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   Dear Deidre: My new stepmum seduced me and my brother. What should we do now?

17 Nov 2012 07:09 PM   |   26025 clicks   |   The Sun
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St_Francis_P     
This is most certainly not a troll letter to get a rise out of Deidre.

Tell your brother that your stepmum is cheating with both of you.

Is she suggesting they could tag-team her?

17 Nov 2012 01:27 PM
PC LOAD LETTER    [TotalFark]  
Brazzers...

17 Nov 2012 01:37 PM
FloydA     
i105.photobucket.comView Full Size

17 Nov 2012 01:41 PM
Sgygus    [TotalFark]  
Dear Penthouse ...

17 Nov 2012 02:44 PM
Arthur Jumbles     
As long as it stays in the family....

17 Nov 2012 04:00 PM
Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener     

17 Nov 2012 04:08 PM
Babwa Wawa     
Dear Deidre,

Every week, the Sun gives me a sack full of cash to post their sh*tty articles, including completely contrived "advice letters" on my link aggregator. I know that this activity is incompatible with integrity, and it decreases the quality of my site, but they really are pretty sizable sacks of cash, and I need beer.

What should I do?

Drew

17 Nov 2012 04:21 PM
Man On A Mission    [TotalFark]  
Dear Deidre,
 
Every day when I visit, on my own free will, a popular news aggregator, I get so boffing mad to see links from a website that no one is forcing me to click on.  It's makes me so blitheringly insane to think that there are people who actually find entertainment in something I do not like, nay, even heartily disapprove of.
 
How do I get people to stop liking things that I don't like?
 
Babwa Wawa

17 Nov 2012 04:31 PM
GAT_00     

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: This seems tragically relevant.


No, this is relevant.

/Don't play this at work

17 Nov 2012 04:32 PM
Babwa Wawa     

Man On A Mission: Dear Deidre,
 
Every day when I visit, on my own free will, a popular news aggregator, I get so boffing mad to see links from a website that no one is forcing me to click on.  It's makes me so blitheringly insane to think that there are people who actually find entertainment in something I do not like, nay, even heartily disapprove of.
 
How do I get people to stop liking things that I don't like?
 
Babwa Wawa


Dear Deidre,

I'm having difficulty understanding the difference between a link that's greenlit because it's a legitimately popular story and an obvious fake "advice" letter greenlit solely due to a financial arrangement between a link aggregator and a content generator.

Man On A Mission

17 Nov 2012 04:36 PM
Coco LaFemme     
Dear people complaining about this greenlight,

Go stick a dildo up your ass, you don't have to read it, and it's not worth the energy it takes to care.

Coco LaFemme

17 Nov 2012 04:56 PM
sgnilward    [TotalFark]  
wat do??

Brofist!

17 Nov 2012 04:57 PM
RedPhoenix122    [TotalFark]  

Coco LaFemme: Dear people complaining about this greenlight,

Go stick a dildo up your ass, you don't have to read it, and it's not worth the energy it takes to care.

Coco LaFemme


Hell, I'm just shocked it's not a Daily Mail article.

17 Nov 2012 04:58 PM
Winterlight    [TotalFark]  
Dear Deidre,
 
I am convinced in spite of absolutely no evidence whatsoever that this site I visit is getting paid off by your site. It is absolutely inconceivable that the people visiting and running the site I visit might actually find what your site has to offer to be entertaining. 
 
How do I convince everyone else in the world to only be entertained by things I approve of?
 
Babwa Wawa

17 Nov 2012 04:58 PM
Slaxl     
Dear Santa,

I want a remote controlled car, a TV and a cat.
Thank you

Slaxl

17 Nov 2012 05:12 PM
Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener     
Dear Deidre,

HOW'M I DOING?

Former New York City Mayor Ed Koch

17 Nov 2012 05:14 PM
unyon    [TotalFark]  

Coco LaFemme: Dear people complaining about this greenlight,

Go stick a dildo up your ass, you don't have to read it, and it's not worth the energy it takes to care.

Coco LaFemme


No no, you're doing it all wrong. You're supposed to start with "Dear Dierdre", and then continue on to the dildo-ass thing in a third voice passive aggressive way.

*sigh*

17 Nov 2012 05:23 PM
Babwa Wawa     
Dear Deidre,

I'm confused by the fact that some people have noticed that the more or less the same shocking advice letter involving some level of incest is posted to the main page week after week, and have tired of it.

