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   The War on Christmas escalates into kidnapping

05 Dec 2012 06:29 PM   |   7339 clicks   |   WRCB
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moulderx1     
Whose turn was it to watch the kid?

05 Dec 2012 06:32 PM
Fark Rye For Many Whores     
You're a mean one, Mister Grinch.

/really
//who else would do that?

05 Dec 2012 06:33 PM
Pincy     
They'll probably get their baby jesus doll back before they get the real Jesus to come back.

05 Dec 2012 06:33 PM
Too_many_Brians     
Really? This made the news? How many of those crazy dolls get stolen every year and he decides that this is the year to leave it out?

05 Dec 2012 06:33 PM
occamswrist     
Since this holiday was originally a pagan celebration of the birth of the sun goddess Mirtha during the winter solstice, didn't Christianity do the hijacking?

05 Dec 2012 06:35 PM
Mega Steve     

moulderx1: Whose turn was it to watch the kid?


ionenewsone.files.wordpress.comView Full Size

05 Dec 2012 06:35 PM
Herb Utsmelz    [TotalFark]  
For Christ's sake.

05 Dec 2012 06:36 PM
KrispyKritter     

occamswrist: Since this holiday was originally a pagan celebration of the birth of the sun goddess Mirtha during the winter solstice, didn't Christianity do the hijacking?


oh you're so dark and edgy!

05 Dec 2012 06:36 PM
Hector Remarkable     
This is exactly like when the Devil stole the real baby Jesus 2012 years ago. That happened, right?

05 Dec 2012 06:37 PM
ordinarysteve     
No newsflash subby? I don't think you realize how big of a deal this is!
/thisisanoutrage.jpg

05 Dec 2012 06:38 PM
FirstDennis     
Imagine, for a moment, that someone vandalized or stole items from a A) Muslim religious display; or a B) Jewish religious display; or a C) Hindu religious display; or a D) Bhuddist religious display; or a E) Kwanza religious display, etc. etc.

I'm just sayin'.

05 Dec 2012 06:38 PM
mekki     

occamswrist: Since this holiday was originally a pagan celebration of the birth of the sun goddess Mirtha during the winter solstice, didn't Christianity do the hijacking?


Just as much as death metal hijacked from Delta blues.

05 Dec 2012 06:38 PM
intotheabyss81     
If only he had a father in some position of power to help him out.

05 Dec 2012 06:38 PM
Pincy     

FirstDennis: Imagine, for a moment, that someone vandalized or stole items from a A) Muslim religious display; or a B) Jewish religious display; or a C) Hindu religious display; or a D) Bhuddist religious display; or a E) Kwanza religious display, etc. etc.

I'm just sayin'.


OK, I imagined all of these. Do I win a prize?

05 Dec 2012 06:39 PM
FatherChaos     
indiegamerchick.files.wordpress.comView Full Size

05 Dec 2012 06:40 PM
nmemkha     
Anyone check the local Temple?

05 Dec 2012 06:40 PM
uncleacid     
They should question the Wiseman's.

05 Dec 2012 06:40 PM
meat0918     
Why do people feel the need to vandalize things on private or public property?

Although I'd have my money on some bored teen or college student than any other group.

05 Dec 2012 06:41 PM
BronyMedic     
Germany, 1933 - JEWS DID THIS TO YOU!
Soviet Union, 1934 - INTELLECTUALS DID THIS TO YOU!
China, 1964 - EDUCATED MEN DID THIS TO YOU!
America, 2012 - ATHEISTS DID THIS TO YOU!

pbs.twimg.comView Full Size

05 Dec 2012 06:44 PM
mekki     

FirstDennis: Imagine, for a moment, that someone vandalized or stole items from a A) Muslim religious display; or a B) Jewish religious display; or a C) Hindu religious display; or a D) Bhuddist religious display; or a E) Kwanza religious display, etc. etc.

I'm just sayin'.


