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   If you steal something from President Obama, don't go bragging to your buddies. You will get caught

08 Nov 2012 02:28 PM   |   18927 clicks   |   WTVR
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Walker    [TotalFark]  
South Park did it.

08 Nov 2012 11:43 AM
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BKITU    [TotalFark]  
Rarely do the words "criminal" and "mastermind" go together well outside the bounds of fiction.

08 Nov 2012 12:02 PM
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xanadian    [TotalFark]  
Wow. That is epic levels of brazenness AND stupidity.

08 Nov 2012 01:01 PM
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you are a puppet     
lol, how does the headline not mention that he stole a teleprompter. it almost makes me think hannity was behind it

08 Nov 2012 02:32 PM
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The Angry Hand of God     

BKITU: Rarely do the words "criminal" and "mastermind" go together well outside the bounds of fiction.

Days later, the equipment was found at a Holiday Inn Express near the airport.

The crime remained a mystery until federal investigators received a tip that a man had been bragging about the theft. Federal officials identified that man as 48-year-old Eric Brown.


He did stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night.

08 Nov 2012 02:32 PM
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ChipNASA    [TotalFark]  
In before: www.newzbreaker.com

08 Nov 2012 02:32 PM
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The Angry Hand of God     
And I was trying to quote Xanadian. Fail.

08 Nov 2012 02:32 PM
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boarch     
FTFA:
"Nowadays you have technology that states and the Feds can subpoena. They can go back and look at the date of the theft and see if the suspect's phone was in that area. It looks like they did that in this case, which makes it tougher to defend."


That's some farked up stuff. Everybody knows you always use a pre-paid wally world phone whilst stealing box trucks.

08 Nov 2012 02:35 PM
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jjorsett     
What I find more interesting is the fact that stuff that would be placed near the President went unguarded. The SS goes to a lot of trouble to make sure his surroundings are safe, and the podium he's going to stand at was left unattended in a parking lot?

08 Nov 2012 02:36 PM
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Why Would I Read the Article     
Obama without his teleprompter? That speech must have had at least 30 times the amount of "um's" and "uhs" as usual!

08 Nov 2012 02:36 PM
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Jesterling     

Why Would I Read the Article: Obama without his teleprompter? That speech must have had at least 30 times the amount of "um's" and "uhs" as usual!


Heyoooo!

08 Nov 2012 02:42 PM
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dabbletech     

Why Would I Read the Article: Obama without his teleprompter? That speech must have had at least 30 times the amount of "um's" and "uhs" as usual!


www.chinadaily.com.cn

08 Nov 2012 02:51 PM
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superfudge73     
fail thread

08 Nov 2012 03:07 PM
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KrispyKritter    [TotalFark]  

jjorsett: What I find more interesting is the fact that stuff that would be placed near the President went unguarded. The SS goes to a lot of trouble to make sure his surroundings are safe, and the podium he's going to stand at was left unattended in a parking lot?


^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ So Much This.

08 Nov 2012 03:20 PM
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StoPPeRmobile     
"Anytime you're talking President of the United States, there's a possibility sensitive information may be involved, so that's why it was investigated so thoroughly," said CBS 6 legal analyst Todd Stone.

I wonder how much they spent on "investigating."

I bet they could have bought over 9000 replacements.

08 Nov 2012 03:24 PM
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porcupine tree     
It's ok. According to the constitution, if something happens to Obama's teleprompter, Biden's teleprompter is first in the line of succession.

08 Nov 2012 03:26 PM
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logieal    [TotalFark]  
In other, completely unrelated news, cell phone companies are holding tracking data on you going back years. Who needs a tin foil hat?

Good thing no one ever predicted that.

08 Nov 2012 03:31 PM
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BostonEMT     
they only caught him because he was Brown.

\Always after the Brown man...

\\Why do think I did it? 'cuz I'm..... Brown?

08 Nov 2012 03:44 PM
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Burr     
Wait....

Doesn't the US government own the equipment, and in turn the people?

I don't think he can take it with him when he leaves...

So, this guy was just taking his stuff back!

