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   This is what happens when Britons put down the curry and eat their own country's food for a change

27 Nov 2012 08:07 AM   |   14312 clicks   |   Daily Mail
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markfara     
Cue the squirty-poop jokes. . . .

27 Nov 2012 08:08 AM
Teknowaffle    [TotalFark]  
My wife and I just got this last night. I have been able to hold in, but not my poor wife.

27 Nov 2012 08:09 AM
macadamnut     
i.dailymail.co.ukView Full Size


I'd vomit all over her.

27 Nov 2012 08:10 AM
Mad Scientist     
Who are the Britons?

27 Nov 2012 08:12 AM
SockMonkeyHolocaust     
I always follow the Two Fat Ladies' advice on food prep: wrap it in a fat net.

27 Nov 2012 08:13 AM
skinink     
www.lolwithme.orgView Full Size

27 Nov 2012 08:16 AM
special20    [TotalFark]  
Poor lil English feller...
i.imgur.comView Full Size

27 Nov 2012 08:23 AM
The Slush     

Mad Scientist: Who are the Britons?


i.imgur.comView Full Size

27 Nov 2012 08:24 AM
j0e_average     
People of Britain, you need to eat more vegetables. Peas alone are not sufficient.

27 Nov 2012 08:33 AM
Slaxl     

j0e_average: People of Britain, you need to eat more vegetables. Peas alone are not sufficient.


Never!

27 Nov 2012 08:34 AM
gmoney101     

Mad Scientist: Who are the Britons?


The Slush: Mad Scientist: Who are the Britons?

[i.imgur.com image 302x227]


i.chzbgr.comView Full Size

27 Nov 2012 08:34 AM
fourskys     

The Slush: Mad Scientist: Who are the Britons?


Welcome to Fark, where the obscure is obvious, and the obvious, obscure.

/there's some lovely filth over here, Dennis!

27 Nov 2012 08:35 AM
gmoney101     

j0e_average: People of Britain, you need to eat more vegetables. Peas alone are not sufficient.


Where did this come from?

27 Nov 2012 08:35 AM
oldfarthenry    [TotalFark]  
Having been raised on British food I concur with the headline.
i1151.photobucket.comView Full Size

27 Nov 2012 08:37 AM
Spanky McStupid     
I'm sure it's simply a normal reaction to British cuisine.
- dmeyer40 , tampa, United States, 27/11/2012 12:43
Click to rate Rating 23


Subby?

27 Nov 2012 08:44 AM
Sybarite    [TotalFark]  

macadamnut: [i.dailymail.co.uk image 634x556]

I'd vomit all over her.



What kind of person prepares to vomit with the seat down?

27 Nov 2012 09:01 AM
j0e_average     

gmoney101: j0e_average: People of Britain, you need to eat more vegetables. Peas alone are not sufficient.

Where did this come from?


Good sensimilla.

27 Nov 2012 09:04 AM
Englebert Slaptyback     

Sybarite


What kind of person prepares to vomit with the seat down?


One who is posing for a photo and is not actually about to vomit.

Or one who doesn't want to lean on the cold porcelain.

27 Nov 2012 09:05 AM
Toddicusrex     
Ironic that the first hottie I've seen in a Daily Mail article isn't labeled as a hottie..

27 Nov 2012 09:13 AM
Indypendy     
On the plus side, its a great way to avoid gaining all those extra holiday pounds.

/ain't no diet like a vomit virus

27 Nov 2012 09:13 AM
ChaoticLimbs     
A primer on English cooking:

1. Cooking is the process for driving flavor and green color from vegetables, moisture from meat, and exists purely to merge your foods together into a greyish brown mass.

2. Carrots are the primary ingredient.

3. Meat should be used, but should be boiled, then braised, then slow-cooked until it is brown on the outside and a deep rich grey color on the inside.

4. Wherever possible, try to put offal into your dish.

5. If meat is of low quality or you aren't sure what kind of animal it might be from, grind it, add some fennel, and make sausages.