/CSB time/
Reminds me of something that happened in my hometown back when I was teenager. There was a family who had a lit up Menorah in the window. I believe they were the only Jewish family in the entire neighborhood. One day, someone threw a rock at their window and stole the Menorah. The poor family was distraught. The neighborhood responded by buying the family a new Menorah and putting Menorahs in their own windows right along with the Christmas tree, as if daring the little thief to try his luck again. He didn't.
/End of CSB time/

05 Dec 2012 06:44 PM
Day_Old_Dutchie     
I lived in a neighborhood where you never put out any holiday decorations one could reach without a ladder. Wasn't just nativity scenes - light bulbs, Santas, tinsel, wreaths, what have you would get swiped and smashed in the street. There were lots of teens there with nothing else to do.

The kids knew the local cops were more interested in manning speed traps and roadblocks than serving their community by just patrolling the streets so the brats they did what they wanted.

We moved away after a couple of years, but since all the kids in that neighborhood are grown up now, those elaborate displays are safe again.

05 Dec 2012 06:45 PM
phrawgh     
t0.gstatic.comView Full Size

05 Dec 2012 06:49 PM
Ow! That was my feelings!     

FirstDennis: Imagine, for a moment, that someone vandalized or stole items from a A) Muslim religious display; or a B) Jewish religious display; or a C) Hindu religious display; or a D) Bhuddist religious display; or a E) Kwanza religious display, etc. etc.

I'm just sayin'.


I imagine the Christian did it, what do I win?

05 Dec 2012 06:50 PM
Nick Nostril     
About time. Too many people enjoying their commercial holiday.

05 Dec 2012 06:52 PM
meat0918     

Ow! That was my feelings!: FirstDennis: Imagine, for a moment, that someone vandalized or stole items from a A) Muslim religious display; or a B) Jewish religious display; or a C) Hindu religious display; or a D) Bhuddist religious display; or a E) Kwanza religious display, etc. etc.

I'm just sayin'.

I imagine the Christian did it, what do I win?


Hell, I imagine a Christian stole this baby Jesus, just by virtue of the sheer number of them in this country.

05 Dec 2012 06:52 PM
Lord Snoopy's G.P.E.H.     
This looks like a job for Fenwick.

05 Dec 2012 06:53 PM
Gyrfalcon    [TotalFark]  

mekki: FirstDennis: Imagine, for a moment, that someone vandalized or stole items from a A) Muslim religious display; or a B) Jewish religious display; or a C) Hindu religious display; or a D) Bhuddist religious display; or a E) Kwanza religious display, etc. etc.

I'm just sayin'.

/CSB time/
Reminds me of something that happened in my hometown back when I was teenager. There was a family who had a lit up Menorah in the window. I believe they were the only Jewish family in the entire neighborhood. One day, someone threw a rock at their window and stole the Menorah. The poor family was distraught. The neighborhood responded by buying the family a new Menorah and putting Menorahs in their own windows right along with the Christmas tree, as if daring the little thief to try his luck again. He didn't.
/End of CSB time/


That is a very csb. Also very Xmasy.

05 Dec 2012 06:55 PM
d23    [TotalFark]  
Not a part of the war on christmas.

Part of the ongoing and never ending U.S. war on sanity.

05 Dec 2012 06:56 PM
hackhix     

Mega Steve: moulderx1: Whose turn was it to watch the kid?

[ionenewsone.files.wordpress.com image 350x414]

 

www.lolbrary.comView Full Size

05 Dec 2012 06:56 PM
Balrog     

Lord Snoopy's G.P.E.H.: This looks like a job for Fenwick.


i197.photobucket.comView Full Size


My work is done...

05 Dec 2012 06:56 PM
lilistonic     
Clearly one of you pedants did it because he got the Nativity all wrong. From the comments:

"Maybe it's a traditionalist who thinks the Baby Jesus isn't supposed to be placed in the creche until Midnight, Christmas, when tradition (not fact, you didacts) says He was born. Most "Christians" don't even know the 12 days of Christmas begin Christmas Day and last until Epiphany, yet after decorating starting Halloween, they rip down their decorations before New Year missing some of the great party days: Boxing, Fest of St Stephen, Circumcision of Our Lord (we serve cold-cuts, btw), and Twelfth Night. We still haven't celebrated St Nicholas' Day or St Lucy's Day yet. C'mon, folks: if your going to celebrate it, at least learn about it."

05 Dec 2012 06:58 PM
occamswrist     

MBrady: occamswrist: Since this holiday was originally a pagan celebration of the birth of the sun goddess Mirtha during the winter solstice, didn't Christianity do the hijacking?

