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   New study says that late term sex does not induce labor. Researchers conclude that the only sex that really induces labor is the sex that happened nine months earlier

26 Nov 2012 08:12 AM   |   2041 clicks   |   Today Online
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Show_The_O_Face     
Well don't tell my wife that now.

/38 weeks

26 Nov 2012 08:15 AM
King_Web     
Which makes a horny pregnant woman less awesome because...?

26 Nov 2012 08:15 AM
gilatrout     
I remember when my son was about a week late, being told to go get busy.

best use of our time ever.

26 Nov 2012 08:16 AM
Shadow Blasko     

King_Web: Which makes a horny pregnant woman less awesome because...?


Absolutely no reason.

/Keep calm and carry on good sir.

26 Nov 2012 08:17 AM
Public Savant     
Yeah, so stuff it bloated hippos - we don't wanna diddle you when junior is about to come out for air.

26 Nov 2012 08:17 AM
gilatrout     
When a pregnant woman wants pickle and ice cream, she's not asking you to go to the grocery store...

26 Nov 2012 08:18 AM
LovingTeacher     

Public Savant: Yeah, so stuff it bloated hippos - we don't wanna diddle you when junior is about to come out for air.


Speak for yourself, and I guess if your pregnant wife or girlfriend (if you're not forever alone) wants some send her my way.

26 Nov 2012 08:19 AM
sexorcisst     
How do asian gynecologists even examine all those vaginas with those pixels in front of it.

26 Nov 2012 08:19 AM
BronyMedic     
Just be careful when you stick it in. You don't want to inadvertantly give your baby a mushroom-shaped dent in his fontanels.

Boy, would that be embarassing.

26 Nov 2012 08:20 AM
Shadow Blasko     

BronyMedic: Just be careful when you stick it in. You don't want to inadvertantly give your baby a mushroom-shaped dent in his fontanels.

Boy, would that be embarassing.


If something like that happened to you as a kid... would you let it go to your head?

26 Nov 2012 08:23 AM
Mrs.Sharpier     

sexorcisst: How do asian gynecologists even examine all those vaginas with those pixels in front of it.


Haha....I mean, what are you talking about?

26 Nov 2012 08:24 AM
martid4    [TotalFark]  

sexorcisst: How do asian gynecologists even examine all those vaginas with those pixels in front of it.


www.troll.meView Full Size

26 Nov 2012 08:24 AM
Skarekrough     
I enjoy how the internet has managed to catalog every situation where I either didn't have sex when it was likely or how average and normal people are having way more sex than I am.

Kill me. Kill me now.

26 Nov 2012 08:30 AM
Solty Dog    [TotalFark]  
Unless I see it on Mythbusters, no amount of science can convince me one way or the nother.

26 Nov 2012 08:31 AM
maddermaxx     
How is this spiffy? How Subby? HOOOWWWW?

Show_The_O_Face: Well don't tell my wife that now.

/38 weeks


Nor mine! These reckless researches aren't helping anyone!

/24 weeks, but was looking forward to the last few weeks.
/That's it, I'm gonna join the Republicans, and just pretend this science doesn't exist.

26 Nov 2012 08:33 AM
spentmiles     
Ahhh, the week after the delivery is when the primo sex happens. With the cervix still dialated, you can breach the castle wall like a coked out Gary Busey playing Henry the Fifth for two nights at the Excalibur. It's like there's a little monkey up there squeezing and polishing the tip every time it juts into the uterus. You just have to be careful not to spurt that deep inside or you might force fertilize her entire egg store at once. If that happens, her pussy will split itself barfing tadpoles in about three months, leaving you to raise the kid on your own. Not what you are looking for, my man.

26 Nov 2012 08:35 AM
Shadow Blasko     

spentmiles: you can breach the castle wall like a coked out Gary Busey playing Henry the Fifth for two nights at the Excalibur.


Don't ever change.

26 Nov 2012 08:38 AM
BronyMedic     

Shadow Blasko: BronyMedic: Just be careful when you stick it in. You don't want to inadvertantly give your baby a mushroom-shaped dent in his fontanels.

Boy, would that be embarassing.

If something like that happened to you as a kid... would you let it go to your head?


Well, do you ever wonder how babies get hydrocephaly? Or come out with scalp bruises.

