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   How to avoid Jury Duty: arrive disheveled, act crazy, claim you have PTSD. How to get caught avoiding Jury Duty: call in to a radio show and brag about how you got out of jury duty

14 Nov 2012 01:45 PM   |   5880 clicks   |   ABC
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Aarontology     
People who try to get out of jury duty are like people who don't vote.

They deserve no right to complain about anything the government does.

14 Nov 2012 12:40 PM
hammettman    [TotalFark]  
Half surprised she didn't ask for a trial by jury.

14 Nov 2012 12:46 PM
Marcus Aurelius    [TotalFark]  
You could always pull a Ted Nugent and just shiat yourself.

14 Nov 2012 01:00 PM
ManateeGag    [TotalFark]  
I haven't been called since I moved to Morris County. got called twice in Hudson, once they simply didn't get to my number and said anyone past X excused. the second time was right after I moved, so I was no longer a resident of the county. I'm eagerly awaiting my turn this time.

14 Nov 2012 01:09 PM
Sybarite    [TotalFark]  
cdn.buzznet.comView Full Size


"I really don't think it's fair for me to be on a jury since I'm a hologram."

14 Nov 2012 01:35 PM
wee    [TotalFark]  
It's hard to get jury duty seems like. I can't imagine having to work very hard to avoid it...

14 Nov 2012 01:44 PM
WizardofToast     

wee: It's hard to get jury duty seems like. I can't imagine having to work very hard to avoid it...


From the experiences of friends, the more you don't want to do jury duty, the more likely you'll be on it.

So act like you really want the job.

14 Nov 2012 01:47 PM
BronyMedic     
Douchebag.

One word descriptor for this individual.

14 Nov 2012 01:47 PM
wildcardjack     
I never have to worry about jury duty in a criminal trial. I've called the DA a lopsided bastard to a news camera.

14 Nov 2012 01:48 PM
Cybernetic     
I have jury duty tomorrow, so I'm getting a kick....

I've always thought that it would be interesting to serve on a jury. Which is why I probably won't get picked.

14 Nov 2012 01:49 PM
the ha ha guy     

Aarontology: People who try to get out of jury duty are like people who don't vote.

They deserve no right to complain about anything the government does.


So if someone can't afford to live on $5/day while on jury duty, they shouldn't have the right to complain?

14 Nov 2012 01:52 PM
abhorrent1     
oldnewsissoexciting.jpg

14 Nov 2012 01:52 PM
Smeggy Smurf    [TotalFark]  

wildcardjack: I never have to worry about jury duty in a criminal trial. I've called the DA a lopsided bastard to a news camera.


If I ever have to go through voir dire again I"m going to tell them I'm biased against that particular prosecutor ever since he tried to put me in jail for being sane. If it's not him, I cannot in good conscious subject another individual to the same office that tried to put me in jail for being sane.

/true story

14 Nov 2012 01:53 PM
sprag     
CSB: I got called for jury duty a couple of months ago and one of the potential jurors didn't show up. Her excuse was that she was at a bachelorette party the night before and she was pretty hung over. When the clerk informed her that it didn't matter, the juror said she was sure she was still to drunk to drive. This was on a Monday morning and the bailiff informed us that they'd be paying a visit to that young lady real soon...

14 Nov 2012 01:54 PM
justanotherfarkinfarker     
$5 a day? Where? that sucks. I think it was $50 plus I got paid by my work.

14 Nov 2012 01:54 PM
DoBeDoBeDo     

Cybernetic: I have jury duty tomorrow, so I'm getting a kick....

I've always thought that it would be interesting to serve on a jury. Which is why I probably won't get picked.


That's what got my excused last time. The actual question was "Have you ever felt that serving on a jury would be interesting?"

got excused after that round........they really don't want people they will have to sway or will put logical thought into things.

14 Nov 2012 01:54 PM
Tricky Chicken     
be an engineer

I got booted (by the defense) right away. Many engineers I know had similar experiences. I think defense lawyers have something against engineers.

