I submit that paying someone to paint your grass green is the new definition of "More money than brains".

WTF Indeed: I submit that paying someone to paint your grass green is the new definition of "More money than brains".

WTF Indeed: I submit that paying someone to paint your grass green is the new definition of "More money than brains".

Why? I bet it's less than you'd pay for a sprinkler system.

This is about the 4th greenlight for people painting their lawns green

Was the tag busy?

It's not stupid if it saves water and avoids HOA fines.

Benevolent Misanthrope: Why? I bet it's less than you'd pay for a sprinkler system.

If you are so vain as to need your grass "green" even in a severe drought you are sad, and if you spend money to make it "green" you are a sad moron.

WTF Indeed: Benevolent Misanthrope: Why? I bet it's less than you'd pay for a sprinkler system.

If you are so vain as to need your grass "green" even in a severe drought you are sad, and if you spend money to make it "green" you are a sad moron.

Some HOAs will fine you if your grass isn't green enough. There was an article about that greenlit here a few days ago. If the choice is violate watering bans and get fined by the county, stick to the watering bans and get nailed by the HOA, or paint your grass green so that it looks like everyone else's lawn and you don't incur the wrath of the county or the HOA....seems like a no-brainer.

In Arizona, people put crushed rock in their front yards and paint it green.

"an"

BarkingUnicorn: In Arizona ...

In Arizona people park in their front yards.

Jersey shore your lawn!

Yeah but then your grass is dead underneath. You have a green yard until it turns into a dust-bowl. I bet these people are really going to regret this in a few months.

It's farking boiling here in Seattle today. Jesus Christ. I couldn't even wear my flannel overshirt outside today.

God dammit, MSM. Just because Phelps got beat, I'm not gonna jump on this Lochte bullshiat train you keep wanting me to jump on.

Does it look okay with bare dirt? I get a little carried away when raking my lawn..

Oh you kids...

Remember when the gas stations in the late '60s/70s would do this. Nothing new.

My lawn is doing as well as anyone else's on the block. Lotsa clay in the NW Chicagoan soil. These brief microbursts go mostly into the catch basin. A coupla inches of loam and Watersorb and old compost and spent amendments from my horticulturist friends takes care of that! Down by the creek, got those mealy bugs that eat young grass roots. Trick there is to wait out the spring before seeding, I'm hopin'. When it is dry is an opportune time to ramp up the eternal war on weeds.

//Labor pool has moved on
//none the worse for wear, though

I live in illinois, and yes, my lawn is dead, brown, and not a speck of green anywhere. So is everyone else's. Nobody here is that butt stupid to spray their lawn green because of the drought. If you are really that worried about how your lawn looks, then really you should examine your priorities. Or maybe you're just one of those rich pricks with no worries, and shiat like this is all you think about. Must be nice, some of us real people have bigger fish to fry.

Did I see that right? Watch the USA sign girl, she seems to be checking out the guys and I think she licked her lips once.

/Maybe it's the vodka
//or I need more vodka

PaulieattheTap: Did I see that right? Watch the USA sign girl, she seems to be checking out the guys and I think she licked her lips once.

/Maybe it's the vodka
//or I need more vodka

Or ethosuximide

Hank Hill weeps. In secret, of course.

Even if it is Global Warming, it is warming due to solar activity and the solar system reaching a certain position in the galaxy. It is not due to C0₂ and carbon taxes will do nothing but economically rape us. However, lawns painted green with organic dyes are easier on the eyes. Did anyone cry global warming and apocalypse during the dust bowl? The latter yes, the former, unlikely.

WTF Indeed: I submit that paying someone to paint your grass green is the new definition of "More money than brains".

Also "More money than taste". That stuff's hideous. Why not just pave the yard and put down AstroTurf?

The grass is always greener over the septic tank.

~ Erma Bombeck

signaljammer: My lawn is doing as well as anyone else's on the block. Lotsa clay in the NW Chicagoan soil. These brief microbursts go mostly into the catch basin. A coupla inches of loam and Watersorb and old compost and spent amendments from my horticulturist friends takes care of that! Down by the creek, got those mealy bugs that eat young grass roots. Trick there is to wait out the spring before seeding, I'm hopin'. When it is dry is an opportune time to ramp up the eternal war on weeds.

//Labor pool has moved on
//none the worse for wear, though

The clay wouldn't be so bad if they jackass developers didn't scrape off of the topsoil first. I can cut my lawn with a shovel, and then roll it back to reveal clay and gravel (lawn has been established for 20 years). I'm guessing that I have no chance at a descent looking lawn unless I actually dig out a few inches of the clay/rocks and replace it with topsoil.

whatshisname: WTF Indeed: I submit that paying someone to paint your grass green is the new definition of "More money than brains".

Also "More money than taste". That stuff's hideous. Why not just pave the yard and put down AstroTurf?

I think the HOA would have a problem with that. Why? Who knows but I think they would figure out a way to have a problem with it.

My personal favorite fake grass is the infield (areas between runways and taxiways for non-aviation speakers) at LAX. Solid concrete, painted green, and the paint job doesn't even make it anywhere close to believable.

1. Healthy grass turns yellow or brown in drought conditions. It's not (necessarily) dead.
2. Grass lawns are retarded.

Colored concrete lasts for years and you can put in your favorite sports team logo.

call me when they have pink and purple

bojon: Colored concrete lasts for years and you can put in your favorite sports team logo.

