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   Every state in the Union want to secede, at which time they could form a new, united nation of states

14 Nov 2012 11:44 AM   |   8610 clicks   |   WorldNetDaily
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unlikely    [TotalFark]  
Every state in the union has a different wrong way of spelling secede. Almost makes you think they have no idea what they're talking about, no education, and no spell checker on their browsers. Seriously, seceed? Didn't you get little red zigzags under that?

14 Nov 2012 08:26 AM
Aarontology     
The issue of secession was settled when the Confederate traitors surrendered

14 Nov 2012 08:38 AM
HST's Dead Carcass    [TotalFark]  
0.01% of a population does not mean the state wants to secede.

14 Nov 2012 08:39 AM
mrshowrules    [TotalFark]  

unlikely: Every state in the union has a different wrong way of spelling secede. Almost makes you think they have no idea what they're talking about, no education, and no spell checker on their browsers. Seriously, seceed? Didn't you get little red zigzags under that?


I think they should start small by seceding from the English rules of spelling.

14 Nov 2012 08:49 AM
Generation_D    [TotalFark]  

HST's Dead Carcass: 0.01% of a population does not mean the state wants to secede.


It does mean the rest of us get to point and laugh though.

14 Nov 2012 08:50 AM
mrshowrules    [TotalFark]  

HST's Dead Carcass: 0.01% of a population does not mean the state wants to secede.


The population of Texas in 1850 was 212,592 of that on 49,323 were white male landowners so 25,000 is certainly a majority according the the Constitution.

14 Nov 2012 08:54 AM
vpb    [TotalFark]  

HST's Dead Carcass: 0.01% of a population does not mean the state wants to secede.


.001% is just 100% backward!

14 Nov 2012 08:54 AM
kronicfeld    [TotalFark]  

HST's Dead Carcass: 0.01% of a population does not mean the state wants to secede.


Gotta unskew those statisticals, broheim.

14 Nov 2012 08:57 AM
basemetal    [TotalFark]  
Meh, take everyone who signed that petition, then audit their taxes, then deport their ass.

14 Nov 2012 09:02 AM
HST's Dead Carcass    [TotalFark]  

kronicfeld: HST's Dead Carcass: 0.01% of a population does not mean the state wants to secede.

Gotta unskew those statisticals, broheim.


My bad, 0.001776% of the nation does not mean states want to secede.

14 Nov 2012 09:18 AM
mrshowrules    [TotalFark]  

basemetal: Meh, take everyone who signed that petition, then audit their taxes, then deport their ass.


Deport them between the two fence lines on the border and tell them this is New Texas.

14 Nov 2012 09:35 AM
Mugato    [TotalFark]  
Texas aside, most of the succession (succession? sec-session?) most of the states where the most talk about being treasonous pricks are the states that take the most from the Fed.

Can't we let them secede and just invade them again?

14 Nov 2012 09:38 AM
Generation_D    [TotalFark]  

Mugato: Texas aside, most of the succession (succession? sec-session?) most of the states where the most talk about being treasonous pricks are the states that take the most from the Fed.

Can't we let them secede and just invade them again?



We just got finished invading a backwards, religious dominated largely illiterate country.

14 Nov 2012 09:58 AM
tnpir    [TotalFark]  
Anyone who starts one of these petitions or, for that matter, signs one, should stand forward like a man so real, truly patriotic Americans can beat the shiat out of them.

14 Nov 2012 10:06 AM
damageddude    [TotalFark]  
As a resident of a blue state that sends way more in tax dollars to red states than we receive I say goodbye and don't let the door hit you on the way out. You can be a third world neighbor we just happen to share a continent with, a conservative's version of Canada. Don't call us, we'll call you.

14 Nov 2012 10:12 AM
FriarReb98    [TotalFark]  
Doing some math here. The smallest state, Wyoming is among these states asking for secession. 25,000 people amount to 4.4% of their total population. There's only four cities in the entire state of Wyoming that even HAVE 25,000 people in them. By way of comparison, only a quarter of the states petitioning would have 25,000 people amount to more than 1% of their population, with it getting as bad as California, where it's .00066%.

Not that this doesn't invoke at least some need to ask what the hell's going on, but still, it's not as mathematically improbable as it may seem.

14 Nov 2012 10:18 AM
Because People in power are Stupid    [TotalFark]  
Just let the Red States go.

If you love something set it free, if it comes back to you it's yours...

thecentristword.files.wordpress.comView Full Size

14 Nov 2012 10:30 AM
UberDave    [TotalFark]  

FriarReb98: Not that this doesn't invoke at least some need to ask what the hell's going on...


I'll take a wild guess that it's a bunch of teabaggers are throwing a little baby fit instead of doing something productive because the guy with the "D" next to his name won the election. If these people had any remotely logical reason why they petitioned for secession then yeah, maybe we would need to ask what is going on.

