Weed delivery service?

Someone's been watching It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia.

every business exploits laziness

$20/month? I'd just pile my trash in front of a paying customer's apartment.

That would have been handy when I was recovering from a torn ACL at my old elevatorless apartments. Groceries were murder.

"Tom Johnson shows you how he does it."

I... work the wood until it is smooth and I ... oil the wood until it is... dark.

/Obscure?

But isn't picking up trash physical labor? Who wants to do physical labor?

What he doesn't tell you about his business is that if you're a hot girl, he will dig around in your garbage and sniff your tampons.

ThrnPhl: Someone's been watching It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia.

He should get a limo and wear a tux!

Odds are that these same lazy farks that use their student loan money to pay someone to take out their trash will also be biatching and moaning about the unreasonable student loan debt they've acquired in a few years. Meanwhile the notion of "minimizing unnecessary expenses to reduce the amount you need to borrow" is over their heads.

Does he let 4'7 old Asian women pick through to get the cans first?

Sybarite: Weed delivery service?

Snack Vendor. Just follow the weed delivery guy.

Next start up: Getting paid to brush people's teeth and wipe their asses.

A woman just loves a man who smells like stale beer and Ramen.

The nice thing is that not only has he tapped a niche market, but his work makes the area nicer for even those that aren't his customers. I loved college but there were some disgustingly messy and lazy people that could have really benefited from either his motivation or services there.

moothemagiccow: every business exploits laziness

Hookers don't exploit laziness.

LegacyDL: Next start up: Getting paid to brush people's teeth and wipe their asses.

Clearly you've never met a CNA or any nurse that works in assisted living.

uncleacid: A woman just loves a man who smells like stale beer and Ramen.

This is college; how would they pick him out because of it?

moothemagiccow: every business exploits laziness

Laziness or loopholes in the rules.

Incoming Cool Story Bro
Working as an equipment manager in my undergrad (got a spiffy scholarship for it, but that's another story), I picked up the players' books and returned them after every semester to the bookstore. It was coddling, but it was WAY more efficient for me to do it - I had the lists, understood the system, and called ahead to the bookstore people to get all their paperwork in order. The nice thing was at the end of the semester, everything (including the non-returnable stuff like workbooks) had to be ATTEMPTED to be returned. If it was attempted, and the bookstore didn't buy it back, the girls in the store would mark it returned in accordance with policy. They (the girls) said they didn't want the useless stuff/books the university wasn't buying back, and neither did the athletic department secretaries (who are supposed to keep the extras stored in a closet if it's needed again).

I sold the surplus stuff on Amazon 2 weeks before the semester started (highest demand point) and pocketed approximately $150 per semester of profit. At 2 hours each way (buying and returning) and buying a couple of small boxes of candy to keep the right people happy enough to overlook the fact that I WAS committing fraud by signing other players' names, I still came out ahead.

/Why yes, I was a finance major

Teresaol31: Odds are that these same lazy farks that use their student loan money to pay someone to take out their trash will also be biatching and moaning about the unreasonable student loan debt they've acquired in a few years. Meanwhile the notion of "minimizing unnecessary expenses to reduce the amount you need to borrow" is over their heads.

This. $20/month for this trivial chore? I pay somebody $12/hour for about 6 hours a month and she takes out my trash, changes my sheets, sorts my laundry, does whatever dishes are still in the sink, picks up my groceries, vacuums my floors, and scrubs my counters because I can make twice that with the extra time.

Mom and dad must be so proud to know that they're taking out loans so that their drunk kid can fail the opportunity cost section on their microecon exam.

Old news

/subby is lazy

CygnusDarius: Hookers don't exploit laziness.

You could score legal pussy if you had the motivation and skills, but since that can be a LOT of work you have prostitutes.

I feel that surgeons don't exploit laziness directly. Even if you taught yourself surgery, you can't do it on your own. Now, what gets the patient on that table may be years of laziness, but that's not always the case; the person could have been hit by a falling flower pot while training for a marathon.

What next? A toilet flushing service - or a flatulence fanning one?

Lazy dumb-ass kids!

I guess this guy has never thought about blowing his load into a paper towel that can't be flushed.

moothemagiccow: every business exploits laziness

Came in here to say exactly this. How is this different from any other cleaning service? The service sector makes up a little less than 70% of the US Economy, including a multitude of companies that (gasp!) take garbage from your house to the dump. It's not a municipal thing everywhere.

factoryconnection: CygnusDarius: Hookers don't exploit laziness.