27 Nov 2012 09:21 AM
DarkVader    [TotalFark]  

Toddicusrex: Ironic that the first hottie I've seen in a Daily Mail article isn't labeled as a hottie..


"Hottie" in a headline is a warning. You should always expect that if you see it, you may get something vomit-inducing.

27 Nov 2012 09:21 AM
Amishrabbit     
England, please wash your goddamned hands.

27 Nov 2012 09:43 AM
fo_sho!     

ChaoticLimbs: A primer on English cooking:

1. Cooking is the process for driving flavor and green color from vegetables, moisture from meat, and exists purely to merge your foods together into a greyish brown mass.

2. Carrots are the primary ingredient.

3. Meat should be used, but should be boiled, then braised, then slow-cooked until it is brown on the outside and a deep rich grey color on the inside.

4. Wherever possible, try to put offal into your dish.

5. If meat is of low quality or you aren't sure what kind of animal it might be from, grind it, add some fennel, and make sausages.


You've never actually been there, have you?

27 Nov 2012 09:46 AM
sedric     

Mad Scientist: Who are the Britons?


We all are, and I am your king!

27 Nov 2012 09:53 AM
maidtina     
FYI most curries were invented in the UK by Asian immigrants, much like hamburgers were invented in America by German immigrants. Americans generally do not consider hamburgers a foreign delicacy...

27 Nov 2012 10:13 AM
King Keepo     
This is what happens when Britons put down the curry and eat their own country's food for a change

This is what happens when the British eat a curry one level above the one they are used to.

27 Nov 2012 10:46 AM
Gordon Bennett     
Ugh. I'm off to Madagascar while the ports are still open.

27 Nov 2012 11:19 AM
The One True TheDavid     

Sybarite:

What kind of person prepares to vomit with the seat down?


The kind of person who needs to lean on his forearms. More surface area and it's usually cleaner if you're a normal half-domesticated guy.

27 Nov 2012 11:30 AM
Jaxotea     
pubsngrub.comView Full Size


swaninnfarnborough.co.ukView Full Size


static.guim.co.ukView Full Size


Above : Average Gastro Pub Fare

Below Where I had my Birthday meal....

www.thepapermills.co.ukView Full Size


www.thepapermills.co.ukView Full Size


www.thepapermills.co.ukView Full Size


But yes of course you are right, British Food is all appalling, badly cooked and a health risk, how on earth are we still alive.....

/and I have all my own teeth.....
// and I hate tea.....
/// and don't live in a Castle
//// Obviously not a good Brit..... Opps

27 Nov 2012 11:44 AM
macadamnut     

Englebert Slaptyback: Sybarite

What kind of person prepares to vomit with the seat down?


One who is posing for a photo and is not actually about to vomit.


So she's a vomit model?

27 Nov 2012 11:52 AM
Phins     
Cue the people who got this virus even though they got a flu shot and will cite this in the future as a reason not to get a flu shot.

27 Nov 2012 12:36 PM
Balchinian     

Sybarite: macadamnut: [i.dailymail.co.uk image 634x556]

I'd vomit all over her.


What kind of person prepares to vomit with the seat down?


One who lives in a house with a male. The seat is always cleaner than the bowl rim. Always.

27 Nov 2012 12:40 PM
macadamnut     

Jaxotea:
But yes of course you are right, British Food is all appalling, badly cooked and a health risk, how on earth are we still alive.....

/and I have all my own teeth.....
// and I hate tea.....
/// and don't live in a Castle
//// Obviously not a good Brit..... Opps



You really had me going there, too.

27 Nov 2012 12:45 PM
Slaxl     

Jaxotea: [pubsngrub.com image 384x273]

[swaninnfarnborough.co.uk image 247x172]

[static.guim.co.uk image 220x132]

Above : Average Gastro Pub Fare

Below Where I had my Birthday meal....

[www.thepapermills.co.uk image 800x300]

[www.thepapermills.co.uk image 800x300]

[www.thepapermills.co.uk image 200x250]

But yes of course you are right, British Food is all appalling, badly cooked and a health risk, how on earth are we still alive.....

