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   Deep-fry a turkey without burning down the house. Step 1: Don't invite David Byrne

20 Nov 2012 10:54 AM   |   4296 clicks   |   Today
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UberDave    [TotalFark]  
Not bad advice. To add...

They are correct about frying on a wood deck. *However*, if you know what you are doing, this shouldn't be a problem. For one thing, lay down cardboard (frying on wood or concrete) - it helps with splatters or oil drips.

If you are using a standard 36 quart fry-pot (narrow tall pot), use 3 gallons for a 12-16 pound turkey (frozen weight). I typically get 14-15 pound turkeys. 3 gallons in a 36 quart pot will pretty much cover the turkey and not splash up too much unless you have your oil too hot.

I've seen recipes call for up to 400 degrees on the oil. That is insane. For a 12-16 pound turkey, I try to cook at 325 degrees but not much higher. And you have to be attentive while it is cooking to adjust the temperature/gas. I use the range from 3 to 3.5 minutes a pound - so for 14 pounds I'll check it at 40-ish minutes.

If you want to be safe, turn off the gas at the tank right before you put the turkey in the oil. Once it is in and the oil has "settled" a little, put the grease thermometer in, and put the lid on (will not be completely on of course), and then relight the burner.

And if you want to get the most out of your turkey (no nuked meat and very juicy), take it out when the thickest part of the breast hits 165 (anything not done will become done as it sits before carving).

20 Nov 2012 10:01 AM
The Muthaship     
That should be step one for every occasion.

20 Nov 2012 10:11 AM
Dr. Farkenstein     
You might get what you're after.

20 Nov 2012 10:56 AM
The Third Man     
Are you supposed to heat the oil to THREE! HUN! DRED! SIX! TY! FIVE! DEGREES! ?

20 Nov 2012 10:57 AM
probesport     
You might get what you're after.

20 Nov 2012 10:57 AM
Okieboy     
And you may tell yourself
This is not my beautiful house

20 Nov 2012 10:57 AM
probesport     

Dr. Farkenstein: You might get what you're after.


Awesome.

20 Nov 2012 10:58 AM
ModernPrimitive01     
Never had a deep fried turkey, but since my doctor told me yesterday to watch my diet because of high blood pressure and cholesterol, that is probably a good thing

20 Nov 2012 11:00 AM
Gunny Highway     
cdn.static.ovimg.comView Full Size


Make sure he is on the scene.

20 Nov 2012 11:01 AM
Bronzemom     
This ain't no CBGB's this ain't no foulin' around.

20 Nov 2012 11:02 AM
Fark Reddit or bust     
Bravo, Subby. Bravo.

20 Nov 2012 11:02 AM
wraithmare     
Same as it ever was.

/When the oil hits the (turkey) anus.

20 Nov 2012 11:02 AM
gingerjet     

UberDave: I've seen recipes call for up to 400 degrees on the oil. That is insane. For a 12-16 pound turkey, I try to cook at 325 degrees but not much higher. And you have to be attentive while it is cooking to adjust the temperature/gas. I use the range from 3 to 3.5 minutes a pound - so for 14 pounds I'll check it at 40-ish minutes.


I heat the oil up to 400 degrees for a simple reason - when you add the turkey the oil drops in temperature a good 50 to 100 degrees. Then I just regulate the heat from there.

20 Nov 2012 11:02 AM
Ethertap     
turkey rockets in flight, trailer parks alight, trailer parks alight.

20 Nov 2012 11:03 AM
Pick     
Local Lowes has 3 gallons of peanut oil for $47.88. So, no turkey frying here. I will BBQ mine on the smoker with about $3 worth of charcoal and free wood that I cut on my property.

20 Nov 2012 11:04 AM
halfof33     
Don't drink until the oil cools?

HAHAHA!!!! Oh mercy. If the damn thing starts on fire just run, run, run, run away.

