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NewsFlash  Tom Cruise shaves beard

29 Jun 2012 02:22 PM   |   29610 clicks   |   Sky.com
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FTGodWin     
LOL, good one subby.

29 Jun 2012 02:23 PM
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sgnilward    [TotalFark]  
+1

29 Jun 2012 02:23 PM
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Pants full of macaroni!!     
Katie is free again - but at what cost?

29 Jun 2012 02:23 PM
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Tat'dGreaser    [TotalFark]  
I am horribly shocked by this

29 Jun 2012 02:23 PM
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Beef Swellington     
Too many massage parties at Travolta's house...

29 Jun 2012 02:23 PM
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Petit_Merdeux     
Awesome, smitty.

29 Jun 2012 02:24 PM
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Silly Jesus    [TotalFark]  
I don't get the beard reference...

29 Jun 2012 02:24 PM
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forteblast     
I snerk'd. Bravo, subby.

29 Jun 2012 02:24 PM
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balancing act    [TotalFark]  
I was waiting for this. Even predicted the headline correctly..
OK, commence celebrating.
As a het female, this does not help me in the slightest.

29 Jun 2012 02:24 PM
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FarkinHostile     
Counseling by Xenu can save them.

29 Jun 2012 02:24 PM
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spman    [TotalFark]  
First John Travolta, now Tom Cruise, Xenu is going to be very displeased, quick feed him more money before he damages our thetans!

29 Jun 2012 02:24 PM
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you are a puppet     
Finally Chris Klein can see his kid?

29 Jun 2012 02:24 PM
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detroitdoesntsuckthatbad     
Pants full of macaroni!!: Katie is free again - but at what cost?

How long until all of Clearwater hunts her down and forces her back to SeaOrg (or whatever it's called)?

29 Jun 2012 02:24 PM
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Hershey Highway Patrol     
Hummm, 1st Travolta's in the news and Tom's back on the market. I wonder........

//Oh +1 to you subby

29 Jun 2012 02:24 PM
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monoski     
I thought my headline might have gotten me one:

Dudes, Katie Holmes is going back on the market. Gay dudes, so is Tom Cruise

29 Jun 2012 02:24 PM
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DontBeThatGuy    [TotalFark]  
Great headline. Would lol again.

+1

29 Jun 2012 02:24 PM
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rhondajeremy     
Wonder if she'll have to give up Suri like Nicole had to give up her kids (I know she sees them sometimes but Tom has primary custody-I think she had to give him that to be able to leave)

29 Jun 2012 02:25 PM
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strangeguitar     
As I wrote on FB, I think Rock of Ages was the last straw for Katie. Tom didn't just come out of the closet, he broke a land speed record.

29 Jun 2012 02:25 PM
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metaskie     
So, I don't get the "beard" meme. Anyone help a lurker out?

29 Jun 2012 02:25 PM
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mongbiohazard     
But will she be able to divorce herself from the cult as well?

29 Jun 2012 02:25 PM
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PsyLord    [TotalFark]  
That was unexpected.

29 Jun 2012 02:25 PM
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don't understand     
It's a sad, sad day. I was sure their love would last forever.

29 Jun 2012 02:25 PM
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weaklingrecords     
But *she* filed for divorce. So it's more that Tom Cruise's beard "fell off" or "left" or "filed for divorce" rather than Tom actually doing anything, right?

/I know, welcome to fark.jpg

29 Jun 2012 02:25 PM
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shastacola     
Silly Jesus: I don't get the beard reference...

A beard is a person that dates or marries a gay person so that person can stay in the closet.

29 Jun 2012 02:25 PM
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filter     
He'll get over it. Any bets how soon he remarries?

29 Jun 2012 02:26 PM
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FrancoFile     
rhondajeremy: Wonder if she'll have to give up Suri like Nicole had to give up her kids (I know she sees them sometimes but Tom has primary custody-I think she had to give him that to be able to leave)

She can just buy another damned iPhone. She's got plenty of money.

29 Jun 2012 02:26 PM
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angry_scientist     
I heard she was tired of putting hair on her butt

29 Jun 2012 02:26 PM
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KingPsyz     
So there was a breech in the compound's security?

29 Jun 2012 02:26 PM
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spman    [TotalFark]  
detroitdoesntsuckthatbad: Pants full of macaroni!!: Katie is free again - but at what cost?

How long until all of Clearwater hunts her down and forces her back to SeaOrg (or whatever it's called)?


After they split, Tom used Scientology to drive Nicole Kidman to drink, and I don't think they were much kinder to Penelope Cruz, Katie better watch out.

29 Jun 2012 02:26 PM
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llfennell     
I submitted this with a similar headline, but simple wins.

