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   Verizon patents set top box that listens to what's going on in your house, then delivers targeted ads to your TV. "We can hear you now"

04 Dec 2012 08:47 AM   |   7775 clicks   |   Ars Technica
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mr_a    [TotalFark]  
1.bp.blogspot.com

04 Dec 2012 05:13 AM
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Bontesla     
This is a good headline

04 Dec 2012 06:03 AM
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This About That    [TotalFark]  
Didn't I tell you marketers are evil?

04 Dec 2012 06:14 AM
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MorrisBird    [TotalFark]  
I see it now. Cat food ads 24/7.

04 Dec 2012 06:26 AM
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PreMortem    [TotalFark]  
Mheh, the government already is through your cellphone.

04 Dec 2012 07:43 AM
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Makh    [TotalFark]  
Combine this with Fox News and you have something that could be in every room of every house.

04 Dec 2012 08:37 AM
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SurfaceTension    [TotalFark]  

PreMortem: Mheh, the government already is through your cellphone.


This has nothing to do with the government. It's entirely in the private sector.

/just goes to show how evil the private sector can be
//who do you trust more? those with a motive to get your vote or those who are motivated to get your money?

04 Dec 2012 08:47 AM
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madcan34     

SurfaceTension: //who do you trust more? those with a motive to get your vote or those who are motivated to get your money?


You seem to be under the impression they're not one and the same

04 Dec 2012 08:49 AM
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MightyPez     
More and more reason I'm feeling better about cutting the chord. I don't particularly enjoy the prospect of paying Verizon (or Comcast, or charter, et al) for the privilege of selling me.

04 Dec 2012 08:50 AM
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THX 1138     
1. Put laptop near set-top box.

2. Stream endless porn with volume up.

3. Profit.

04 Dec 2012 08:50 AM
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Prank Call of Cthulhu     
What's a set-top box?

/TiVo and cablecards FTW

04 Dec 2012 08:51 AM
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LesserEvil    [TotalFark]  
Targeted ads based on what is going on in the house... that might make for uncomfortable family visits for some Farkers...

"Hey son, why are there so many ads for anal lube, Broadway musicals, and Doc Johnson products blasting on the TV?"

04 Dec 2012 08:51 AM
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BigDamn     
Patent application != patent.

04 Dec 2012 08:52 AM
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HotWingConspiracy    [TotalFark]  
MS is already watching you via your Kinect, and it knows you really like Cheetos.

04 Dec 2012 08:52 AM
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Acharne     
Hey, if this means Verizon is conferring some amazing benefit as a result of the advertising (as I see YouTube to be) such as....say.... paying 2/3 of my rent monthly then I'd be ok with this.

04 Dec 2012 08:53 AM
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Claude Ballse     
eshop.macsales.com

Problem Solved.

04 Dec 2012 08:54 AM
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Uranus Is Huge!     
Welcome to Obama's America!

Thanks a lot libs!

04 Dec 2012 08:54 AM
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Gordon Bennett     
The next step will be to make it illegal to have an off switch on your TV.

math.ucsd.edu

04 Dec 2012 08:55 AM
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CujoQuarrel     
Is there anyone who would allow this monstrosity into their homes?

04 Dec 2012 08:56 AM
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GlobalStrategic MapleSyrup Reserve     

BigDamn: Patent application != patent.


Well you weren't supposed to read the article before commenting.

thesantadestroy.files.wordpress.com

04 Dec 2012 08:58 AM
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cookiefleck    [TotalFark]  

THX 1138: 1. Put laptop near set-top box.

2. Stream endless porn with volume up.

3. Profit.


You'd get tons of ads from Trojan brand condoms, birth control for women and viagra.

04 Dec 2012 08:58 AM
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dervish16108     
This reminds me of how North Korea has microphones in everybody's home. Instead of a communism government listening in on us, it'll be a corporatocracy with its tendrils all over the legislature and beyond.

04 Dec 2012 08:58 AM
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DeathCipris     

CujoQuarrel: Is there anyone who would allow this monstrosity into their homes?


People that A) know no better. B) don't care (the kind of people that have a public facebook/twitter profile). C) think it's neat (see brain-damaged). D) were upsold by Verizon for some bullshiat new "feature" that they have to "upgrade" for.

04 Dec 2012 08:59 AM
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dr.zaeus     

Prank Call of Cthulhu: What's a set-top box?

/TiVo and cablecards FTW


Who still has a tv with a top big enough to set anything on?

04 Dec 2012 09:00 AM
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bwilson27    [TotalFark]  
Man, fark that shiat.

04 Dec 2012 09:01 AM
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dervish16108     

DeathCipris: CujoQuarrel: Is there anyone who would allow this monstrosity into their homes?

People that A) know no better. B) don't care (the kind of people that have a public facebook/twitter profile). C) think it's neat (see brain-damaged). D) were upsold by Verizon for some bullshiat new "feature" that they have to "upgrade" for.


I wonder if those people who were in favor of the Patriot Act ("I've got nothing to hide, and you shouldn't either, citizen!") would be in favor of this too.

04 Dec 2012 09:01 AM
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wildcardjack     

PreMortem: Mheh, the government already is through your cellphone.


In the 1970's the whacko conspiracy theorists said the government was going to plant tracking devices on everyone.