You could score legal pussy if you had the motivation and skills, but since that can be a LOT of work you have prostitutes.

I feel that surgeons don't exploit laziness directly. Even if you taught yourself surgery, you can't do it on your own. Now, what gets the patient on that table may be years of laziness, but that's not always the case; the person could have been hit by a falling flower pot while training for a marathon.

Opportunity cost and the division of labor are factors here.

Even if you're an incredibly industrious person with nothing else to do your time, it's probably still more cost-effective to buy your produce from a profitable supermarket than it is to attempt subsistence farming. Beyond that, though, even if the figures work out, you probably have something else to do and it's worthwhile to do that, spend the $5 for some fresh vegetables, and skip saving the dollar by tending your own garden.

"Tom Johnson shows you how he does it."

He fixes the cable?

ThrnPhl: Someone's been watching It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia.


Over in two.

freewill: Teresaol31: Odds are that these same lazy farks that use their student loan money to pay someone to take out their trash will also be biatching and moaning about the unreasonable student loan debt they've acquired in a few years. Meanwhile the notion of "minimizing unnecessary expenses to reduce the amount you need to borrow" is over their heads.

This. $20/month for this trivial chore? I pay somebody $12/hour for about 6 hours a month and she takes out my trash, changes my sheets, sorts my laundry, does whatever dishes are still in the sink, picks up my groceries, vacuums my floors, and scrubs my counters because I can make twice that with the extra time.

Mom and dad must be so proud to know that they're taking out loans so that their drunk kid can fail the opportunity cost section on their microecon exam.

I was just thinking about how this guy screwed up in having to do the work himself. He should be able to get the contracts for a hundred apartment complexes and outsource the labor to poor folk who don't know how to arrange for Paypal subscriptions. He might only keep $10 per apartment per month of that but he can do it for more than he could ever keep up with.

And you, Mr, Freewill, have screwed up in having to work 40+ hours a week. If you were to change things so you made $100 an hour you could have enough free time you wouldn't need to hire someone to come into your house. Okay, I might have boundary issues here, but still. You've mastered the first half of outsourcing your life, look around and see if you can perhaps get someone else to be your biatch and do the little things that take up time.

My name is Joel Goodson. I deal in human fulfillment. I grossed over eight thousand dollars in one night. Time of your life, huh kid?

cig-mkr: But isn't picking up trash physical labor? Who wants to do physical labor?

It's college kids' trash. How much can a bag of empty beer cans & pizza boxes weigh?

dustygrimp: "Tom Johnson shows you how he does it."

I... work the wood until it is smooth and I ... oil the wood until it is... dark.

/Obscure?

I know the words, but cannot remember the source...someone help or it will drive me mad

Sybarite: Weed delivery service?

My neighbor gets his delivered.

How very bootstrappy of him.

factoryconnection: CygnusDarius: Hookers don't exploit laziness.

You could score legal pussy if you had the motivation and skills, but since that can be a LOT of work you have prostitutes.

I feel that surgeons don't exploit laziness directly. Even if you taught yourself surgery, you can't do it on your own. Now, what gets the patient on that table may be years of laziness, but that's not always the case; the person could have been hit by a falling flower pot while training for a marathon.

specialization=same results, less effortlaziness

We had a similar apt complex in college, when the trash would pile up, I'd go to my roommate and say ok, we need to make a trash run. We'd just go out super late at night and find a big dumpster behind a walmart or some mini mall. It was a mad monkey dash of whipping bags of trash into the thing and getting the hell out.

wildcardjack: I was just thinking about how this guy screwed up in having to do the work himself. He should be able to get the contracts for a hundred apartment complexes and outsource the labor to poor folk who don't know how to arrange for Paypal subscriptions. He might only keep $10 per apartment per month of that but he can do it for more than he could ever keep up with.

There's definitely a limit to how much he can scale this at that price, and if he's already going to their doors, he should really figure out other add-on services to make the trips more cost effective and add value to paying him to show up. I can justify paying someone $20/month to take the garbage away from my door and, say, bring my groceries or even hot meals to the door, but $20 just to save me a weekly trip down the stairs? Uh, nah. That's so trivial that it doesn't disrupt my other obligations.

