(full site)
Fark.com

Try out our new mobile site!


Back To Main
   The shirtless FBI agent in the Petraeus clusterfark has been outed

15 Nov 2012 09:34 AM   |   9487 clicks   |   Yahoo
Showing 1-50 of 131 comments
Refresh Page 2
View Comments:
Nickster79    [TotalFark]  
Should have said "exposed", subby.

15 Nov 2012 09:16 AM
Cork on Fork     
I was really hoping it would be a woman... That seemed like the next logical step in this whole soap opera.

15 Nov 2012 09:38 AM
Rapmaster2000    [TotalFark]  
www.mcclaneonline.comView Full Size

I hope this doesn't impact his teaching job.

15 Nov 2012 09:38 AM
mc_madness     
I haven't been following this but what's wrong with a CIA guy enjoying pussy?

I thought most military guys liked banging male ass. This is a nice twist.

15 Nov 2012 09:38 AM
Dr Dreidel     
Was he also hatless?

15 Nov 2012 09:40 AM
bulldg4life     
Is his head misshapen?

15 Nov 2012 09:40 AM
Skleenar     
So, he's gay?

15 Nov 2012 09:41 AM
stevetherobot     
Eggcellent.

15 Nov 2012 09:42 AM
toomuchwhargarbl     
I find his paranoia that his being blocked from wasting taxpayer money on a frivolous "Cybercrimes" case involving a report of e-mail harassment to be a plot from up on high to prevent him from finding out the "Truth" about Benghazi to be appropriate grounds for immediate reassignment from FBI Agent to something more along the lines of meter maid.

15 Nov 2012 09:43 AM
rwfan     

mc_madness: I haven't been following this but what's wrong with a CIA guy enjoying pussy?

I thought most military guys liked banging male ass. This is a nice twist.


you forgot the nttiawwt

And gay farkers need to weigh in and let us know if we need to see the topless photos. I can't tell.

15 Nov 2012 09:43 AM
BolshyGreatYarblocks     

Rapmaster2000: [www.mcclaneonline.com image 405x299]
I hope this doesn't impact his teaching job.


I was thinking more of:

upload.wikimedia.orgView Full Size

15 Nov 2012 09:45 AM
Headso    [TotalFark]  
I want to care about this because it seems like it would be juicy but I can't bring myself to give a fark about it... sorry media.

15 Nov 2012 09:45 AM
HotIgneous Intruder     
Farking fascist prevert.

15 Nov 2012 09:46 AM
factoryconnection    [TotalFark]  
Well, his "cover up" paranoia was certainly well founded, what with Petraeus not having been inves... wait. Well he didn't have to appear in front of Congress over Benghaz... hold on. Well Broadwell isn't getting any scrutin... check that.

Well now his good friend Jill Kelley is persona non grata at MacDill. See! C-O-N... Spiracy!

15 Nov 2012 09:48 AM
HotIgneous Intruder     

Skleenar: So, he's gay?


Gay mafia: Gay ambassador killed ------- Gay senator outraged -------- Gay FBI agent goes all rogue.

/Gay, gay, gay.
//Dont ask!

15 Nov 2012 09:48 AM
ongbok     
Damn, even Uncle Fester is involved in this mess. Where does it end?

15 Nov 2012 09:49 AM
James F. Campbell     
From shirtless to shiatless in less than a week.

15 Nov 2012 09:49 AM
toraque    [TotalFark]  
www.squidmobile.comView Full Size


Is it just me, or is the dome of his head shifted off to one side?

Am I wrong for picturing it wobbling back and forth like a mound of jello?

15 Nov 2012 09:49 AM
factoryconnection    [TotalFark]  

Headso: I want to care about this because it seems like it would be juicy but I can't bring myself to give a fark about it... sorry media.


It is just a soap opera. I'm indulging myself with it because I don't normally follow gossip rags but there is very little "news" beyond whether Broadwell gets prosecuted for mis-handling classified information.