From what I've read, Katie signed a 5 year contract, part of the provision was to give birth to a child via artificial insemination of Cruises. After the 5 years was up, she could retain primary custody of the child and go about her business, with a gag order on anything Scientology.

She's been heading out in NYC with no makeup lately. Tom Cruise hates hates hates this. Her publicist called her to tell her that Tom was getting mad that her hag look was ruining his reputation and she laughed and said "Good!"

/blindgossip

29 Jun 2012 02:26 PM
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Tat'dGreaser    [TotalFark]  
shastacola: Silly Jesus: I don't get the beard reference...

A beard is a person that dates or marries a gay person so that person can stay in the closet.


Damn, learned something new today

29 Jun 2012 02:26 PM
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Beef Swellington     
metaskie: So, I don't get the "beard" meme. Anyone help a lurker out?

Beard: a woman used by a gay guy in order to pass as straight

29 Jun 2012 02:26 PM
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FarkinHostile     
Silly Jesus: I don't get the beard reference...

Some closet homosexuals get girlfriends/wives to maintain an illusion of heterosexuality (manliness); those girlfriends/wives are referred to as "Beards".

29 Jun 2012 02:26 PM
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Pump_ThePurpleWarrior     
DAMNIT!

Too slow on the headline!

+1UP!

29 Jun 2012 02:26 PM
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Klippoklondike    [TotalFark]  
metaskie: So, I don't get the "beard" meme. Anyone help a lurker out?

A beard is a common term for a spouse who's only purpose is to hide a person's true sexuality. In other words, he married Katie Holmes in order to seem heterosexual to the public.

29 Jun 2012 02:27 PM
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sigdiamond2000    [TotalFark]  
I'm not normally one to b*tch about headlines, but the fact that this got greenlit over the anal sex headline is one of the greatest miscarriages of justice in American history.

29 Jun 2012 02:27 PM
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Get Your Dick Out Of My Food     
him and eddie murphy should just totally date.

29 Jun 2012 02:27 PM
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Kyro    [TotalFark]  
I hate the fact that this is news flash-worthy.

29 Jun 2012 02:27 PM
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Strongbeerrules     
"Newsflash!" tag? Why?

29 Jun 2012 02:27 PM
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Cyclonic Cooking Action     
Smitty FTW.

29 Jun 2012 02:27 PM
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Silly Jesus    [TotalFark]  
shastacola: Silly Jesus: I don't get the beard reference...

A beard is a person that dates or marries a gay person so that person can stay in the closet.


Ah ok. Thanks. I have three beards then.

29 Jun 2012 02:28 PM
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Buttknuckle     
metaskie: So, I don't get the "beard" meme. Anyone help a lurker out?

A beard is a term for the wife of someone who is gay so they can stay in the closet.

29 Jun 2012 02:28 PM
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cubic_spleen     
metaskie: So, I don't get the "beard" meme. Anyone help a lurker out?

Wiki article.

29 Jun 2012 02:28 PM
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Walker    [TotalFark]  
Yeah, there have been blind gossip items about this for months saying they were going to get divorced. Sometimes the gossip is true!

Here's a blind item from May 21:

This actress - who worked much more several years ago than she does now - has found the perfect way to annoy her controlling husband. He always insisted that she not step foot out of the house unless she was looking her best (full hair, makeup, clothes) because she was a "reflection of his image".

But now that they have quietly separated, she consistently walks out of the house in casual clothes and messy hair and no makeup (even when her destination isn't the gym). Of course, the paparazzi are there, just waiting to snap her photo. Her publicist called and said, "Do you realize how much you're pissing him off when you do that?" She replied, "Absolutely!" and giggled. Sounds like it's just her little way of reclaiming her life.

img.photobucket.com
/her identity concealed for her protection (but yeah it's Katie)

29 Jun 2012 02:28 PM
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Brother_Mouzone     
a joke older than Katie Holmes is getting accolades. cool beans.

29 Jun 2012 02:28 PM
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All Latest     
He has already been spotted with his new girlfriend:

pub.tv2.no

29 Jun 2012 02:28 PM
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foo monkey     
The Suri one was better.

29 Jun 2012 02:28 PM
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EggSniper     
26.media.tumblr.com

Do we care? Are we caring about that?

29 Jun 2012 02:28 PM
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Theonceovertwice     
Yay! She's making her escape!

29 Jun 2012 02:28 PM
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stir22    [TotalFark]  
Tat'dGreaser: shastacola: Silly Jesus: I don't get the beard reference...

A beard is a person that dates or marries a gay person so that person can stay in the closet.

Damn, learned something new today


me too!! never heard of that one.

29 Jun 2012 02:28 PM
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