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   After three years in the making, Ten Commandments monument at Oklahoma state capitol finally unveiled. Unfortunately during that three year period, no one ever thought to run a spell check on it

16 Nov 2012 03:48 PM   |   30590 clicks   |   KJRH Tulsa
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simplicimus     
So apparently Oklahoma is Jewish?

16 Nov 2012 11:53 AM
MaudlinMutantMollusk    [TotalFark]  
So... their tablets need to be updated?

/wait until they try the maps

16 Nov 2012 11:56 AM
AdolfOliverPanties     
Isn't there something in the Ten Commandments about graven images?

16 Nov 2012 11:58 AM
oldfarthenry    [TotalFark]  
Geez - give God a break! There was no such thing as spell-check when he gave them to Moses!

16 Nov 2012 11:58 AM
Walker    [TotalFark]  
Red state problems.

16 Nov 2012 12:01 PM
cameroncrazy1984    [TotalFark]  
It was God's will that it be misspelled.

16 Nov 2012 12:05 PM
St_Francis_P     
This certainly helps dispel the stereotypes.

16 Nov 2012 12:06 PM
simplicimus     
The design is wrong. It's two tablets, 5 on each. Did this guy even read the Old Testament?

16 Nov 2012 12:10 PM
MaudlinMutantMollusk    [TotalFark]  

simplicimus: The design is wrong. It's two tablets, 5 on each. Did this guy even read the Old Testament?


Do you think any of 'em actually read any of the book?

16 Nov 2012 12:11 PM
BunkyBrewman     
They can't even get spelling right on the Ten Commandments yet they're all experts on interpreting the entire Bible and how we all should follow its words?

16 Nov 2012 12:13 PM
simplicimus     

MaudlinMutantMollusk: simplicimus: The design is wrong. It's two tablets, 5 on each. Did this guy even read the Old Testament?

Do you think any of 'em actually read any of the book?


Probably not.

16 Nov 2012 12:13 PM
Sybarite    [TotalFark]  
It's a sad day when you can't spell as well as Ozzy Osbourne.

16 Nov 2012 12:15 PM
exick    [TotalFark]  
Why is this being done again? Oh right, Oklahoma. I still wish I could figure out what they have to do with the grounds of the capitol building, though.

16 Nov 2012 12:17 PM
Teknowaffle     
They also seemed to have forgotten about the whole "first amendment checker"

16 Nov 2012 12:20 PM
Magorn    [TotalFark]  

simplicimus: The design is wrong. It's two tablets, 5 on each. Did this guy even read the Old Testament?


Well actually THREE tablets, 5 on each, didn't you see the movie?

16 Nov 2012 12:21 PM
simplicimus     

Magorn: simplicimus: The design is wrong. It's two tablets, 5 on each. Did this guy even read the Old Testament?

Well actually THREE tablets, 5 on each, didn't you see the movie?


Yeah, I saw the movie. But on the bright side, we have 5 fewer commandments.

16 Nov 2012 12:25 PM
sweetmelissa31     
The problem didn't seem to worry Oklahoma State Representative Mike Ritze, who paid $10,000 of his own money to see the monument's creation.

Shouldn't have hired that sh*tty tattoo artist to do it, Rep Cletus.

16 Nov 2012 12:28 PM
toraque    [TotalFark]  
It's really NOT misspelled. They just went back to the original texts and translated it properly from the Pnakotic fragments.

It's not "Remember the Sabbath" it's "Remember the Shoggoth"

16 Nov 2012 12:29 PM
simplicimus     

AdolfOliverPanties: Isn't there something in the Ten Commandments about graven images?


I think that refers only to the competition, Baal and whoever else was being worshiped.

16 Nov 2012 12:29 PM
Paris1127    [TotalFark]  

simplicimus: Magorn: simplicimus: The design is wrong. It's two tablets, 5 on each. Did this guy even read the Old Testament?

Well actually THREE tablets, 5 on each, didn't you see the movie?

Yeah, I saw the movie. But on the bright side, we have 5 fewer commandments.


