Don't ask what happened to that.



You don't want to know, man.

You. Don't. Want. To. Know.

If you are using FedEx to ship three kilos of meth and 100 grams of cocaine to the Philippines, I have no trouble believing you'd be stupid enough to call about it

MaudlinMutantMollusk: If you are using FedEx to ship three kilos of meth and 100 grams of cocaine to the Philippines, I have no trouble believing you'd be stupid enough to call about it

If you watch David Lynch's "Twin Peaks" and write down a list of all of the things that make the town of Twin Peaks appealing and interesting, and arguably even "fascinating" and worth looking into, and then imagine the same town, but without everything that you wrote on that list, you've got Redwood City.

FloydA: MaudlinMutantMollusk: If you are using FedEx to ship three kilos of meth and 100 grams of cocaine to the Philippines, I have no trouble believing you'd be stupid enough to call about it

If you watch David Lynch's "Twin Peaks" and write down a list of all of the things that make the town of Twin Peaks appealing and interesting, and arguably even "fascinating" and worth looking into, and then imagine the same town, but without everything that you wrote on that list, you've got Redwood City.

My ex-wife was from Redwood City

/yeah... I know

Well, there goes my weekend.

Shipping Bad

Dude. DUDE! DOOOOOOOODE!!!!~~~~~! Dija git Dija git Dija git Dija git Dija git Did you get the STUFF???? I meannnnnnnnnn. Where izzzzzzzzzzz it?
I shipped it?!?!?!
WHEEEEEEEEEEERE IZZZZZZZ iT?

Customer servce: Do you have a tracking number, sir?

...and he doesn't know it...you forgot that part.

I've heard UPS or a private courier are a much better bet. Also, is it really that hard to avoid detection if there's no dogs involved? Did they slip up and label the bags 'cocaine' instead of 'flour' or 'confectioners' sugar?'

Does cocaine or meth really have a smell or do the dogs sniff out solvents?

Instead of shipping it, which would take a lot of time, I would had sent it by air freight. That's faster. I mean look how long it took MacArthur to return by boat.

They should just put it in those balikbayan boxes.

Police are keeping 2 Kilos of Meth and 50 grams of cocaine as evidence

"They claimed I did what?!"

This guy would be sentenced to death in the Philippines. I'm not kidding. That's the penalty for drug trafficking here.

They wouldn't kill him, because there's a nation wide moratorium on executions, but still..

Better call Saul.

I ordered a new guitar on Monday and today I received a package full of white powder and some kind of crystal like substance.

Then I found this story on fark. I wonder if there's a connection?

Also, where the fark is my guitar?

Vector R: I've heard UPS or a private courier are a much better bet. Also, is it really that hard to avoid detection if there's no dogs involved? Did they slip up and label the bags 'cocaine' instead of 'flour' or 'confectioners' sugar?'

From my understanding FedEx is actually a prevalent choice. The UPS allows the Feds to pie around, and they share a lot of stuff with the USPS. FedEx only allows dogs with a warrant. A large percentage of drugs travels by FedEx apparently.

/Buddy is a customs agent, works with the DEA a lot
//still don't know if its true seeds are considered fruit at the border, and you can't get in trouble ordering them. Urban legend?

Oh, and I do know a bunch of folks who FedEx weed to where they're going. Put a bullshiat return address and ship to hotel. Easier than the TSA is the idea.

Package for Dave.

Dave's not here man....

Someone trying to smuggle drugs OUT of the country? That's a new one.

FloydA: If you watch David Lynch's "Twin Peaks" and write down a list of all of the things that make the town of Twin Peaks appealing and interesting, and arguably even "fascinating" and worth looking into, and then imagine the same town, but without everything that you wrote on that list, you've got Redwood City.

I'd say it's even less interesting than that.

/grew up near Redwood City

wildcardjack: Does cocaine or meth really have a smell or do the dogs sniff out solvents?

As a dog trainer I can tell you that dogs can sniff out things that you wouldn't believe. A lot of times it comes down to trainers train the dog with the object, and then they track it or detect it, at which point we go "Huh, guess it does have a smell" So, might be the solvent, might be the drug, dunno, but the dog does. I've known corpse detecting dogs that have found 2 year old corpses at the bottom of a 35 foot deep lake while riding on a boat. We're still not sure how they can smell cancer tumors, and detect epileptic seizures before they happen.
They're not infallible though, the accuracy comes down to the training of the dog and the relationship and skill of the handler.

There was no FedEx shipment.

CruJones: Vector R: I've heard UPS or a private courier are a much better bet. Also, is it really that hard to avoid detection if there's no dogs involved? Did they slip up and label the bags 'cocaine' instead of 'flour' or 'confectioners' sugar?'

From my understanding FedEx is actually a prevalent choice. The UPS allows the Feds to pie around, and they share a lot of stuff with the USPS. FedEx only allows dogs with a warrant. A large percentage of drugs travels by FedEx apparently.

/Buddy is a customs agent, works with the DEA a lot
//still don't know if its true seeds are considered fruit at the border, and you can't get in trouble ordering them. Urban legend?

Thats not quite accurate. It was FedEx and the USPS that had a deal, hence why you'd see FedEx drop boxes infront of post offices.

MaudlinMutantMollusk: If you are using FedEx to ship three kilos of meth and 100 grams of cocaine to the Philippines, I have no trouble believing you'd be stupid enough to call about it

This.

They don't have meth ingredients in the Phillippines?

I had a friend who worked as a driver for FEDEX for 20 years, late 70-late 90s. He said it was easy to profile a drug containing pkg., check it, and return it to the belt to be resorted, minus a portion of its contents. mostly weed, ludes, coke and laundered cash. One time the corner of a wrapped pkg was torn, unraveled, and weed was seen spilling out. by the time the sorting belt went around once, it was gone. One driver mentioned it to a supervisor and there were some suspensions and firings that day.

studebaker hoch: There was no FedEx shipment.

This is not the FedEx shipment you are looking for...

Z-clipped: This guy would be sentenced to death in the Philippines. I'm not kidding. That's the penalty for drug trafficking here.

They wouldn't kill him, because there's a nation wide moratorium on executions, but still..

Not to mention that they abolished the death penalty in 2006 and commuted all the death sentences to life in prison.

Still, prison in the Philippines probably isn't that great of a place to spend the rest of your life, but they sometimes re-enact music videos like Thriller and Gangam Style so they've got that going for them.

Came for Hedberg...

/left satisfied