15 Nov 2012 09:49 AM
BitwiseShift     
Stopped reading after the word alleged was used three times by the agent's counsel. Reminds me of the time I worked for the IG and had to wear a suit -- the big joke was "What do you call a cop in a suit? Defendant." 

I do hope no one threw away the end of a career by trying to help Eric Cantor with his October Surprise. Now we all get the November, December and all of 2013 Congressional Hearing (We're too busy to do anything useful) Surprise.

15 Nov 2012 09:50 AM
the opposite of charity is justice     
crooksandliars.comView Full Size

15 Nov 2012 09:51 AM
Sofa King Smart     
he who shall not be named...

/ definitely team slytherin...

15 Nov 2012 09:52 AM
AngryJailhouseFistfark     
Mrs. JailhouseFistfark suspects this is a circle of swingers. Petraeus, the Kelley woman and her sister, General Allen, Broadwell, all of em', except maybe not Mrs. Petraeus. Or perhaps that's why she's so pissed: it's cutting into her Flag Officer Gangbang time. Rich people, high level military, and the spook community all live in these very insular worlds where they lose touch with the regular and ordinary. In fact, it is because their lives are so far from the ordinary that they are drawn to deviance. It becomes expected. The regular rules don't apply here. Nossir.

Swingers, I say. You saw the Mardi Gras pictures, right? Sure. Orgytime, only someone's gone and shiat in the hot-tub.

15 Nov 2012 09:52 AM
Diogenes    [TotalFark]  
An associate of Humphries told ABC News that it was hard to believe that Humphries had contacted elected officials about the case because "everyone knows that's professional suicide" and Humphries is "top notch."

The same could be said of Petraus.

And this guy looks like Rick Scott's twin. I wonder if the Governor underwent mitosis.

15 Nov 2012 09:54 AM
Pick13     
scifiwire.comView Full Size

15 Nov 2012 09:56 AM
trivial use of my dark powers     
Throw in a mysterious masked stranger and a couple of long-lost twins and this has the makings of a helluva telonovela.

15 Nov 2012 09:58 AM
DjangoStonereaver    [TotalFark]  
www.punditmom.comView Full Size


Doesn't see what all the fuss is about.

i.huffpost.comView Full Size


Him, neither.

15 Nov 2012 09:58 AM
Godscrack     
i.i.com.comView Full Size


I can't imagine he would be connected to any right wing hate groups.

15 Nov 2012 10:02 AM
chuckufarlie     
Can somebody explain to me how any of this is important? why should Petraeus resign for having sex with a woman that was not his wife? If everybody inside the beltway was held up to that standard, they would all have to resign. They only person that should be pissed is his wife.

15 Nov 2012 10:02 AM
Rapmaster2000    [TotalFark]  

chuckufarlie: Can somebody explain to me how any of this is important? why should Petraeus resign for having sex with a woman that was not his wife? If everybody inside the beltway was held up to that standard, they would all have to resign. They only person that should be pissed is his wife.


BEGHAZIGATE!

15 Nov 2012 10:03 AM
GrizzlyPouch     

BolshyGreatYarblocks: Rapmaster2000: [www.mcclaneonline.com image 405x299]
I hope this doesn't impact his teaching job.

I was thinking more of:


Every time I see that pic it freaks me the F out. The crazy is strong (and obviously well documented) in that guy

15 Nov 2012 10:07 AM
MadMonk     
Wow, two Rick Scotts in FL? I'm scared....very very scared.

15 Nov 2012 10:07 AM
Diogenes    [TotalFark]  

chuckufarlie: Can somebody explain to me how any of this is important? why should Petraeus resign for having sex with a woman that was not his wife? If everybody inside the beltway was held up to that standard, they would all have to resign. They only person that should be pissed is his wife.


Potential to blackmail the highest intelligence officer in the land, duh. And as I said in another thread, this whole thing has revealed some serious flaws in the system that are being overshadowed by the sleaze.

15 Nov 2012 10:07 AM
GrizzlyPouch     

chuckufarlie: Can somebody explain to me how any of this is important? why should Petraeus resign for having sex with a woman that was not his wife? If everybody inside the beltway was held up to that standard, they would all have to resign. They only person that should be pissed is his wife.


