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   Here's an amusement park ride where women get off before the ride is even over

20 Nov 2012 09:44 AM   |   26625 clicks   |   CafeMom
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Diogenes    [TotalFark]  
"So? How was the ride?"

"Slick!"

20 Nov 2012 09:42 AM
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L'mours     

Diogenes: "So? How was the ride?"

"Slick!"


Green tea all over keyboard

20 Nov 2012 09:49 AM
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hdhale     
In before "I'll have what she's having."

20 Nov 2012 09:50 AM
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Ennuipoet    [TotalFark]  

Diogenes: "So? How was the ride?"

"Slick!"


OK, now that was funny!

20 Nov 2012 09:50 AM
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Wellon Dowd     
Does the ride rub her back for 30 minutes before the sling-shotting begins?

20 Nov 2012 09:51 AM
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sulco     
Pfft... put her on my '39 9N to make her purr.

20 Nov 2012 09:51 AM
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Needlessly Complicated     
I want to go to there.

20 Nov 2012 09:51 AM
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John Redcorn     
Fake! Fake! Fake!

20 Nov 2012 09:51 AM
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Diogenes    [TotalFark]  
We have one here in tourist land. I think I want to try the one that's more like a swing before I take the plunge and ride the Orgasmatron.

20 Nov 2012 09:53 AM
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Tat'dGreaser     
Ah yes, the tried and true "Immaculate Orgasm" story

20 Nov 2012 09:53 AM
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GentlemanJ     
There wasn't a dry seat in the house.

20 Nov 2012 09:53 AM
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protectyourlimbs     
That's why i never let my girl ride black roller coasters...

20 Nov 2012 09:53 AM
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ManRay     
No wonder my GF loves those kind of rides so much. I'm a roller coaster man myself.

20 Nov 2012 09:54 AM
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Thelyphthoric     

GentlemanJ: There wasn't a dry seat in the house.


Shakes tiny fist

20 Nov 2012 09:55 AM
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Bondith     
I once was privy to a conversation between two girls about the effects of rides like this. One said it made her stomach lurch, as usual. The other one said she got the same effect, but lower down. There was a contemplative pause, and then I leaned forward and said "Go onnnnnn..."

She didn't.

/CSB

20 Nov 2012 09:55 AM
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jfivealive     
Told ya you could get gonorrhea from that ride

20 Nov 2012 09:55 AM
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Diogenes    [TotalFark]  

Tat'dGreaser: Ah yes, the tried and true "Immaculate Orgasm" story


Yeah...I know you're cutting a hole in the roof over your bedroom as we speak.

20 Nov 2012 09:56 AM
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LandOfChocolate     
Screamers annoy the shiat out of me, it sounds way too fake.

20 Nov 2012 09:57 AM
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padraig     
Some of them just felt like wishful thinking from the author. The others (especially the last one) seemed really fake.

20 Nov 2012 09:58 AM
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Voiceofreason01    [TotalFark]  

LandOfChocolate: Screamers annoy the shiat out of me, it sounds way too fake.


there's a good reason for that

/maybe it's just the women you've been with?

20 Nov 2012 10:00 AM
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Cheron     
FTA: I honestly and truly have no idea how I stumbled onto this bizarre little corner of YouTube

I'm guessing it has to do with your search terms. It is OK to be a pervert

20 Nov 2012 10:00 AM
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JackieRabbit     
Fark desperately needs a Bullshiat tag. Attention whores hear internet myth and makes a video where she comes on an amusement ride. Right, gotcha. I need proof. I need to go on one of these rides with said gal and have my finger in her hoo-hoo when it happens.

20 Nov 2012 10:00 AM
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Dragonflew     

padraig: Some of them just felt like wishful thinking from the author. The others (especially the last one) seemed really fake.


It's spam. There are "you can make $200 a day" annotations over three of the four videos.

20 Nov 2012 10:01 AM
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ChaoticLimbs     
You think the screamers are fake sounding? Wait till you give a screamer 11 orgasms. The twelfth can sound like gorillas having sex. The high pitched screaming gets lower and lower pitched until it's just grunting, like a gorilla's. Afterwards, she won't even know where the hell she is. It's freaking hilarious. Don't let her try to walk for 30 minutes or she'll fall down and get a nasty cut on her forehead and be suddenly completely alert and self-aware. And she'll apologize for making those noises and run into the bathroom. At least, that's been my experience.