08 Nov 2012 03:46 PM
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groppet     

KrispyKritter: jjorsett: What I find more interesting is the fact that stuff that would be placed near the President went unguarded. The SS goes to a lot of trouble to make sure his surroundings are safe, and the podium he's going to stand at was left unattended in a parking lot?

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ So Much This.


They were probably hooking up with some Columbian hookers.

08 Nov 2012 03:55 PM
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Arkanaut     
but the affidavit states the feds' smoking gun was a cell phone.

He just wanted his Obamaphone.

08 Nov 2012 03:57 PM
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Fano    [TotalFark]  
Extinguish meeeeeeeee!!!

08 Nov 2012 04:24 PM
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BostonEMT     

groppet: KrispyKritter: jjorsett: What I find more interesting is the fact that stuff that would be placed near the President went unguarded. The SS goes to a lot of trouble to make sure his surroundings are safe, and the podium he's going to stand at was left unattended in a parking lot?

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ So Much This.

They were probably hooking up with some Columbian hookers.


I HOPE they're better looking than *dry heave* RICHMOND hookers...

08 Nov 2012 04:26 PM
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Fano    [TotalFark]  
Surely you realize that your success has made you some bitter enemies?
Obama: [laughs] Revenge? You? I am OBAMA! I kill when I wish! I am strong, strong, STRONG! My armor is like tenfold shields! My teeth like swords! My claws, spears! The shock of my tail, an A-10 thunderbolt! My wings, a hurricane! And my breath, death!

08 Nov 2012 04:28 PM
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hypocaffeinemia    [TotalFark]  
You stand *on* a podium.

You stand *behind* a lectern.

08 Nov 2012 04:43 PM
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Fast Thick Pants     

hypocaffeinemia: You stand *on* a podium.

You stand *behind* a lectern.


You stand *above* an intern.

08 Nov 2012 05:13 PM
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blatz514    [TotalFark]  

Fast Thick Pants: hypocaffeinemia: You stand *on* a podium.

You stand *behind* a lectern.

You stand *above* an intern.


You stand *in front* of...nevermind

08 Nov 2012 05:18 PM
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Chevello     

blatz514: Fast Thick Pants: hypocaffeinemia: You stand *on* a podium.

You stand *behind* a lectern.

You stand *above* an intern.

You stand *in front* of...nevermind


A jury?

08 Nov 2012 05:31 PM
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Apos     

blatz514: Fast Thick Pants: hypocaffeinemia: You stand *on* a podium.

You stand *behind* a lectern.

You stand *above* an intern.

You stand *in front* of...nevermind


A firing squad?

08 Nov 2012 06:18 PM
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ZeroCorpse     

Fano: Surely you realize that your success has made you some bitter enemies?
Obama: [laughs] Revenge? You? I am OBAMA! I kill when I wish! I am strong, strong, STRONG! My armor is like tenfold shields! My teeth like swords! My claws, spears! The shock of my tail, an A-10 thunderbolt! My wings, a hurricane! And my breath, death!


Karl Rove: "Dwarves? Now that's a supper!"

08 Nov 2012 06:25 PM
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Straelbora     

ChipNASA: In before: [www.newzbreaker.com image 280x146]


Pretty much. There's a link here on Fark to a Las Vegas employer who laid off 22 of his 114 employees in anticipation of the crushing Obama taxes coming. The comments section following the story are like science fiction, depicting some strange parallel Earth.

08 Nov 2012 07:16 PM
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runescorpio     

boarch: FTFA:
"Nowadays you have technology that states and the Feds can subpoena. They can go back and look at the date of the theft and see if the suspect's phone was in that area. It looks like they did that in this case, which makes it tougher to defend."

That's some farked up stuff. Everybody knows you always use a pre-paid wally world phone whilst stealing box trucks.


Or just turn the damn thing off.....

08 Nov 2012 07:22 PM
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RedPhoenix122    [TotalFark]  

Fast Thick Pants: hypocaffeinemia: You stand *on* a podium.

You stand *behind* a lectern.

You stand *above* an intern.


You stand *on* a soapbox.

09 Nov 2012 01:59 AM
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