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   Thief makes off with 18 tons of chocolate in Austria. Suspect is said to be suffering from PMS

23 Nov 2012 10:31 PM   |   1664 clicks   |   Fox News
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shanrick    [TotalFark]  
Crikey!

23 Nov 2012 08:00 PM
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JFarker131     
Finders keepers, biatches.

23 Nov 2012 09:07 PM
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jimmyego    [TotalFark]  
I like how right at the bottom, in its own paragraph is "Police are investigating." Thank goodness that wraps up that lingering question.

23 Nov 2012 09:34 PM
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Amos Quito     
markfadden.files.wordpress.com

He vowed to rebuild!

23 Nov 2012 09:35 PM
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MaudlinMutantMollusk    [TotalFark]  
Police now staking out large shipments of Clearasil

23 Nov 2012 10:32 PM
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Indubitably     
To lift

23 Nov 2012 10:34 PM
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Badgers     
cdn.idontlikeyouinthatway.com

/Wanted for questioning.

23 Nov 2012 10:35 PM
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MBooda     
Messrs. Slugworth, Fickelgruber and Prodnose unavailable for comment.

/obscure?

23 Nov 2012 10:41 PM
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clipperbox     
somehow relevant

epicdemotivational.com

23 Nov 2012 10:42 PM
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oukewldave     

Badgers: [cdn.idontlikeyouinthatway.com image 800x1206]

/Wanted for questioning.


What is Christina Aguilera's fat, ugly sister's name?

23 Nov 2012 10:45 PM
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PhiloeBedoe     
i1079.photobucket.com

23 Nov 2012 11:01 PM
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Im_Gumby     
That's a shiatload of dessert for a couple shrimps on the barbie

23 Nov 2012 11:16 PM
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HoratioGates     
I find that headline to be sexually offensive. Just because I'm a man and I can't have PMS doesn't mean I shouldn't be on the suspect list. (Well, at least if I was on that side of the Atlantic at the time. If a bunch of chocolate goes missing from Hershey's, or even Ghirardelli I could very well be the culprit.

Signed,
Dieting Fat Man

23 Nov 2012 11:19 PM
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BitwiseShift     
What an Australian train taking chocolate to neighboring Switzerland (they'll never look there) might look like.   
www.hobbiesplus.com.au

23 Nov 2012 11:19 PM
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Fark Rye For Many Whores     
Thief makes off with 18 tons of chocolate in Austria.

I don't know what an Austrian "ton" is, what's that in basements/square fortnight?

23 Nov 2012 11:21 PM
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phrawgh     
www.thepunch.com.au

23 Nov 2012 11:24 PM
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uncleacid     
A little dessert with your bloomin onion.

23 Nov 2012 11:25 PM
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Don't Troll Me Bro!     

clipperbox: somehow relevant

[epicdemotivational.com image 720x588]


WTF is that? Serious Question.

23 Nov 2012 11:28 PM
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Mega Steve     
cache.gawkerassets.com
Inconsolable

/WTF is wrong with me???

23 Nov 2012 11:39 PM
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Deep Contact     
Love Australian chocolate.

23 Nov 2012 11:44 PM
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ciberido    [TotalFark]  
Were stainless steal bolts or real unboned dead frogs involved in any way?

23 Nov 2012 11:50 PM
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WhippingBoy     

Mega Steve: [cache.gawkerassets.com image 340x259]
Inconsolable

/WTF is wrong with me???


Why did you have that???

WTF is wrong with you???

23 Nov 2012 11:52 PM
Reply
fusillade762    [TotalFark]  

Mega Steve: [cache.gawkerassets.com image 340x259]
Inconsolable

/WTF is wrong with me???


If you're a fan of "Cathy" I really don't know where to start...

24 Nov 2012 12:08 AM
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ktybear     

Deep Contact: Love Australian chocolate.


What Austrian chocolate might look like

resources0.news.com.au

24 Nov 2012 12:19 AM
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Piestar     

MBooda: Slugworth, Fickelgruber and Prodnose


Came for something of this sort, left satisfied!!!

24 Nov 2012 12:19 AM
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Piestar     

BitwiseShift: What an Australian train taking chocolate to neighboring Switzerland (they'll never look there) might look like.   
[www.hobbiesplus.com.au image 425x320]


You left out the mighty, mighty, mighty long bridge.

