(full site)
Fark.com

Back To Main
   Supermarket's "free black widow with every bunch of grapes" promotion doesn't go over too well

06 Dec 2012 01:16 AM   |   3755 clicks   |   Connecticut Post
Showing 1-50 of 57 comments
Refresh Page 2
View Comments:
Apos     
Spider thread! Spider thread!
Just in time to elicit dread!
Here's one thing you should know:
Don't you EVER cross a black widow!
Look out......Here comes the spider thrrrrrread!

i230.photobucket.comView Full Size

06 Dec 2012 12:42 AM
Mixolydian Master     
farm7.staticflickr.comView Full Size


Help yourself! They're delicious!

06 Dec 2012 01:20 AM
Notabunny    [TotalFark]  

06 Dec 2012 01:21 AM
almandot     
www.aceshowbiz.comView Full Size


I'll take two.

06 Dec 2012 01:21 AM
TV's Vinnie    [TotalFark]  
Why was I not surprised that this happened at a Whole Foods?

06 Dec 2012 01:22 AM
davidphogan     
fark armageddon, this is hell.

06 Dec 2012 01:23 AM
Smackledorfer     
Produce is not scary, and icky stuff from nature finding its way into produce isn't either.

06 Dec 2012 01:23 AM
Pincy     
They let it go in the backyard???

06 Dec 2012 01:23 AM
davidphogan     
Link

Linkered. 

/now here i go

06 Dec 2012 01:24 AM
Apos     
media.tumblr.comView Full Size
 

/Oblig

06 Dec 2012 01:26 AM
What_Would_Jimi_Do     
1.bp.blogspot.comView Full Size

06 Dec 2012 01:31 AM
ArcadianRefugee     

Pincy: They let it go in the backyard???


Seriously. I keep mine in the bathroom.

farm9.staticflickr.comView Full Size

06 Dec 2012 01:36 AM
maltedmothball     
www.abload.deView Full Size


/so happy

06 Dec 2012 01:36 AM
Ann Coulter's Diiick     
Used to work in the produce section at Kroger about 10 years back. Was pulling grapes off the stems to put them into pre-packaged containers and noticed something on my fingernail. Saw it move slightly and immediately flung my hand to flick it off. A little grey widow landed on the table. Thankfully the prep room is effing cold and the thing was barely moving, but freaked me the fark out for a while.

06 Dec 2012 01:39 AM
GreenSun     
As for the spider, Weiss said her boyfreind, James Boncek, released it in her yard.

"My boyfriend let it go outside,'' Weiss said. "That's how we live. It's a living animal and we have no hard feelings.''



Tomorrow's Story: Neighbor Bit by Freed Black Widow, Dies

06 Dec 2012 01:45 AM
Harry_Seldon     
I suppose that is not as bad as those deadly hitchhiking banana spiders.

06 Dec 2012 01:45 AM
Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom     
Maybe pesticides aren't such a bad idea after all.

But don't tell that to a Black Rock woman who insisted Tuesday that she'll stick with organic produce -- even after finding a potentially deadly black widow spider in a bag of imported organic grapes she bought at Whole Foods in Fairfield.

" I would never knowingly put poison into my system," said yoga instructor Nora Weiss, 27, about the pesticides non-organic farmers use to kill spiders and insects. "I'd definitely risk coming face to face with a spider than that.''


Organic food doesn't work that way, you retarded biatch.

06 Dec 2012 01:46 AM
Cup Check    [TotalFark]  

GreenSun: As for the spider, Weiss said her boyfreind, James Boncek, released it in her yard.

"My boyfriend let it go outside,'' Weiss said. "That's how we live. It's a living animal and we have no hard feelings.''



Tomorrow's Story: Neighbor Bit by Freed Black Widow, Dies


Came here to say this, even though it'd be more amusing if one of them ended up the victim.

Might even qualify for a Darwin Award.

06 Dec 2012 01:50 AM
Hector Remarkable     
Isn't she lovely?...And so deadly. Her kiss is fifteen times as poisonous as that of the rattlesnake.
You see, her venom is highly neurotoxic, which is to say that it attacks the central nervous system, causing intense pain, profuse sweating, difficulty in breathing, loss of consciousness, violent convulsions and, finally...Death.

