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   The David Petraeus love triangle just became a love rectangle

13 Nov 2012 02:53 AM   |   11472 clicks   |   Gawker
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rynthetyn    [TotalFark]  
Well, I can see why he stepped down. This whole thing is a soap opera.

12 Nov 2012 11:53 PM
GGracie     
Why can't there ever be a Matthew McConaughey love polygon, or a Channing Tatum love scandal? Or even better... a Nathan Fillion hot and sloppy 'til the cops arrive scandal.

I don't want to hear about an old government hack getting freaky. It just ruins my desire to ever have sex again.

12 Nov 2012 11:57 PM
ZAZ    [TotalFark]  
Jill Kelley has an identical twin, so make that a love pentagon. How appropriate. I want to believe he was doing both twins and they were both secret agents. It's looking like Jill may have been.

13 Nov 2012 12:00 AM
dj_bigbird    [TotalFark]  
All that's missing is the KGB and a polonium poisoning.

13 Nov 2012 12:01 AM
MaudlinMutantMollusk    [TotalFark]  
"Love rectangle" sounds very uncomfortable

/on a number of levels

13 Nov 2012 12:02 AM
Dallymo    [TotalFark]  
From the Daily Beast article linked in TFA:

Her father told the New York Daily News that there is "a lot more here than meets the eye," though he declined say what that might be.


SHE'S A TRANSFORMER!

13 Nov 2012 12:02 AM
violentsalvation    [TotalFark]  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: "Love rectangle" sounds very uncomfortable

/on a number of levels


She took it in the pooper? oh..

13 Nov 2012 12:05 AM
Marcus Aurelius    [TotalFark]  
I'm holding out for a pentagon.

13 Nov 2012 12:07 AM
unyon    [TotalFark]  

GGracie: Why can't there ever be a Matthew McConaughey love polygon, or a Channing Tatum love scandal? Or even better... a Nathan Fillion hot and sloppy 'til the cops arrive scandal.

I don't want to hear about an old government hack getting freaky. It just ruins my desire to ever have sex again.


Just picture it in black and white. Then it's not old and creepy, it's Mad Men retro and cool.

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13 Nov 2012 12:08 AM
Marcus Aurelius    [TotalFark]  

rynthetyn: Well, I can see why he stepped down


Gangnam style?

13 Nov 2012 12:10 AM
Triumph    [TotalFark]  

rynthetyn: Well, I can see why he stepped down. This whole thing is a soap opera.


FBI is searching the Broadwell home. If they come up with a cum-stained dress, THEN I'll agree he should have stepped down.

13 Nov 2012 12:10 AM
propasaurus    [TotalFark]  
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mmm

13 Nov 2012 12:17 AM
WTF Indeed    [TotalFark]  
This is just another way Obama is destroying the fabric of the American family. Obama plans to create a new cabinet post and appoint Petraeus as the Secretary of Swinging.

13 Nov 2012 12:18 AM
Irving Maimway    [TotalFark]  

propasaurus: [static6.businessinsider.com image 400x300]
[4.bp.blogspot.com image 375x563]


mmm


Rashida Jones also strikes me as a woman with a great sense of humor and she's a Farkette. The girlfriend seems way too uptight.

13 Nov 2012 12:24 AM
propasaurus    [TotalFark]  
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This TV movie practically casts itself.

13 Nov 2012 12:25 AM
dudemanbro     
So they're all Republicans?

13 Nov 2012 12:29 AM
Marcus Aurelius    [TotalFark]  
Goatse is as goatse does.

13 Nov 2012 12:29 AM
make me some tea    [TotalFark]  
This is exactly why the CIA should only hire ugly people.

13 Nov 2012 12:34 AM
doyner    [TotalFark]  
Jill Kelly?
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13 Nov 2012 12:37 AM
shower_in_my_socks    [TotalFark]  
If he couldn't keep this shiat quiet, then he didn't deserve to be head of the CIA.

That's why he quit, right?

13 Nov 2012 12:41 AM
dudemanbro     

shower_in_my_socks: That's why he quit, right?


Yep. One would expect the head of THE FARKING CIA to make better decisions.

13 Nov 2012 12:48 AM
Mentat    [TotalFark]  
Now all we need is Bill Clinton, a pair of jumper cables and a three-day weekend in Vegas for this story to become officially awesome.

13 Nov 2012 12:51 AM
MisterTweak    [TotalFark]  

Marcus Aurelius: I'm holding out for a pentagon.


At this rate, you'll probably want to cash in that bet on the early AM news.

I gotta be honest, I am really a bit surprised. This guy was one of the very few that almost nobody had a negative opinion about.

13 Nov 2012 12:54 AM
propasaurus    [TotalFark]  
The AP is reporting that the Pentagon investigating top commander in Afghanistan for emails to woman in Petraeus scandal.

But that's pretty much the extent of that story as of right now, just that one sentence.

13 Nov 2012 01:10 AM
RoyBatty     
My guess is that as reported, there was no affair between Petraeus and Kelley.

If there had been an affair, then Kelley would have mentioned the emails to him and not to the FBI. Since she didn't know they were about the general, she went to the FBI.

