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   U.S. Secret Service agents freak out when they mistake relatively benign water monitors for carnivorous komodo dragons... then later they all have a laugh about it over some drinks and prostitutes

18 Nov 2012 02:23 AM   |   9205 clicks   |   UPI
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WorldCitizen     
Well that's...not very interesting.

18 Nov 2012 12:09 AM
Bathia_Mapes    [TotalFark]  
Well, it's not exactly like they're trained to differentiate between the two species.

18 Nov 2012 12:20 AM
PhiloeBedoe    [TotalFark]  
In fact, forget the water monitors...
i1079.photobucket.comView Full Size

18 Nov 2012 01:11 AM
mamoru    [TotalFark]  
Komodo Island, Indonesia. Bangkok, Thailand. Meh, same difference, right? ;)

Bathia_Mapes: Well, it's not exactly like they're trained to differentiate between the two species.


Indeed. And aside from the komodo dragon, with its famous name, they probably don't know what to call any of the other large monitor lizards, or even that they are called that. I'm assuming the situation was more of a "Wow! Is that a komodo dragon?" than a "HOLY SHIAT! KOMODO DRAGON! Everybody open fire!!! *BANG* *BANG* *BANG*" type of scene.

More of a "wait, is that what I think it is?" than a freak out.

18 Nov 2012 01:37 AM
Asa Phelps    [TotalFark]  
Aren't komodo dragons mostly found on the isle of komodo?

18 Nov 2012 02:24 AM
phrawgh     

Asa Phelps: Aren't komodo dragons mostly found on the isle of komodo?


Or so they would have you believe.

18 Nov 2012 02:27 AM
othmar     
does this mean i want get a pay raise?

18 Nov 2012 02:28 AM
BoxOfBees     
So the story is the lizards, and not the worldwide expansion of the American welfare/warfare state and the continuation of US imperial hegemony at the expense of American taxpayers and increasing debt? Got it.

18 Nov 2012 02:32 AM
fusillade762    [TotalFark]  

mamoru: "Wow! Is that a komodo dragon?" than a "HOLY SHIAT! KOMODO DRAGON! Everybody open fire!!! *BANG* *BANG* *BANG*" type of scene.


Yeah, I was kinda shocked to find they didn't blow them away.

18 Nov 2012 02:33 AM
the_chief     
I found a lizard in my secret cervix.

18 Nov 2012 02:35 AM
KrispyKritter     
thekexperience.okeiweb.comView Full Size


hotrink

18 Nov 2012 02:37 AM
UsikFark     

the_chief: I found a lizard in my secret cervix.


Was it a legitimate dragon?

18 Nov 2012 02:38 AM
wildsnowllama     

Asa Phelps: Aren't komodo dragons mostly found on the isle of komodo?


Well. Sort of. It's actually more of a peninsula. And they are really not dragons as much as they are accountants. I've seemed to have taken too much of my meds... or not enough. To answer your question: three. The answer is three.

18 Nov 2012 02:39 AM
Gobobo     
Outsmarted by hookers and lizards..they should be called the Sorry Service

18 Nov 2012 02:43 AM
CPT.Goodlaw     

BoxOfBees: So the story is the lizards, and not the worldwide expansion of the American welfare/warfare state and the continuation of US imperial hegemony at the expense of American taxpayers and increasing debt? Got it.


Funny how that works, isn't it? Why are we not contracting, but instead expanding military presence?

Ugh, bring them home.

18 Nov 2012 02:44 AM
Gobobo     

wildsnowllama: Asa Phelps: Aren't komodo dragons mostly found on the isle of komodo?

Well. Sort of. It's actually more of a peninsula. And they are really not dragons as much as they are accountants. I've seemed to have taken too much of my meds... or not enough. To answer your question: three. The answer is three.


runescorpio: sabbacca: Looks like...

/puts on sunglasses

They had a birds eye view.

People always warned me that iris alot by jumping into politics blindly.


These jokes are getting cornea and cornea.

18 Nov 2012 02:48 AM
Apos     
I'd give both an extremely wide berth. Monitor lizards,while not poisonous, reportedly deliver very nasty bites when provoked.

18 Nov 2012 02:51 AM
Harry_Seldon     
4.bp.blogspot.comView Full Size


//too obscure?

18 Nov 2012 02:52 AM
MurphyMurphy     
Why the hell is it ok to publish information about where the President will be and what sites the secret service is inspecting.

I thought the whole point was they were a SECRET service. Namely, that information regarding a President's whereabouts, destinations, schedule... should be guarded and kept secret.

/In other news, General Eisenhower and his entourage toured the beaches of Normandy Friday. The beaches will be the destination for one million allied soldiers in a surprise attack on Nazi German forces on the 6th of next month.

