| Cossacks are back, and they want to be Russia's Texas Rangers. "We're like Chuck Norris" |
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| FirstNationalBastard Whiny Pussies that are easily defeated by skinny Asian guys? |
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| Lumpmoose The Kremlin is seeking to use the once-feared paramilitary squads in its new drive to promote conservative values and appeal to nationalists. ... The conservative Cossacks have increased their political activity in response to an impromptu protest that feminist punk rockers Pussy Riot staged in Moscow's main cathedral in February. Groups of Cossacks recently barred visitors from entering a Moscow art exhibition that daubed Pussy Riot's trademark balaclavas over Orthodox Christian icons, and they led a successful campaign to cancel a staging of Vladimir Nabokov's racy novel "Lolita" in St. Petersburg. More like Chuck Norris than they realize. |
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| Pants full of macaroni!!
They think Obama's second term is going to bring 1000 years of darkness too? |
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| Sock Ruh Tease
They should be upgraded into Gunships. |
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| FirstNationalBastard They've been irrelevant for 30 years or so and people think they're dead? |
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Englebert Slaptyback
![]() pic is warm |
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skullkrusher
![]() might wanna rethink your plan, Russia. This guy isn't very intimidating |
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| DoomPaul
FTA: All-Russia Cossack Host directly subordinate to Putin is scheduled to be launched by the end of the year. Nice. |
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| DoomPaul
I messed that up: "A 400,000-strong All-Russia Cossack Host directly subordinate to Putin is scheduled to be launched by the end of the year. |
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Plant Rights Activist
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| CygnusDarius
skullkrusher: [graphics8.nytimes.com image 190x229] might wanna rethink your plan, Russia. This guy isn't very intimidating That's what they want you to think. /I would've loved learning that during highschool |
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| mootmah You can't trust a Cossack |
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| angry_scientist
GodenEye tried it in 1995 already. Sean Bean died a terrible death, as usual. You really want to try this route again, Russia? |
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| russlar
There are no men like Chuck Norris, just Chuck Norris. |
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| Myria Russian Cossacks? ![]() |
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| angry_scientist
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TV's Vinnie
![]() Dat sounds like a great idea, doesn't it Dommy? Oh yeh Kubla! Dat would be freekin' epic! |
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| skullkrusher
CygnusDarius: skullkrusher: [graphics8.nytimes.com image 190x229] might wanna rethink your plan, Russia. This guy isn't very intimidating That's what they want you to think. /I would've loved learning that during highschool hehe that was a picture of Markos the lead Kossack, not an actually Cossack :) |
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Ambitwistor
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skullkrusher
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| Jumpedthefark
1. Near term limit 2. Create 400,000 man enforcer army 3. ???? 4. profit!!! |
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23FPB23
![]() |
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| CygnusDarius
skullkrusher: CygnusDarius: skullkrusher: [graphics8.nytimes.com image 190x229] might wanna rethink your plan, Russia. This guy isn't very intimidating That's what they want you to think. /I would've loved learning that during highschool hehe that was a picture of Markos the lead Kossack, not an actually Cossack :) That's what the want you to think. /Dun dun duuuun |
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RoyBatty
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| Gyrfalcon Oh, this should be good. The Reds AND the Whites under one banner. Next, Putin is going to revive the riders of the Golden Horde and sweep across the steppes. |
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| miscreant
Action movie has-beens turned bigoted conspiracy theorist fundies? |
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| krampus503
TV's Vinnie: [images.persephonemagazine.com image 300x225] Dat sounds like a great idea, doesn't it Dommy? Oh yeh Kubla! Dat would be freekin' epic! / Came for Kubla Kraus, leaving satisfied. |
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| LewDux
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| The Faywood Assassin
What started as almost humorous, became pretty dark and ominous by the end of the article. |
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| Trucker
Old and over-rated? |
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| KiTTeNs_on_AciD
"Anti-semite slippery cossack slut" |
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| I_Can't_Believe_it's_not_Boutros My Cossack's back, and you're gonna be in trouble. |
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| quansem
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| Day_Old_Dutchie
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| Agarista
I thought Cossacks were ethnic Ukrainians living along the quietly flowing Don River... |
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| Now That's What I Call a Taco!
The Faywood Assassin: What started as almost humorous, became pretty dark and ominous by the end of the article. I agree. This could end up being not funny at all. Especially the "cracking down on Muslims in Sochi" part. |
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| Cajnik
"They are just like Cossacks, and they work for the government, but they're welcomed with open arms. How come this should be allowed in America, but not in Russia, with our rich Cossack traditions? We're like Chuck Norris!" Gulichev said Somehow I think this came out more like "They have similar to Coassacks. They work for government, but OK. Why this allowed in America but not Russia? It is Cossack Chuck Norris!" |
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That Guy in the Dos Equis Commercials
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| semiotix The tears of a Cossack cure hemophilia. Too bad for the Romanovs that no Cossack has ever cried. Cossacks on the Zaporozhian Sich don't swim; the water of the Kakhovka Reservoir just wants to be around them. The distinctive fleece hats that Cossack men wear have come to be known as "Cossack hats." For a similar reason, so has your mother. |
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| MythDragon What about the Goddamn Mongorians? |
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| TeddyRooseveltsMustache
Russia never changes. Too muck vodak. |
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| Jackpot777
What is it with Eastern Europe and Chuck Norris? It's like when Slovakia was going to name a bridge after him. Which wouldn't have worked because ( •_•) nobody crosses Chuck Norris ( •_•)>⌐■-■ and lives... (⌐■_■) |
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| Skirl Hutsenreiter
semiotix: The tears of a Cossack cure hemophilia. Too bad for the Romanovs that no Cossack has ever cried. I know of one Cossack who cried every time he talked about the little Tsar and the dowager Empress. He was an impressionable 19 year old in the Imperial Guard when the Revolution started, and those two really endeared themselves to him for a lifetime. He used to tell about an incident when he first started in the Imperial Guard. He was stationed in a hall that was lined with these huge gilded mirrors. The old Tsarina is passing through the hall alone when he accidentally fumbles his rifle. It hits the ground, goes off, and shatters one of these massive mirrors. He's totally dumbstruck by this catastrophe: not only has he destroyed an expensive item, he endangered one of the royal family in the process. The old Tsarina sees he's totally distraught, and she just smiles, walks over to another mirror, and gives it a real solid whack with her cane. The mirror shatters, and she turns back to him and says, "If anyone gives you any trouble, just say that crazy old lady was smashing up the place." |
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| pute kisses like a man
i'm sure this will end poorly. |
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| Slowdog
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| DjangoStonereaver A nice Jewish girl of my acquaintance always claimed that one of her forebearers was a Cossack and a Jew. If you knew her, this might go a long way to explaining her unique mental processes. |
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| Bad_Seed
DjangoStonereaver: A nice Jewish girl of my acquaintance always claimed that one of her forebearers was a Cossack and a Jew. If you knew her, this might go a long way to explaining her unique mental processes. Neurotic and violent? |
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| DjangoStonereaver Bad_Seed: DjangoStonereaver: A nice Jewish girl of my acquaintance always claimed that one of her forebearers was a Cossack and a Jew. If you knew her, this might go a long way to explaining her unique mental processes. Neurotic and violent? Yup. I love her to death, though: she has a good heart for all the other stuff. /Never dated her, though, so that might explain my feelings. |
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| optional
Retro is never as badass as the real thing. Here are the old school Cossacks. |
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| optional
Crap, didn't post the pic. Here it is. |
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