So you'll be at your desk on December 25th as a normal work day, and not expect any "holiday" pay, since to you it's just a pagan celebration of the sun goddess Mirtha?

Good for you!


I honestly don't know what point you're trying to make or what you are accusing me of being.

If my employer wants to give me a day off of work and pay me, it'll take a bigger issue than this to make me say no.

05 Dec 2012 06:58 PM
Gyrfalcon    [TotalFark]  

MBrady: moulderx1: Whose turn was it to watch the kid?

They must not have been true Christians, because everyone knows - well, except the college kids living in mommy's basement - that since Jesus doesn't arrive until December 25th, you don't put baby Jesus out in the manger.


Where do you put him then? In a box?

05 Dec 2012 07:01 PM
Grimlock2099     
They should do an "Amalie" and send the church pictures of the baby Jesus in different places all over the world. Half tempted to send them a new one with a note saying "Merry Christmas from an atheist, we are mostly good people"

05 Dec 2012 07:01 PM
red5ish     
Who left the cake out in the rain?

05 Dec 2012 07:01 PM
Huntceet     
The jesus isn't supposed to be put on display until the 25th.

05 Dec 2012 07:03 PM
Bit'O'Gristle     
Would have been more amusing if they had replaced him with a lawn Gnome in a diaper.

/just saying

05 Dec 2012 07:04 PM
fusillade762     
"It's a 2000-year-old story and it's still true today."

Sorry buddy, it wasn't true then.

05 Dec 2012 07:05 PM
Ow! That was my feelings!     

Gyrfalcon: MBrady: moulderx1: Whose turn was it to watch the kid?

They must not have been true Christians, because everyone knows - well, except the college kids living in mommy's basement - that since Jesus doesn't arrive until December 25th, you don't put baby Jesus out in the manger.

Where do you put him then? In a box?


Seems obvious.
1.bp.blogspot.comView Full Size

05 Dec 2012 07:07 PM
Rreal     
Io Saturnalia!

05 Dec 2012 07:10 PM
occamswrist     

KrispyKritter: occamswrist: Since this holiday was originally a pagan celebration of the birth of the sun goddess Mirtha during the winter solstice, didn't Christianity do the hijacking?

oh you're so dark and edgy!


Seriously you need to update your bio. It sounds like a kid hacked it and wrote all that to embarrass you.

05 Dec 2012 07:10 PM
phrawgh     

Bit'O'Gristle: Would have been more amusing if they had replaced him with a lawn Gnome in a diaper.

/just saying


Or a troll!

/He was/is the ultimate troll, after all.

05 Dec 2012 07:12 PM
signaljammer     
Cold cuts!? Everyone knows the proper nosh for the Feast of the Circumcision is Tortellini!

05 Dec 2012 07:12 PM
mekki     

Grimlock2099: They should do an "Amalie" and send the church pictures of the baby Jesus in different places all over the world. Half tempted to send them a new one with a note saying "Merry Christmas from an atheist, we are mostly good people"


Nah. The funniest would be to take a picture of him in The Church of the Nativity in Bethlehem with a note saying, "Felt homesick. Will return soon. -XOXO"

05 Dec 2012 07:13 PM
the ha ha guy     

Huntceet: The jesus isn't supposed to be put on display until the 25th.


In that case, shouldn't the shepherds be omitted as well, since they didn't arrive until after the birth of Jesus?

05 Dec 2012 07:15 PM
Corvus     
What kidnapping is part of the season!!

reelybored.comView Full Size

05 Dec 2012 07:15 PM
Pockafrusta     
Should have lectrified baby Jesus... and put cameras on him. Win/Win

05 Dec 2012 07:19 PM
JesusJuice     

Corvus: What kidnapping is part of the season!!

[reelybored.com image 475x245]


Put the Krampus back in Christmas!

05 Dec 2012 07:19 PM
Fano     
I gave the thief a wooden pickle

05 Dec 2012 07:23 PM
umad     

Fark Rye For Many Whores: /really
//who else would do that?


I would.

/but only from government property.
//leave private property alone
///that is where we want them to do this shiat if they feel the need to

05 Dec 2012 07:24 PM
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