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   After hours of research, chefs across the United States have agreed to a solution to the "Frankenfish" invasion. What's that you say? It is to eat them

27 Nov 2012 01:52 PM   |   11347 clicks   |   Yahoo
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brap    [TotalFark]  
WOLVERINES!!!!! 

NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM
 
(That actually would have made a better sequel, having a rogue band of American rebels run out of Twinkies and actually eat the invading Korean army.)

27 Nov 2012 12:44 PM
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rikdanger    [TotalFark]  
I highly recommend Jackson Lander's book about snakeheads and other invasive species. Very entertaining, but his account of his attempt to hunt feral pigs on the Virginia barrier islands, which were completely frustrated by the local fish and wildlife service and the USDA, were enough to make me wanna throw my Kindle out the window.

Eating Aliens: One Man's Adventures Hunting Invasive Animal Species (pops)

27 Nov 2012 01:11 PM
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unyon    [TotalFark]  
If they really want to make a dent, they need to rename them. Even using Channa argus is an upgrade over Snakehead.

Asian whitefish ought to do nicely.

27 Nov 2012 01:15 PM
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dittybopper    [TotalFark]  
Wrong answer. That's treating them like a game fish.

The correct answer is to put a bounty on their heads, one lucrative enough that it's economically attractive to kill them, with no limit on what a person can earn. *THEN* you will get rid of them.

27 Nov 2012 01:56 PM
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meat0918    [TotalFark]  
Dammit people.

Frankenfish are GMO fish that have been modified to glow in the dark so it's easier for fisherman to illegally spear fish for them at night.

Invasive species are tasty tasty treats that Americans need to buck up and get used too.

27 Nov 2012 01:57 PM
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Crockett     

unyon: If they really want to make a dent, they need to rename them. Even using Channa argus is an upgrade over Snakehead.

Asian whitefish ought to do nicely.


Bingo. Chilean Sea Bass > Patagonian Toothfish.

/it's all about the marketing

27 Nov 2012 01:58 PM
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Drunken_Polar_Bear    [TotalFark]  
I've had snakehead. It's actually pretty good. What they should do is point the snakeheads at all the Asian carp, thus resulting in no Asian carp and lots and lots of nice fat snakeheads to nom.

27 Nov 2012 01:58 PM
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ringersol     
TFA: "Probably if it was called any other name than snakehead, people would be more willing to give them a try,"

"Chilean Sea Bass" suggests this is a trivially solvable problem.

27 Nov 2012 01:58 PM
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Day_Old_Dutchie     
How do you solve the Frankenfish problem?
img443.imageshack.us
With an angry mob, torches and pitchforks, of course.

27 Nov 2012 02:01 PM
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FunkOut    [TotalFark]  

meat0918: Dammit people.

Frankenfish are GMO fish that have been modified to glow in the dark so it's easier for fisherman to illegally spear fish for them at night.

Invasive species are tasty tasty treats that Americans need to buck up and get used too.


Spicy Asian stir fry can be the solution to all this.

27 Nov 2012 02:03 PM
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Plant Rights Activist     

unyon: If they really want to make a dent, they need to rename them. Even using Channa argus is an upgrade over Snakehead.

Asian whitefish ought to do nicely.


why not just Whitesnake Fish?

27 Nov 2012 02:04 PM
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pute kisses like a man     

Crockett: unyon: If they really want to make a dent, they need to rename them. Even using Channa argus is an upgrade over Snakehead.

Asian whitefish ought to do nicely.

Bingo. Chilean Sea Bass > Patagonian Toothfish.

/it's all about the marketing


and chilean sea bass is so good, too. i'd eat it by any other name. will try happily try snakehead, whatever it's name may be in the future.

/ next, they should rename nutria rats as river pig or something

27 Nov 2012 02:04 PM
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Magorn    [TotalFark]  

dittybopper: Wrong answer. That's treating them like a game fish.

The correct answer is to put a bounty on their heads, one lucrative enough that it's economically attractive to kill them, with no limit on what a person can earn. *THEN* you will get rid of them.


The British tired that in India to rid itself of a cobra problem. It led to an increase in the overall cobra population as people began to breed them to cash in on the bounties

27 Nov 2012 02:05 PM
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CygnusDarius     
Who wants ceviche?.

blog.tonychachere.com

27 Nov 2012 02:05 PM
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Pinner     
msnbcmedia3.msn.com 

hot. like the grill it belongs on.

27 Nov 2012 02:06 PM
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proteon     
Chef suggest we eat them? That's incredible.

27 Nov 2012 02:07 PM
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Akabander     
I ate snakehead in Malaysia, served Cantonese style. The fish was cut into bite-sized morsels, then cooked in a wok with ginger, soy sauce, garlic, sesame oil, and spring onions. The meat was firm, more dense than most fresh-water fish, and somewhat oily. The flavor was strong but pleasant, suitable for the robust flavors of the other ingredients.

