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   Finally, a petition that every Farker can get behind

13 Nov 2012 06:48 PM   |   25493 clicks   |   White House
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Langston    [TotalFark]  
That would be awesome

13 Nov 2012 02:44 PM
El_Frijole_Blanco    [TotalFark]  
I signed it

13 Nov 2012 02:45 PM
Shostie    [TotalFark]  
Goin' for the easy green, eh, subby?

13 Nov 2012 02:47 PM
ManateeGag    [TotalFark]  
ok, we can get this up to 25000 signatures.

13 Nov 2012 02:56 PM
Shostie    [TotalFark]  
I'm going to start a petition for a blowjob from Scarlett Johansson.

13 Nov 2012 02:58 PM
Blues_X    [TotalFark]  
I kind of like this one:

Make Duncan Trussell the Emperor Of Planet Earth

We petition the Obama administration to construct an iron throne made of meteorites and incinerated pope penises upon which the new emperor of planet earth Duncan Trussell can reign supreme.

Attached to the throne should be a surgical straw connected to an endless quantity of fresh fetal stem cells upon which our Lord may suckle as the people of the world petition him for mercy or offer him their children and livestock.

13 Nov 2012 02:59 PM
ManateeGag    [TotalFark]  

Shostie: I'm going to start a petition for a blowjob from Scarlett Johansson.


I don't think the federal government can grant you that. nor will you find 25000 people who want YOU to have one.

13 Nov 2012 03:05 PM
MrBallou    [TotalFark]  

ManateeGag: Shostie: I'm going to start a petition for a blowjob from Scarlett Johansson.

I don't think the federal government can grant you that. nor will you find 25000 people who want YOU to have one.


But you can find 25000 who want one.

13 Nov 2012 03:11 PM
Shostie    [TotalFark]  

ManateeGag: Shostie: I'm going to start a petition for a blowjob from Scarlett Johansson.

I don't think the federal government can grant you that. nor will you find 25000 people who want YOU to have one.


Goddamn Obama...

13 Nov 2012 03:12 PM
Cythraul     
I can just imagine how the Secret Service will react to a gathering of Farkers.

13 Nov 2012 03:14 PM
utsagrad123    [TotalFark]  

MrBallou: ManateeGag: Shostie: I'm going to start a petition for a blowjob from Scarlett Johansson.

I don't think the federal government can grant you that. nor will you find 25000 people who want YOU to have one.

But you can find 25000 who want one.


So make the petition be that every one who signs the petition will get a BJ from Scarlett. That would work. She's probably down.

13 Nov 2012 03:56 PM
Elandriel     

utsagrad123: MrBallou: ManateeGag: Shostie: I'm going to start a petition for a blowjob from Scarlett Johansson.

I don't think the federal government can grant you that. nor will you find 25000 people who want YOU to have one.

But you can find 25000 who want one.

So make the petition be that every one who signs the petition will get a BJ from Scarlett. That would work. She's probably down.


If not down, she'll be going there soon enough.

13 Nov 2012 04:14 PM
BSABSVR     
Only if the liberty derp squad has to show up too.

13 Nov 2012 04:14 PM
queezyweezel    [TotalFark]  

utsagrad123: MrBallou: ManateeGag: Shostie: I'm going to start a petition for a blowjob from Scarlett Johansson.

I don't think the federal government can grant you that. nor will you find 25000 people who want YOU to have one.

But you can find 25000 who want one.

So make the petition be that every one who signs the petition will get a BJ from Scarlett. That would work. She's probably down.


So...who wants to be #22,543?

13 Nov 2012 04:19 PM
Bathia_Mapes    [TotalFark]  
Okay, signed.

Good luck, Drew!

13 Nov 2012 04:30 PM
SilentStrider    [TotalFark]  
Yeah I'll be signing this later.

13 Nov 2012 04:35 PM
Krymson Tyde     
I signed it, but if it's a Fark party it better be in the greater Chattanooga metropolitan area so I can attend dammit!

13 Nov 2012 04:53 PM
quatchi    [TotalFark]  
Beer is good.

13 Nov 2012 04:54 PM
thismomentinblackhistory     
Just PM him on Reddit.

13 Nov 2012 05:23 PM
Ennuipoet    [TotalFark]  

thismomentinblackhistory: Just PM him on Reddit.


Actually, I suspect he trolls the Politics Tab as the Derpiest McDerpson on Fark.

