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   Humans first made projectile weapons 71,000 years ago, immediately started arguing over whether flung stones killed people or big hairy people killed people

08 Nov 2012 12:04 PM   |   2960 clicks   |   TG Daily
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Kingly Weevil     
Obama will send his time squad back in time to take their primitive guns away legally because they aren't yet covered by the second amendment and therefore it's legal and via time stream butterfly effect will prevent the invention of guns thereby taking guns away from every citizen of the modern world legally and preventing their invention altogether

yall shoulda voted for romney

08 Nov 2012 09:15 AM
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TabASlotB     
You'll have to pry Grog's atlatl from Grog's cold, dead hands.

08 Nov 2012 10:18 AM
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Hershey Highway Patrol     
Neanderthal Rifle Association

08 Nov 2012 10:30 AM
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somedude210    [TotalFark]  
Neanderthal Rock-throwing Association

08 Nov 2012 10:33 AM
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MaudlinMutantMollusk    [TotalFark]  
NO on rock registration!

08 Nov 2012 11:07 AM
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PhiloeBedoe     
i1079.photobucket.com

08 Nov 2012 11:13 AM
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Sock Ruh Tease     

Hershey Highway Patrol: Neanderthal Rifle Association


So, no change from the current NRA?

cache.ohinternet.com

08 Nov 2012 12:06 PM
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dittybopper    [TotalFark]  
Even my first attempts were better:

i56.tinypic.com

I improved with practice:

i56.tinypic.com

i45.tinypic.com

08 Nov 2012 12:07 PM
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Treygreen13     
Stones don't kill people, nuh-uh.
I kill people. WITH STONES.

08 Nov 2012 12:07 PM
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Spiralmonkey    [TotalFark]  
Han shot first.

/wait, they mean a long time ago not far far away? Ok, carry on.

08 Nov 2012 12:07 PM
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KingKauff    [TotalFark]  
"You just killed a man!"
"No, I shot him. The bullets and the fall killed him"

08 Nov 2012 12:08 PM
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Marquis de Sod     
Came for 2001 segue

/leaving disappointed

08 Nov 2012 12:09 PM
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RoyHobbs22     
Those crazy rock collectors were also concerned about their jerbs and the Bildeboulders.

08 Nov 2012 12:09 PM
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protectyourlimbs     

Kingly Weevil: Obama will send his time squad back in time to take their primitive guns away legally because they aren't yet covered by the second amendment and therefore it's legal and via time stream butterfly effect will prevent the invention of guns thereby taking guns away from every citizen of the modern world legally and preventing their invention altogether

yall shoulda voted for romney


NOW you tell me???

08 Nov 2012 12:11 PM
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CygnusDarius     
It's all sticks to me.

How did the art of weaponry started? It started with our ancestors holding a giant stick. Then, someone had the idea to add a rock to that giant stick, someone else decided to sharpen that rock in the stick, but it was a stick still the same, and then someone decided to make a longer stick with a pointy end. A few years later, a stick with a string was invented to throw little pointed sticks, and then someone made a sharp stick with metal, and all of a sudden, we foguth against each other with metal pointy, sharpened sticks.

Several years later, someone had the bright idea to make a hollow metal stick, and with black powder, use it to throw even tinier sticks made of lead. Now we have self-propelled sticks that can destroy cities.

So, Hail The Stick!

08 Nov 2012 12:12 PM
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Treygreen13     

CygnusDarius: How did the art of weaponry started?


08 Nov 2012 12:12 PM
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MBooda     

Marquis de Sod: Came for 2001 segue

/leaving disappointed


Sorry, lumbered over here from the water hole as fast as I could!
kino-az.com 
/at'lat'l show 'em

08 Nov 2012 12:13 PM
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Leeds     
I always wondered how long "long long ago" was.

Evidently Han is 71,000 years old now, huh?

08 Nov 2012 12:13 PM
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whither_apophis     
I'm listening to Also Sprach Zarathustra right now so I'm getting a kick out of this.

08 Nov 2012 12:14 PM
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iheartscotch    [TotalFark]  
You'll take my pointy stick when you pry it from my cold, dead hands.

08 Nov 2012 12:15 PM
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MBooda     

Kingly Weevil: Obama

[...] romney

So where did they find these primitive weapons? Kenya Hawaii?

08 Nov 2012 12:15 PM
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Snarcoleptic_Hoosier    [TotalFark]  
I have my spear to keep government out of my cave!

08 Nov 2012 12:16 PM
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iheartscotch    [TotalFark]  

Treygreen13: CygnusDarius: How did the art of weaponry started?


All your base are belong to us?

08 Nov 2012 12:17 PM
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Sin_City_Superhero    [TotalFark]  
This is such bullshiat! Everybody knows that the Earth is only 6,000 years old. It must be true, 'cause the GOP told me so.

08 Nov 2012 12:17 PM
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CygnusDarius     

Treygreen13: CygnusDarius: How did the art of weaponry started?


It started with sitkcs! And babbys!.

08 Nov 2012 12:19 PM
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kodiax2     
So humans were around for 80,000 years before one of them finally figured out how to make an arrow.

08 Nov 2012 12:20 PM
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wippit     
"Let 'em all go to hell, except Cave 76!"

08 Nov 2012 12:20 PM
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Treygreen13     

CygnusDarius: Treygreen13: CygnusDarius: How did the art of weaponry started?

It started with sitkcs! And babbys!.


I am truely sorry for your lots.