14 Nov 2012 01:57 PM
scottydoesntknow    [TotalFark]  

abhorrent1: oldnewsissoexciting.jpg


Thought so too. To be fair, this is an article on the sentence she got for it.

/Could've used a "followup" tag instead

14 Nov 2012 01:57 PM
pute kisses like a man     

Aarontology: People who try to get out of jury duty are like people who don't vote.

They deserve no right to complain about anything the government does.


although, it may be the case that people who don't vote will never be called in for jury duty...

/ sloth wins once again

14 Nov 2012 01:57 PM
ThurmanMerman     
I get called for jury duty every three years, like clockwork. As soon as I tell them I'm a psychiatrist, I get dismissed by the ADA.

Who knew prosecutors didn't like psychiatrists?

14 Nov 2012 01:58 PM
MCStymie     
Currently on jury duty, well, more that I need to call for a couple more days. Pool is 250. I'm #224, and 1-153 were called in for today.

/Keeping fingers crossed to not get called in.

14 Nov 2012 01:59 PM
rev. dave     
I have served once and was dismissed during the first round a second time. The second time it would have hurt me financially and I applied for deferral first then they let me go after the first hour without anything being asked of me.

14 Nov 2012 02:00 PM
Aarontology     

the ha ha guy: So if someone can't afford to live on $5/day while on jury duty, they shouldn't have the right to complain?


Check your state's laws. Odds are your company has to pay you full wages for some of the time, and the state picks up a decent portion for the rest. Also, many states have laws that exempt anyone who would face financial hardship from serving on a jury

But let's not pretend that the people who try to get out of it are doing it for financial reasons. They're doing it because they're lazy, ignorant citizens.

pute kisses like a man: although, it may be the case that people who don't vote will never be called in for jury duty...


My state gets their potential jury pool from the DMV and tax records.

14 Nov 2012 02:00 PM
Why Would I Read the Article     
Wait a minute, there are people in this world who, upon receiving a summons in the mail, DON'T just crumple it up, toss it in the trash and never hear anything about it ever again?


Huh...ya really do learn something new every day....

14 Nov 2012 02:00 PM
Wellon Dowd     

ThurmanMerman: I get called for jury duty every three years, like clockwork. As soon as I tell them I'm a psychiatrist, I get dismissed by the ADA.


What does the American Dental Association have against psychiatrists?

14 Nov 2012 02:02 PM
scottydoesntknow    [TotalFark]  

ThurmanMerman: I get called for jury duty every three years, like clockwork. As soon as I tell them I'm a psychiatrist, I get dismissed by the ADA.

Who knew prosecutors didn't like psychiatrists?


Damn I've been called in every year for the past 5 years, right around August. Every. Single. Year.

BUT every time I've gone, they've dismissed the entire jury room before anything happens. I show up, read a couple chapters in whatever book I have, bailiff walks in and tells everyon they're free to go.

14 Nov 2012 02:02 PM
PsychoLaurie     
I've been called several times, and really want to serve on at least one jury.

But I'm always cut bc I actually *want* to be there.

Next time I'm going in kicking & screaming!! Noooooo: don't wanna be here!!

14 Nov 2012 02:03 PM
Evil Mackerel     

Cybernetic: I have jury duty tomorrow, so I'm getting a kick....

I've always thought that it would be interesting to serve on a jury. Which is why I probably won't get picked.


I've been called to serve three times and only got out of it once.I was in the middle of moving.

14 Nov 2012 02:03 PM
Random Bastage     
I just piss my pants and utter some incoherent nonsense.

14 Nov 2012 02:03 PM
4of11     

Aarontology: People who try to get out of jury duty are like people who don't vote.

They deserve no right to complain about anything the government does.


Ironically, my belief that jurists should not merely pass judgement on the evidence, but also have an actual say on what the government does, i.e., jury annulment, would surely get me excused from being on a jury.

14 Nov 2012 02:04 PM
wildcardjack     

Why Would I Read the Article: Wait a minute, there are people in this world who, upon receiving a summons in the mail, DON'T just crumple it up, toss it in the trash and never hear anything about it ever again?