18 Nov 2012 02:52 AM
Kevin72     

KrispyKritter: [thekexperience.okeiweb.com image 576x456]

hotrink


Those are kodomo dragons, not komodo dragons.

18 Nov 2012 03:14 AM
Molly Purebred     

MurphyMurphy: Why the hell is it ok to publish information about where the President will be and what sites the secret service is inspecting.

I thought the whole point was they were a SECRET service. Namely, that information regarding a President's whereabouts, destinations, schedule... should be guarded and kept secret.

/In other news, General Eisenhower and his entourage toured the beaches of Normandy Friday. The beaches will be the destination for one million allied soldiers in a surprise attack on Nazi German forces on the 6th of next month.


^ This ^

18 Nov 2012 03:14 AM
Rip Dashrock     
I just watched "The Freshman" with Brando, was wondering why the "komodo dragon" didn't tear them apart. Probably because it was a monitor lizard.
Who says Fark isn't edjukationil.

18 Nov 2012 03:41 AM
Gyrfalcon     

Bathia_Mapes: Well, it's not exactly like they're trained to differentiate between the two species.


Well, other than that Komodo dragons are only found, you know on the ISLAND OF KOMODO. But other than that, it's an entirely understandable mistake.

18 Nov 2012 03:48 AM
Molly Purebred     
A carnivorous, Komodo Dragon was once captured from betwixt Paris Hilton's legs; now in captivity, it has become a vegetarian. It is also rumored to be soothed by Liza Minnelli music and the musical, "Rent".

18 Nov 2012 03:57 AM
SundaesChild    [TotalFark]  
Was it a Komodo dragon in the new James Bond movie? That was my favorite part of the movie.

18 Nov 2012 04:37 AM
SundaesChild    [TotalFark]  
Oh yeah, and:

img801.imageshack.usView Full Size

18 Nov 2012 04:54 AM
Taima     

Apos: I'd give both an extremely wide berth. Monitor lizards,while not poisonous, reportedly deliver very nasty bites when provoked.


Exactly. I don't know if I would call a water monitor completely harmless. They can do some serious damage with both their bite and their tail.

After having worked in a very large pet store with numerous large reptiles, I can tell you most people don't know jack about them. I once had a woman get teary-eyed, and about had a crying fit because of our giant Galapagos Tortoise we had on display. She SWORE up and down that he should be returned to the ocean where he belonged, and that it was a crime against nature to keep him out of the water.

18 Nov 2012 04:54 AM
SundaesChild    [TotalFark]  

Taima: Apos: I'd give both an extremely wide berth. Monitor lizards,while not poisonous, reportedly deliver very nasty bites when provoked.

Exactly. I don't know if I would call a water monitor completely harmless. They can do some serious damage with both their bite and their tail.

After having worked in a very large pet store with numerous large reptiles, I can tell you most people don't know jack about them. I once had a woman get teary-eyed, and about had a crying fit because of our giant Galapagos Tortoise we had on display. She SWORE up and down that he should be returned to the ocean where he belonged, and that it was a crime against nature to keep him out of the water.


Doesn't tortoise pretty much signify land reptile? Silly lady.

18 Nov 2012 04:58 AM
LewDux     
♫There's a place called Komodo♫

18 Nov 2012 05:02 AM
Shadowtag     

BoxOfBees: So the story is the lizards, and not the worldwide expansion of the American welfare/warfare state and the continuation of US imperial hegemony at the expense of American taxpayers and increasing debt? Got it.


No, but every thread there's at least one of you bringing it up.

18 Nov 2012 05:22 AM
melkson     

Apos: I'd give both an extremely wide berth. Monitor lizards,while not poisonous, reportedly deliver very nasty bites when provoked.


so does the Majestic moose.

I actually have a 'pet' Nile monitor. As a species, monitor lizards are VERY smart, and can get REAL cranky. One as large as that pic could easily maim an adult if it was having a bad day.

Yeah, I named my cranky boy 'Vizio'. He doesn't think it's funny.

18 Nov 2012 05:47 AM
Paris1127    [TotalFark]  
upload.wikimedia.orgView Full Size
 

Close enough, I guess...

18 Nov 2012 05:47 AM
mikelepage     
images2.wikia.nocookie.netView Full Size
 

/knows the difference

18 Nov 2012 06:11 AM
ko_kyi     
The United States is interested in establishing a humanitarian and disaster relief force at U-Tapao, a naval and air force complex on the eastern seaboard built by the U.S. military during the Vietnam War.

Assuming Grievous doesn't get there first.

18 Nov 2012 06:46 AM
Jim_Callahan     

Rip Dashrock: I just watched "The Freshman" with Brando, was wondering why the "komodo dragon" didn't tear them apart. Probably because it was a monitor lizard.