Is there a way that I can stop others from expressing their opinions?

Winterlight & Coco LaFemme

17 Nov 2012 05:28 PM
FloydA     
My very dear Sarah:
The indications are very strong that we shall move in a few days-perhaps tomorrow. Lest I should not be able to write again, I feel impelled to write a few lines that may fall under your eye when I shall be no more . . .

I have no misgivings about, or lack of confidence in the cause in which I am engaged, and my courage does not halt or falter. I know how strongly American Civilization now leans on the triumph of the Government and how great a debt we owe to those who went before us through the blood and sufferings of the Revolution. And I am willing-perfectly willing-to lay down all my joys in this life, to help maintain this Government, and to pay that debt

17 Nov 2012 05:30 PM
Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener     
Dear Deidre,

Now tell me who's your housekeeper and what you keep in your house? What about diamonds and gold, is that what you keep in your mouth?

What in the world is in that case, what you got in that case?

Get up out my face, you couldn't relate, wait to take place at a similar pace, so shake it, SHAKE IT.

Ludacris

17 Nov 2012 05:31 PM
wambu     
Try some different position. She sounds like a freak.

17 Nov 2012 05:43 PM
Ed Finnerty     
Dear Wincest,

Take up smoking.

Sincerely,
-Deidre

17 Nov 2012 06:35 PM
Darth_Lukecash    [TotalFark]  
Dear Deidre

Why does England seemed filled with incestious relationships?

Signed
Darth_Lukecash
Not a cannibal

17 Nov 2012 06:49 PM
Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener     
Dear Deidre,

Hello. Is it me you're looking for?

Lionel Richie

17 Nov 2012 06:52 PM
flushdepot     
Keep your frickin' mouth shut and keep poundin' that pee hole you dumbass.

17 Nov 2012 07:15 PM
B.L.Z. Bub     
Dear Buddha, please bring me a pony and a plastic rocket...

17 Nov 2012 07:16 PM
TheOther     
Tell your brother that your stepmum is cheating with on both of you with your dad.

17 Nov 2012 07:17 PM
Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener     
Dear Deidre,

Now, this is a story all about how my life got flipped, turned upside-down. And I'd like to take a minute, just sit right
there, I'll tell you how I became the prince of a town called Bel-Air.

In west Philadelphia, born and raised, on the playground is where I spent most of my days, chillin' out, maxin', relaxin' all cool, and all shootin' some b-ball outside of the school. When a couple of guys (who were up to no good) started making trouble in my neighborhood, I got one little fight and my mom got scared. She said, "You're moving with your auntie and uncle in Bel-Air."

I whistled for a cab, and when it came near, the license plate said "FRESH" and it had dice in the mirror! If anything, I can say that this cab is rare, but I thought, "Nah, forget it. Yo, homes, to Bel-Air!"

I pulled up to the house about 7 or 8, and I yelled to the cabbie, "Yo, homes, smell ya later!" I looked at my kingdom, I was finally there to sit on my throne.

The Prince of Bel-Air

17 Nov 2012 07:20 PM
Thanks for the Meme-ries     

Sgygus: Dear Penthouse ...


i291.photobucket.comView Full Size

17 Nov 2012 07:21 PM
sfpfc     
Tell your brother you dont do sloppy seconds.

17 Nov 2012 07:22 PM
coeyagi     
Dear Deidre,

Did you f*cking p'shop an emo haircut on James Franco?

Sincerely,

F*ck you

17 Nov 2012 07:22 PM
iheartscotch     
Dear people,

1) Stop sending stupid letters to the stupid old hag that hands out really bad relationship advice.

2) Stop farking everything on 2 legs; if you keep doing it, your fun bits will fall off.

Sincerely, iheartscotch

17 Nov 2012 07:24 PM
Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener     
Dear Deidre,

Yeah, I'm sorry I can't afford a Ferrari, but that don't mean I can't get you there.

I guess he's an Xbox and i'm more Atari, but the way you play your game ain't fair.

Cee-Lo Green

17 Nov 2012 07:24 PM
BlackMtnMan     
What the flippin' 'ell?

A pic of the kid and not his mum?