Dad thrust too hard. QED. :)

26 Nov 2012 08:39 AM
No Time To Explain     
This needed a study because?

/anyone who watches preg porn knows this already
//not that I regularly watch it
///not my cup of tea that is
////don't judge me bro

26 Nov 2012 08:40 AM
King_Web     
spentmiles

Damn you, sir, you made me spit out my drink.

26 Nov 2012 08:41 AM
croesius     
Oh lord, I'm gonna be a goner by the time this is all through. 15 weeks in and the dial is swiftly approaching 11. She's a damn fiend.

/lovin' it while I can, when the twins arrive I'll have my hands full.

26 Nov 2012 08:42 AM
Shadow Blasko     

croesius: Oh lord, I'm gonna be a goner by the time this is all through. 15 weeks in and the dial is swiftly approaching 11. She's a damn fiend.

/lovin' it while I can, when the twins arrive I'll have my hands full.


Enjoy those handfulls while they are perky...

Oh wait.. you .. Oh!

26 Nov 2012 08:43 AM
funzyr     
What difference is it to Subby what my wife gives me for Christmas?

26 Nov 2012 08:44 AM
Towermonkey     
Agreed, pregnant sex = awesome. Possibly better than the beginning-of-relationship sex.

Now that the old lady has had a hysterectomy, and they haven't got her hormones right yet, we go from awesome monkey sex twice a day to month-long dry spells.

Bollocks.

26 Nov 2012 08:47 AM
croesius     

Shadow Blasko: croesius: Oh lord, I'm gonna be a goner by the time this is all through. 15 weeks in and the dial is swiftly approaching 11. She's a damn fiend.

/lovin' it while I can, when the twins arrive I'll have my hands full.

Enjoy those handfulls while they are perky...

Oh wait.. you .. Oh!


Haaaaa, well played sir. Well played.

Best thing about "the book": their advice to go nuts and try all kinda positioning.

26 Nov 2012 09:01 AM
Akambe     
I and my wife and our last child would beg to differ with the findings. Baby was late, we got bizay, and BOOM comes the baby. The effect was pretty much immediate--within the hour, contractions began and didn't let up. Yes, it's anecdotal, but I'm still convinced it worked.

26 Nov 2012 09:03 AM
meanmutton     

maddermaxx: How is this spiffy? How Subby? HOOOWWWW?

Show_The_O_Face: Well don't tell my wife that now.

/38 weeks

Nor mine! These reckless researches aren't helping anyone!

/24 weeks, but was looking forward to the last few weeks.
/That's it, I'm gonna join the Republicans, and just pretend this science doesn't exist.


Good news for you, then. I'll happily take care of your wife while you're off reading about homeopathy, energy healing, herbal remedies, the evils of nuclear power and genetically modified food, and all the rest of that super-sciencey stuff so popular on the Left.

26 Nov 2012 09:04 AM
Scorpio Rex     

Towermonkey: Now that the old lady has had a hysterectomy, and they haven't got her hormones right yet, we go from awesome monkey sex twice a day to month-long dry spells.


I hope you guys figure out the correct cocktail soon, brother. My friend's wife had the hysto and she went nuts. Very ugly end to that marriage. Now she parties like a twenty year old (she's in her late 50s) and he is happily remarried so it worked out for both of them, eventually.

26 Nov 2012 09:07 AM
TNel     
So subby doesn't understand that labor != conception? And I'm with the group of guys that says if you don't want to mess around with your pregnant girl you can send them my way. Won't do any harm she's already pregnant.

26 Nov 2012 09:09 AM
BronyMedic     

meanmutton: Good news for you, then. I'll happily take care of your wife while you're off reading about homeopathy, energy healing, herbal remedies, the evils of nuclear power and genetically modified food, and all the rest of that super-sciencey stuff so popular on the Left.Far left and far right.


Dude, I hate to break this to you, but anti-science crap like that knows no political boudaries. On the left, it tends to be based on spirtial belief and a distrust of Government regulation and safety. On the right it tends to be based on Fundamentalist Christian Belief, and the idea that Government should not regulate alternative medicine companies. Mike Adams, for example, the proprietor of NaturalNews.com would be described as far left. Barbera Fischer, the creator of the anti-vaccination NVIC group, could be described as Far Right.

