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   When you buy your bales of hay off of Craigslist from a farmer in Texas, sometimes he'll throw in the fire ants for free

20 Nov 2012 11:38 AM   |   4756 clicks   |   Colorado Springs Gazette
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HailRobonia     
You know what they say: the best stings in life are free!

20 Nov 2012 11:39 AM
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Nothing To See Here     
My Uncle would like that . . .

20 Nov 2012 11:40 AM
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protectyourlimbs     
Even ants are getting fired? Thanks Obama....

20 Nov 2012 11:41 AM
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nirwana     
Only good thing to ever come out of an ant hole is a cousin.

20 Nov 2012 11:42 AM
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Coolfusis     
This happens a lot for just about anything that is pulled off the ground and bailed/stacked together. We had an entire pallet of sod crawling with the things, and we didn't find out till we started laying them around the pool.

/farkers left little blisters all up my arms

20 Nov 2012 11:42 AM
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TheGreatGazoo     
Just spread fire ant killer around the bales and let winter kill the rest.

Though it isn't as bad as the load of bananas that came to the um 'ethnic' grocery store my mom worked at that had some snakes in it. The store emptied out in about 5 seconds.

20 Nov 2012 11:42 AM
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Raging Thespian    [TotalFark]  

HailRobonia: You know what they say: the best stings in life are free!


*golf clap*

20 Nov 2012 11:43 AM
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darth_badger     
bulverdepest.com

20 Nov 2012 11:44 AM
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Fry's 100th Cup of Coffee     
I, for one, salute our new ant overlords.

jmlynch.files.wordpress.com

20 Nov 2012 11:45 AM
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robohobo     
images2.wikia.nocookie.net

20 Nov 2012 11:49 AM
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JackieRabbit     
"For me, I'm probably going to go under," she said. "It's become a nightmare, a total nightmare."

Oh boo-hoo. If you buy hay off craigslist and you don't know the haymaker, you deserve to go under. Now you've introduced fire ants into your area and your neighbors will soon have just as big a problem as you do. The CO dept of agriculture should quarantine your farm and fine you.

20 Nov 2012 11:50 AM
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The Gordie Howe Hat Trick     

JackieRabbit: "For me, I'm probably going to go under," she said. "It's become a nightmare, a total nightmare."

Oh boo-hoo. If you buy hay off craigslist and you don't know the haymaker, you deserve to go under. Now you've introduced fire ants into your area and your neighbors will soon have just as big a problem as you do. The CO dept of agriculture should quarantine your farm and fine you.


Whatever ants are left probably won't survive past Monday, gonna snow with a low temp of 10 F. BUT, sounds like she got suckered, she really should have been much more careful.

20 Nov 2012 11:59 AM
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cryinoutloud     
The official gave her one more option, however. He said to feed the hay to her cattle before the spring thaw and the ants would not survive in the Colorado climate.
"I said, 'You're trying to force me to feed this hay'," said Bueche. "And he said, 'It would be easier for us.'"
...."It doesn't appear to be really high risk," Hawkins said, indicating that there did not appear to be a queen ant in the load. "Based on what we saw, there is not a colony, just some worker ants."


Feed the hay to your farking cows, the fire ants will die during the winter, and STFU. It sounds like this woman WANTS the government to come in and hassle her so she can complain.

20 Nov 2012 12:00 PM
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puppetmaster745     

20 Nov 2012 12:04 PM
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akula    [TotalFark]  

cryinoutloud: Feed the hay to your farking cows, the fire ants will die during the winter, and STFU. It sounds like this woman WANTS the government to come in and hassle her so she can complain.


She doesn't want to feed the hay to the cattle because hers are ORGANIC and the hay has been treated with CHEMICALS. Oh, the humanity.

If she's not going to use the hay for her own cattle she can sell it at a loss to somebody who doesn't give a damn. She is under the impression that she can return it for a full refund, but it sounds like she has a snowball's chance in hell at that.

20 Nov 2012 12:05 PM
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Loaf's Tray     
I used to get my hay at the grocery store like everyone else until I read about the "tan slime" that Big Straw uses to make that crap...take some time to educate yourselves and I think you'll agree that it's better to take your chances with the ants...

20 Nov 2012 12:06 PM
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JackieRabbit     

cryinoutloud: the fire ants will die during the winter


No, they won't. The ants will note the change in climate and go to ground to nest immediately. Drones will immediately begin foraging until it is too cold. They will stay underground for the winter and re-emerge in the spring. Those that don't go to ground can live quite cozily in those hay bales through the winter. No doubt about it. This lady's made a real problem for herself.

20 Nov 2012 12:08 PM
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Maud Dib     
We didn't have a lot of fire ants this year, the killer drought of 2011 killed a lot of them off.
Hate the lil' bastards.

20 Nov 2012 12:08 PM
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Click Click D'oh     

cryinoutloud: Feed the hay to your farking cows...


This.

20 Nov 2012 12:13 PM
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NMTurtlelady     
Y'know, there's a very simple solution to the problem: gasoline plus match. Fire ants, meet fire.

Chalk up the four grand you're out for the load of ant-ridden hay to a learning experience, and never buy anything from Texas ever again.

20 Nov 2012 12:15 PM
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BarkingUnicorn    [TotalFark]  
Certificate or no certificate, if the buyer can find some other people who had this problem before her and prove the seller knew about it, she wins. Otherwise, she's farked.

20 Nov 2012 12:17 PM
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Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom     
It's just fire ants. Growing up in Florida we were covered by fire ants, yellow jackets, bees, etc... you get used to it.