08 Nov 2012 12:21 PM
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Deep Contact     
Evidence of a huge battle 70,000 years ago.
grades.tapity.com

08 Nov 2012 12:27 PM
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leonel     
Now is not the right time to talk about flung rock control.

08 Nov 2012 12:27 PM
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MBooda     

leonel: Now is not the right time to talk about flung rock control.


Sez you.
community.oen.org

08 Nov 2012 12:29 PM
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Therion    [TotalFark]  

CygnusDarius: So, Hail The Stick!


And hail their Order!

farm4.static.flickr.com

08 Nov 2012 12:31 PM
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Englebert Slaptyback     

MBooda


leonel: Now is not the right time to talk about flung rock control.

Sez you.


JEHOVAH!

*runs away*

08 Nov 2012 12:31 PM
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dittybopper    [TotalFark]  

Deep Contact: Evidence of a huge battle 70,000 years ago.
[grades.tapity.com image 800x600]


Actually, I see some nice hammerstones in there.

08 Nov 2012 12:34 PM
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dittybopper    [TotalFark]  

Therion: CygnusDarius: So, Hail The Stick!

And hail their Order!

[farm4.static.flickr.com image 334x500]


Piss-poor form. The littlebopper was better back when he was 5 years old:

i40.tinypic.com

08 Nov 2012 12:36 PM
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Agent Smiths Laugh     
See the best policy is to make rocks real expensive...

www.pricescope.com

Oh...maybe that's why nobody shoots each other with diamonds... 

/me and a friend have a long standing assertion that all mankind has ever really done is kill each other with progressively more impressive rocks

08 Nov 2012 12:38 PM
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dcigary    [TotalFark]  
images4.wikia.nocookie.net

/seriously - do I have to do everything around here?

08 Nov 2012 12:39 PM
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Agent Smiths Laugh     

Deep Contact: Evidence of a huge battle 70,000 years ago.
[grades.tapity.com image 800x600]


Happy fun rock is hiding in that picture.

08 Nov 2012 12:40 PM
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mdeesnuts     
+1 Subby.

08 Nov 2012 12:42 PM
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Bad Man     

Deep Contact: Evidence of a huge battle 70,000 years ago.
[grades.tapity.com image 800x600]


Thank you for the laugh.

08 Nov 2012 12:44 PM
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Zafler     

Therion: CygnusDarius: So, Hail The Stick!

And hail their Order!

[farm4.static.flickr.com image 334x500]


There is Order of the Stick cosplay? I'm so confused.

08 Nov 2012 12:47 PM
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wippit     

kodiax2: So humans were around for 80,000 years before one of them finally figured out how to make an arrow.


Well, see... bow are martial weapons. Clubs and short spears, they're simple weapons. Humans needed to level so they could take a martial weapon proficiency

08 Nov 2012 12:54 PM
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Aikidogamer     

CygnusDarius: It's all sticks to me.

How did the art of weaponry started? It started with our ancestors holding a giant stick. Then, someone had the idea to add a rock to that giant stick, someone else decided to sharpen that rock in the stick, but it was a stick still the same, and then someone decided to make a longer stick with a pointy end. A few years later, a stick with a string was invented to throw little pointed sticks, and then someone made a sharp stick with metal, and all of a sudden, we foguth against each other with metal pointy, sharpened sticks.

Several years later, someone had the bright idea to make a hollow metal stick, and with black powder, use it to throw even tinier sticks made of lead. Now we have self-propelled sticks that can destroy cities.

So, Hail The Stick!


Epic!

08 Nov 2012 12:56 PM
Reply
Aikidogamer     

wippit: kodiax2: So humans were around for 80,000 years before one of them finally figured out how to make an arrow.

Well, see... bow are martial weapons. Clubs and short spears, they're simple weapons. Humans needed to level so they could take a martial weapon proficiency


thAC0 was used back then though...

08 Nov 2012 01:00 PM
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dittybopper    [TotalFark]  

Agent Smiths Laugh: me and a friend have a long standing assertion that all mankind has ever really done is kill each other with progressively more impressive rocks


There is no species of fauna that man hasn't come into contact with that he hasn't been able to kill with something as simple as a pointed stick.

It's kind of the hallmark of our species.

08 Nov 2012 01:25 PM
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dittybopper    [TotalFark]  

dittybopper: Agent Smiths Laugh: me and a friend have a long standing assertion that all mankind has ever really done is kill each other with progressively more impressive rocks

There is no species of fauna that man hasn'tcome into contact with that he hasn't been able to kill with something as simple as a pointed stick.

It's kind of the hallmark of our species.


FTFM.

08 Nov 2012 01:26 PM
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Fapinator     
i.imgur.com

08 Nov 2012 01:27 PM
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The more you eat the more you fart     
Mama, just killed a man
Put a rock against his head
Pulled my bowstring, now he's dead
Mama, life had just begun
But now I've gone and thrown it all away
Mama, ooo
Didn't mean to make you cry
If I'm not back again this time tomorrow
Carry on, carry on, as if nothing really matters

08 Nov 2012 01:28 PM
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ISO15693     
Mama
I just stoned a man
Flung a rock against his head
knocked him down and now he's dead

08 Nov 2012 01:29 PM
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ISO15693     

The more you eat the more you fart: Mama, just killed a man
Put a rock against his head
Pulled my bowstring, now he's dead
Mama, life had just begun
But now I've gone and thrown it all away
Mama, ooo
Didn't mean to make you cry
If I'm not back again this time tomorrow
Carry on, carry on, as if nothing really matters


I hate you, lol.

08 Nov 2012 01:32 PM
Reply
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