Vile forms of Necros lie rotting my mind
Feasting like maggots - maggots in flesh
So left your ruined cortex behind
Now the maggot knows glee as it nibbles on your spine!

WHAT??

Khan approves this thread

I got a what in my ear? Aint cha supposed ta call em gays now?

Now I'm going to have that earworm all day... THANKS

Maggot are falling, falling like rain.

I have tasted the maggots in the mind of the universe. I was not offended. For I
knew I had to rise above it all. Or drown in my own shiat.

Maggots, Michael, you're eating maggots, how do they taste?

They put creatures in our ears.....

Unfortunately, this isn't surprising or rare. I've heard worse stories regarding the care of bedridden patients, specifically women patients and their feminine hygiene or lack thereof.

Yeah, no farking way am I clicking on that video.

what's that? you have maggots in your ear?

well, now you're going to have maggots in your knees, because you just pulled garden duty.

Last thing they saw.

We prefer to call it meatus acusticus externus Brachyceran fly larvae treatment. But to each his own.

It's the big deal? They make a great late-night snack

See the little maggot with the earring and the make-up
Yeah buddy that's his own hair
That little maggot got his own jet airplane
That little maggot he's a millionaire

The worms crawl in,
The worms crawl out...

KAHNNNNNNN!

Maggots... nature's cure for gangrene. That nursing home should be commended for preventing some old gummer's ear from rotting off.

Yay for for-profit, private nursing homes.

Privatized healthcare ftw

"Holy Jesus! What is that? What the fark is that? WHAT IS THAT, GRANDMA MC CANN?!??!?"
"Sir, maggots in my ear, sir!"
"Maggots in your ear?"
"Sir, yes, sir!"
"How did they get there?"
"Sir, I took them from the the nursing home, sir!"
"Are maggots allowed your room, Grandama McCann?"
"Sir, no, sir!"
"Are you allowed to have maggots Grandma McCann?"
"Sir, no, sir!"
"And why not, Grandma McCann?"
"Sir, because I'm too old and infirm, sir!"
"Because you are a disgusting worthless geriatric, Grandma McCann!"
"Sir, yes, sir!"
"Then why did you hide maggots in your ear, Grandma McCann?"
"Sir, because I was hungry, sir!"
"Because you were hungry? " [walks down the line of wheelchairs in the Nursing Home, with a fist full of maggots in his hand.]
"Grandma McCann has dishonored herself and dishonored this HOME! I have tried to help her, but I have failed! I have failed because you have not helped me! You people have not given Grandma McCann the proper motivation! So! From now on, whenever Grandma McCann farks up, I will not punish her. I will punish all of you! And the way I see it, ladies, you owe me for one fist full of EAR MAGGOTS! Now, get on your faces!"
[senior citizens slump out of their wheelchairs and get in front-leaning-rest position)
(to Grandma McCann]
"Open your mouth! " [shoves maggots in to Grandma McCann's mouth)
" They're paying for it, you eat it!"

(Grandma McCann slowly chews and cries.......)

 
/end

lunchinlewis: [blogs.houstonpress.com image 450x325]

Last thing they saw.

Fark you lewis....I was TYPING!!!!!

new definition of wet willie

Damn, I hate earworms.

They counted each one?



ONE maggot, ha ha ha!
TWO maggots, ha ha ha!

I have maggots in my scrotum.

The good news... the noises you're hearing aren't schizophrenia!

The bad news... you know what, just sit back and let the anesthetic kick in.

"And here I am breathing using my own lungs, like a sucker" - Homer Simpson

I didn't click on the story, is the person a Senator?

I mean, maggots typically eat dead rotting material, and they have shiat for brains, so I had to ask.

Another good reason to allow assisted suicide when you still have enough brains left to process it. That woman has no reason to be left alive other than make some company rich and drain the family savings.

Wasn't there a story a while back where a spider laid eggs in a kids ear? There is no way I'm googling for that story.

blatz514: Wasn't there a story a while back where a spider laid eggs in a kids ear? There is no way I'm googling for that story.

Urban Legand......

/it was his urethra

nucular bum: Maggots... nature's cure for gangrene. That nursing home should be commended for preventing some old gummer's ear from rotting off.

Beat me to it
sigh

nucular bum: Maggots... nature's cure for gangrene. That nursing home should be commended for preventing some old gummer's ear from rotting off.

Maggot therapy (link). Sure the crawling wouldn't feel nice but wouldn't the maggots just eat the wax and infectious gunk?

justanotherfarkinfarker:

Another good reason to allow assisted suicide when you still have enough brains left to process it. That woman has no reason to be left alive other than make some company rich and drain the family savings.

This.

Great green gobs of greasy grimy gopher guts
Dirty little birdies feet
Percolated monkey meat
French fried eyeballs
Dipped in a bowl of blood
Eat 'em with a spoon or straw
SLUUUURRRPP

Beetles into my carpet
Under my feet
They come out in the heat
Beetles into my carpet
Under my feet
They come out in the heat

cgraves67: Damn, I hate earworms.

I wouldn't mind calling them earmaggots.
Link
Link

The One True TheDavid: nucular bum: Maggots... nature's cure for gangrene. That nursing home should be commended for preventing some old gummer's ear from rotting off.

Maggot therapy (link). Sure the crawling wouldn't feel nice but wouldn't the maggots just eat the wax and infectious gunk?

Thanks for posting that. My mom and aunt were both RNs starting in the '30s and told us about using maggot therapy to remove necrotic tissue. I see from the Wikipedia article that it's back....a little like using leeches.

vernonFL: Unfortunately, this isn't surprising or rare. I've heard worse stories regarding the care of bedridden patients, specifically women patients and their feminine hygiene or lack thereof.

Like this one about hoo-hah maggots?

The article mentions how the patient screamed as they extracted the maggots. Alrighty then, nightmares tonight it is.

Nurglitch: The article mentions how the patient screamed as they extracted the maggots. Alrighty then, nightmares tonight it is.

"They put creatures...in our bodies..."

Gunny Highway: Maggot are falling, falling like rain.

Don't worry, there are enough for everybody.
-Horny Fly.

I will personally eat a bullet rather than be put in a nursing home.

/YMMV

I bet her ears are f*cking clean as hell now.

F*cking bleeding hearts...always finding something to biatch about

The maggots were eating dead tissue and bacteria, so as gross as it sounds they were doing her more good than harm. Likely more effective that the topical antibiotics she was given (which are far less effective than ones taken orally). One would think that the enlarged ear canal being a per-existing condition making her prone to infections and the need to periodically clean out wax, the doctor would have put her on a 10 day course of oral antibiotics 72 hours before the wax removal.

UNAUTHORIZED FINGER: I will personally eat a bullet rather than be put in a nursing home.



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