You know, what I think I love most about her is her inborn need to dominate; possess. In fact, immediately after the consummation of her marriage to the smaller and weaker male of the species she kills and eats him. Oh, she is delicious.
And I hope he was.

Such power and dignity....unhampered by sentiment.

If I may put forward a slice of personal philosophy, I feel that man has ruled this world as a stumbling demented child-king long enough! And as his empire crumbles, my precious Black Widow shall rise as his most fitting successor!

06 Dec 2012 01:52 AM
fotoeve     
Let's hope it freezes to death before it finds a nice, warm basement to breed in....and then have it babies sold at a yard sale or given to a second-hand store wrapped up in rugs, clothing, etc.

What a dumb ass!

06 Dec 2012 01:55 AM
Begoggle     
Oh, it's this article again.
I guess the "utility company sent me a bill for $1 billion" article is due in a couple days.

06 Dec 2012 02:03 AM
hvilaichez     
I can't help but think that he stomped the spider into oblivion when she wasn't looking.

06 Dec 2012 02:04 AM
Bonanza Jellybean     
I've found black windows in my grapes on two occasions, and I have a friend who worked produce for a few years and found them routinely. I usually just send them to the Cornell Cooperative Extension and claim I found them in my backyard.

06 Dec 2012 02:16 AM
davidphogan     
cdn.ksk.uproxx.comView Full Size


/hot

06 Dec 2012 02:17 AM
my herniated disc     
meh. my friend found a lizard in our grapes. now its our pet

i had a black widow living on top of the fridge for awhile. we had an agreement.

06 Dec 2012 02:18 AM
Jedekai     
Grapevines = black widows spiders.

Seriously, it's their natural habitat.

06 Dec 2012 02:18 AM
Gyrfalcon    [TotalFark]  
Any spider that comes inside deserves to die.

I killed three this weekend when I rearranged the furniture.

The big monsters that lived outside in the trees were welcome to stay till it froze & they all died, but black widows that hitch a ride on grapes must suffer the penalties.

06 Dec 2012 02:28 AM
Ryker's Peninsula     
I'm not saying it isn't a big deal, but it damn well isn't a FOUR exclamation points worth of a big deal.
Two would be excessive.

06 Dec 2012 02:33 AM
strutin     
My wife works at Safeway (Canada), the Produce guy found a live black widow in the bananas he was pulling out of boxes to stock.. They caught it in a deli container, called the local reptile refuge and they gave them a number of a spidery guy to come pick it up.... no big deal I guess..

/ I would've Siaht my pants most probably..

//dnrtfa.

06 Dec 2012 02:42 AM
Duck_of_Doom     

fotoeve: Let's hope it freezes to death before it finds a nice, warm basement to breed in....and then have it babies sold at a yard sale or given to a second-hand store wrapped up in rugs, clothing, etc.

What a dumb ass!


It's been in the 40s, 30s overnight, but it will get warmer this week. Is that cold enough to kill it, or slow it down until the rains Saturday get it?

06 Dec 2012 02:49 AM
Great Porn Dragon     

ArcadianRefugee: Pincy: They let it go in the backyard???

Seriously. I keep mine in the bathroom.

[farm9.staticflickr.com image 640x396]


But does she reside near the toilet seat? :D

06 Dec 2012 03:05 AM
illannoyin     

06 Dec 2012 03:29 AM
Bob The Nob     
Good prices, no Black Widows ... that's the Fairsley Difference!

06 Dec 2012 03:30 AM
Tarquinn     

Hector Remarkable: Isn't she lovely?...And so deadly. Her kiss is fifteen times as poisonous as that of the rattlesnake.
You see, her venom is highly neurotoxic, which is to say that it attacks the central nervous system, causing intense pain, profuse sweating, difficulty in breathing, loss of consciousness, violent convulsions and, finally...Death.

You know, what I think I love most about her is her inborn need to dominate; possess. In fact, immediately after the consummation of her marriage to the smaller and weaker male of the species she kills and eats him. Oh, she is delicious.
And I hope he was.

Such power and dignity....unhampered by sentiment.