I wonder what was on that tablet... Perhaps a commandment about loving other people even if you disagree with him or her?

16 Nov 2012 12:30 PM
James!    [TotalFark]  
I'm not sure but I think I found another typo.  I'm pretty sure the 7th commandment isn't "Thou Shalt Get 'er Done".

16 Nov 2012 12:30 PM
St_Francis_P     

toraque: It's really NOT misspelled. They just went back to the original texts and translated it properly from the Pnakotic fragments.

It's not "Remember the Sabbath" it's "Remember the Shoggoth"


upload.wikimedia.orgView Full Size

16 Nov 2012 12:33 PM
InspectorZero     

sweetmelissa31: The problem didn't seem to worry Oklahoma State Representative Mike Ritze, who paid $10,000 of his own money to see the monument's creation.

Shouldn't have hired that sh*tty tattoo artist to do it, Rep Cletus.


I lol'd.

16 Nov 2012 12:33 PM
simplicimus     

Paris1127: simplicimus: Magorn: simplicimus: The design is wrong. It's two tablets, 5 on each. Did this guy even read the Old Testament?

Well actually THREE tablets, 5 on each, didn't you see the movie?

Yeah, I saw the movie. But on the bright side, we have 5 fewer commandments.

I wonder what was on that tablet... Perhaps a commandment about loving other people even if you disagree with him or her?


Well, the first 5 are man's relationship with God, the second 5 are man's relationship with fellow humans. No idea what would be on the third tablet.

16 Nov 2012 12:34 PM
MaudlinMutantMollusk    [TotalFark]  

simplicimus: Paris1127: simplicimus: Magorn: simplicimus: The design is wrong. It's two tablets, 5 on each. Did this guy even read the Old Testament?

Well actually THREE tablets, 5 on each, didn't you see the movie?

Yeah, I saw the movie. But on the bright side, we have 5 fewer commandments.

I wonder what was on that tablet... Perhaps a commandment about loving other people even if you disagree with him or her?

Well, the first 5 are man's relationship with God, the second 5 are man's relationship with fellow humans. No idea what would be on the third tablet.


Exceptions

16 Nov 2012 12:38 PM
Somacandra    [TotalFark]  

AdolfOliverPanties: Isn't there something in the Ten Commandments about graven images?

\
i.imgur.comView Full Size
 

Yup, that's the monument--with misspellings and all.

16 Nov 2012 12:41 PM
Somacandra    [TotalFark]  

simplicimus: Yeah, I saw the movie. But on the bright side, we have 5 fewer commandments.


Maybe you do, but the Jews have 613 commandments. That whole "Maimonides" thing.

16 Nov 2012 12:42 PM
St_Francis_P     

simplicimus: Paris1127: simplicimus: Magorn: simplicimus: The design is wrong. It's two tablets, 5 on each. Did this guy even read the Old Testament?

Well actually THREE tablets, 5 on each, didn't you see the movie?

Yeah, I saw the movie. But on the bright side, we have 5 fewer commandments.

I wonder what was on that tablet... Perhaps a commandment about loving other people even if you disagree with him or her?

Well, the first 5 are man's relationship with God, the second 5 are man's relationship with fellow humans. No idea what would be on the third tablet.


Legal disclaimers.

16 Nov 2012 12:42 PM
Somacandra    [TotalFark]  

simplicimus: Well, the first 5 are man's relationship with God, the second 5 are man's relationship with fellow humans. No idea what would be on the third tablet.


i.imgur.comView Full Size

16 Nov 2012 12:44 PM
TheCharmerUnderMe    [TotalFark]  

Somacandra: AdolfOliverPanties: Isn't there something in the Ten Commandments about graven images?
\
 

Yup, that's the monument--with misspellings and all.


I'm sorry, but is that the All-seeing Eye in the pyramid above the eagle? What the hell is THAT doing on there?