I like your style.

aerojockey: 1. Healthy grass turns yellow or brown in drought conditions. It's not (necessarily) dead.
2. Grass lawns are retarded.

True but this year I'm not sure. It's pretty effing bad.

That said, we still water the garden (because if we're gonna spend $$ on the water bill, food to eat and flowers we grew from seeds win) and it's cute how the grass around the garden beds is doing fine. But still annoying cause it looks even worse. I'm not gonna effing break out the mower for 1/2' strips along wood, stone, or brick. No HOA but we're new in a older neighborhood and I felt kinda bad it looks like crap. At least half the neighbors have grass as brown as ours, though, so it's fine.

Our resident toad was still alive last week, though. I set him out a little ceramic pot full of water and he was chilling like an effing villain. Pretty sure all the tadpoles we saw in the creek didn't make it though.

/at some point the front is just gonna be all garden, screw grass
//not this year, though
///straight clay soil, can only do so much at once

/damn bugs they could've eaten...

BarkingUnicorn: In Arizona, people put crushed rock in their front yards and paint it green.

Just like the Army.

/GET OFF THE GRASS! (painted rocks)

DOING IT WRONG! You dip it red food coloring, call it 'purple kush' and charge extra.

The grass is always greener where the dogs are shiatting.

/Lookin' California
//Feelin' Minnesota.

BarkingUnicorn: In Arizona, people put crushed rock in their front yards and paint it green.

I see artificial turf a lot more than green rocks. The latter seems to be more common in older neighborhoods.

My last three houses have only had lawns in the back yard. I just need a small patch for the rug rats to roll around on. Rest of the yard is xeriscaped.

Farktologist: The grass is always greener where the dogs are shiatting.

/Lookin' California
//Feelin' Minnesota.

It seems like you have a sound garden.

I blame it all on Al Gore. He's the dude responsible for inventing global warming, right?

Dinjiin: BarkingUnicorn: In Arizona, people put crushed rock in their front yards and paint it green.

I see artificial turf a lot more than green rocks. The latter seems to be more common in older neighborhoods.

My last three houses have only had lawns in the back yard. I just need a small patch for the rug rats to roll around on. Rest of the yard is xeriscaped.

...I apparently moved before the green rocks/astroturf craze. I'm more than okay with this, but out of curiosity, where the hell do you guys live in Arizona that you see this?

BarkingUnicorn: It's not stupid if it saves water and avoids HOA fines.

It's stupid to be in an HOA, so I'll grant the green painted lawn is merely a symptom of the disease.

All HOA property covenants should be nullified because they require homeowners to provide material support for a terrorist organization and that's illegal since 9/11 at least.

You know what happened this year in the US midwest?

Lawns without constant watering were lush and green in the spring and they got brown in the summer and they will get lush and green again in October.

You know what happened every previous year in the US midwest where I have lived for decades?

Guess. Go on, guess.

MAYORBOB: I blame it all on Al Gore. He's the dude responsible for inventing global warming, right?

No that was the internet. Common misconception.

I'd happily find the HOA chairman's home and dye his grass too, especially if it's an imported exotic variety that he's had water and food shipped in to care for.

LadyBelgara: but out of curiosity, where the hell do you guys live in Arizona that you see this?

I've seen painted rocks over in Mesa and southern Scottsdale. Artificial turf was mainly in communities built within the past decade, so mostly Chandler, Gilbert, Ahwatukee, northern Scottsdale and the like.

Good idea. Looks good, doesn't need water, will come out of dormancy in the winter. Seems like a reasonable solution.

Bit'O'Gristle: I live in illinois, and yes, my lawn is dead, brown, and not a speck of green anywhere. So is everyone else's. Nobody here is that butt stupid to spray their lawn green because of the drought. If you are really that worried about how your lawn looks, then really you should examine your priorities. Or maybe you're just one of those rich pricks with no worries, and shiat like this is all you think about. Must be nice, some of us real people have bigger fish to fry.

Depends on your level of HOA Nazi. If Himmler Jr is liking THEIR grass being lush green because their hubby died 3 years ago and left them lots of life insurance and, thus, plenty of spendable cash, they
might deem it worthwhile to have a lawn look well watered. If they decide that a bunch of south facing front lawns look shabby, and yours is one of them, you might end up with a nice fine.

You then have to spend the time and money fighting that shiat, until the HOA gets their head out of their butts and puts in a clause that give you a pass in a drought. If Himmler is in charge of the reviews, it might require legal effort.

BarkingUnicorn: In Arizona, people put crushed rock in their front yards and paint it green.

Or they leave it that hideous shade of pink that is everywhere

The old school Italians where I live used to just paint the concrete green.

WTF Indeed: Benevolent Misanthrope: Why? I bet it's less than you'd pay for a sprinkler system.

If you are so vain as to need your grass "green" even in a severe drought you are sad, and if you spend money to make it "green" you are a sad moron.

More than likely there's some HOA with more Nazi-like tendencies than brains.

I mean, we can't waive those fees for having brown grass just because it's illegal/expensive to run the sprinklers, now can we?

/I live in the country
//I may be poorer than you, but I don't have to put up with a dickhead HOA
///haven't mowed since before Memorial Day weekend

When I was a kid, we had a neighbour who concreted his entire yard, and then painted it. We all thought he was nuts! :P And, we had no issues with water availability or HOA's or other "authorities" to answer to if your grass wasn't "perfect."