14 Nov 2012 10:32 AM
wxboy     

Because People in power are Stupid: Just let the Red States go.

If you love something set it free, if it comes back to you it's yours...

[thecentristword.files.wordpress.com image 800x588]


Can someone update this graphic for 2012? Seeing how states like New Mexico and Florida aren't "red states" by the definition of "latest presidential election".

14 Nov 2012 11:16 AM
abhorrent1     
Well, bye

14 Nov 2012 11:47 AM
FriarReb98    [TotalFark]  

wxboy: Because People in power are Stupid: Just let the Red States go.

If you love something set it free, if it comes back to you it's yours...

[thecentristword.files.wordpress.com image 800x588]

Can someone update this graphic for 2012? Seeing how states like New Mexico and Florida aren't "red states" by the definition of "latest presidential election".


The data is from 2005 based on results of the 2004 election. I'm assuming the data might be a weeeeee bit skewed now.

14 Nov 2012 11:47 AM
rufus-t-firefly     
Leave your Gadsden flags behind. Patriots fought under that flag, not biatchy whiners.

14 Nov 2012 11:48 AM
Englebert Slaptyback     

vpb


HST's Dead Carcass: 0.01% of a population does not mean the state wants to secede.

.001% is just 100% backward!


Yes. Yes, they are. 


Probably not how you meant it. Still accurate.

14 Nov 2012 11:48 AM
SwiftFox     
Lesee, two more states petitioning Congress for a constitutional convention for a balanced budget, and the whole constitution is on the table for replacement. By law.

14 Nov 2012 11:50 AM
Mantour     
texasheritagesociety.orgView Full Size


"The Republic of Texas is no more!"

14 Nov 2012 11:50 AM
Bondith     
What's this recent trend of not conjugating verbs properly?

"Every state in the Union wants to secede..."

I don't know if it's due to typos (I know my fingers will type -ed when I mean -ing), or laziness or sheer stupidity ("I don't need talk good").

I suspect it's #2.

14 Nov 2012 11:51 AM
Inquisitive Inquisitor     
No, retarded individuals in every state want to secede. There is no such petition or declaration from the states themselves.

14 Nov 2012 11:51 AM
Contents Under Pressure     
More butthurt than an altar boys' jamboree.

14 Nov 2012 11:51 AM
Znuh     
images.catholic.orgView Full Size

.

Do it. Please.

14 Nov 2012 11:51 AM
HeartBurnKid     

damageddude: As a resident of a blue state that sends way more in tax dollars to red states than we receive I say goodbye and don't let the door hit you on the way out. You can be a third world neighbor we just happen to share a continent with, a conservative's version of Canada. Don't call us, we'll call you.


Don't diss Canada like that. They're good people.

14 Nov 2012 11:51 AM
Need_MindBleach     
I lol'ed at the headline even despite the misspelling.

14 Nov 2012 11:53 AM
iheartscotch     
There are, currently, petitions circulating in 19 states; yes, exactly the ones you think.

Perhaps, if President Obama was willing to publicly pledge not to restrict gun ownership and several other issues that concern the citizens of these states; they'd stop talking about leaving the union.

/ it will never happen though

// or the reaction would be; "He gave us a pledge!? Unheard of! Absurd! He gave us a pledge!? Unheard of! Absurd!

14 Nov 2012 11:53 AM
Need_MindBleach     

Inquisitive Inquisitor: No, retarded individuals in every state want to secede. There is no such petition or declaration from the states themselves.


Finally, a dose of reality. A couple thousand people in each state are sore losers. What a surprise.

14 Nov 2012 11:54 AM
Holocaust Agnostic     
The US probably should break up.

14 Nov 2012 11:55 AM
YouAreItNoTagBacks     
WND makes it pretty clear that it's residents, not states, filing these. Every other mainstream source I've seen on FARK does a shiat job of making that distinction.

I just found myself very slightly appreciating WND...I'm going to go get drunk now.

14 Nov 2012 11:56 AM
Pants full of macaroni!!     

Holocaust Agnostic: The US probably should break up.


Or be mercy-nuked.

14 Nov 2012 11:57 AM
CitronR     

Generation_D: We just got finished invading a backwards, religious dominated largely illiterate country.


So we're well practiced and should make quick work of it?

14 Nov 2012 11:58 AM
rufus-t-firefly     
The Benedict Arnold Brigade, 101st Keyboarder Division has reported for duty.

14 Nov 2012 11:58 AM
Lionel Mandrake    [TotalFark]  
A few whiny little brats Every state in the Union want to seceed, at which time they could form a new, united nation of states

I say we carve out a little slice of northern Alaska and give it to them They can call it Loservania and establish their capital at Pussyville.