16 Nov 2012 12:51 PM
simplicimus     

St_Francis_P: simplicimus: Paris1127: simplicimus: Magorn: simplicimus: The design is wrong. It's two tablets, 5 on each. Did this guy even read the Old Testament?

Well actually THREE tablets, 5 on each, didn't you see the movie?

Yeah, I saw the movie. But on the bright side, we have 5 fewer commandments.

I wonder what was on that tablet... Perhaps a commandment about loving other people even if you disagree with him or her?

Well, the first 5 are man's relationship with God, the second 5 are man's relationship with fellow humans. No idea what would be on the third tablet.

Legal disclaimers.


* Not valid outside the middle east
* probably some EULA

16 Nov 2012 12:52 PM
MaudlinMutantMollusk    [TotalFark]  

TheCharmerUnderMe: Somacandra: AdolfOliverPanties: Isn't there something in the Ten Commandments about graven images?
\
 

Yup, that's the monument--with misspellings and all.

I'm sorry, but is that the All-seeing Eye in the pyramid above the eagle? What the hell is THAT doing on there?


Well known Christian symbol

16 Nov 2012 12:53 PM
Hetfield     
i.imgur.comView Full Size


1. It's okay to call hooters "knockers" and sometimes "snack trays."
2. It is wrong to be French.
3. It's okay to put all bad people in a giant meat grinder.
4. Lawyers: see rule three.
5. It is okay to drive a gas guzzler if it helps you get babes.
6. Everyone should car pool but me.
7. Bring back the word "stewardesses"
8. Synchronized Swimming is not a sport.
9. Mudwrestling is a sport.

16 Nov 2012 12:54 PM
simplicimus     

MaudlinMutantMollusk: TheCharmerUnderMe: Somacandra: AdolfOliverPanties: Isn't there something in the Ten Commandments about graven images?
\
 

Yup, that's the monument--with misspellings and all.

I'm sorry, but is that the All-seeing Eye in the pyramid above the eagle? What the hell is THAT doing on there?

Well known Christian symbol


Well known Masonic symbol. Also appears on the dollar.

16 Nov 2012 12:55 PM
GleeUnit     

MaudlinMutantMollusk: simplicimus: Paris1127: simplicimus: Magorn: simplicimus: The design is wrong. It's two tablets, 5 on each. Did this guy even read the Old Testament?

Well actually THREE tablets, 5 on each, didn't you see the movie?

Yeah, I saw the movie. But on the bright side, we have 5 fewer commandments.

I wonder what was on that tablet... Perhaps a commandment about loving other people even if you disagree with him or her?

Well, the first 5 are man's relationship with God, the second 5 are man's relationship with fellow humans. No idea what would be on the third tablet.

Exceptions


'm pretty sure there's something in the director's cut edition that has to do with loving thy neighbor being suspended when neighbor is gay, not stealing except when capitalism, and looking the other way about killing when the dead guy is brown

16 Nov 2012 12:55 PM
kid_icarus     

simplicimus: Paris1127: simplicimus: Magorn: simplicimus: The design is wrong. It's two tablets, 5 on each. Did this guy even read the Old Testament?

Well actually THREE tablets, 5 on each, didn't you see the movie?

Yeah, I saw the movie. But on the bright side, we have 5 fewer commandments.

I wonder what was on that tablet... Perhaps a commandment about loving other people even if you disagree with him or her?

Well, the first 5 are man's relationship with God, the second 5 are man's relationship with fellow humans. No idea what would be on the third tablet.


the fine print.

16 Nov 2012 12:56 PM
Magorn    [TotalFark]  

Paris1127: simplicimus: Magorn: simplicimus: The design is wrong. It's two tablets, 5 on each. Did this guy even read the Old Testament?

Well actually THREE tablets, 5 on each, didn't you see the movie?

Yeah, I saw the movie. But on the bright side, we have 5 fewer commandments.

I wonder what was on that tablet... Perhaps a commandment about loving other people even if you disagree with him or her?


11)Thou shalt not be a douche to your fellow man: seriously knock it off, even if they dress funny, speak a different language or have different colored skin

12) Thou shalt not try to forcefully impose your religion or morality on others: I am the lord your god, *I* got the whole revealing my will to others thing, mmkay?