20 Nov 2012 10:02 AM
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Feral_and_Preposterous     
You talking about Mr. Churchill?

He's good, but I didn't know anyone other my girlfriends knew about him.

20 Nov 2012 10:03 AM
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Fry's 100th Cup of Coffee     
herd.typepad.com

20 Nov 2012 10:03 AM
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gerbilpox     

Wellon Dowd: Does the ride rub her back for 30 minutes before the sling-shotting begins?


No, but it spends a hour listening to her biatch about other women at work.

20 Nov 2012 10:03 AM
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Crewmannumber6     
I honestly and truly have no idea how I stumbled onto this bizarre little corner of YouTube

You did a search with the words 'Women' and 'Orgasm' and there you were.

20 Nov 2012 10:04 AM
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operatorJzigworthy    [TotalFark]  

sulco: Pfft... put her on my '39 9N to make her purr.


I guess I've always had a secret lust for my '61 601

/however *that* works...

20 Nov 2012 10:04 AM
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Tat'dGreaser     
This thread needs that TFer who thinks he can make his girlfriend orgasm by kissing her

20 Nov 2012 10:04 AM
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kvinesknows     

Needlessly Complicated: I want to go to there.


ill take you.

no wait.. how does this creepy internet thing work?

20 Nov 2012 10:04 AM
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Tat'dGreaser     

ChaoticLimbs: You think the screamers are fake sounding? Wait till you give a screamer 11 orgasms. The twelfth can sound like gorillas having sex. The high pitched screaming gets lower and lower pitched until it's just grunting, like a gorilla's. Afterwards, she won't even know where the hell she is. It's freaking hilarious. Don't let her try to walk for 30 minutes or she'll fall down and get a nasty cut on her forehead and be suddenly completely alert and self-aware. And she'll apologize for making those noises and run into the bathroom. At least, that's been my experience.


Ummmm thanks for sharing?

20 Nov 2012 10:05 AM
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frepnog     

John Redcorn: Fake! Fake! Fake!


yeah, this. with no external stimulation (and only slight vibrations) the chances of these women actually reaching orgasm is slim to none. Once, sure, with the right person, anything is possible. This many videos, however, screams "fake".

20 Nov 2012 10:06 AM
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kvinesknows     

JackieRabbit: Fark desperately needs a Bullshiat tag. Attention whores hear internet myth and makes a video where she comes on an amusement ride. Right, gotcha. I need proof. I need to go on one of these rides with said gal and have my finger in her hoo-hoo when it happens.


pretty sure that strap would snap your finger off.

20 Nov 2012 10:06 AM
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hdhale     

ChaoticLimbs: You think the screamers are fake sounding? Wait till you give a screamer 11 orgasms. The twelfth can sound like gorillas having sex. The high pitched screaming gets lower and lower pitched until it's just grunting, like a gorilla's. Afterwards, she won't even know where the hell she is. It's freaking hilarious. Don't let her try to walk for 30 minutes or she'll fall down and get a nasty cut on her forehead and be suddenly completely alert and self-aware. And she'll apologize for making those noises and run into the bathroom. At least, that's been my experience.


The screamers are great...the moaners...ummm yeah.

/goes off to put on R.E.M.'s "Document" album and remember epic days

20 Nov 2012 10:06 AM
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Dr Dreidel    [TotalFark]  

Tat'dGreaser: This thread needs that TFer who thinks he can make his girlfriend orgasm by kissing her


I'm not that guy, but I've known several women (independent of each other) who claim to be able to get themselves off by concentrating. One, an actual ex-gf, needed some kind of stimulation (not necessarily sexual) - a plate of whipped cream was famously used to "demonstrate" the gift to several of our friends.