Huh...ya really do learn something new every day....


Wait, people still get mail? I haven't checked my mail box in six months.

14 Nov 2012 02:06 PM
scottydoesntknow    [TotalFark]  

4of11: Aarontology: People who try to get out of jury duty are like people who don't vote.

They deserve no right to complain about anything the government does.

Ironically, my belief that jurists should not merely pass judgement on the evidence, but also have an actual say on what the government does, i.e., jury annulment, would surely get me excused from being on a jury.


Hehehe the two golden words that will get you out of any jury duty: Jury Nullification

I've actually wanted to sit in a marijuana possession trial, just so I could use that.

14 Nov 2012 02:06 PM
CapeFearCadaver    [TotalFark]  
I have a question for anyone who might know: Once you have been the victim/witness of a violent crime that has made its way through the court system do they just take your name off of the potential jurors list?

14 Nov 2012 02:07 PM
LeafyGreens     
Or you just respond to the summons by saying you're on vacation/out of the state on business.

I've been on vacation since 1994.

14 Nov 2012 02:07 PM
DeathByGeekSquad     

Aarontology: People who try to get out of jury duty are like people who don't vote.

They deserve no right to complain about anything the government does.


Actually, I reserve the right to complain because I chose not to endorse the lesser of two evils. There is a difference between being too lazy to vote, and having an actual reason to not vote. I do not trust either candidate, I am not willing to become an additional tally that they feel endorses their entire platform.

The jury reaper hasn't come knocking, but I'm actually quite curious about the process and have heard conflicting stories from various people who've been called.

14 Nov 2012 02:07 PM
thisisarepeat     
I would love to be on a jury for a case so i can finally have my chance to nullify, but with my luck it will probably be someone on trial that is even more despicable than a judge/prosecutor, they're rare, but they're out there.

14 Nov 2012 02:08 PM
LittleSmitty     
I had jury duty in 1999. It was a bizzare real estate case. I did not expect to be picked, but both attorneys were keen on me being on that jury and I was the first one agreed on.

It was interesting for about an hour. After the first break, I wanted to strangle four of the other five jurors. The Judge gave explicit instructions (don't discuss the case, don't do your own research, etc.) and of course they want to discuss the case during lunch.

A week of this boring crap and constantly trying to not be engaged by the other jurors during breaks had me pretty flustered. I was trying to take it seriously, as it was a property dispute and I wanted to make sure I understood what was going on.

Then the judge declared a mistrial after a week.

Next time I'm declaring bias and getting my happy ass outta there

14 Nov 2012 02:09 PM
BinderWoman     
"When the judge asked the entire panel if anyone had a mental illness, [Cole] stated she had difficulties getting ready in the morning, which was apparent to me by the way she was dressed."

I have jury duty in a couple of weeks. I'll have to remember that one.

14 Nov 2012 02:11 PM
JackieRabbit     
FTFA: "But her plot was foiled four months later when Judge Mansfield heard a woman bragging about how she faked mental illness to evade jury duty on a local radio show."

I didn't know that local radio shows impaneled juries. Good to know.

/prepositional phrases are hard

14 Nov 2012 02:11 PM
thisisarepeat     

DeathByGeekSquad: Aarontology: People who try to get out of jury duty are like people who don't vote.

They deserve no right to complain about anything the government does.

Actually, I reserve the right to complain because I chose not to endorse the lesser of two evils. There is a difference between being too lazy to vote, and having an actual reason to not vote. I do not trust either candidate, I am not willing to become an additional tally that they feel endorses their entire platform.

The jury reaper hasn't come knocking, but I'm actually quite curious about the process and have heard conflicting stories from various people who've been called.


Thisity farking this this.

14 Nov 2012 02:11 PM
mattharvest     

4of11: Aarontology: People who try to get out of jury duty are like people who don't vote.

They deserve no right to complain about anything the government does.