Given the firmness and oiliness of the fish, it's probably quite forgiving to cook.

Definitely could use rebranding, though. And they're hideously ugly in person -- I checked them out before dinner, as they were kept live in plastic tubs in a corner of the restaurant. Someone needs to get right on designing a cute anime-style version for marketing purposes.

27 Nov 2012 02:07 PM
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Sail The Wide Accountancy     
How about Guardian Fish?

27 Nov 2012 02:08 PM
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oldfarthenry    [TotalFark]  
Eat the problem? Geesh, 'merikuh! That's your answer to EVERYTHING!

27 Nov 2012 02:08 PM
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Englebert Slaptyback     

What's that you say? It is to eat them


There needs to be a 'Battle Snakehead' on Iron Chef America to get the word out.

Also, make the Frankenfish one of the surprise basket ingredients on 'Chopped'.

27 Nov 2012 02:08 PM
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oldfarthenry    [TotalFark]  
"Can remain out of water for three or four days"

Great, the things are going to crawl out of the river and steal my minivan for a crime spree!

27 Nov 2012 02:10 PM
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I_Can't_Believe_it's_not_Boutros     
My suggestion: start a rumor in China that ground Frankenfish liver (or some other small organ) will make your penis larger and cure erectile dysfunction.

27 Nov 2012 02:10 PM
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GoldSpider     
At Tony & Joe's, snakehead appetizers cost $10 to $11, and entrees about $26. Maryland is the only state with a commercial market and the limited supply is keeping prices high.

How about starting there?

27 Nov 2012 02:11 PM
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Pinner     

oldfarthenry: Eat the problem? Geesh, 'merikuh! That's your answer to EVERYTHING!


I'm gobbling up porn as fast as I can to help out.

27 Nov 2012 02:11 PM
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wildcardjack     

dittybopper: Wrong answer. That's treating them like a game fish.

The correct answer is to put a bounty on their heads, one lucrative enough that it's economically attractive to kill them, with no limit on what a person can earn. *THEN* you will get privately owned breeding tanks of them.


FTFY.

Paul Doumer, an official in French Indo-China (modern Vietnam) set out to get the rats out of the sewer by paying crews by the tail. In the begining they were pulling a thousand tails a day, in a few month they were pulling forty thousand a day. Because he was incentivizing the people to breed rats for their tails.

If he'd figured out a way to get the people to eat more of them all would have worked. Jobs are created by consumption. If wild harvested snakeheads are demanded in increasing quantities by restaurants you have a market that sets the price. IF you have an UNLIMITED demand established by the government with no care about the quality of the meat then you risk incentivizing a private breeding program.

27 Nov 2012 02:12 PM
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pkellmey     
I believe we should eat all invaders. It's the only solution.

27 Nov 2012 02:13 PM
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libranoelrose    [TotalFark]  

I_Can't_Believe_it's_not_Boutros: My suggestion: start a rumor in China that ground Frankenfish liver (or some other small organ) will make your penis larger and cure erectile dysfunction.


Would totally work.

27 Nov 2012 02:14 PM
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pkellmey     

I_Can't_Believe_it's_not_Boutros: My suggestion: start a rumor in China that ground Frankenfish liver (or some other small organ) will make your penis larger and cure erectile dysfunction.


I read that as "crocodile" dysfunction for some reason. Talk about something that creates strange pictures in your head.

27 Nov 2012 02:15 PM
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Pair-o-Dice     

pkellmey: I believe we should eat all invaders. It's the only solution.


Mexicans too?

27 Nov 2012 02:16 PM
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Jument     

Magorn: dittybopper: Wrong answer. That's treating them like a game fish.

The correct answer is to put a bounty on their heads, one lucrative enough that it's economically attractive to kill them, with no limit on what a person can earn. *THEN* you will get rid of them.

The British tired that in India to rid itself of a cobra problem. It led to an increase in the overall cobra population as people began to breed them to cash in on the bounties


It also costs taxpayers money. If we eat them, there's no cost to taxpayers.

Of course, if we eat enough of them then enterprising people will farm them. So maybe this is not such a great idea after all.

27 Nov 2012 02:19 PM
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pkellmey     

Pair-o-Dice: pkellmey: I believe we should eat all invaders. It's the only solution.

Mexicans too?


No, too spicy. We should just send Taco Bell to them. Problem solved.

27 Nov 2012 02:21 PM
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whither_apophis     
From the Office of The President of The USA:

Don't kill snakeheads, I had one as a pet in Indonesia as a kid.

Thanks,
Obama-daddy

/solved

27 Nov 2012 02:21 PM
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JNowe     
But the snakehead stands out among its invasive peers because its slab-like flesh and its minimal shrinkage is seemingly ideal for white-tablecloth restaurants.

Penis.

27 Nov 2012 02:22 PM
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willfullyobscure     
because pigs, chickens, ducks and cows have all been decimated by human consumption.

