To be fair, the paperboy did make the mistake of exclaiming "Well fark me in the goat ass!" just before the whole situation began.

"...Thus solving the case of the two kids".

I owned some goats growing up.

You can't make this up becuase that is pretty much how goats act all the time. Most insane animals that I have ever been around.

Goat Butts Head of Police Stop. Imprisoned Blonde Stop. Plague Rampant in Countryside Stop.

--Evelyn Waugh
Black Mischief

(recalled from memory; maybe not an exact quote)

"It just freaked me out when it stood up on its back legs and wrapped it's front legs around me and pulled me off."

Why is this kid mad? You just got a HJ; you should be happy.

I read that as "processed goat."

You can't make this up: Utah still has actual paperboys.
/thought they went out with VCR repair shops

The goat was horny.

Utah: It's really that boring here.

Was the kid's name Harry Potter or something?

Approves

Voldemort is back at home. His owners now call Jaxon "The Boy Who Lived."

That's awesome.. :)

wants his $2

Bought this last night.




and this

"3-legged cat chases dog up tree!"

That's not possessed, that is normal goat. Possessed would be if it spoke latin and shot fire from its eyes.

Approves.

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Poor kid might of had a heartattack if he had found this up his tree!