26 Nov 2012 09:16 AM
ace in your face     

BronyMedic: meanmutton: Good news for you, then. I'll happily take care of your wife while you're off reading about homeopathy, energy healing, herbal remedies, the evils of nuclear power and genetically modified food, and all the rest of that super-sciencey stuff so popular on the Left.Far left and far right.

Dude, I hate to break this to you, but anti-science crap like that knows no political boudaries. On the left, it tends to be based on spirtial belief and a distrust of Government regulation and safety. On the right it tends to be based on Fundamentalist Christian Belief, and the idea that Government should not regulate alternative medicine companies. Mike Adams, for example, the proprietor of NaturalNews.com would be described as far left. Barbera Fischer, the creator of the anti-vaccination NVIC group, could be described as Far Right.


Funny cause I know way more lefty anti vaxers.

/not an anti vaxer
//Sex didnt work when I was a week late so I went on to have a four day long induction. fml.

26 Nov 2012 09:26 AM
Foundling     
"New study says that late term sex does not induce labor"

Somebody tell these researchers to mind their own damn business!

26 Nov 2012 09:28 AM
Cythraul     
Is it sexual abuse if you poke the baby on the way out?

26 Nov 2012 09:31 AM
Abe Vigoda's Ghost     
It's the closest most farkers will ever come to having a threesome.

26 Nov 2012 09:49 AM
Valiente     

spentmiles: Ahhh, the week after the delivery is when the primo sex happens. With the cervix still dialated, you can breach the castle wall like a coked out Gary Busey playing Henry the Fifth for two nights at the Excalibur. It's like there's a little monkey up there squeezing and polishing the tip every time it juts into the uterus. You just have to be careful not to spurt that deep inside or you might force fertilize her entire egg store at once. If that happens, her pussy will split itself barfing tadpoles in about three months, leaving you to raise the kid on your own. Not what you are looking for, my man.


It's like Hunter S. Thompson never entered low Earth orbit.

26 Nov 2012 09:56 AM
Valiente     

Cythraul: Is it sexual abuse if you poke the baby on the way out?


Only when it's a breech birth.

/yeah,. I went there...conceptually...so to speak...

26 Nov 2012 09:58 AM
uttertosh     
New study says that late term sex does not induce labor

Like foreskin doesn't cause aids, it doesn't!!

Quite how American medicine manages to think of itself so highly, I'll never know. The rest of the world simply knows that sex during pregnancy is healthy for all parties involved, and I'd never heard of late-term sex-inducing labour until this article presented this old-wives tale as accepted medical practice.

26 Nov 2012 10:06 AM
BronyMedic     

ace in your face: Funny cause I know way more lefty anti vaxers.


The ones on the left are your "Anti-Science" Anti-vaxxers. They're the ones that think Ethyl Mercury Preservatives cause Autism, or laud the "toxins" that make up a vaccine while being completely ignorant about the basic principle "Dose makes a poison".

The ones on the right tend to be the "Religious" Anti-vaxxers. Up until the 1970s, these were the most common in the United States. The Religious ones either claim that it's against God's will to vaccinate, or that the Government has no right to force vaccinations in the interest of public health. But they're also guilty of a fair amount of Anti-Science and toxin gambit themselves.

Valiente: Only when it's a breech birth.


Better than an umbilical prolapse, or canal entrapment. Then you get to teach mom what the meaning of "Fisting" is until you get into the OB Suite.

26 Nov 2012 10:10 AM
Valiente     
Talk about a letdown.

26 Nov 2012 10:16 AM
factoryconnection    [TotalFark]  

No Time To Explain: This needed a study because?


Because most doctors would like their medical advice to come with some scientific backing more thorough than "I've always heard..."

croesius: Oh lord, I'm gonna be a goner by the time this is all through. 15 weeks in and the dial is swiftly approaching 11. She's a damn fiend.


The second trimester isn't to be confused with a sign of things to come. It is a unique and wonderful time.

uttertosh: Quite how American medicine manages to think of itself so highly, I'll never know. The rest of the world simply knows that sex during pregnancy is healthy for all parties involved, and I'd never heard of late-term sex-inducing labour until this article presented this old-wives tale as accepted medical practice.


Incredible, then that this article is based on a study originated and performed in... wait for it... Malaysia. Mind your step coming down from your pedestal, genius.