24 Nov 2012 12:21 AM
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Piestar     
The trip should have taken less than a day, but as of Friday - four days after the truck was loaded - the delivery was still outstanding.

Of course it was, it was Austrian damn Farking chocolate, it's outstanding by definition.

24 Nov 2012 12:23 AM
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gadian     
I bet they even use real chocolate making stuff in their chocolate. Not chocolate simulating syrup like some American companies.

24 Nov 2012 12:30 AM
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Seasons I'v Withered     

Badgers: [cdn.idontlikeyouinthatway.com image 800x1206]

/Wanted for questioning.

pictures
We can do wig pics now?
Nice detail!

24 Nov 2012 12:42 AM
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Hagenhatesyouall     

HoratioGates: I find that headline to be sexually offensive. Just because I'm a man and I can't have PMS doesn't mean I shouldn't be on the suspect list. (Well, at least if I was on that side of the Atlantic at the time. If a bunch of chocolate goes missing from Hershey's, or even Ghirardelli I could very well be the culprit.

Signed,
Dieting FatG Man


FTFY

24 Nov 2012 12:50 AM
Reply
Gyrfalcon     

jimmyego: I like how right at the bottom, in its own paragraph is "Police are investigating." Thank goodness that wraps up that lingering question.


They have to investigate every sample they find, to ensure if it's chocolate or not.

24 Nov 2012 01:14 AM
Reply
ciberido    [TotalFark]  

Fark Rye For Many Whores: Thief makes off with 18 tons of chocolate in Austria.

I don't know what an Austrian "ton" is, what's that in basements/square fortnight?


It's about 20 kangaroos.

24 Nov 2012 01:23 AM
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MattyBlast    [TotalFark]  

Badgers: /Wanted for questioning.


I would to have her shove her tongue down my esophogus.

24 Nov 2012 01:31 AM
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Rixel     
Massive theft of maple syrup...check
Massive theft of walnuts.........check
And now chocolate.
Is there new Bond villain that I am not aware of?

"He's insidious, Bond....first, he manages to cut off the world's banana supply by introducing a virus that is designed to eliminate all existing varieties...and now he plans to unleash a Sundae Avalanche down Everest! It would make Vesuvius laughable in comparison!"
"What's the name"
"Her name is Ivan Yuri Banana, and his right hand woman is "Strawberry Shortcake"

24 Nov 2012 02:16 AM
Reply
Rixel     
"Ummm...he also has a
Sexual Identity issue as well. But here's a gadget to shut you up."

24 Nov 2012 02:20 AM
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Gordon Bennett     

Deep Contact: Love Australian chocolate.


Oh yes.

static.austriangrocery.com

Bliss.

24 Nov 2012 03:08 AM
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rackrent    [TotalFark]  
Here's what really happened.

Vat of chocolate

24 Nov 2012 04:15 AM
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Day_Old_Dutchie     

24 Nov 2012 04:48 AM
Reply
dickfreckle     

fusillade762: Mega Steve: [cache.gawkerassets.com image 340x259]
Inconsolable

/WTF is wrong with me???

If you're a fan of "Cathy" I really don't know where to start...


That strip never made any sense to me (this was in the pre-broadband days when us over-30 folks still read the funnies after jerking it to the bra section of the Macy's circular).

Every strip is the same: Cathy starts out normally. Cathy builds rage over something utterly inconsequential. Cathy has an apoplectic fit with the same projectile sweat beads (or are those tears?) every time. Cathy says something in the final frame that's intended to be amusing, but never is.

Look, I know I'm a guy, but I've lived long-term with several women. Even they hated that strip. Why was it so successful? Can anyone explain this to me?

/serious question, because this has always baffled me

24 Nov 2012 07:06 AM
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legion_of_doo     
You know why men need a "den" or a "man cave" in the home?

To avoid your farking PMS, that's why.

24 Nov 2012 12:36 PM
Reply
almostsane     

HoratioGates: I find that headline to be sexually offensive. Just because I'm a man and I can't have PMS doesn't mean I shouldn't be on the suspect list. (Well, at least if I was on that side of the Atlantic at the time. If a bunch of chocolate goes missing from Hershey's, or even Ghirardelli I could very well be the culprit.

Signed,
Dieting Fat Man


You're now on my favorites list :-)

24 Nov 2012 02:22 PM
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