Lets say I'm a Chinese spy:

Listen up Davey boy, if you don't let me in on insert sensitive national security secret here, I'll expose your affair and ruin your personal and professional life.

Does that about sum it up?

15 Nov 2012 10:13 AM
chuckufarlie     

Diogenes: chuckufarlie: Can somebody explain to me how any of this is important? why should Petraeus resign for having sex with a woman that was not his wife? If everybody inside the beltway was held up to that standard, they would all have to resign. They only person that should be pissed is his wife.

Potential to blackmail the highest intelligence officer in the land, duh. And as I said in another thread, this whole thing has revealed some serious flaws in the system that are being overshadowed by the sleaze.


there is no potential for blackmail. We all know about it now.

As for your serious flaws idea. That is as stupid as it gets.

15 Nov 2012 10:19 AM
factoryconnection    [TotalFark]  

Diogenes: chuckufarlie: Can somebody explain to me how any of this is important? why should Petraeus resign for having sex with a woman that was not his wife? If everybody inside the beltway was held up to that standard, they would all have to resign. They only person that should be pissed is his wife.

Potential to blackmail the highest intelligence officer in the land, duh. And as I said in another thread, this whole thing has revealed some serious flaws in the system that are being overshadowed by the sleaze.


There's also the angle of "he wanted to." Perhaps he's stepping out of the spotlight not only to repair (or sever) his marriage, but also to avoid the typical chain of "denial, admission, tear-jerking press conference, worse reveal, admission, resignation in disgrace" that we see with these things. He comes out of the situation with some dignity left that could benefit him in the long term with respect to employment.

15 Nov 2012 10:21 AM
chuckufarlie     

GrizzlyPouch: chuckufarlie: Can somebody explain to me how any of this is important? why should Petraeus resign for having sex with a woman that was not his wife? If everybody inside the beltway was held up to that standard, they would all have to resign. They only person that should be pissed is his wife.

Lets say I'm a Chinese spy:

Listen up Davey boy, if you don't let me in on insert sensitive national security secret here, I'll expose your affair and ruin your personal and professional life.

Does that about sum it up?


Dp you havr evidence that this woman is a spy?

15 Nov 2012 10:22 AM
ExcaliburPrime111     

GrizzlyPouch: chuckufarlie: Can somebody explain to me how any of this is important? why should Petraeus resign for having sex with a woman that was not his wife? If everybody inside the beltway was held up to that standard, they would all have to resign. They only person that should be pissed is his wife.

Lets say I'm a Chinese spy:

Listen up Davey boy, if you don't let me in on insert sensitive national security secret here, I'll expose your affair and ruin your personal and professional life.

Does that about sum it up?


I was going to say that too, except now everyone knows about it, so a potential spy would have no leverage. As for the reasons most politicians resign during sex scandals - that is because they have betrayed the trust of their constituents. In Petraeus' case, however, he has not been elected by anyone and he has no constituency. If he can still perform his job well, why not apologize, say he'll make things up with the wife, and keep on rolling?

15 Nov 2012 10:22 AM
Deep Contact     

chuckufarlie: Can somebody explain to me how any of this is important? why should Petraeus resign for having sex with a woman that was not his wife? If everybody inside the beltway was held up to that standard, they would all have to resign. They only person that should be pissed is his wife.


They only condone torture and death.

15 Nov 2012 10:23 AM
Tat'dGreaser     
I don't think I'd ever send a shirtless picture to a family friend, that's odd.

15 Nov 2012 10:24 AM
FatherChaos     
I immediately thought of Mr. Medulla.

cfs3.tistory.comView Full Size

15 Nov 2012 10:24 AM
chuckufarlie     

ExcaliburPrime111: GrizzlyPouch: chuckufarlie: Can somebody explain to me how any of this is important? why should Petraeus resign for having sex with a woman that was not his wife? If everybody inside the beltway was held up to that standard, they would all have to resign. They only person that should be pissed is his wife.

