Don't look at me, I only stole Meaty Boy!

I prefer my criminals to be dumb.

As long as it wasn't a cow statue. That would be offensive to some cultures.

FTA: The man apparently paid his bill using a credit card and then picked up the ceramic statue and simply walked out.

I wonder how they will ever find this criminal mastermind?

I took a pig from a restaurant once

/but I had to bring her back for her shift the next day
//squeal

I'm thinking maybe he was gonna take it on a road trip and send pictures of the pig back to the restaurant at various landmarks.The old garden gnome on vacation"" prank. Or he's an idiot. At least he's a happy looking fellow...oh God, he's gonna have sex with it.

Oh, it's just Clinton running around high again.

apathy2673: At least he's a happy looking fellow...

orly?

  

The suspect is not wearing a hat.

What is his Fark ID?

The whole thing was totally not kosher.

Stealing Pigs ain't kosher, Sarge.

/Not a statue.
//Still relevant.

If you're dumb enough to steal a pig statue from a restaurant...

How are you even intelligent enough to breathe on your own?

Fark Rye For Many Whores: apathy2673: At least he's a happy looking fellow...

orly?
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Spit take!!!!

Oh God, not the pig gif, not again.

/It's the tongue that gets me.
///Shiver.

Summer Glau's Love Slave: Oh God, not the pig gif, not again.

/It's the tongue that gets me.
///Shiver.

Well, since you requested it

And don't let your spider friend snitch by putting your name next to it.

Knows a thing or two about stealing restaurant decorations.

nytmare: The suspect is not wearing a hat.

He can dance if he wants to.

Nothing To See Here: Stealing Pigs ain't kosher, Sarge.

"CAN THE WISE LIP, SLIBBERBERG!"

This was in Detroit. If it isnt nailed down its getting stolen or burned, usually both.