20 Nov 2012 11:10 AM
SilentStrider    [TotalFark]  
*golf clap*

20 Nov 2012 11:11 AM
groppet     
My mom got a turkey fryer in September. You dont have to go outside to use it. Its all self contained has a timer. Fried up an amazing bird for a test cook last month. I will miss the cajun injected turkey though : (

20 Nov 2012 11:12 AM
Rapmaster2000    [TotalFark]  
Cool, babies.

20 Nov 2012 11:12 AM
Clemkadidlefark     

Okieboy: And you may tell yourself
This is not my beautiful house


You may tell yourself
This is no longer my beautiful house 

Post deep fry, that is

20 Nov 2012 11:14 AM
halfof33     

groppet: I will miss the cajun injected turkey though : (


??? I inject mine every year.

20 Nov 2012 11:15 AM
UberDave    [TotalFark]  

gingerjet: UberDave: I've seen recipes call for up to 400 degrees on the oil. That is insane. For a 12-16 pound turkey, I try to cook at 325 degrees but not much higher. And you have to be attentive while it is cooking to adjust the temperature/gas. I use the range from 3 to 3.5 minutes a pound - so for 14 pounds I'll check it at 40-ish minutes.

I heat the oil up to 400 degrees for a simple reason - when you add the turkey the oil drops in temperature a good 50 to 100 degrees. Then I just regulate the heat from there.



I've never had it drop near that much when placing the turkey in. I get it up to a little above 325 and it may drop to 310 at the worst. But I do let the turkey sit for a bit (covered). And I'm living in Texas so it not being frigid-ass cold outside (like it is up North) could have something to do with it.

20 Nov 2012 11:16 AM
zato_ichi     
Anyone care to recommend a simple injection marinade? I was probably just going to do some garlic butter but am open to any other suggestions.

20 Nov 2012 11:17 AM
Sofa King Smart     
Close enough but not too far, maybe you know where you are
Fightin' fire with fire

20 Nov 2012 11:18 AM
Sofa King Smart     
People on their way to work said, "Baby what did you except?"
Gonna burst into flame

20 Nov 2012 11:19 AM
orange storm     
You can always use Alton Brown's method
makezineblog.files.wordpress.comView Full Size

20 Nov 2012 11:19 AM
UberDave    [TotalFark]  

zato_ichi: Anyone care to recommend a simple injection marinade? I was probably just going to do some garlic butter but am open to any other suggestions.



Creole Butter...by Cajun Injector, or Tony Chachere's. I've tried many others including home made. Nothing is quite as good.

I also like to give the turkey a rub of Tony Chachere's seasoning inside and out after it is injected an on the frame/stand.

20 Nov 2012 11:21 AM
rickythepenguin    [TotalFark]  
"Yeah, I'm gonna go make a solo record with Brian Eno. It will be a huge smash, and then I'll be an established artiste."

"OK Dave. Tina and I will run off to Jamaica, and dick around with this thing we call 'Tom Tom Club'. Let us know when you want to get the band back together, mmmmmkay?"

*Byrne/Eno's record does jack shiat*
*Tom Tom Club explodes*

"I really didn't appreciate that, Chris and Tina.....That was not very smart of you...."


/vaguely recall a story told by Tina where in the late 90s she ran into David Byrne at a party, he acted like he didn't know her, she went up and said "hi, my name is Tina. We used to be in a band together." and byrne icily responds, "if you say so."

20 Nov 2012 11:21 AM
hlehmann     

The Third Man: Are you supposed to heat the oil to THREE! HUN! DRED! SIX! TY! FIVE! DEGREES! ?


As a matter of fact, yes, 365 is pretty much the standard temperature I shoot for when deep frying almost anything.

20 Nov 2012 11:25 AM
Gunny Highway     

rickythepenguin: *Byrne/Eno's record does jack shiat*


Still good albums.