Lets say I'm a Chinese spy:

Listen up Davey boy, if you don't let me in on insert sensitive national security secret here, I'll expose your affair and ruin your personal and professional life.

Does that about sum it up?

I was going to say that too, except now everyone knows about it, so a potential spy would have no leverage. As for the reasons most politicians resign during sex scandals - that is because they have betrayed the trust of their constituents. In Petraeus' case, however, he has not been elected by anyone and he has no constituency. If he can still perform his job well, why not apologize, say he'll make things up with the wife, and keep on rolling?


key word - potential

15 Nov 2012 10:27 AM
GrizzlyPouch     

chuckufarlie: Diogenes: chuckufarlie: Can somebody explain to me how any of this is important? why should Petraeus resign for having sex with a woman that was not his wife? If everybody inside the beltway was held up to that standard, they would all have to resign. They only person that should be pissed is his wife.

Potential to blackmail the highest intelligence officer in the land, duh. And as I said in another thread, this whole thing has revealed some serious flaws in the system that are being overshadowed by the sleaze.

there is no potential for blackmail. We all know about it now.

As for your serious flaws idea. That is as stupid as it gets.


Yo dog, I know it's tough having only 2 digits in your IQ number but....

Yes, it's exposed now. It wasn't a month ago, which is why it was a potential security threat.

15 Nov 2012 10:30 AM
DjangoStonereaver    [TotalFark]  

ExcaliburPrime111: GrizzlyPouch: chuckufarlie: Can somebody explain to me how any of this is important? why should Petraeus resign for having sex with a woman that was not his wife? If everybody inside the beltway was held up to that standard, they would all have to resign. They only person that should be pissed is his wife.

Lets say I'm a Chinese spy:

Listen up Davey boy, if you don't let me in on insert sensitive national security secret here, I'll expose your affair and ruin your personal and professional life.

Does that about sum it up?

I was going to say that too, except now everyone knows about it, so a potential spy would have no leverage. As for the reasons most politicians resign during sex scandals - that is because they have betrayed the trust of their constituents. In Petraeus' case, however, he has not been elected by anyone and he has no constituency. If he can still perform his job well, why not apologize, say he'll make things up with the wife, and keep on rolling?


An additional wrinkle here is that Petraeus could concievably be bound under the UCMJ, which has
statues prohibiting adultery among officers, though since he's retired it probably doesn't apply.

15 Nov 2012 10:30 AM
GrizzlyPouch     

chuckufarlie: ExcaliburPrime111: GrizzlyPouch: chuckufarlie: Can somebody explain to me how any of this is important? why should Petraeus resign for having sex with a woman that was not his wife? If everybody inside the beltway was held up to that standard, they would all have to resign. They only person that should be pissed is his wife.

Lets say I'm a Chinese spy:

Listen up Davey boy, if you don't let me in on insert sensitive national security secret here, I'll expose your affair and ruin your personal and professional life.

Does that about sum it up?

I was going to say that too, except now everyone knows about it, so a potential spy would have no leverage. As for the reasons most politicians resign during sex scandals - that is because they have betrayed the trust of their constituents. In Petraeus' case, however, he has not been elected by anyone and he has no constituency. If he can still perform his job well, why not apologize, say he'll make things up with the wife, and keep on rolling?

key word - potential


Well played on the troll got me.

15 Nov 2012 10:34 AM
ExcaliburPrime111     

DjangoStonereaver: ExcaliburPrime111: GrizzlyPouch: chuckufarlie: Can somebody explain to me how any of this is important? why should Petraeus resign for having sex with a woman that was not his wife? If everybody inside the beltway was held up to that standard, they would all have to resign. They only person that should be pissed is his wife.

Lets say I'm a Chinese spy:

Listen up Davey boy, if you don't let me in on insert sensitive national security secret here, I'll expose your affair and ruin your personal and professional life.

Does that about sum it up?

