"Oh, you want to go to heaven? turn right." *drives onto railroad tracks*

"OK, I will write God a ticket then. But if He doesnt show up for court, we are putting you in jail. Still want to blame the copilot?"

God also told her to leave the scene of an injury accident? God sounds like more of a dick every day.

I do this in terms of a legitimate rape. God is my co-rapist it's his will.

Bath salts?

JohnAnnArbor: Bath salts?

Jesus Juice

American-style religion, explained in 30 seconds.

Me thinks a psych evaluation is in the offing.......

"And I was so pleased to receive this information that I ran 20 red lights in His honor..."

A biker once told me a story about how "Jesus grabbed his handle bars".

God may be her co-pilot, but Nyarlathotep is her bombardier.

I wonder what the weather was like, freezing rain maybe?.
She would not have cared anyway.

She has to go to court and swear on the Bible before giving testimony that God doesn't exist and wasn't helping her drive. Error, error, does not compute. Error.

People laugh, call her nuts. Then pray to God themselves.

Look either God is real and he was her co-pilot or God isn't real. She was able to drive 100 in a 30, which to me sounds really impressive. I don't think I could handle that without divine guidance. As an atheist, I feel I can be objective third party in this and say that indeed this is proof that God does exist.

(I know I'm all over the place here. Still angry about my dickhead boss, getting more drunk by the minute)

Is this like how Luke was able to lightsaber with the blast shield down?

Oh I believe there were spirits involved, probably at least 80 proof ones

Jesus,
When will people stop using religion as an excuse for their stupidity!?

(Obviously a rhetorical question. I don't speak with imaginary friends.)

"Our lady of blessed acceleration, please do not fail us now."

2 Replies: Jesus,
When will people stop using religion as an excuse for their stupidity!?

(Obviously a rhetorical question. I don't speak with imaginary friends.)

Um, you do realize you're asking questions on Fark, right?

I'd this one of those "Let Jesus Take the Wheel" whackjobs?

Godspeed, Melissa!

Woman traveling 100mph in a 30mph zone..... ...."I was letting the Lord's spiritS guide me"

Rum ?
Vodka ?
Brandy ?

quatchi: "And I was so pleased to receive this information that I ran 20 red lights in His honor..."

She does have far away eyes...

"fark off, Jesus"

"You drive like my dad. Put the hammer down, you pussy."

capt.hollister: Woman traveling 100mph in a 30mph zone..... ...."I was letting the Lord's spiritS guide me"

Rum ?
Vodka ?
Brandy ?

Boone's Farm

my dog is my copilot

"I was letting the Lord's Charles Darwin's spirit guide me."


Fixed.

I was drivin' home early Sunday morning
Through Bakersfield,
Listening to gospel music on the coloured radio station,
And the preacher said: "You know you always have the lord by your side"
And I was so pleased to be informed of this
That I ran twenty red lights in his honour,
Thank you Jesus, thank you lord

G.I.R.B.: capt.hollister: Woman traveling 100mph in a 30mph zone..... ...."I was letting the Lord's spiritS guide me"

Rum ?
Vodka ?
Brandy ?

Boone's Farm

MD2020.

no reference to cannonball yet?

If I were her I'd be mighty angry at God for making that goddamn fugly.

So a UK paper - I don't understand that part all all, WTF does the UK care? - reports on a weird traffic situation that happens to occur in Florida.

Subby tags it as Florida and for reasons unknown, it goes green. Subby is an idiot. The mods that went along with this are also idiots. This is *not* a Florida thing. It could have happened anywhere.

This is no surprise to me. Back when I had an old VW Bug and had to go to the junk yard for parts it was amazing how many totaled cars there were with those little fish icons on them and Jesus is my copilot stickers.

It appears as if she has a cynical view of the US Constitution's First Amendment. This is the greatest and also First Amendment. She has insulted me on constitutional grounds.

BronyMedic: G.I.R.B.: capt.hollister: Woman traveling 100mph in a 30mph zone..... ...."I was letting the Lord's spiritS guide me"

Rum ?
Vodka ?
Brandy ?

Boone's Farm

MD2020.

Thunderbird

dofus: So a UK paper - I don't understand that part all all, WTF does the UK care? - reports on a weird traffic situation that happens to occur in Florida.

Subby tags it as Florida and for reasons unknown, it goes green. Subby is an idiot. The mods that went along with this are also idiots. This is *not* a Florida thing. It could have happened anywhere.

You sound like you live in Florida.

Jesus built hot rods

G.I.R.B.: BronyMedic: G.I.R.B.: capt.hollister: Woman traveling 100mph in a 30mph zone..... ...."I was letting the Lord's spiritS guide me"

Rum ?
Vodka ?
Brandy ?

Boone's Farm

MD2020.

Black Tower.

Thunderbird

G.I.R.B.: BronyMedic: G.I.R.B.: capt.hollister: Woman traveling 100mph in a 30mph zone..... ...."I was letting the Lord's spiritS guide me"

Rum ?
Vodka ?
Brandy ?

Boone's Farm

MD2020.

Thunderbird

WHATS THE WORD, BROTHER?

How come nobody ever talks about having the Lord's spirit guide them into a soup kitchen? Why is it always dangerous, self-serving situations with this spirit guy? God sounds like a major dick.

Marcus Aurelius: "Our lady of blessed acceleration, please do not fail us now."
[2.bp.blogspot.com image 850x459]

You know I never noticed this before but shouldnt they have a little less gas in the tank than it being over 3/4ths full and just having driven 106 miles after filling up? Well, I guess theres that and the fact that they left in the evening and takes them until the sun comes up to drive that far...

G.I.R.B.: BronyMedic: G.I.R.B.: capt.hollister: Woman traveling 100mph in a 30mph zone..... ...."I was letting the Lord's spiritS guide me"

Rum ?
Vodka ?
Brandy ?

Boone's Farm

MD2020.

Thunderbird

CRAP.....


BLACK TOWER

UGH :)

preview happens to be your friend ES, why not use it next time?

dofus: This is *not* a Florida thing. It could have happened anywhere.

FTFA: Officers in Fort Pierce, Florida, were alerted to Miller when they saw her silver Toyota driving at speed along US 1 while its horn was sounding.

GentlemanJ: God may be her co-pilot, but Nyarlathotep is her bombardier.

Shouldn't that be Allah?

The My Little Pony Killer: God sounds like a major dick.

It's just Old Testament God. He got better in the New Testament when his Psychiatrist put him on meds.

GranoblasticMan: dofus: This is *not* a Florida thing. It could have happened anywhere.

FTFA: Officers in Fort Pierce, Florida, were alerted to Miller when they saw her silver Toyota driving at speed along US 1 while its horn was sounding.

And shiat, just for completeness...

FTFA: Miller, of Port St. Lucie, was arrested on charges of reckless driving and speeding.

She was taken to the St. Lucie County Jail and placed under a $375 bail.

GranoblasticMan: GranoblasticMan: dofus: This is *not* a Florida thing. It could have happened anywhere.

FTFA: Officers in Fort Pierce, Florida, were alerted to Miller when they saw her silver Toyota driving at speed along US 1 while its horn was sounding.

And shiat, just for completeness...

FTFA: Miller, of Port St. Lucie, was arrested on charges of reckless driving and speeding.

She was taken to the St. Lucie County Jail and placed under a $375 bail.

But besides ALL OF THAT, it could have happened anywhere.... Especially Florida. 8)

 

Also,

God was my copilot. But then we crashed in the mountains and I had to eat him.

/it is a shirt that I have