20 Nov 2012 11:26 AM
hlehmann     
As god is my witness, i thought turkeys could fry.

20 Nov 2012 11:27 AM
Okieboy     
Clemkadidlefark
2012-11-20 11:14:58 AM
Okieboy: And you may tell yourself
This is not my beautiful house

You may tell yourself
This is no longer my beautiful house

Post deep fry, that is

LOL good point

20 Nov 2012 11:27 AM
Danger Mouse     
I've fried many turkeys. I actually have a big after Thanksgiveing day deep frying party. In addition to frying a turkey, we'll fry just about anything we can think of: Pickles, hot dogs, deep fried butter, candy bars, cookies, vegies, french fries, bloomin onions and of course for desert deep fried ice cream.

The best advice I can give is:

The night before I fry a turkey, I'll place the turkey in the pot, fill it with enough water to cover the turkey, remove the bird and then mark where the water line is. This is the line you want to fill your oil to.

Make sure the turkey is thawed and dry.

Always turn the burner off before lowering the turkey in. It will splatter.

I too heat the oil up to about 400 before lowering the turkey in. The temps will drop 40 degrees. I then let the temp climb back up to 375. Not higher.

Oh...listen to captiankirk and make sure you have a dingle dangle...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EYkRF_ FmD40

20 Nov 2012 11:31 AM
rickythepenguin    [TotalFark]  

Gunny Highway: Still good albums.



I've never heard them as I'm not a huge TH / DB fan. But that's the narrative as I understand it. Byrne had aspirations of making a huge solo name, but then Tom Tom Club came out of nowhere and got all this glory that he had evidently/supposedly envisioned.

I know they made another 2 if not 3 albums post-tom tom club / bush of ghosts but that appears -- if i'm recalling it correctly -- to be a key moment in the band's eventual demise.

TH has a ton of great songs but I wouldn't call myself a fan.

20 Nov 2012 11:33 AM
CognaciousThunk     
Old music is old. At least use something in the past 20 years.

/I'm a Firestarter, turkey Firestarter...

20 Nov 2012 11:34 AM
Dr. Farkenstein     

probesport: Dr. Farkenstein: You might get what you're after.

Awesome.


I am an ordinary guy.

20 Nov 2012 11:45 AM
chitownmike     

CognaciousThunk: Old music is old. At least use something in the past 20 years.

/I'm a Firestarter, turkey Firestarter...


If that is within 2 decades, it's only by a narrow margin and nowhere near as iconic

20 Nov 2012 11:46 AM
BKITU    [TotalFark]  

CognaciousThunk: Old music is old. At least use something in the past 20 years.


i1.kym-cdn.comView Full Size

20 Nov 2012 11:46 AM
Gunny Highway     

rickythepenguin: TH has a ton of great songs but I wouldn't call myself a fan.


ecx.images-amazon.comView Full Size


"The Name of the Band is Talking Heads" is one of the best live albums I have ever heard. It is perfect for a party. I highly recommend it.

My understanding of the bands history is like your...DB is a dick.

20 Nov 2012 11:48 AM
CygnusDarius     

orange storm: You can always use Alton Brown's method
[makezineblog.files.wordpress.com image 498x310]


... Looks like something out of an Architecture/Engineering firm O.o

/So it must work

20 Nov 2012 11:52 AM
unchellmatt     

Pick: Local Lowes has 3 gallons of peanut oil for $47.88. So, no turkey frying here. I will BBQ mine on the smoker with about $3 worth of charcoal and free wood that I cut on my property.


And you know... I'll bet good money it's going to taste farking amazing that way.

20 Nov 2012 11:53 AM
Thoroughly With Foil     
Better take it to the reever...dip it in the waater

20 Nov 2012 11:55 AM
Broktun     

ModernPrimitive01: Never had a deep fried turkey, but since my doctor told me yesterday to watch my diet because of high blood pressure and cholesterol, that is probably a good thing


Don't fry in lard and watch the salt.

20 Nov 2012 12:00 PM
Oztemprom     
So, I just got one of the 40 quart fryers, but _I _ bought it for brewing beer.

Mrs. Temprom wants me to fry a bird in it though.