I was going to say that too, except now everyone knows about it, so a potential spy would have no leverage. As for the reasons most politicians resign during sex scandals - that is because they have betrayed the trust of their constituents. In Petraeus' case, however, he has not been elected by anyone and he has no constituency. If he can still perform his job well, why not apologize, say he'll make things up with the wife, and keep on rolling?

An additional wrinkle here is that Petraeus could concievably be bound under the UCMJ, which has
statues prohibiting adultery among officers, though since he's retired it probably doesn't apply.


Well, the current reports are that he only started the affair after retiring. I could see him resigning if he violated military law, but if the reports are true, there is no Article 134 violation here.

15 Nov 2012 10:35 AM
Sweaty Dynamite     
If an email essentially saying, "Stay away from my man" is enough to require a full blown FBI investigation, then how is the FBI getting anything done, what with all of the ongoing investigations I'm sure they're conducting sparked by Facebook catfights?

15 Nov 2012 10:36 AM
Diogenes    [TotalFark]  

chuckufarlie: Diogenes: chuckufarlie: Can somebody explain to me how any of this is important? why should Petraeus resign for having sex with a woman that was not his wife? If everybody inside the beltway was held up to that standard, they would all have to resign. They only person that should be pissed is his wife.

Potential to blackmail the highest intelligence officer in the land, duh. And as I said in another thread, this whole thing has revealed some serious flaws in the system that are being overshadowed by the sleaze.

there is no potential for blackmail. We all know about it now.

As for your serious flaws idea. That is as stupid as it gets.


The reason it's a career ender here is because it's a breach of protocol. Yes, in this instance, the cat's out of the bag. But the policy is in place so this shiat, and the potential for security and intelligence breaches, doesn't happen in the first place.

Your suggesting the rules are irrelevant once the transgression has occurred. THAT is as stupid as it gets.

15 Nov 2012 10:37 AM
GrizzlyPouch     

ExcaliburPrime111: GrizzlyPouch: chuckufarlie: Can somebody explain to me how any of this is important? why should Petraeus resign for having sex with a woman that was not his wife? If everybody inside the beltway was held up to that standard, they would all have to resign. They only person that should be pissed is his wife.

Lets say I'm a Chinese spy:

Listen up Davey boy, if you don't let me in on insert sensitive national security secret here, I'll expose your affair and ruin your personal and professional life.

Does that about sum it up?

I was going to say that too, except now everyone knows about it, so a potential spy would have no leverage. As for the reasons most politicians resign during sex scandals - that is because they have betrayed the trust of their constituents. In Petraeus' case, however, he has not been elected by anyone and he has no constituency. If he can still perform his job well, why not apologize, say he'll make things up with the wife, and keep on rolling?


Hm, that is a good point.

My response is he carried on the affair for months potentially exposing the country to problems. He handled himself improperly so he isn't fit to serve in the position as CIA director

15 Nov 2012 10:41 AM
wambu     

chuckufarlie: Can somebody explain to me how any of this is important? why should Petraeus resign for having sex with a woman that was not his wife? If everybody inside the beltway was held up to that standard, they would all have to resign. They only person that should be pissed is his wife.


I suspect that there were some classified documents in the Google Docs dead drop that the lovers shared or the mistress got some clasified info via pillow talk. Both are serious breaches of security, especially for the Director of the C.I.Farking.A.

My suspicion is that Petraeus was allowed cop to the lesser offense of adultery to sweep it under the rug and the decision was delayed due to political reasons. The all this wacko stuff came to light.

Electon-coverage burnot made the MSM hungry for the story. Plus it keeps getting more weird by the day what with this skinhead fool and Gen. Allen's involvement.

Many people appear to have made poor decisions along the way and I'm certain many more could be uncovered if we just looked. It's sad to think that this is the way our governmnet is run.

15 Nov 2012 10:44 AM
Showing 1-50 of 131 comments
Refresh Page 2
View Comments:
This thread is closed to new comments.


Back To Main

More Headlines:
Main | Sports | Business | Geek | Entertainment | Politics | Video | FarkUs | Contests | Fark Party | Combined