Ironically, my belief that jurists should not merely pass judgement on the evidence, but also have an actual say on what the government does, i.e., jury annulment, would surely get me excused from being on a jury.


(a) Nullification, not annulment, is the preferred term for the crime you're talking about.
(b) Nullification is, as I just said, criminal: if you swear an oath to uphold the law as instructed by the court (which is what all jurors must do) and then proceed to act in direct contradiction with the law (i.e. to refuse to find guilt because you dispute the law as opposed to the evidence) then you commit perjury. If you're open to the court (i.e. telling them that you believe in nullification) this doesn't change the fact that your Oath is violated by nullification.
(c) The next time you're proud of nullification, remember that it has been used for as much evil as good: every time a jury of Good Ol' Boys let off a Southerner who murdered a minority, it was nullification, just as much as whatever crime you're proud to ignore. If you think you're above the system of laws the rest of us abide by, you're better than any other criminal.

14 Nov 2012 02:12 PM
the ha ha guy     

Aarontology: the ha ha guy: So if someone can't afford to live on $5/day while on jury duty, they shouldn't have the right to complain?

Check your state's laws. Odds are your company has to pay you full wages for some of the time, and the state picks up a decent portion for the rest. Also, many states have laws that exempt anyone who would face financial hardship from serving on a jury

But let's not pretend that the people who try to get out of it are doing it for financial reasons. They're doing it because they're lazy, ignorant citizens.


My state has no such provision regarding employer reimbursement for time off, nor any reasonable allowance for financial hardship. If you're called, you get $5. Can't afford that? Tough.

I agree that many people don't have a legitimate reason to get out of jury duty, but I don't appreciate it when those who do have legitimate hardships are lumped together with the idiots like the one in TFA.

14 Nov 2012 02:14 PM
horslips     
After many years of avoiding jury duty, due to college, working freelance. I finally had a job which paid while I did jury duty. I was actually looking forward to serving. I was promptly dismissed for asking too many questions during selection! Tossed along with a police dispatcher and a rocket scientist.

14 Nov 2012 02:17 PM
mattharvest     

the ha ha guy: My state has no such provision regarding employer reimbursement for time off, nor any reasonable allowance for financial hardship. If you're called, you get $5. Can't afford that? Tough.


What state is this?

14 Nov 2012 02:17 PM
CheneyTheDick     
honestly, it's so easy to get out of jury duty without even lying, I don't know what the big deal is. The thing that scared me was how many people WANTED to be on a jury for the $40 a day

//yay brooklyn
/8 years til I'm called again

14 Nov 2012 02:18 PM
pottie     

Cybernetic: I have jury duty tomorrow, so I'm getting a kick....

I've always thought that it would be interesting to serve on a jury. Which is why I probably won't get picked.


I'm with you. I'd like to serve as well. I've only seen the process from one side and would like to see it from the juries' perspective. I've been called a few times, but when I show up in uniform, I'm always the first one dismissed.


/I can spot a guilty person like * snap * that!

14 Nov 2012 02:18 PM
Tango_down     
this biatch doesn't look like she has anywhere else to be.. maybe at home with her fity cats.

14 Nov 2012 02:21 PM
BronyMedic     
Want to get off a jury fast on a civil injury case?

Tell the plaintiffs lawyer you work in the medical field.

/personal experience.

14 Nov 2012 02:22 PM
Fonaibung     

Tricky Chicken: be an engineer

I got booted (by the defense) right away. Many engineers I know had similar experiences. I think defense lawyers have something against engineers.


That didn't work so well when I was selected for a 7-week murder trial a few years ago.

14 Nov 2012 02:23 PM
the ha ha guy     

mattharvest: the ha ha guy: My state has no such provision regarding employer reimbursement for time off, nor any reasonable allowance for financial hardship. If you're called, you get $5. Can't afford that? Tough.

What state is this?


http://www.harfordcountymd.gov/jurydu ty/faq.cfm

I was called in 2002. The daily rate has apparently went up since then, but everything else is just as it was when I was called.

14 Nov 2012 02:24 PM
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