13 Nov 2012 06:25 PM
bulldg4life     

Ennuipoet: thismomentinblackhistory: Just PM him on Reddit.

Actually, I suspect he trolls the Politics Tab as the Derpiest McDerpson on Fark.


Skinnyhead...

13 Nov 2012 06:49 PM
topcon     
How about have the government subsidize Give Joe the Bird so it can fill out that last $10,000 that it's been stuck on for a month.

13 Nov 2012 06:50 PM
marius2    [TotalFark]  

Shostie: Goin' for the easy green, eh, subby?


13 Nov 2012 06:50 PM
jaybeezey     
So is this going to be the new thing now, because i'm already bored with it?

13 Nov 2012 06:51 PM
skinink     
Heineken! Fark that shiat, PABST BLUE RIBBON!

13 Nov 2012 06:52 PM
ZzeusS    [TotalFark]  
I was a block away at the coffee shop when he came to Delray Beach. They said he was going to stop in, but he never did. Would have been kinda cool.

13 Nov 2012 06:52 PM
Misconduc     

Shostie: I'm going to start a petition for a blowjob from Scarlett Johansson.


This is something I can get behind, both political parties however? not so much.

13 Nov 2012 06:53 PM
Gyrfalcon     
What if we get the requisite number of signatures...and he says "OK, sure!"

13 Nov 2012 06:53 PM
meddleRPI     

ZzeusS: I was a block away at the coffee shop when he came to Delray Beach. They said he was going to stop in, but he never did. Would have been kinda cool.


Drew can be fickle like that.

13 Nov 2012 06:54 PM
Tumunga     
No. Obama's had enough beer drinking for 8 years. Obama needs to get his ass to work.

13 Nov 2012 06:55 PM
dericwater     

MrBallou: ManateeGag: Shostie: I'm going to start a petition for a blowjob from Scarlett Johansson.

I don't think the federal government can grant you that. nor will you find 25000 people who want YOU to have one.

But you can find 25000 who want one.


That'll be some amazing bukakke. Hope they record the whole thing.

13 Nov 2012 06:55 PM
imapirate    [TotalFark]  
I signed. If we can get Biden a Trans Am, we can get Drew a beer with the President. Make it happen, buttholes.

13 Nov 2012 06:55 PM
rocketpants     
The lowercase 'h' is bothering me.

13 Nov 2012 06:57 PM
edmo    [TotalFark]  
39

13 Nov 2012 07:00 PM
MixedNut     
Nope

13 Nov 2012 07:01 PM
de_Selby     
signed

13 Nov 2012 07:01 PM
Disgruntled Goat     
Might want to reword the petition to be written in proper english.

13 Nov 2012 07:06 PM
rev. dave     
Hell yeah!

13 Nov 2012 07:06 PM
Infobahn    [TotalFark]  
Just as long as the slugs at Reddit don't steal the idea. They steal everything.

/signed

13 Nov 2012 07:06 PM
Biness     
I'm going to petition that we stop petitioning.

/we're not gonna protest!

13 Nov 2012 07:07 PM
Umfufu     
Promoted on FB too :)

13 Nov 2012 07:08 PM
olddinosaur     
Sounds good to me.

The more time he spends drinking beer, the less time he has to make us all miserable.

13 Nov 2012 07:10 PM
bim1154     
Not every farker.

13 Nov 2012 07:15 PM
thisisyourbrainonFark    [TotalFark]  
Of course it contains a typo.

13 Nov 2012 07:15 PM
Lunaville     
I can't figure out what my password is.:(

13 Nov 2012 07:16 PM
reverend maynard     
Have the president to attend - Really? No need to proof read when petitioning the President. This got killed dead before it even left the ground.

13 Nov 2012 07:16 PM
The Token Man     

Disgruntled Goat: Might want to reword the petition to be written in proper english.


Seconded.

13 Nov 2012 07:17 PM
CapeFearCadaver    [TotalFark]  
Still waiting for my confirmation email so I can sign...

13 Nov 2012 07:19 PM
rocketpants     

The Token Man: Disgruntled Goat: Might want to reword the petition to be written in proper english.

Seconded.


Thirded.

Hey, maybe we should start a petition to fix the grammar in this petition.

13 Nov 2012 07:22 PM
ChubbyTiger     
NY/NJ party. He's up here often enough. And at least a few of us would pass the screening.

13 Nov 2012 07:23 PM
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