17 Nov 2012 07:25 PM
DoctorCal    [TotalFark]  
24.media.tumblr.comView Full Size

17 Nov 2012 07:27 PM
The One True TheDavid     
My first PIV sex was when I was around 10 1/2. Her name was Sonya, she was 12. She was quite adept because her mother was already and alcoholic and pillhead and her mother's boyfriend would disolve an additional pill or two in her daquiris. She believed the guy would ditch her mother and marry her when she was old enough. Back then wasn't aware that this was especially creepy because I'd seen plenty of cheating etc. on the soap operas my mother watched; now it strikes me as worth a few dozen lashes on the public pillory.

This strikes me as almost as creepy and still wrong. If it's real, of course.

17 Nov 2012 07:28 PM
coeyagi     

BlackMtnMan: What the flippin' 'ell?

A pic of the kid and not his mum?


4.bp.blogspot.comView Full Size


//Hot like Pol Pot

17 Nov 2012 07:28 PM
born_yesterday     
Dear Deirdre:

What's the best way to maximize your faction's strengths through the tech tree? It's pretty complicated, but I'd like to have the toughest mindworms early, since that is your faction's primary weapon. Also, is Pravin Lal as big a wuss as he seems?

Thanks,

born_yesterday

17 Nov 2012 07:29 PM
TommyDeuce     

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: Dear Deidre,

Now, this is a story all about how my life got flipped, turned upside-down. And I'd like to take a minute, just sit right
there, I'll tell you how I became the prince of a town called Bel-Air.

In west Philadelphia, born and raised, on the playground is where I spent most of my days, chillin' out, maxin', relaxin' all cool, and all shootin' some b-ball outside of the school. When a couple of guys (who were up to no good) started making trouble in my neighborhood, I got one little fight and my mom got scared. She said, "You're moving with your auntie and uncle in Bel-Air."

I whistled for a cab, and when it came near, the license plate said "FRESH" and it had dice in the mirror! If anything, I can say that this cab is rare, but I thought, "Nah, forget it. Yo, homes, to Bel-Air!"

I pulled up to the house about 7 or 8, and I yelled to the cabbie, "Yo, homes, smell ya later!" I looked at my kingdom, I was finally there to sit on my throne.

The Prince of Bel-Air


Funny, I always remember that with a different beginning.

/Quite a few, in fact
//That one's good though

17 Nov 2012 07:30 PM
MurphyMurphy     
Hey, it's all good in the family.

/or so Alabama keeps insisting

17 Nov 2012 07:30 PM
DoctorCal    [TotalFark]  

Winterlight: Dear Deidre,
 
I am convinced in spite of absolutely no evidence whatsoever that this site I visit is getting paid off by your site. It is absolutely inconceivable that the people visiting and running the site I visit might actually find what your site has to offer to be entertaining. 
 
How do I convince everyone else in the world to only be entertained by things I approve of?
 
Babwa Wawa


Frankly, you sound kind of butthurt. That isn't helping.

17 Nov 2012 07:31 PM
LovingTeacher     
Well write a letter to Penthouse Forum of course

17 Nov 2012 07:31 PM
CruJones     
Does his tattoo say "two fast..." ?

17 Nov 2012 07:32 PM
BarkingUnicorn     

Babwa Wawa: Dear Deidre,

Every week, the Sun gives me a sack full of cash to post their sh*tty articles, including completely contrived "advice letters" on my link aggregator. I know that this activity is incompatible with integrity, and it decreases the quality of my site, but they really are pretty sizable sacks of cash, and I need beer.

What should I do?

Drew


I don't think The Sun needs Drew's help badly enough to pay him for it.

17 Nov 2012 07:34 PM
Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener     

TommyDeuce: Funny, I always remember that with a different beginning.

/Quite a few, in fact
//That one's good though


There's the super-extended version of the theme song, but you don't really see that with the shows in syndication.

17 Nov 2012 07:35 PM
tb tibbles     
Dear Deidre, You won't believe what happened to me...

17 Nov 2012 07:36 PM
Hector Remarkable     
Dear Deidre,

The owner of the site Fark.com is being maligned in that he stands accused of complicity with your terrible newspaper. Whatever shall a liter do?

Sincerely,
Worried Liter

17 Nov 2012 07:36 PM
Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener     
Dear Deidre,

Who let the dogs out?

Co-signed,
The Baha Men

17 Nov 2012 07:38 PM
skinink     
Bros before hoes, bros before hoes...

17 Nov 2012 07:40 PM
cig-mkr     
Get everyone involved together and plug all three holes and make her watertight ?
Bukkake time !

17 Nov 2012 07:40 PM
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