20 Nov 2012 10:07 AM
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kvinesknows     

frepnog: John Redcorn: Fake! Fake! Fake!

yeah, this. with no external stimulation (and only slight vibrations) the chances of these women actually reaching orgasm is slim to none. Once, sure, with the right person, anything is possible. This many videos, however, screams "fake".


the strap pulling tight across the clit mashing her own weight into it several times should pretty much count for external stimulation

20 Nov 2012 10:08 AM
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styckx     
The first, second seem close to legit(ish).

Now the third one was definitely pre-planned fake shiat.

20 Nov 2012 10:09 AM
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styckx     
kvinesknows:

clit mashing
 

I just wanted to highlight this well.. Because...

/clit mashing

20 Nov 2012 10:11 AM
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Tat'dGreaser     

Dr Dreidel: I'm not that guy, but I've known several women (independent of each other) who claim to be able to get themselves off by concentrating. One, an actual ex-gf, needed some kind of stimulation (not necessarily sexual) - a plate of whipped cream was famously used to "demonstrate" the gift to several of our friends.


And you believed them?

20 Nov 2012 10:12 AM
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Giltric     
Little known fact....the clitoris experiences vertigo.

It's one of the reasons women make horrible fighter pilots.

20 Nov 2012 10:12 AM
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fustanella     

Diogenes: "So? How was the ride?"

"Slick!"


Not much point in reading further, as it'll be all replies noting how awesome that was.

20 Nov 2012 10:12 AM
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sulco     

operatorJzigworthy: sulco: Pfft... put her on my '39 9N to make her purr.

I guess I've always had a secret lust for my '61 601

/however *that* works...


*fistbump*

The first rule of Tractor Club: Don't talk about tractor club.

20 Nov 2012 10:13 AM
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Bondith     

Tat'dGreaser: This thread needs that TFer who thinks he can make his girlfriend orgasm by kissing her


I made a girl orgasm while she was fully clothed (well, OK, her bra was hanging loose, but there was no stimulation of that area). It involved some hot and heavy dry humping through fabric...which was mostly her...hang on...

Let me start again...a girl once used my thigh to give herself an orgasm while mostly clothed.

20 Nov 2012 10:14 AM
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czei     
You know what other rides give orgasms?

www.mouseplanet.info

20 Nov 2012 10:14 AM
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db2     

frepnog: John Redcorn: Fake! Fake! Fake!

yeah, this. with no external stimulation (and only slight vibrations) the chances of these women actually reaching orgasm is slim to none. Once, sure, with the right person, anything is possible. This many videos, however, screams "fake".


There might be something to this. You've got a ride that causes a surge of adrenaline, causes disorientation, lowers blood pressure to the brain, and increases it lower in the body. Doesn't seem that absurd, I suppose.

20 Nov 2012 10:16 AM
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czetie     

ChaoticLimbs: You think the screamers are fake sounding? Wait till you give a screamer 11 orgasms. The twelfth can sound like gorillas having sex. The high pitched screaming gets lower and lower pitched until it's just grunting, like a gorilla's. Afterwards, she won't even know where the hell she is. It's freaking hilarious. Don't let her try to walk for 30 minutes or she'll fall down and get a nasty cut on her forehead and be suddenly completely alert and self-aware. And she'll apologize for making those noises and run into the bathroom. At least, that's been my experience.


That reminds me, your mom says "hi".

20 Nov 2012 10:17 AM
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Barricaded Gunman     
Hmm...

20 Nov 2012 10:17 AM
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WhippingBoy     
media.tumblr.com

20 Nov 2012 10:19 AM
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Dr Dreidel    [TotalFark]  

Tat'dGreaser: Dr Dreidel: I'm not that guy, but I've known several women (independent of each other) who claim to be able to get themselves off by concentrating. One, an actual ex-gf, needed some kind of stimulation (not necessarily sexual) - a plate of whipped cream was famously used to "demonstrate" the gift to several of our friends.

And you believed them?


Based on the flushing, and several other things I previously only noticed her doing only during "the acts", yes. While it's not inconceivable that she lied to me, it seems a pretty silly thing to lie about, especially since we'd been together 2 years at that point.

The others I've just had to take their word on.

// unscientific poll: screamers or shakers (like "epileptic in an earthquake/unbalanced washing machine")?

20 Nov 2012 10:22 AM
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