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  • Go shop at Walmart wanker.

  • It all starts as I take several sanitary wipes from the dispenser at the entry door so I can sanitize the handle of the cart. (Studies show that shopping cart handles are home to everything from the common cold virus to microscopic particles of fecal matter.)

    The member, who thinks they were being helpful, oftentimes acts befuddled and gives the impression of feeling slighted that I didn't hurry back like a good little sheep would do.

    This is an important step in the process of keeping the honor of free people everywhere.

    I know my rights though.


    I want to punch this douchebag directly in the face.

  • The tie screams "douchebag," but the face is more "obnoxious asshole."

    www.probolskyresearch.comView Full Size

  • From the comments:

    "What is really alarming is that he is the CEO of a company and can't even be ethical enough to honor his contract with Costco. If he refuses to honor such a small contract with easy terms, how can he be expected to ethically run his business and adhere to contracts he has with his customer base? If I were someone who was thinking about doing business with this man and I read this silly little mini-treatise of his, I would quickly turn around and walk the other way."

  • Costco does require your card to check out, so I still don't get the receipt checking thing. However, the guy's still a douchebag. I hope he has to return a big ticket item someday and sees what happens when he doesn't have his receipt.

  • What kind of a dick willingly enters into a contract that requires that do something specific, namely show their membership card and allow their receipt to be inspected and then complains about it.

    If you were to stupid to read the agreement before you signed it you deserve all the scorn heaped upon you.

    This is not some battle against the man, it is one man to stupid to read what he is signing.

  • SnarfVader: Costco does require your card to check out, so I still don't get the receipt checking thing. However, the guy's still a douchebag. I hope he has to return a big ticket item someday and sees what happens when he doesn't have his receipt.


    You don't really need a receipt to return at Costco. They scan your card to verify the purchase and last time I retuned something they offered me a credit back to my American Express, store credit, or amazingly, cash.

  • NowhereMon: SnarfVader: Costco does require your card to check out, so I still don't get the receipt checking thing. However, the guy's still a douchebag. I hope he has to return a big ticket item someday and sees what happens when he doesn't have his receipt.

    You don't really need a receipt to return at Costco. They scan your card to verify the purchase and last time I retuned something they offered me a credit back to my American Express, store credit, or amazingly, cash.


    I did not know that. Thanks.

  • That's a pretty good troll right there.

  • Pretentious douchebag asshole in orange county? this guy is just 1% more visible than the hundreds of thousands of others.

  • SnarfVader: Costco does require your card to check out, so I still don't get the receipt checking thing.


    I believe they are spot-checking the accuracy of the checkout people.

  • Oh, and I hope this pretentious middle-class dick spends a night or two in jail.

    /// Unless he is a troll, in which case he should be eaten by a grue.

  • This is how those sovereign citizen morons start out.

    /THE CAPTAIN HAS LEFT THE REGISTER! I DECLARE ADMIRALTY!

  • Ambivalence: Yes.


    This
    I have to shop at the special register as I buy smokes to sell .

  • Managed to get his work e-mail address and sent him an e-mail calling him an insufferable douche. He actually replied within a few minutes. I give him credit for that.

    Mr. Dwyer,

    I don't know you so I find it hard to take your comments seriously. However if we are trading flip remarks, I will call you a follower and a sheep who takes comfort in letting others lead while you blindly follow.

    I take issue with rules that have no real purpose or consequence. For this I do not apologize.

    Adam Probolsky

  • Hey, it takes years to reach this level of self involved, self entitled jackassery. At least he can admit it. Good on him for coming clean and coming out. Not everyone can proclaim, "I am a self involved douche" with quite such vim and vigor.

  • What a boring human being.

  • I know my rights though. Once I paid for it, I get to leave. You can't hold me hostage.
    Well fark me. Hostage ?
    This has to be one of the guys that email craigy ferg who turn out to be a tit. Or Twit.

  • Before the receipt check was in the agreement, he'd have a leg to stand on.

    Now he's just a moran.

  • Excuse me mam...where are the lamp shades??

  • Greenlight was for making The Consumerist look good by comparison, I assume.

  • Since they don't have bags at Costco, how about a Douchebox?

  • Anytime you come across a headline or subtitle in the format "One Man/Woman's Fight/Quest/Mission to [Right Some Insignificant Wrong], you know you're in the presence of epic chodeness.

  • I'd go with obnoxious douchebag.