My wife is a natural childbirth instructor and has heard the wives' tale described in TFA but has seen only evidence of sex ripening the cervix, in which cervix softens and becomes more distensible, a process required for cervical dilation, labor and delivery of a fetus. She has never found any evidence to support the induction claim, which puts it in the same category of walking up stairs, eating spicy foods, you name it.

I have to wonder if there's any truth to the thunderstorm correlation. All of our children were born on days with incoming thunderstorms, during which the L&D suites of the respective hospitals were flooded with patients. Who knows? Not exactly something you can plan.

26 Nov 2012 10:44 AM
Linoleum_Blownapart     

Shadow Blasko: spentmiles: you can breach the castle wall like a coked out Gary Busey playing Henry the Fifth for two nights at the Excalibur.

Don't ever change.


Yet another line that becomes his Farky tag. I might just save myself the time and mark him 'Most Frequently Changed Tag'.

26 Nov 2012 11:00 AM
KatjaMouse     
I had a Sexuality professor tell us that sex does nothing to induce labor. It's all about the female orgasm because it causes contractions of the uterus when done right.

26 Nov 2012 11:04 AM
Nightsweat     
Sex doesn't help induce labor - orgasm helps induce labor. The uterine contractions help get the party started.

26 Nov 2012 11:05 AM
Kali-Ma     
There are women who still want to have sex at that point? Somewhere in the middle of my 5th month it just became entirely too uncomfortable. Then again, I hated being pregnant start to finish. Maybe it's the "oh, pregnancy just makes me glow" women.

26 Nov 2012 11:22 AM
Cythraul     

Kali-Ma: There are women who still want to have sex at that point? Somewhere in the middle of my 5th month it just became entirely too uncomfortable. Then again, I hated being pregnant start to finish. Maybe it's the "oh, pregnancy just makes me glow" women.


Bioluminescent baby?

26 Nov 2012 11:37 AM
demaL-demaL-yeH    [TotalFark]  

Shadow Blasko: spentmiles: you can breach the castle wall like a coked out Gary Busey playing Henry the Fifth for two nights at the Excalibur.

Don't ever change.

post. FTFE

26 Nov 2012 11:59 AM
Johnsnownw     

factoryconnection: No Time To Explain: This needed a study because?

Because most doctors would like their medical advice to come with some scientific backing more thorough than "I've always heard..."

croesius: Oh lord, I'm gonna be a goner by the time this is all through. 15 weeks in and the dial is swiftly approaching 11. She's a damn fiend.

The second trimester isn't to be confused with a sign of things to come. It is a unique and wonderful time.

uttertosh: Quite how American medicine manages to think of itself so highly, I'll never know. The rest of the world simply knows that sex during pregnancy is healthy for all parties involved, and I'd never heard of late-term sex-inducing labour until this article presented this old-wives tale as accepted medical practice.

Incredible, then that this article is based on a study originated and performed in... wait for it... Malaysia. Mind your step coming down from your pedestal, genius.

My wife is a natural childbirth instructor and has heard the wives' tale described in TFA but has seen only evidence of sex ripening the cervix, in which cervix softens and becomes more distensible, a process required for cervical dilation, labor and delivery of a fetus. She has never found any evidence to support the induction claim, which puts it in the same category of walking up stairs, eating spicy foods, you name it.

I have to wonder if there's any truth to the thunderstorm correlation. All of our children were born on days with incoming thunderstorms, during which the L&D suites of the respective hospitals were flooded with patients. Who knows? Not exactly something you can plan.


I was with you until the thunderstorms comment. Now I just don't know what to think, it kind of invalidates everything else you said.

/Seriously through me.

26 Nov 2012 12:11 PM
Johnsnownw     
*threw

/dammit

26 Nov 2012 12:12 PM
Don Piano     

gilatrout: When a pregnant woman wants pickle and ice cream, she's not asking you to go to the grocery store...


I can't believe I got as far in life as I have without getting that joke.

26 Nov 2012 12:18 PM
Lunaville     

factoryconnection: I have to wonder if there's any truth to the thunderstorm correlation. All of our children were born on days with incoming thunderstorms


I've met medical personnel that are absolutely convinced that sudden changes in barometric pressure send women into labor. There had been a sudden drop in barometric pressure when I went into labor. The hospital was so packed with women giving birth I had to pace the waiting room for families for over an hour because there were no birth suites available. Once I'd given birth, there was a frantic rush to clean the room so someone else could come in.

26 Nov 2012 12:19 PM
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