Alternately, because komodo dragons don't rip anything apart until it's already dead, they typically bite their prey, infecting it with the various nasty symbiotic diseases in their mouths, then track it until it keels over and dies, or just go for injured/sick prey to begin with. And a fed Komodo Dragon doesn't usually bother attacking anything.

//Actual educational TV and such are also educational.

18 Nov 2012 07:02 AM
Day_Old_Dutchie     
Water monitor?
s11.postimage.orgView Full Size

Works for me.

18 Nov 2012 07:12 AM
alfuso     

Rip Dashrock: I just watched "The Freshman" with Brando, was wondering why the "komodo dragon" didn't tear them apart. Probably because it was a monitor lizard.
Who says Fark isn't edjukationil.


The Komodo Dragon is a type of Monitor lizard.

I believe that all of the monitor lizards can deliver a nasty bite.

18 Nov 2012 07:21 AM
Gawdzila     
"Prime Minister Yingluck Shinawatra's security detail also was planning and rehearsing for a reception for the U.S. president."

Thailand has a pretty hot PM:

www.thejakartapost.comView Full Size
images.smh.com.auView Full Size


/I'd poll her

18 Nov 2012 07:47 AM
MFAWG     

Apos: I'd give both an extremely wide berth. Monitor lizards,while not poisonous, reportedly deliver very nasty bites when provoked.


Ya, I'm good with 'HOLY shiat, HUGE ASS REPTILE FIRE!!!!!'

18 Nov 2012 07:52 AM
PunkTiger     

Day_Old_Dutchie: Water monitor?
[s11.postimage.org image 560x420]
Works for me.


Choose one: "Wow, that's a realistic screen saver." -or- "Best use for a Packard Bell monitor I've seen yet."

If they could have found a way to light the power LED, it would have been perfect.

18 Nov 2012 07:56 AM
Ihaveanevilparrot     

Taima: After having worked in a very large pet store with numerous large reptiles, I can tell you most people don't know jack about them. I once had a woman get teary-eyed, and about had a crying fit because of our giant Galapagos Tortoise we had on display. She SWORE up and down that he should be returned to the ocean where he belonged, and that it was a crime against nature to keep him out of the water.


I....I don't even....

I've heard a lot of dumb comments at pet stores, and I think that takes the cake. Seriously lady? Their feet and shell don't look remotely made for water.

Though...in a related story...
My husband works on railroad track, and wildlife is commonly encountered. Especially reptiles, because they often sun themselves on or near the track or ballast.
One of his coworkers takes interest in a box turtle. No one else pays much attention to the encounter, until he begins to carry it toward the river.
The man lifts his arm back, and only now does everyone fully realize what he's about to do. In unison the onlookers yell "noooooo!", just before *SPLOOSH* - the turtle hits the water.
He turns and says "It's a turtle...they live in the water.....Right?"

He really didn't have a clue that he wasn't helping return the thing home. They had to explain that he probably drowned it, because box turtles don't swim, and it wasn't going to be climbing up the steep muddy banks of the Mississippi river, if it could even navigate the deep and swift water in the first place.

18 Nov 2012 07:59 AM
edmo    [TotalFark]  
Sounds like they enjoyed Skyfall at any rate.

18 Nov 2012 08:22 AM
earthworm2.0     
good thread +1 would lol again.

18 Nov 2012 08:24 AM
Magorn    [TotalFark]  
l.yimg.comView Full Size

18 Nov 2012 08:49 AM
Molavian     
Damn, a military base in Thailand?

18 Nov 2012 09:45 AM
Nightsweat     

Asa Phelps: Aren't komodo dragons mostly found on the isle of komodo?


The Komodo dragon, the world's largest living lizard, is found on the steep-sloped island of Komodo ....in the lesser Sunda chain of the Indonesian Archipelago....and the nearby islands of Rinja, Padar, and Flores. We have two in this country at the National Zoo in Washington....which were given to the U.S. by the late former premier of Indonesia....Sukarno....some years ago

18 Nov 2012 10:44 AM
ShobuZukuri     
OK, lets get this over with.

This is a water monitor lizard at 6ft-43lbs


farm1.staticflickr.comView Full Size


and, this is a komodo dragon at 10ft-300lbs

phs.parkhill.k12.mo.usView Full Size

18 Nov 2012 11:17 AM
ThighsofGlory     
Big Lizard? In my back yard?

18 Nov 2012 12:24 PM
BenJammin     
Water Monitors are carnivorous too.

18 Nov 2012 12:42 PM
maddogdelta     
Those Monitors CAN be really vicious, though

4.bp.blogspot.comView Full Size

18 Nov 2012 02:41 PM
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