  • Isn't he technically breaking all both of Costco's rules? What an obnoxious douchebag.

  • M11618: This d bag gives bad advice. Stores can reasonably retain you for investigative purposes if they believe you stole something, it's called shop keepers privilege. It is taught in 1st semester torts in law school. He's an idiot, don't listen to him.


    I only have cereal box GED in law from Holiday Inn Express, but isn't the important part that they have suspicion you stole something? Stopping everyone is not quite the same thing.

    Now, as it is in the agreement, none of that really matters. If you don't like being hassled leaving the store, don't shop there. That, and the fact I don't use industrial quantities of Miracle Whip, is why I stopped shopping at Sams.

  • So instead of actually making a difference by standing up for something that might be productive, you're going to be a wanker.

    Well okay then.

  • I worked for Costco, the reason they check your receipts, is because the scanners at the counter are HIGHLY sensitive. After all they are used to scan THOUSANDS of items per day, and sometimes things get spilled on them, the glass gets dirty.

    What idiot people dont understand, is the receipt checkers are there to make sure there are no DOUBLE purchases, because well lets face it 99% don't check their receipts before they leave. Problem is this causes people to return items, which usually leaves customers not very happy when they get charged for the same item TWICE and it can happen to multiple items.

    That is ALL, they are not looking for stolen items, but in fact the one month I checked receipts, I probably encountered at least 50 that had double charges, simply you go to the customer service desk and they refund the money.

    /Never shopped at Costco, if I could afford bulk food sure, but I was more on the Ramen noodle diet since costco doesn't pay jack

  • I don't do the receipt-check ritual either. If they want to revoke my membership, they're certainly within their rights to do so -- wouldn't begrudge them a bit. But, I know they won't...if they would (or could), pretty sure that would have happened by now.

  • wingnut396: M11618: This d bag gives bad advice. Stores can reasonably retain you for investigative purposes if they believe you stole something, it's called shop keepers privilege. It is taught in 1st semester torts in law school. He's an idiot, don't listen to him.

    I only have cereal box GED in law from Holiday Inn Express, but isn't the important part that they have suspicion you stole something? Stopping everyone is not quite the same thing.

    Now, as it is in the agreement, none of that really matters. If you don't like being hassled leaving the store, don't shop there. That, and the fact I don't use industrial quantities of Miracle Whip, is why I stopped shopping at Sams.


    Have you ever bathed in Miracle Whip? You're really missing out if you haven't.

  • Oh man. My mom does this at Costco. She shows her receipt on exit but refuses to get her card on entry. It used to be embarrassing but now I just flash my card and motion towards her indicating that she's with me.

    Her main reason is that her card is so deep within her purse she doesn't want to be bothered to scrounge for it.

  • I bet he parks in handicapped spaces, too.

  • Does anyone have a link to the agreement (that everyone here has apparently memorized?)

    If there is no agreement from the customer that they must show their membership card when entering the store and show their receipt when leaving, then the guy is not doing anything wrong. Granted, he might be creating an unnecessary inconvenience, and he is certainly acting pretentiously, but that's up to him. He is not trespassing in the store, nor is he stealing anything, so why should he be hassled? If there is some evidence to believe he is doing something illegal, then by all means pursue it, but otherwise, he's not doing anything wrong.

  • BarkingUnicorn: From the comments:

    "What is really alarming is that he is the CEO of a company and can't even be ethical enough to honor his contract with Costco. If he refuses to honor such a small contract with easy terms, how can he be expected to ethically run his business and adhere to contracts he has with his customer base? If I were someone who was thinking about doing business with this man and I read this silly little mini-treatise of his, I would quickly turn around and walk the other way."


    Couldn't have said it better myself. Showing your membership card at the entrance and exit is in the contract T&C. A CEO who either fails to read or understand contracts he signs is not one I would do business with.

    It also doesn't make sense to pay the membership fee if you do not utilize the store. It takes a while for the dues to pay for themselves. It sounds as if this guy doesn't understand economics either, unless he is so rich that such frivolous expenditures aren't an issue.


    /I hope that Costco seizes his membership card and revokes his account.

  • ArkAngel: Managed to get his work e-mail address and sent him an e-mail calling him an insufferable douche. He actually replied within a few minutes. I give him credit for that.

    Mr. Dwyer,

    I don't know you so I find it hard to take your comments seriously. However if we are trading flip remarks, I will call you a follower and a sheep who takes comfort in letting others lead while you blindly follow.

