Give Texas back to Mexico, wait a couple weeks, watch as they beg to return.

Problem solved.

Done in one.

"All you have to do is pay off your share of the national debt and we'll let you go"

FirstNationalBastard: Give Texas back to Mexico, wait a couple weeks, watch as they beg to return.

Problem solved.

Romney DID warn Perry about those "magnets".

I'm guessing it'll be more of a "Haha no." type response.

They could also go with a classy "Secession: NOT YOURS" animated GIF.

The response should just be a photo of Gen. Sherman.

You say that like the White House will actually respond to the petition with something meaningful.

Remember the petition asking for marijuana legalization?

FirstNationalBastard: Give Texas back to Mexico, wait a couple weeks, watch as they beg to return.

Problem solved.

Or let them try to survive independently. Maybe they can join with Quebec and become some sort of new superpower.

Please, we insist.

Dismember the Alamo.

Can they respond with a picture of Curly Bill?

Please let them go.

"Get your legislature to send me a request, then we'll talk."

Then sit back and watch the fun erupt.

Before everyone says 'no way', think about it.

1) Obama hates Texas as much, if not more, then Texas hates Obama.
2) With the loss of 30 something guaranteed red state votes, he would make the path to the Whitehouse much easier for Nancy Pelosi.

I think he should just walk into the press room, go behind the podium, pick up the mic, recite Bill Pullman's speech from Independence Day, drop it, and leave. But that's just me.

They're entitled to their opinion and they shouldn't be punished for it. However, I will fight for my own right, as an American, to laugh at them.

How about

AMF

What about "Fine but only if you take Oklahoma with you"? That'll sour the deal real fast.

I'd love to see the people they would choose to run their new federal government.

Secession is unconstitutional. QED.

Raging Whore Moans: Done in one.

Bullshiat. This is well settled. The land stays. They're free to pack their shiat up and drag it to whatever hell-hole will take them.

jayhawk88: What about "Fine but only if you take Oklahoma with you"? That'll sour the deal real fast.

Aw, prairie sh-t...

I think a proportional response is called for. Time to move a military base up north. We're just trying to make them happy.

Expel them from the union, for the lulz

LabGrrl: I think a proportional response is called for. Time to move a military base up north. We're just trying to make them happy.

I like you.

wildcardjack: "All you have to do is pay off your share of the national debt and we'll let you go"

Ah yes and all the federally owned land- which is a lot of the state- of course still belongs to the USA. That includes the offshore oil leases.

Perry, you pussy.

Bullets are technically a form of response.

The White House Response should be short enough:

"Dear Texas:

Remember Texas vs. White? No? Then look it up.

By the way, no.

Sincerely,

The White House"

Why do so many of you have a problem with this? Let em do it.

In other news, you can find 25,000 people in TX who think that the world is flat and was created in 6 days, but that doesn't make them any less idiots.

Valiente: Dismember the Alamo.

Lawls!

AFKobel: Please let them go.

Bismillah! We will not let them Go!

You go be Democrats in the blue states and try out all your new theories. We'll secede, and then clean up when you implode like your inspiration, the Soviet Union.

super_grass: You say that like the White House will actually respond to the petition with something meaningful.

Remember the petition asking for marijuana legalization?

This

Largest recipient of FEMA dollars gone, one budget closer to fixed.

Hey guys, really, we should all be on board. Here is a great case for having two Americas

garandman1a: Obama hates Texas as much, if not more, then Texas hates Obama.

Actually, Texas is one of the best fundraising states for Obama. The GOP has such a lock on statewide offices here that liberals tend to give more money to national Democratic candidates. Obama hit Austin pretty regularly to fill up the campaign coffers.

And all the big cities in Texas (except for Fort Worth, maybe) voted for Obama. It's just that we have vaster derpish hinterlands than most states, so our population centers aren't enough (yet) to outvote Whargarbl-Americans.

My thought is that we should let them go, and then invade them for their oil a week later.

FirstNationalBastard: Give Texas back to Mexico, wait a couple weeks, watch as they beg to return.

Problem solved.

Also tell them (before they go): You wanna leave? Fine, your part of the 2013 budget will now be split between the other 49 states.

/will see them say "Uh, wait. On second thought..."

If Texas leaves the union where will I, as a liberal Tennesseean, be able to point and laugh at someone who is more backward than my home state?

/Mississippi I'm looking at you

My favorite part is the gloating on some of the freeper sites.

LOL he HAS TO RESPOND NOW!!! HA HA WE'VE FINALLY CORNERED THAT MOOSLIM COMMIE AND WE USED HIS OWN WEBSITE TO DO IT lololololol... WHATCHA GONNA DO, BARRY?

Oh, yeah, I'm sure the White House is furious that they're going to get to tee off on crazed secessionists drunk on their own stupid. And in a public forum! Oh, no, please don't cover this, media. Please don't camp out on our website waiting for the response... that would be terrible!

doubled99: Why do so many of you have a problem with this? Let em do it.

Because the land is American. Their options are "suck it up," "die," and "leave." No one cares which they pick.

Perducci: FirstNationalBastard: Give Texas back to Mexico, wait a couple weeks, watch as they beg to return.

Problem solved.

Or let them try to survive independently. Maybe they can join with Quebec and become some sort of new superpower.

The national cuisine would be awesome. Chili Poutine with a maple glazed 20 oz. ribeye.

As long as they are willing to relocate me to city of my choice with a comparable salary and house, I'd go for it.

To: Change.org
From: Bobam­a­e­s­uohetih­wgov
Subject: Re:Seccession Petition
_____________________________________ __________________



- B

Perducci: FirstNationalBastard: Give Texas back to Mexico, wait a couple weeks, watch as they beg to return.

Problem solved.

Or let them try to survive independently. Maybe they can join with Quebec and become some sort of new superpower.