And you, Mr, Freewill, have screwed up in having to work 40+ hours a week. If you were to change things so you made $100 an hour you could have enough free time you wouldn't need to hire someone to come into your house. Okay, I might have boundary issues here, but still. You've mastered the first half of outsourcing your life, look around and see if you can perhaps get someone else to be your biatch and do the little things that take up time.

While you're right about the whole needing to take it further thing, if I had the same amount of income and more free time, I think I'd still find other productive/rewarding (if not necessarily profitable) things to do with it before I'd spend 45 minutes fighting my way through the RPG dungeon that is our local supermarket. I'd volunteer, catch up on my reading, develop a new hobby, have more sex, or something. That's just me, though.

/ Then again, I'm on Fark right now.

freewill: Opportunity cost and the division of labor are factors here.

Of course it comes down to opportunity cost. I was just thinking of an industry that it doesn't matter what the opportunity cost is; the buyer cannot circumvent going to a professional. Surgery came to my mind first. Surrogate mothers are another one.

Son of Streak: dustygrimp: "Tom Johnson shows you how he does it."

I... work the wood until it is smooth and I ... oil the wood until it is... dark.

/Obscure?

I know the words, but cannot remember the source...someone help or it will drive me mad

I googled a part of the phrase and this thread was the eighth hit.

BarkingUnicorn: cig-mkr: But isn't picking up trash physical labor? Who wants to do physical labor?

It's college kids' trash. How much can a bag of empty beer cans & pizza boxes weigh?

No much, but it takes time away from Facebook and Fark.

wildcardjack: Son of Streak: dustygrimp: "Tom Johnson shows you how he does it."

I... work the wood until it is smooth and I ... oil the wood until it is... dark.

/Obscure?

I know the words, but cannot remember the source...someone help or it will drive me mad

I googled a part of the phrase and this thread was the eighth hit.

google search with "tom johnson" and either part of the phrase has this thread as the first hit. the phrase is very familiar but i can't remember where. was it the dailyshow or the soup?

CygnusDarius: moothemagiccow: every business exploits laziness

Hookers don't exploit laziness.

They exploit the laziness of not finding a real girlfriend. Also, they exploit the laziness of people who don't go to the gym.

Is it ok to take a deuce in the trash before this kid picks up my shiat?

iheartscotch: CygnusDarius: moothemagiccow: every business exploits laziness

Hookers don't exploit laziness.

They exploit the laziness of not finding a real girlfriend. Also, they exploit the laziness of people who don't go to the gym.

Isn't that what porn is about?.

Ok, a list of professions that don't exploit on laziness:

Surgeon
Bomb Expert
Wild life photographer

CygnusDarius: Bomb Expert

I thought of EOD technician as well, but figured that if my buddy (a master tech in the Navy) found a bomb in his garage, he could go ahead and try to defeat it if he had his bomb suit in the truck. But it is probably better for even that situation to at least call a support team.

occamswrist: I guess this guy has never thought about blowing his load into a paper towel that can't be flushed.

Yes they can

The apartments and filled with students and trash. And in Florida, those are usually one in the same.

I need to have some electrical work done in my house. At the bare minimum, getting a few GFCI outlets installed, or at best running a new ground and installing new outlets. I've done this kind of work before, so I technically know how to do it, but I also know one other fact: I am a certified dumbass and would risk electrocuting myself or burning the place down if I did the work myself.

Now, I could go to and spend the cash required to attend electrician college or school or whatever, get a bunch of insurance to cover my own work, and then do the work myself, or I could simply hire some non-dumbass who already has insurance, and have them do it. In the long run, it's going to be much, much cheaper to hire someone and get the job done right, rather than me laying out the startup costs to get to the point where I'm capable of doing it. In this case, the electrician is not profiting off of my laziness, he's profiting (as am I) off of his experience, skill and insurance.

However, in this scenario, I am actually profiting off of my own laziness because I haven't bothered to actually find an electrician yet, so the work's just not getting done at all.

/slashies for profit

JBangworthy: The apartments and filled with students and trash. And in Florida, those are usually one in the same.

This are funnies. Stupid Florida, I am much smart.

CygnusDarius: moothemagiccow: every business exploits laziness

Hookers don't exploit laziness.

Seduction is work. Hookers bypass seduction.

this...