/and I have all my own teeth.....
// and I hate tea.....
/// and don't live in a Castle
//// Obviously not a good Brit..... Opps


Oi! What are you doing? You know the rules, when we go on Fark, it's an American website so we have to put on our fake joke bad teeth tooth, speak wivout pronouncin leh-ahs, mention sweepin' chimneys and hows ya father. Our food is boiled to no flavour, and we LOVE TEA, I can't stress that last one enough.

27 Nov 2012 01:04 PM
phartman     

fo_sho!: ChaoticLimbs: A primer on English cooking:

1. Cooking is the process for driving flavor and green color from vegetables, moisture from meat, and exists purely to merge your foods together into a greyish brown mass.

2. Carrots are the primary ingredient.

3. Meat should be used, but should be boiled, then braised, then slow-cooked until it is brown on the outside and a deep rich grey color on the inside.

4. Wherever possible, try to put offal into your dish.

5. If meat is of low quality or you aren't sure what kind of animal it might be from, grind it, add some fennel, and make sausages.

You've never actually been there, have you?


Yes. And he was being benevolent. The food is even worse than portrayed.

27 Nov 2012 02:21 PM
Jaxotea     

Slaxl: Jaxotea: [pubsngrub.com image 384x273]

[swaninnfarnborough.co.uk image 247x172]

[static.guim.co.uk image 220x132]

Above : Average Gastro Pub Fare

Below Where I had my Birthday meal....

[www.thepapermills.co.uk image 800x300]

[www.thepapermills.co.uk image 800x300]

[www.thepapermills.co.uk image 200x250]

But yes of course you are right, British Food is all appalling, badly cooked and a health risk, how on earth are we still alive.....

/and I have all my own teeth.....
// and I hate tea.....
/// and don't live in a Castle
//// Obviously not a good Brit..... Opps

Oi! What are you doing? You know the rules, when we go on Fark, it's an American website so we have to put on our fake joke bad teeth tooth, speak wivout pronouncin leh-ahs, mention sweepin' chimneys and hows ya father. Our food is boiled to no flavour, and we LOVE TEA, I can't stress that last one enough.


Terribly sorry old chap, don't know what in the blazes came over me.
Time for some tea and crumpets I think.
Tally ho!

/am I doing it right?

27 Nov 2012 02:54 PM
mungo     
My entire family got it.

The two eldest kids woke up to discover they had redecorated their bedroom; my wife and inevitably got exposed to the bug when stripping them down, showering them, stripping beds etc. Our toddler got it two days later.

Having been softened up by 4 days without sleep, my wife finally succumbed and spend a further night up, this time with her own head down the loo.

I thought I'd dodged the bullet, but no, two days after that it was my turn. I vomited so hard I blew blood vessels in my eyes, and you could have run my shiat clean through a sieve.

One week later I'm still not 100% as my digestion recovers.

It's one bastard of a virus and anyone with kids does not stand a chance............

27 Nov 2012 03:50 PM
superdude72     
Curry is their own people's food. It was invented by British people in India.

27 Nov 2012 04:43 PM
ol' gormsby     

mungo:

One week later I'm still not 100% as my digestion recovers.


Perhaps you'd benefit from a faecal transplant?

27 Nov 2012 06:32 PM
prjindigo     
nice tits on the hoe, that's not an english toilet

/seen english toilets
//they're cleaner than your mom

27 Nov 2012 06:37 PM
Balchinian     

prjindigo: ...that's not an english toilet...


By gawd, you are right! I hadn't even noticed that. I suppose the first clue should have been that the woman is far too attractive to be British. *ducks, runs*

27 Nov 2012 07:53 PM
captjc     
i940.photobucket.comView Full Size

28 Nov 2012 01:03 AM
if_i_really_have_to     
Ugh, norovirus. We get big outbreaks of this in NZ too. Nasty.

However, in the end it's just a fancy name for gastroenteritis AKA "stomach flu" or "vomiting bug". Norovirus sounds scarier, though.

/It usually kicks off when sewage comes into contact with food
//Just think about that
///Be careful about what raw seafood you eat

28 Nov 2012 01:57 AM
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