27 Nov 2012 02:22 PM
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Matrix Flavored Wasabi     

meat0918: Dammit people.

Frankenfish are GMO fish that have been modified to glow in the dark so it's easier for fisherman to illegally spear fish for them at night.

Invasive species are tasty tasty treats that Americans need to buck up and get used too.


Frankenfish

27 Nov 2012 02:23 PM
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BradleyUffner     
According to the article there is still no sign of them affecting the population numbers of the native species. If this hold true, and the snake heads are tasty, what's the problem with treating them like a normal game fish?

27 Nov 2012 02:24 PM
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megarian    [TotalFark]  

Plant Rights Activist: unyon: If they really want to make a dent, they need to rename them. Even using Channa argus is an upgrade over Snakehead.

Asian whitefish ought to do nicely.

why not just Whitesnake Fish?


\m/

27 Nov 2012 02:24 PM
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Millennium     
This is Fark; aren't we supposed to call them the walking Chinese death fish over here?

Probably still a better name than "snakehead." You could sell them to reality shows as menu items.

27 Nov 2012 02:27 PM
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jafiwam     

Akabander: Given the firmness and oiliness of the fish, it's probably quite forgiving to cook.


Nuggets, battered and deep fried.

Gotta go where America shines...

27 Nov 2012 02:28 PM
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Captain Steroid    [TotalFark]  
TO ARMS! :O

i257.photobucket.com

27 Nov 2012 02:28 PM
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ltdanman44     
mysterial.org.uk


Come at me, bro

27 Nov 2012 02:29 PM
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realmojo     
www.wrongwroks.com

27 Nov 2012 02:29 PM
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fireclown     
Just fish for 'em. When I see a snakehead, I see a northern pike. Which is a sport fish worth seeking out. And with snakeheads there is no size minimum and no creel limit.

27 Nov 2012 02:34 PM
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Prevailing Wind     
OK...Yay. I get to be the filterpwning word!

I actually caught one of these when I was a kid damn near 4-5 years before they became a news item in Maryland. I remember thinking it was a farked up eel. As was my family's practice at the time, we ate the shiat of it. As we started catching more and more of them in the river, we eventually settled on two preferred recipes that are pretty accessible for your water man type Marylander.

Snake head chowder.

Roasted Garlic
1 can of hunts tomatoes with chiles
1/2 stick of butter
3 cubed potatoes
2 stalks of celery
2 carrots
about 1 qt chicken stock
bay leaf
Old Bay
parsley
chives
about 1 lb of snake head meat cut into chunks.
1 crab (whole)
some flour for a roux

Melt your butter and add enough flour to make a thin paste, keep it on low temp and stirring until you get a caramel color.
add your stock slowly until its incorporated with the roux.
add other ingredients, put on medium heat for 1 hour.

Pretty damn tasty.


Grilled Snakehead (lot simpler)


take a nice filet of the stuff (it really is a good firm grilling meat) and slather it with the following.

olive oil, salt, pepper, lemon juice, minced garlic, parsley, Parmesan cheese.

Wrap it up in foil and toss it on the grill.
right before its done, remove it from the foil and reserve the coating and toss the meat on the grill to get a char. serve with the coating crumbled up on top.

27 Nov 2012 02:36 PM
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IRQ12     

willfullyobscure: because pigs, chickens, ducks and cows have all been decimated by human consumption.


No, just the ecosystem required to mass produce them.

27 Nov 2012 02:37 PM
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mark12A     
unyon: If they really want to make a dent, they need to rename them. Even using Channa argus is an upgrade over Snakehead.

Asian whitefish ought to do nicely.

Bingo. Chilean Sea Bass > Patagonian Toothfish.

/it's all about the marketing


How about "Langostino Tuna"?

27 Nov 2012 02:45 PM
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not5am     

dittybopper: Wrong answer. That's treating them like a game fish.

The correct answer is to put a bounty on their heads, one lucrative enough that it's economically attractive to kill them, with no limit on what a person can earn. *THEN* you will get rid of them.


or tell mcdonalds they have a new source for their filet-o-fish sandwiches.

27 Nov 2012 02:47 PM
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Pinner     

mark12A: unyon: If they really want to make a dent, they need to rename them. Even using Channa argus is an upgrade over Snakehead.

Asian whitefish ought to do nicely.

Bingo. Chilean Sea Bass > Patagonian Toothfish.

/it's all about the marketing

How about "Langostino Tuna"?


Tubefishsteak

27 Nov 2012 02:50 PM
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crabsno termites     

unyon: If they really want to make a dent, they need to rename them. Even using Channa argus is an upgrade over Snakehead.

Asian whitefish ought to do nicely.


Dolphin = "Flipper" = very affordable and tasty.

Dolphin = Mahi Mahi = yuppie fare and so expensive I no longer buy it.

/old

27 Nov 2012 02:50 PM
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fireclown     

mark12A: How about "Langostino Tuna"?


"maryland pike"

27 Nov 2012 02:50 PM
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