    I take issue with rules that have no real purpose or consequence. For this I do not apologize.

    Adam Probolsky


    That's interesting. Sounds like he really believes in what he is saying, so good for him. However, how does he know the Costco rules have no real purpose or consequence? He's only looking at it from his selfish point of view. I'm pretty sure there is a purpose for the rules from Costco's POV.

  • ExcaliburPrime111: Does anyone have a link to the agreement (that everyone here has apparently memorized?)

    If there is no agreement from the customer that they must show their membership card when entering the store and show their receipt when leaving, then the guy is not doing anything wrong. Granted, he might be creating an unnecessary inconvenience, and he is certainly acting pretentiously, but that's up to him. He is not trespassing in the store, nor is he stealing anything, so why should he be hassled? If there is some evidence to believe he is doing something illegal, then by all means pursue it, but otherwise, he's not doing anything wrong.


    Ask and ye shall receive. (new window)

  • This About That: SnarfVader: Costco does require your card to check out, so I still don't get the receipt checking thing.

    I believe they are spot-checking the accuracy of the checkout people.


    They actually found a decrepancy in a recept once for me when an item was charged twice. They sent me over to customer service where the mistake was refunded.

  • Shostie: This is how those sovereign citizen morons start out.

    /THE CAPTAIN HAS LEFT THE REGISTER! I DECLARE ADMIRALTY!


    That totally made me roffle in my waffles.

  • At least Costco (apparently) warns you about this "big brother" stuff. Fry's doesn't.

    And I don't remember signing any sort of "contract" at Fry's...


    / wussed out, handed over my receipt anyways
    // for "inspection"
    /// this is the sort of BS that really encourages people like me to shop online

  • I saw this handled creatively at one place. They had a large sign near the door that said "Customers who refuse to show their receipt at the door may not take shopping carts out of the building. Any attempt to remove a shopping cart without permission will be treated as theft and will be rigorously prosecuted."

  • Shostie: This is how those sovereign citizen morons start out.

    /THE CAPTAIN HAS LEFT THE REGISTER! I DECLARE ADMIRALTY!


    He better hope P Barnes doesn't shop there...

  • He's a floor wax AND a dessert topping!

  • Orange County? Non-story. Remember this is the home of people that call 911whem MacDonald's won't serve breakfast after 10:30.

  • LOL! Since that column appeared, nearly every one of his Tweets is a defense of it!

    I sent him a little love:

    "Congrats, your Costco brag is on Fark.com! Soon the whole world will know you're a douche. xoxo"

  • M11618: wingnut396: M11618: This d bag gives bad advice. Stores can reasonably retain you for investigative purposes if they believe you stole something, it's called shop keepers privilege. It is taught in 1st semester torts in law school. He's an idiot, don't listen to him.

    I only have cereal box GED in law from Holiday Inn Express, but isn't the important part that they have suspicion you stole something? Stopping everyone is not quite the same thing.

    Now, as it is in the agreement, none of that really matters. If you don't like being hassled leaving the store, don't shop there. That, and the fact I don't use industrial quantities of Miracle Whip, is why I stopped shopping at Sams.

    -------
    Yes they need a suspicion you stole something but I bet not showing a receipt when the contract you signed specifically says you must show a recipet is reasonable suspicion that you stole something. Obviously they can't mace or shoot you (unless you really ramp up the obnoxiousness) but they can legally hassle/annoy you enough for this really not to be worth it.


    Basically, the way the law works is this: if they detain you (and under *no* circumstance could they mace or shoot you, no matter how obnoxious you are) for fear that you stole property, one of two things will happen once the cops show up -- either you will go to jail, if the cop finds stolen merchandise, or the employee who grabbed you will, if cop doesn't find any stolen merchandise. It's really that simple.


    "Good faith" is neither justification or excuse for a false citizen arrest...

  • I always stop at Sam's to show my receipt, but the other day I was nearing the exit and someone called the doormarm away. Hey, I'll show my receipt, but I wasn't going to stand around until she came back. I was just buying fresh produce so I don't think I need their magic highlighter stripe for any returns this time.

    Their pizza combo is about the cheapest lunch in town that tastes pretty good. I learned that their take-n-bake pizzas don't fit in my home oven at my son's birthday party; had to cut it in half and bake on 2 racks.

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