If I may put forward a slice of personal philosophy, I feel that man has ruled this world as a stumbling demented child-king long enough! And as his empire crumbles, my precious Black Widow shall rise as his most fitting successor!


These words he speaks types are true!

06 Dec 2012 03:33 AM
Buffet     
"Insects are indigenous to organic produce..." (spider?......insect??..REALLY???)
"My boyfriend let it go outside..."
"I will always eat organic..."

Your honor, I submit exhibits A, B, and C as evidence of some stupid MotherFarkers!

06 Dec 2012 03:36 AM
fotoeve     
I live in So. California and I have a garage full of Black Widows. An amazingly hardy and difficult to get rid of species, once they are able to set up shop they are very hard to get rid of....Since it never freezes where I live, but has dropped down into the upper 40s, I shudder at this introduction of a non-native species to some warm basements in Conn.

You can spot their webs as they tend to look like a disorganized tangled clump, and they lay their eggs in a small round pellet (slightly larger than a pea) off to one side. If you disturb that nest in any way, she'll come roaring out to defend it.

I always wear gloves in the garden and garage and tuck my pants into my socks so they can't climb up my legs. I usually end up killing about 20 of them per hour whenever am clearing stuff out or moving things around in the garage and patio area. I've had bug bombed the garage on numerous occasions, had a professional come out to spray, done purposeful "search and destroy" methods but I usually see at least one per week.

The worst experience was one that was in my car! How the hell it got in there with the windows rolled up, I don't know, but I recognized that web, poked at it and we had a heated battle on the 5 freeway during rush hour. I won!

06 Dec 2012 04:22 AM
sexorcisst     
Not to be confused with the free spider with every clock.

06 Dec 2012 04:29 AM
Gyrfalcon    [TotalFark]  

fotoeve: I live in So. California and I have a garage full of Black Widows. An amazingly hardy and difficult to get rid of species, once they are able to set up shop they are very hard to get rid of....Since it never freezes where I live, but has dropped down into the upper 40s, I shudder at this introduction of a non-native species to some warm basements in Conn.

You can spot their webs as they tend to look like a disorganized tangled clump, and they lay their eggs in a small round pellet (slightly larger than a pea) off to one side. If you disturb that nest in any way, she'll come roaring out to defend it.

I always wear gloves in the garden and garage and tuck my pants into my socks so they can't climb up my legs. I usually end up killing about 20 of them per hour whenever am clearing stuff out or moving things around in the garage and patio area. I've had bug bombed the garage on numerous occasions, had a professional come out to spray, done purposeful "search and destroy" methods but I usually see at least one per week.

The worst experience was one that was in my car! How the hell it got in there with the windows rolled up, I don't know, but I recognized that web, poked at it and we had a heated battle on the 5 freeway during rush hour. I won!


Ah, that was your multi-car pileup.

06 Dec 2012 04:33 AM
fotoeve     
No multi-car pile up. It's Los Angeles area, so rush hour traffic crawls along at 10 mph. We leave multi-car pile-ups to the the professionals in Texas.

06 Dec 2012 04:44 AM
fotoeve     

fotoeve: I live in So. California and I have a garage full of Black Widows. An amazingly hardy and difficult to get rid of species, once they are able to set up shop they are very hard to get rid of....Since it never freezes where I live, but has dropped down into the upper 40s, I shudder at this introduction of a non-native species to some warm basements in Conn.

You can spot their webs as they tend to look like a disorganized tangled clump, and they lay their eggs in a small round pellet (slightly larger than a pea) off to one side. If you disturb that nest in any way, she'll come roaring out to defend it.

I always wear gloves in the garden and garage and tuck my pants into my socks so they can't climb up my legs. I usually end up killing about 20 of them per hour whenever am clearing stuff out or moving things around in the garage and patio area. I've had bug bombed the garage on numerous occasions, had a professional come out to spray, done purposeful "search and destroy" methods but I usually see at least one per week.

The worst experience was one that was in my car! How the hell it got in there with the windows rolled up, I don't know, but I recognized that web, poked at it and we had a heated battle on the 5 freeway during rush hour. I won!


Gyrfalcon: fotoeve: I live in So. California and I have a garage full of Black Widows. An amazingly hardy and difficult to get rid of species, once they are able to set up shop they are very hard to get rid of....Since it never freezes where I live, but has dropped down into the upper 40s, I shudder at this introduction of a non-native species to some warm basements in Conn.