13) Thou Shalt not be Smug:Before you got these tablets you were just a s big a sinner as that guy you are looking down on, so cut it out

14) IF thou seest a guy with a short mustache and a funny haircut coming to power in your country, thou shalt GTFO immediately

15) Thou shalt shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.

16 Nov 2012 12:59 PM
Somacandra    [TotalFark]  

TheCharmerUnderMe: I'm sorry, but is that the All-seeing Eye in the pyramid above the eagle? What the hell is THAT doing on there?


i.imgur.comView Full Size


Yup, that's the Masonic Eye--the eye of God as the providential Great Architect. Its on our U.S. money of course, and so I'm guessing they wanted a fusion of historically idolatrous symbols used to represent God's favor on the American Experiment. Seriously, the commandment in Exodus 20 expressly forbids making images of ANYTHING in Heaven as well as Earth. So with the Bald Eagle on there they're getting a two'fer deal.

16 Nov 2012 01:00 PM
simplicimus     

Somacandra: simplicimus: Yeah, I saw the movie. But on the bright side, we have 5 fewer commandments.

Maybe you do, but the Jews have 613 commandments. That whole "Maimonides" thing.


I have a hard enough time breaking 10 commandments. I don't think I'd live long enough to break 613 commandments.

16 Nov 2012 01:00 PM
MaudlinMutantMollusk    [TotalFark]  

simplicimus: MaudlinMutantMollusk: TheCharmerUnderMe: Somacandra: AdolfOliverPanties: Isn't there something in the Ten Commandments about graven images?
\
 

Yup, that's the monument--with misspellings and all.

I'm sorry, but is that the All-seeing Eye in the pyramid above the eagle? What the hell is THAT doing on there?

Well known Christian symbol

Well known Masonic symbol. Also appears on the dollar.


I knew that

/I'm a smartass, remember?

16 Nov 2012 01:00 PM
naughtyrev    [TotalFark]  

simplicimus: Paris1127: simplicimus: Magorn: simplicimus: The design is wrong. It's two tablets, 5 on each. Did this guy even read the Old Testament?

Well actually THREE tablets, 5 on each, didn't you see the movie?

Yeah, I saw the movie. But on the bright side, we have 5 fewer commandments.

I wonder what was on that tablet... Perhaps a commandment about loving other people even if you disagree with him or her?

Well, the first 5 are man's relationship with God, the second 5 are man's relationship with fellow humans. No idea what would be on the third tablet.


Man's relationship with animals. Indiana Santorum found the lost tablets, so he knows what he's talking about when talks about a man and a turtle.

16 Nov 2012 01:01 PM
gilgigamesh     

simplicimus: The design is wrong. It's two three two tablets, 5 on each. Did this guy even read the Old Testament?


lesposen.files.wordpress.comView Full Size

Oy.

16 Nov 2012 01:04 PM
simplicimus     

MaudlinMutantMollusk: simplicimus: MaudlinMutantMollusk: TheCharmerUnderMe: Somacandra: AdolfOliverPanties: Isn't there something in the Ten Commandments about graven images?
\
 

Yup, that's the monument--with misspellings and all.

I'm sorry, but is that the All-seeing Eye in the pyramid above the eagle? What the hell is THAT doing on there?

Well known Christian symbol

Well known Masonic symbol. Also appears on the dollar.

I knew that

/I'm a smartass, remember?


Good to know. Have you Favorited as smartass.

16 Nov 2012 01:05 PM
gilgigamesh     

Magorn: Paris1127: simplicimus: Magorn: simplicimus: The design is wrong. It's two tablets, 5 on each. Did this guy even read the Old Testament?

Well actually THREE tablets, 5 on each, didn't you see the movie?

Yeah, I saw the movie. But on the bright side, we have 5 fewer commandments.

I wonder what was on that tablet... Perhaps a commandment about loving other people even if you disagree with him or her?