If you had suggested that it would be the private sector and everyone would pay for the privilege you'd have been sent to the insane asylum.

04 Dec 2012 09:02 AM
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rufus-t-firefly     

Gordon Bennett: The next step will be to make it illegal to have an off switch on your TV.

[math.ucsd.edu image 512x384]


4.bp.blogspot.com

04 Dec 2012 09:03 AM
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Chabash     
What happens when they are forced to become mandatory reporters?

04 Dec 2012 09:03 AM
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Vegan Meat Popsicle     

BigDamn: Patent application != patent.


You seem to be confusing the way the patent office SHOULD work with the way the patent office DOES work. Why shouldn't this be a perfectly patentable idea?

04 Dec 2012 09:04 AM
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generallyso     
Next the telescreen television will shout at you for half-assing your exercise routine.

04 Dec 2012 09:05 AM
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Wellon Dowd     

Prank Call of Cthulhu: What's a set-top box?

/TiVo and cablecards FTW


But then you can't order all those interesting, affordable pay-per-view events.

04 Dec 2012 09:05 AM
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MFK     
HOW ABOUT NO? 

04 Dec 2012 09:06 AM
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Burr     

CujoQuarrel: Is there anyone who would allow this monstrosity into their homes?


Sure, just make it so that people who have it in their homes get a discount on their bill. People like to save money!

Just like how the Progressive Snapshot saves you money by recording your driving habits....

04 Dec 2012 09:06 AM
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Jim.Casy     
Some of my more paranoid friends said that my Kinect was probably doing this already. I was worried about it for a minute, but then I thought to myself "All this thing is going to learn by watching me is that I'm a lazy stoner who plays a lot of video games," which any normal person would figure out after talking to me for 5 minutes anyway.

04 Dec 2012 09:06 AM
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rooftop235    [TotalFark]  

PreMortem: Mheh, the government already is through your cellphone.


And Google. But this is not quite as weird as wanting to sit like Al Bundy and watch boobies on TV. Or what if you want to make out with your mistress, babysitter, or secretary. Then your wife comes home to find ads for STD test kits and birth control? Hell, this is worse than a damn parrot. And far more creepy.

The gub'ment don't be sending no ads to my phone based on the crap I say. In fact, I am rather surprised the men in black haven't shown up either. I guess I am small potatoes.

04 Dec 2012 09:08 AM
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Burr     

Jim.Casy: I'm a lazy stoner


Sweet, the local swat team will be by in a few minutes to break down your door, shoot your dog, and throw your ass in jail.

04 Dec 2012 09:10 AM
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InfrasonicTom     

mr_a: [1.bp.blogspot.com image 600x614]


I'm sure that thought has not crossed their mind at all. They wouldn't do something like put the camera directly next to the IR remote sensor would they?

04 Dec 2012 09:10 AM
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BoxOfBees     
I'm envisioning a mod that puts the mic and camera on a toggle so that the user can turn it on, stage a conversation, and then turn it off again.

04 Dec 2012 09:11 AM
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Badgers     
i184.photobucket.com

04 Dec 2012 09:12 AM
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JackieRabbit     
Do people still use DVRs? Seems rather last decade to me, since any content can be be streamed Netflix, Amazon, iTunes and a several other places.

So they patented it. So what? This doesn't mean that they intend to deploy it, but only to get a license fee from someone else.

04 Dec 2012 09:17 AM
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AbbeySomeone     

Chabash: What happens when they are forced to become mandatory reporters?


Forced? They'll just sell your info to the highest bidder like FB does.

04 Dec 2012 09:18 AM
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bearded clamorer    [TotalFark]  
Won't be long before I'm flooded with Beano, and Gas-X ads.

/Turn it up, biatches

04 Dec 2012 09:18 AM
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InfrasonicTom     

JackieRabbit: Do people still use DVRs? Seems rather last decade to me, since any content can be be streamed Netflix, Amazon, iTunes and a several other places.

So they patented it. So what? This doesn't mean that they intend to deploy it, but only to get a license fee from someone else.


So the license the patent to someone else who will use it? Like Motorola who builds their boxes?

04 Dec 2012 09:19 AM
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Bloody William     

BoxOfBees: I'm envisioning a mod that puts the mic and camera on a toggle so that the user can turn it on, stage a conversation, and then turn it off again.


It's called that putty stuff you use to put up posters.

04 Dec 2012 09:19 AM
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Giant Clown Shoe     
2.bp.blogspot.com

/that's what's going on over here

04 Dec 2012 09:20 AM
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Giant Clown Shoe     

bearded clamorer: Won't be long before I'm flooded with Beano, and Gas-X ads.

/Turn it up, biatches


that was close to a nice simulpost

04 Dec 2012 09:20 AM
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Crewmannumber6     
Nobody says you have to get one.

04 Dec 2012 09:21 AM
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Baz the Spaz     
www.the-prisoner-6.freeserve.co.uk

04 Dec 2012 09:21 AM
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BigDamn     

GlobalStrategic MapleSyrup Reserve: BigDamn: Patent application != patent.

Well you weren't supposed to read the article before commenting.


Gosh, thank you.
Did you read the headline?

04 Dec 2012 09:21 AM
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