Well, except the yellow jackets. You never really get used to an angry swarm flying up your pants.

20 Nov 2012 12:17 PM
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ReapTheChaos     

The Gordie Howe Hat Trick: JackieRabbit: "For me, I'm probably going to go under," she said. "It's become a nightmare, a total nightmare."

Oh boo-hoo. If you buy hay off craigslist and you don't know the haymaker, you deserve to go under. Now you've introduced fire ants into your area and your neighbors will soon have just as big a problem as you do. The CO dept of agriculture should quarantine your farm and fine you.

Whatever ants are left probably won't survive past Monday, gonna snow with a low temp of 10 F. BUT, sounds like she got suckered, she really should have been much more careful.


If all it took was a little cold weather then fire ants wouldn't be the problem they are.

20 Nov 2012 12:19 PM
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barc0001     

ReapTheChaos:

If all it took was a little cold weather then fire ants wouldn't be the problem they are.


www.ars.usda.gov

This map would tend to disagree with your assessment of fire ants and their love of winter. Note the places where there are no dots correlates strongly where things get cold?

20 Nov 2012 12:33 PM
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cryinoutloud     

JackieRabbit: cryinoutloud: the fire ants will die during the winter
No, they won't. The ants will note the change in climate and go to ground to nest immediately. Drones will immediately begin foraging until it is too cold. They will stay underground for the winter and re-emerge in the spring. Those that don't go to ground can live quite cozily in those hay bales through the winter. No doubt about it. This lady's made a real problem for herself.


If that was true, then we'd be totally infested with critters from all parts of the world, who can survive anywhere as long as they can be transported there. Fire ants are pretty well documented and while they're creeping northwards, they don't live in Colorado very well.

The "official" line is that they will all die over the winter. They're giving her an out. But she sounds so stupid, she'll probably keep the hay there and alert the authorities next spring when she's both out $4000 worth of hay and has a fire ant infestation.

There are also legions of people who think that any ant of a certain size is a "fire ant" and they go around killing any ant that builds mounds. Nothing to do with the story, it's just a pet peeve of mine. How much you want to bet that the woman alerts the media next spring when, sure as shiat, she has a big "fire ant" problem?

And it's entirely her problem if she bought hay with pesticides in it for her "organic" cows.

20 Nov 2012 12:49 PM
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Day_Old_Dutchie     

robohobo: [images2.wikia.nocookie.net image 250x188]


FAR ants.

20 Nov 2012 12:49 PM
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JackieRabbit     

barc0001: ReapTheChaos:

If all it took was a little cold weather then fire ants wouldn't be the problem they are.

[www.ars.usda.gov image 510x322]

This map would tend to disagree with your assessment of fire ants and their love of winter. Note the places where there are no dots correlates strongly where things get cold?


Fire ants can and have adapted to cold climates. The map you posted doesn't have much to do with cold temperatures. This is just where the ants have already colonized and the extent to which they have become firmly established. Eradication programs and quantantines have slowed their progress, but they continue to move northward at a steady rate.

Fire ants aren't actually ants, but a kind of wingless wasp. They have stingers and will hold there victim with their mandibles and sting it several times in a circular motion. One ant may sting up to a dozen times and the soldiers attack in the hundreds. They are nasty little critters, to be sure.

20 Nov 2012 12:50 PM
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The Gordie Howe Hat Trick     
To be fair, I know exactly dick about ranching, but I have a very good buddy who runs several hundred head of cattle in Wyoming, which is a tough place to ranch.

As far as organic beef, his family tried to do that a few years ago, but the sharp increase in expenses completely overshadowed the slight premium in sale price. Unless you have a known brand name like Niemann Ranch.

Hopefully the Killer Bees will kill off the Fire Ants in the battle for indigenous invader supremacy.

20 Nov 2012 01:08 PM
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Happy Hours     

barc0001: ReapTheChaos:

If all it took was a little cold weather then fire ants wouldn't be the problem they are.

[www.ars.usda.gov image 510x322]

This map would tend to disagree with your assessment of fire ants and their love of winter. Note the places where there are no dots correlates strongly where things get cold?


Very interesting, but I'm curious to now why the ants seem to recognize state borders.

20 Nov 2012 02:03 PM
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swangoatman     
Fire ants also will not live near Canadians. SO import some Canadians and your problem will be solved. Not the Nova Scotia kind either. They MUST be from the west of Niagara Falls or the magic will not work.

20 Nov 2012 02:07 PM
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destrip     

JackieRabbit: Fire ants aren't actually ants, but a kind of wingless wasp.


No.

While they do sting like wasps, they are members of the genus Solenopsis, which is most definitely an ant genus. 

You may be thinking about velvet ants, which are wingless wasps.

20 Nov 2012 03:07 PM
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FunkOut    [TotalFark]  
My parents have gotten bales with dead rodents, dead rattlesnakes, and even a whole dead chicken once.

The rattle bales were creepy, you'd hear that noise when you moved one.

20 Nov 2012 04:06 PM
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Bong Hits For Mohammed     
I recently opened a boxed pallett of tiles that were cut and packaged in Turkey. There was a wierd cocoon that was made out of leaves that was attached to the wood packaging. I was curious and opened it up to find the biggest brown pupa, about the size of the last joint of your thumb, wiggling and alive.
I personally escourted it to the chicken coop and fed it to my greedy vultures!

20 Nov 2012 09:51 PM
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