Anyone have any idea how much of a PITA it would be to scrub out all the residual oil before I boiled wort in it? Would several scrubbings with Dawn be enough or would I want some sort of commercial kitchen de-greaser?

20 Nov 2012 12:17 PM
C0rf     

Pick: I will BBQ mine on the smoker with about $3 worth of charcoal and free wood that I cut on my property.


A buddy of mine smoked his turkey last year. He saved me a vacuum bag of it in his freezer and just got around to giving it to me last week. I thawed it and piled a few slices on some bread with provolone, toasted it, and slathered on some mayo.

A++++ BEST TURKEY I HAVE EVER HAD, WOULD EAT AGAIN 

Seriously, I'm jealous. That bird is going to taste awesome.

20 Nov 2012 12:19 PM
AxL sANe     
It's WAAAY more fun and quite an amazing show to toss a frozen bird into the hot oil. Even better in the garage - the family will be impressed. Just get somone to hold your beer for you so you don't lose your grip while lobbing it in. Shirt optional.

20 Nov 2012 12:23 PM
superdude72     

ModernPrimitive01: Never had a deep fried turkey, but since my doctor told me yesterday to watch my diet because of high blood pressure and cholesterol, that is probably a good thing


Feh. Deep fried turkey isn't greasy at all--and what fat you do get from the cooking oil is unsaturated.

Deep frying causes the water in the food to steam. This is what actually cooks the food internally, since the oil doesn't penetrate the meat. The steam pushes the oil away so it can't soak into the meat.

If you want a greasy turkey,. stick it in the oven and baste it with butter.

If you need to be heart-healthy, avoid baked goods and pastry crusts, where transfats are actually a major ingredient. The oil in a deep-fried turkey is a cooking medium, not an ingredient. As the old commercial said, "The oil stays in the pan."

20 Nov 2012 12:27 PM
Danger Mouse     

Oztemprom: So, I just got one of the 40 quart fryers, but _I _ bought it for brewing beer.

Mrs. Temprom wants me to fry a bird in it though.

Anyone have any idea how much of a PITA it would be to scrub out all the residual oil before I boiled wort in it? Would several scrubbings with Dawn be enough or would I want some sort of commercial kitchen de-greaser?


You probably have a stainelss steel or aluminum pot. Cleaning the insides is easy...use a degreaser dish detergant and an SOS pad. If you burn the outside of the pot ypu;ll need some elbow grease to get it shiney again....an old boy scout trick was to coat the bottom/outside of the pan with soap. (although I never understood why the scout master made us do that while naked, and why the camera...oh well. The pots would clean up pretty easy).

20 Nov 2012 12:27 PM
Oztemprom     

Danger Mouse: Oztemprom: So, I just got one of the 40 quart fryers, but _I _ bought it for brewing beer.

Mrs. Temprom wants me to fry a bird in it though.

Anyone have any idea how much of a PITA it would be to scrub out all the residual oil before I boiled wort in it? Would several scrubbings with Dawn be enough or would I want some sort of commercial kitchen de-greaser?

You probably have a stainelss steel or aluminum pot. Cleaning the insides is easy...use a degreaser dish detergant and an SOS pad. If you burn the outside of the pot ypu;ll need some elbow grease to get it shiney again....an old boy scout trick was to coat the bottom/outside of the pan with soap. (although I never understood why the scout master made us do that while naked, and why the camera...oh well. The pots would clean up pretty easy).


Er, 30 quart fryer, and yeah, we coated the bottom of the pans with soap too, although we found that it was just as effective clothed. The camera was probably just for the flash.

/thanks

20 Nov 2012 12:35 PM
KidneyStone     
If you like fried turkey but don't want the hassle of dealing with the oil (not to mention the cost), get a Char Broil Big Easy infrared turkey fryer. They freakin ROCK. Sprinkle some spices on the bird, rub with oil, dump in the fryer and wait 12-13 minutes per pound. It's that freakin easy.

/nope, I do not work for Char Broil. I'm just that impressed with the product.

20 Nov 2012 12:37 PM
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