You can spot their webs as they tend to look like a disorganized tangled clump, and they lay their eggs in a small round pellet (slightly larger than a pea) off to one side. If you disturb that nest in any way, she'll come roaring out to defend it.

I always wear gloves in the garden and garage and tuck my pants into my socks so they can't climb up my legs. I usually end up killing about 20 of them per hour whenever am clearing stuff out or moving things around in the garage and patio area. I've had bug bombed the garage on numerous occasions, had a professional come out to spray, done purposeful "search and destroy" methods but I usually see at least one per week.

The worst experience was one that was in my car! How the hell it got in there with the windows rolled up, I don't know, but I recognized that web, poked at it and we had a heated battle on the 5 freeway during rush hour. I won!

Ah, that was your multi-car pileup.


No multi-car pile up. It's Los Angeles area, so rush hour traffic crawls along at 10 mph. We leave multi-car pile-ups to the the professionals in Texas.

06 Dec 2012 04:48 AM
fredbox     
I used to work as a produce clerk, so I used to really get a kick out of these replies. Yep, all kinds of exotically poisonous insects make it in. I mean its not every day, but maybe one a week.

When I was working on the night crew, I was waxing the floor one night, and a large (imported) cockroach crawled out of the dog food rack to the area I was waxing. Whereupon it promptly did three backflips, wriggled its legs and died. Considering radiation won't kill the farkers, I stopped for a minute to consider what were in the wax fumes. So, the asthma issues now present aren't much of a surprise.

They gassed the warehouse with pesticides once a week, but you still got some through every once in awhile. So, Not News.

06 Dec 2012 05:12 AM
Spaced Cowboy     
I have an irrational fear that one of those demon spawned banana spiders will crawl out when I pick up a bunch at the store.

I once watched a show about harvesting bananas and one of those monsters crawled out of the huge bundle the guy was carrying and onto his back. I've never looked at bananas quite the same.

06 Dec 2012 05:12 AM
fredbox     
Oh, also, always wash your produce. And the tops of your soda / beer cans.

06 Dec 2012 05:14 AM
LordOfThePings     
Some spiders hunt humans. You'll never be safe.

www.picvalley.netView Full Size

06 Dec 2012 05:36 AM
Hawnkee     
assets.diylol.comView Full Size

06 Dec 2012 06:51 AM
vegasj     
Although black widow spiders are common in the southern and western United States, they are not often found in Connecticut.

"My boyfriend let it go outside,'' Weiss said. "That's how we live. It's a living animal and we have no hard feelings.''



well, they are now thanks to these 2 farktards.


06 Dec 2012 07:03 AM
Jon iz teh kewl     
"i don't cut grass i smoke it".

it works on so many levels.

its one of those jokes that just makes u LAUGH and LAUGH and LAUGH

geez what were these people ON when they made that joke??? give me some of that shiat!!!!

06 Dec 2012 07:37 AM
Coffee Snob     
I know this girl's boyfriend James. If she is anything like him, she is a pretentious, self involved douchebag.

06 Dec 2012 08:15 AM
painless42     
It's all what you're used to I guess. Living in Central California I can go into the yard/shed/garage in the summer and grab you 5 widows in as many minutes. They're everywhere. Thankfully they're passive and don't really like moving outside their web. Theyre not really the "move the box something runs out after you" type spider.Also being jet black is handy for spotting.

OTOH house centipedes.... Scare the frickin crap out of me.

/too fast

//TOO MANY LEGS!!!

///never seen one in Cali. Minnesota OTOH...

06 Dec 2012 09:49 AM
Speaker2Animals     
"Attention all Fairfield Whole Foods Customers!!!! I just found a black widow spider in my Sunview Organic Table Grapes bag!!!!

Have we found a soulmate for Frankie MacDonald?

06 Dec 2012 10:31 AM
Showing 1-50 of 57 comments
Refresh Page 2
View Comments:
This thread is closed to new comments.


Back To Main

More Headlines:
Main | Sports | Business | Geek | Entertainment | Politics | Video | FarkUs | Contests | Fark Party | Combined