14 Nov 2012 11:59 AM
keylock71     
Yeah, no states and none of these crybabies supporting these petitions are going anywhere.

You can move yourselves and your families to another country more suited to your beliefs if you want, assholes, but your state, the land and all the infrastructure contained therein are part of the United States of America.

The ultimate expression of freedom is choosing where you live and prosper. You are quite free to relocate if the US isn't meeting your standards. I encourage you to do so, in fact... Living in another country expands a person's knowledge and understanding of the world and dispels a lot of provincial thinking common to folks who never leave their own country.

The Union will not be dissolved because a few shiat-kickers are upset the black man got re-elected. Period.

14 Nov 2012 12:00 PM
dennysgod     
Not sure what's sadder, the trolls that started these or the Right Wind media and their followers who took the bait hook, line and sinker.

/4chan+internet petition for secession = comedic gold.
//well maybe not comedic gold but mildly amusing.

14 Nov 2012 12:00 PM
Dimensio     

iheartscotch: There are, currently, petitions circulating in 19 states; yes, exactly the ones you think.

Perhaps, if President Obama was willing to publicly pledge not to restrict gun ownership and several other issues that concern the citizens of these states; they'd stop talking about leaving the union.

/ it will never happen though

// or the reaction would be; "He gave us a pledge!? Unheard of! Absurd! He gave us a pledge!? Unheard of! Absurd!


If President Obama actually endorsed a reasonable and rational position regarding firearm legislation (disavowing entirely his previous advocacy of the "assault weapons ban"), I would expect, no later than the following day, for Fox News pundits and guests to begin extolling the virtues of total civilian disarmament.

Charles Krauthammer could just re-use the editorial that he wrote in praise of the assault weapons ban in 1993.

14 Nov 2012 12:02 PM
China White Tea     

iheartscotch: There are, currently, petitions circulating in 19 states; yes, exactly the ones you think.

Perhaps, if President Obama was willing to publicly pledge not to restrict gun ownership and several other issues that concern the citizens of these states; they'd stop talking about leaving the union.

/ it will never happen though

// or the reaction would be; "He gave us a pledge!? Unheard of! Absurd! He gave us a pledge!? Unheard of! Absurd!


Because signing up for political obligations is clearly the best solution to dealing with a tiny handful of whackadoodles who can safely be ignored, right?

14 Nov 2012 12:03 PM
Hoboclown     
This is like how toddlers throw temper tantrums and threaten to run away from home, right?

So is going Galt the same as holding your breath?

14 Nov 2012 12:03 PM
Fellate O'Fish     
Every state in the Union want to seceed

English, motherfarker! Do you speak it?!!

14 Nov 2012 12:03 PM
Incontinent_dog_and_monkey_rodeo     
At his lowest point, George Bush had about a 31% approval rating. 31% of the people thought he was doing just fine. People are idiots.

14 Nov 2012 12:04 PM
Cantankerous Gnome     

iheartscotch: There are, currently, petitions circulating in 19 states; yes, exactly the ones you think.

Perhaps, if President Obama was willing to publicly pledge not to restrict gun ownership and several other issues that concern the citizens of these states; they'd stop talking about leaving the union.

/ it will never happen though

// or the reaction would be; "He gave us a pledge!? Unheard of! Absurd! He gave us a pledge!? Unheard of! Absurd!


Yeah, everyone knows they're supposed to ask permission from the Papa

14 Nov 2012 12:04 PM
Lionel Mandrake    [TotalFark]  

rufus-t-firefly: The Benedict Arnold Brigade, 101st Keyboarder Division has reported for duty.


They're so f*cking patriotic, they'll leave to prove how much they love America!

14 Nov 2012 12:04 PM
Dimensio     

Dimensio: iheartscotch: There are, currently, petitions circulating in 19 states; yes, exactly the ones you think.

Perhaps, if President Obama was willing to publicly pledge not to restrict gun ownership and several other issues that concern the citizens of these states; they'd stop talking about leaving the union.

/ it will never happen though

// or the reaction would be; "He gave us a pledge!? Unheard of! Absurd! He gave us a pledge!? Unheard of! Absurd!

If President Obama actually endorsed a reasonable and rational position regarding firearm legislation (disavowing entirely his previous advocacy of the "assault weapons ban"), I would expect, no later than the following day, for Fox News pundits and guests to begin extolling the virtues of total civilian disarmament.

Charles Krauthammer could just re-use the editorial that he wrote in praise of the assault weapons ban in 1993.


I erred in my posting. Mr. Krauthammer's editorial, titled "Disarm the Citizenry. But not yet." was actually authored in 1996.

14 Nov 2012 12:05 PM
MFAWG     
Simpson's did it

14 Nov 2012 12:07 PM
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