11)Thou shalt not be a douche to your fellow man: seriously knock it off, even if they dress funny, speak a different language or have different colored skin

12) Thou shalt not try to forcefully impose your religion or morality on others: I am the lord your god, *I* got the whole revealing my will to others thing, mmkay?

13) Thou Shalt not be Smug:Before you got these tablets you were just a s big a sinner as that guy you are looking down on, so cut it out

14) IF thou seest a guy with a short mustache and a funny haircut coming to power in your country, thou shalt GTFO immediately

15) Thou shalt shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.


16) Thou shalt read the thread before posting your Mel Brooks jpg, to make sure your Very Clever Joke hasn't already been beaten to death long before you got here.

*shakes fist at thread*

16 Nov 2012 01:07 PM
Cyberluddite    [TotalFark]  

simplicimus: Paris1127: simplicimus: Magorn: simplicimus: The design is wrong. It's two tablets, 5 on each. Did this guy even read the Old Testament?

Well actually THREE tablets, 5 on each, didn't you see the movie?

Yeah, I saw the movie. But on the bright side, we have 5 fewer commandments.

I wonder what was on that tablet... Perhaps a commandment about loving other people even if you disagree with him or her?

Well, the first 5 are man's relationship with God, the second 5 are man's relationship with fellow humans. No idea what would be on the third tablet.


The other 5 were simply advisory, and dealt with interpersonal relationships. Some biblical scholars believe that they read as follows:

11. Favor thine brothers before harlots.
12. If there be grass on the field, though mayest play ball.
13. Stickest not thy manhood into crazy.
14. Once thou hast gone black, thou shalt not again go back.
15. Remember always: No matter how fetching appearest thy neighbor's wife or thy neighbor's maidservant, some man, somewhere, and quite possibly thy neighbor, hath grown weary of her excrement.

16 Nov 2012 01:07 PM
sweetmelissa31     
j.wigflip.comView Full Size

16 Nov 2012 01:12 PM
propasaurus    [TotalFark]  

simplicimus: Paris1127: simplicimus: Magorn: simplicimus: The design is wrong. It's two tablets, 5 on each. Did this guy even read the Old Testament?

Well actually THREE tablets, 5 on each, didn't you see the movie?

Yeah, I saw the movie. But on the bright side, we have 5 fewer commandments.

I wonder what was on that tablet... Perhaps a commandment about loving other people even if you disagree with him or her?

Well, the first 5 are man's relationship with God, the second 5 are man's relationship with fellow humans. No idea what would be on the third tablet.


Girl on girl.

16 Nov 2012 01:14 PM
Babwa Wawa     

Cyberluddite: The other 5 were simply advisory, and dealt with interpersonal relationships. Some biblical scholars believe that they read as follows:

11. Favor thine brothers before harlots.
12. If there be grass on the field, though mayest play ball.
13. Stickest not thy manhood into crazy.
14. Once thou hast gone black, thou shalt not again go back.
15. Remember always: No matter how fetching appearest thy neighbor's wife or thy neighbor's maidservant, some man, somewhere, and quite possibly thy neighbor, hath grown weary of her excrement.


+1 Internets.

16 Nov 2012 01:15 PM
propasaurus    [TotalFark]  
Thou shalt have no other gods...

Wait. There are other gods?

16 Nov 2012 01:20 PM
Tr0mBoNe    [TotalFark]  

kid_icarus: simplicimus: Paris1127: simplicimus: Magorn: simplicimus: The design is wrong. It's two tablets, 5 on each. Did this guy even read the Old Testament?

Well actually THREE tablets, 5 on each, didn't you see the movie?

Yeah, I saw the movie. But on the bright side, we have 5 fewer commandments.

I wonder what was on that tablet... Perhaps a commandment about loving other people even if you disagree with him or her?

Well, the first 5 are man's relationship with God, the second 5 are man's relationship with fellow humans. No idea what would be on the third tablet.

the fine print.


j/k

16 Nov 2012 01:23 PM
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