Kevin Kitson, David Jimenez's attorney, explained that his client was given permission to clean the crucifix, which was in desperate need of some tender, loving care. Holding the 600 pound statue in place was a single screw, one that would ultimately prove worthless in the long run.


Fools! Everyone knows that Jesus must be nailed up, not screwed.

/Thus sealith my fate.

Unfortunately for Jimenez, the same crucifix he attributes with saving his wife has now claimed one of his legs.


The Lord giveth....

Somebody thought magic came without a price.

That's alright. I'm sure God could just miracle it back.

Unless... Is there a football game this Sunday that He is already committed to paying attention to?

Damn... that thing must have really nailed him

Of course it happened in Newburgh.

The church should counter sue for payment for saving his wife

mamoru: That's alright. I'm sure God could just miracle it back.

Unless... Is there a football game this Sunday that He is already committed to paying attention to?

Wow. This was funny - last week.

whereisyourgodnow.jpg

Whoa Whoa Whoa, Miss Lippy, the part I don't get? Is why the pizza worker was cleaning the crucifix int he first place?!

Stigmata!

Do not taunt Happy Fun God.

I'm gonna crucify him. Real bad.

Well, to hell with this!

/Barry ZuckerKorn

Obviously he will lose, as this has to be ruled an act of God.

Jesus had his time on the cross; this guy had his time under it.

"The 45-year-old pizza worker"

Homie, you weren't making $3 million with that job if you worked 200 years.

GOD'S WILL!
GOD'S WILL!
GOD'S WILL!
GOD'S WILL!
GOD'S WILL!
GOD'S WILL!
GOD'S WILL!
GOD'S WILL!
GOD'S WILL!

See? The church has a perfect defense against negligence.

Getting crushed by a crucifix?

I guess I'd be pretty cross, too.

/Then again, I also try to look on the bright side of life.

IAmRight: "The 45-year-old pizza worker"

Homie, you weren't making $3 million with that job if you worked 200 years.

45 year old pizza?!
Must have been New York.
Or Chicago.

Whatever, they're both the same.

/trying to start another pizza flame war

The church cured his wife's cancer. He should have to pay 3 mill.

So God can cure cancer, but can't keep a piece of wood attached to a wall.

"Damn it, Jimenez, I'm a doctor, not a carpenter!"

So he'd asked for a miracle to cure his wife's cancer and it cost him his leg in return.

Sounds like a typical deal made with the devil.

the priest who gave his client permission to clean the statue should be held responsible for "telling someone to go forward with an action and causing this accident."

The person who decided that the mounting was sufficient may have caused it.
The person doing the cleaning may have caused it.

Unless the priest was one of the above, I've got to side with the insurance company on this one.

At least he didn't lose the leg playing football.

I_Am_Weasel

Fools! Everyone knows that Jesus must be nailed up, not screwed.


Correct. The militant followers are screwed up.

Sueing the church, brilliant idea considering Jesus already smited him once. The church should just remind him how popular this will make him in heaven.

H should sue Jesus

Let's take this out of the religious arena for a while. And try to match it with another similar institution.

Say this happened at Penn State, at the Football offices for instance. If something fell from the stadium and forced the amputation of a leg, $3M would be altogether a common claim, even if the guy made a little money betting on games earlier.

See, that was easy.

Girlfriend's gonna get paaaaid!

His suit is lame.
If only someone could heal him.

There's something very fishy about this story...

He was trying to pray away his wife's cancer?

Just consider it back-pay on their taxes.

Too bad it won't be covered by insurance due to it being an act of god.

Man loses leg after being crushed by giant crucifix.


Reported to be hopping mad.

It's like 10,000 spoons when all you need is a reinforced anchor.

At least it wasn't a giant cock.

hammettman: So he'd asked for a miracle to cure his wife's cancer and it cost him his leg in return.

Sounds like a typical deal made with the devil.

That's why Human Transmutation is strictly forbidden in the world of Alchemy. Our greatest taboo.

/get the man some automail, stat!

Amos Quito: At least it wasn't a giant cock.  




DAMN!

Who the hell hangs anything with 1 screw? I hung a 2 lb birdhouse this weekend and it required two screws.

Hey at least curing his wife's cancer didn't cost him an arm and a leg.

seniorgato: Who the hell hangs anything with 1 screw? I hung a 2 lb birdhouse this weekend and it required two screws.

A 600-lb crucifix, no less.

That's a hell of a screw.

Amos Quito: Amos Quito: At least it wasn't a giant cock.  

[rlv.zcache.com image 400x400]


DAMN!

That's a lot of cock.

IAmRight: seniorgato: Who the hell hangs anything with 1 screw? I hung a 2 lb birdhouse this weekend and it required two screws.

A 600-lb crucifix, no less.

That's a hell of a screw.

that's what your mom said last night!

I didn't know my uncle was in the crucifix installing business.

That cross needs some crucifixin'.

ArkAngel: The church should counter sue for payment for saving his wife

You'd not only have to find a way to demonstrate that the Almighty intervened on his wife's behalf (and no, her cancer going into remission isn't prima facie evidence of this, cancer goes into remission all the time even when no one prayed for it), and also that this was somehow arranged by the church itself. Even if you did manage to argue this in a court of law, this still would not let the church off the hook for securing that crucifix in such a substandard fashion. Being a church doesn't excuse such haflassed engineering and workmanship, frankly.

Silly Christians and their evil god, crushing legs and making rape babies. When you they ever learn?