack whore barbie'.



[blogs.colette.fr image 381x400]


Dear god tell me that isn't a real product... if it is please direct me towards the nearest escape shuttle. I no longer wish to live on this planet.

29 Jun 2012 05:10 AM
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tankjr     
elleonheels: LOL.. he's retired from the Navy, strong as an ox and would gladly beat the snot out of all of you. If that didn't work, my Marine son would pitch in and help.

Yeah, still waiting for my medal for being a kickass mom. :/


If that's the case then he is probably very out of touch with his emotions. Unless he derives glee from the pain of others, in which case, he's a psychopath.

Ya, keep waiting on that medal.

29 Jun 2012 05:17 AM
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TappingTheVein     

29 Jun 2012 06:02 AM
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AverageAmericanGuy     
Figures Satan would try this again with a Democrat President in office.

29 Jun 2012 06:22 AM
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sjcousins     
Wait, is it because cabbage patch dolls don't make our little fatties feel bad about their bodies like barbie did? For now at least...

29 Jun 2012 06:26 AM
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fisker     
i.imgur.com

Ima pound puppy kind of guy

29 Jun 2012 06:26 AM
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Guuberre     
I live about 70 miles south of Babyland General Hospital, where those damn things came from (the originals, at least). Those dolls look surprisingly like the local inbreds.

fayettewoman.com

Just shoot me.

29 Jun 2012 06:39 AM
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tommyl66     
Vaneshi: So... how long until things like MASK & Robotix get a face lifting reimage and become "this Christmas's hottest toy"?

Considering how everything these days has to be "dark and gritty" I'm just waiting for Mattel (or whoever owns the brand) to put out 'crack whore barbie'.

/May not be totally kidding either.


I prefer Gangsta biatch Barbie

/Swing battah, swing swing battah battah swing

29 Jun 2012 06:59 AM
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Noozletter     
NewportBarGuy: Yer f*cking kidding me, right?

That sound you just heard was people who invested their life savings in beanie babies getting their hopes up.


I'm surprised they didn't burn those to keep their trailers warm.

29 Jun 2012 07:04 AM
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Mock26     
Those who enjoy My Little Pony call themselves Bronies. So, what will the adult male fans of Cabbage Patch Kids call themselves?

29 Jun 2012 07:31 AM
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stucka     
The "hospital" is ... creepy, and impossible to describe.

29 Jun 2012 07:40 AM
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Isildur     
Mock26: Those who enjoy My Little Pony call themselves Bronies. So, what will the adult male fans of Cabbage Patch Kids call themselves?

"Bald-Patch Kids"?

29 Jun 2012 07:42 AM
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AverageAmericanGuy     
Mock26: Those who enjoy My Little Pony call themselves Bronies. So, what will the adult male fans of Cabbage Patch Kids call themselves?

C.P. Kollectors

29 Jun 2012 07:45 AM
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spentmiles     
Yeah, go ahead and buy your son one of these. But don't be surprised when he cuts a hole in the bottom of it.

29 Jun 2012 07:51 AM
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Jon iz teh kewl     
www.retro.net

29 Jun 2012 08:12 AM
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FirstNationalBastard    [TotalFark]  
spentmiles: Yeah, go ahead and buy your son one of these. But don't be surprised when he cuts a hole in the bottom of it.

If you buy one of the ones that "eats" when you stick something in its mouth, the need for cutting a hole in the bottom is decreased.

29 Jun 2012 08:14 AM
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PC LOAD LETTER    [TotalFark]  
Here's one!
images.sodahead.com

29 Jun 2012 08:14 AM
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Eps05     
I just realized every damn Sun article picture caption is

[ picture ]

Statement ... Actual description

That is all.

29 Jun 2012 08:15 AM
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Herr Morgenstern     
When I was a kid I begged my mother for one of these, but she refused because "dolls are for girls". Eventually she got me a My Buddy doll which, if you recall, looked a lot like Chuckie. I threw that thing in the closet and didn't touch it for a year. I think I ended up cutting all it's hair off, but that didn't make it look any less creepy.

So yeah, thanks for the gender role reinforcement, mom.

29 Jun 2012 08:31 AM
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spentmiles     
Herr Morgenstern: Eventually she got me a My Buddy doll which, if you recall, looked a lot like Chuckie. I threw that thing in the closet and didn't touch it for a year. I think I ended up cutting all it's hair off, but that didn't make it look any less creepy.

So yeah, thanks for the gender role reinforcement, mom.


You were afraid of a doll? Something tells me your mom was trying her best.

29 Jun 2012 08:36 AM
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Thrakkorzog     
Cabbage patch kids are still old and busted and made in china probably so screw that. Go with American made LOG!
It's LOG!

29 Jun 2012 08:42 AM
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Herr Morgenstern     
spentmiles: Herr Morgenstern: Eventually she got me a My Buddy doll which, if you recall, looked a lot like Chuckie. I threw that thing in the closet and didn't touch it for a year. I think I ended up cutting all it's hair off, but that didn't make it look any less creepy.

So yeah, thanks for the gender role reinforcement, mom.

You were afraid of a doll? Something tells me your mom was trying her best.


I was seven?

29 Jun 2012 08:48 AM
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WhippingBoy    [TotalFark]  
Mock26: Those who enjoy My Little Pony call themselves Bronies. So, what will the adult male fans of Cabbage Patch Kids call themselves?

"Unemployable"

29 Jun 2012 09:08 AM
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Louisiana_Sitar_Club     
Mock26: Those who enjoy My Little Pony call themselves Bronies. So, what will the adult male fans of Cabbage Patch Kids call themselves?


Oh, fine. I'll do it.
(Ahem.......mee mee mee mee mee mee MEEEEEEEE!)

"Pedophiles"

29 Jun 2012 09:39 AM
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She comes in colors everywhere     
i49.tinypic.com

meet Barbie Maggie.

/that's right, a Cabbage named Barbie

29 Jun 2012 09:59 AM
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Langdon Alger     
yeah, cabbage patch kids were fun, especially when you added fireworks to em'. those little dolls burn really fast.

29 Jun 2012 10:11 AM
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Jon iz teh kewl     
www.peakelec.co.uk
cabbage patch cable

29 Jun 2012 10:24 AM
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Hand Banana    [TotalFark]  
i46.tinypic.com

29 Jun 2012 10:24 AM
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groppet     
kmmontandon: Let me know when Garbage Pail Kids are back in style.

I had every damned sticker for those, plastered all over my dresser when I was about 10.


I got a case of them in my closet mostly mint and good condition. Who knows maybe one day they might be worth something.

29 Jun 2012 11:01 AM
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iheartscotch     
elleonheels: My son had one of the originals, named Paxton Lloyd, Today, he's a grown up with no fear of expressing his emotions. If little girls learn how to be good mothers playing with dolls, where is the harm encouraging boys to do the same?

You want little boys to be good mothers? Don't we have enough trouble with 12 year old girls getting knocked up to encourage little boys to get knocked up?

/ I keed, I keed

29 Jun 2012 11:03 AM
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MBooda     
Props to GPK's.
1.bp.blogspot.com

29 Jun 2012 11:08 AM
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Clemkadidlefark     
Babyland General Hospital

www.travelroads.com

Where all the brothers at?

29 Jun 2012 11:13 AM
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elev8meL8r     
Mock26: Those who enjoy My Little Pony call themselves Bronies. So, what will the adult male fans of Cabbage Patch Kids call themselves?

Konies.

29 Jun 2012 11:20 AM
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