13 Nov 2012 01:13 AM
rynthetyn    [TotalFark]  

propasaurus: The AP is reporting that the Pentagon investigating top commander in Afghanistan for emails to woman in Petraeus scandal.

But that's pretty much the extent of that story as of right now, just that one sentence.


Maybe the love rectangle is a love pentagon.

13 Nov 2012 01:22 AM
rynthetyn    [TotalFark]  
As somebody on twitter said, and the Right thought it was gay sex that was going to hurt the US military...

13 Nov 2012 01:32 AM
unyon    [TotalFark]  

Mentat: Now all we need is Bill Clinton, a pair of jumper cables and a three-day weekend in Vegas for this story to become officially awesome.


Add in a firetruck and a hand grenade, and it goes Super Awesome.

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13 Nov 2012 02:22 AM
R.A.Danny     
Arrogance is worse than stupidity.

13 Nov 2012 02:33 AM
unyon    [TotalFark]  
If you count his wife in there, this thing has gone PENTAGON

13 Nov 2012 02:34 AM
hammettman    [TotalFark]  
I was told there'd be no geometry.

13 Nov 2012 02:51 AM
jetzzfan    [TotalFark]  
There's never any love for the rhombus.

13 Nov 2012 02:54 AM
Loucifer     

unyon: If you count his wife in there, this thing has gone PENTAGON


No one is going to count his wife in there.

13 Nov 2012 02:55 AM
MurphyMurphy     

dudemanbro: shower_in_my_socks: That's why he quit, right?

Yep. One would expect the head of THE FARKING CIA to make better decisions.


If I said it once I've said it a thousand times...

If you want to let it out of the basement put a ring on it.

13 Nov 2012 02:59 AM
shpritz     

GGracie: Why can't there ever be a Matthew McConaughey love polygon, or a Channing Tatum love scandal? Or even better... a Nathan Fillion hot and sloppy 'til the cops arrive scandal.

I don't want to hear about an old government hack getting freaky. It just ruins my desire to ever have sex again.


Petraeus doesn't look that bad. And the two women I've seen were hot. I can fap to that.

13 Nov 2012 03:00 AM
KrispyKritter     
farking ridiculous. places i've worked there was more married people cheating than being faithful. most people have little morality, that's all.

13 Nov 2012 03:00 AM
MrEricSir     
Didn't the B52's do a song about this?

13 Nov 2012 03:01 AM
Lord Summerisle     
Do middle-aged, professional people really behave like this? It's like Les Liaisons Dangereux for spastics.

13 Nov 2012 03:01 AM
propasaurus    [TotalFark]  
What's the FBI looking for at her house?

OOH! Wait! Her house is in Charlotte. That's where the DNC was held this year. Did Obama pay her a visit at home while he was in town?

13 Nov 2012 03:03 AM
nucular bum     

MaudlinMutantMollusk: "Love rectangle" sounds very uncomfortable

/on a number of levels


While "love cylinder" and "love torus" just sound geeky.

13 Nov 2012 03:06 AM
kona     

Irving Maimway: propasaurus: [static6.businessinsider.com image 400x300]
[4.bp.blogspot.com image 375x563]


mmm

Rashida Jones also strikes me as a woman with a great sense of humor and she's a Farkette. The girlfriend seems way too uptight.


Rashida Jones is hawt.

Wait.... She is a what now?...?

13 Nov 2012 03:07 AM
goatleggedfellow     
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13 Nov 2012 03:07 AM
AbbeySomeone     

shower_in_my_socks: If he couldn't keep this shiat quiet, then he didn't deserve to be head of the CIA.

That's why he quit, right?


The real issue here is the catty BS between Kelly and Broadwell. He would have gotten away with it if it weren't for whatever b*tchfest they have going on.
Hey, how much of our tax money is being spent on this anyhow?

13 Nov 2012 03:11 AM
El Pachuco     

MrEricSir: Didn't the B52's do a song about this?


No, you're thinking of Fred Schneider's solo album.

13 Nov 2012 03:12 AM
MurphyMurphy     
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13 Nov 2012 03:12 AM
Bigdogdaddy     
Ah, still ragging on the good general? Well, at least he's not a hypocrite having butsects with all them queer soldiers and sailors the nObummer let in the military. What good is a lifetime in the miltray if you can't dock your ship in as many ports as you possibly can. At least we can thank Allah for that fact. Praise Buddah

13 Nov 2012 03:14 AM
Elmo Jones     
So that's where Agent Mulder ended up.
/Love polygon

13 Nov 2012 03:15 AM
Aulus    [TotalFark]  
Oh, and it gets even more messed up: Link

13 Nov 2012 03:16 AM
goatleggedfellow     
Thank God more women turned up. This was getting way too much hype for a simple cheating scandal.

13 Nov 2012 03:19 AM
KeelingLovesCornholes     
News now reporting the top U.S. general in Afghanistan, John Allen, is being investigated for inappropriate emails to Kelley. So it's pretty clear "unpaid social liaison" translates to "slut for anyone over 2-stars".

13 Nov 2012 03:20 AM
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