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   Beginning on January 12, Florida's python permit holders and the general public are invited to compete to see who can harvest the longest and the most Burmese pythons. What could possibly go wrong?

06 Dec 2012 03:30 PM   |   3730 clicks   |   WTSP
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AirForceVet    [TotalFark]  
Kill 'em. Kill 'em all.

06 Dec 2012 10:03 AM
exick    [TotalFark]  
The most Burmese? That seems a little racist.

06 Dec 2012 10:13 AM
Marcus Aurelius     
You can only use pistols and machetes, so the collateral damage should be fairly limited.

06 Dec 2012 10:55 AM
trivial use of my dark powers     
AAAHHHHHHH!!!!!! AAAAAAAHHHHHH! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

also: AAAAAAAGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!

06 Dec 2012 12:03 PM
give me doughnuts     
Is there a cook-out after? Python is good eating.

06 Dec 2012 12:10 PM
Walker    [TotalFark]  
BRB, going to pyhtons.com and ordering 100 pythons so I will win.

06 Dec 2012 12:42 PM
Snarcoleptic_Hoosier    [TotalFark]  
Hunting a reptile
Using a gun
Probably stupid
Potentially tragic
Amazingly fun
Bhurma Snake

06 Dec 2012 12:44 PM
Diogenes    [TotalFark]  
We really need to reduce their population numbers. A Burma Shave, if you will.

06 Dec 2012 01:08 PM
jbuist     

Marcus Aurelius: You can only use pistols and machetes, so the collateral damage should be fairly limited.


That seems kind of stupid. I'd figure a shotgun loaded up with #8 would be good snake medicine.

06 Dec 2012 01:56 PM
shanrick    [TotalFark]  
Yknow, my python boot is too tight
I couldnt get it off last night
A week went by, an now it's july
I finally got it off
An my girl-friend cry
You got stink foot! stink foot, darlin

06 Dec 2012 02:24 PM
The_Sponge    [TotalFark]  
What a python permit holder in Florida might look like:

i294.photobucket.comView Full Size

06 Dec 2012 02:50 PM
TheHighlandHowler    [TotalFark]  

06 Dec 2012 03:15 PM
Smelly Pirate Hooker     
I was more intrigued by the mugshot roundup below, featuring a woman wearing a shirt that says: For a good time, insert coin.

Classy.

06 Dec 2012 03:36 PM
illannoyin     
simpsonswiki.netView Full Size


Educate yourself

06 Dec 2012 03:36 PM
megarian    [TotalFark]  
... needs booze and bikinis.

06 Dec 2012 03:37 PM
aremmes     
The competition is fierce.

static.tvfanatic.comView Full Size

06 Dec 2012 03:38 PM
BarkingUnicorn     

Marcus Aurelius: You can only use pistols and machetes, so the collateral damage should be fairly limited.


Untrue. The euthanasia guide mentions pistols and machetes as examples, but there's no restriction on how you can kill. The guide merely says it's important to destroy the brain quickly and completely to minimize suffering.

06 Dec 2012 03:38 PM
TXEric     

shanrick: Yknow, my python boot is too tight
I couldnt get it off last night
A week went by, an now it's july
I finally got it off
An my girl-friend cry
You got stink foot! stink foot, darlin


Could you rinse it off, do you suppose?

06 Dec 2012 03:38 PM
probesport     
TOO BEAUCOUP!!

06 Dec 2012 03:38 PM
DoctorHowardDoctorFine     
Too bad the pythons can't have their own competition to bring in the most Floridiots..

06 Dec 2012 03:39 PM
BarkingUnicorn     

Diogenes: We really need to reduce their population numbers. A Burma Shave, if you will.


99% of their prey is already gone, so I don't think we need to do anything.

06 Dec 2012 03:40 PM
Elegy     
Good.

06 Dec 2012 03:41 PM
Nothing To See Here     
You know, there is a Hotel there.

06 Dec 2012 03:41 PM
wildcardjack     

TheHighlandHowler: Cobra effect


A limited contest will not spawn a cobra effect.

06 Dec 2012 03:41 PM
BarkingUnicorn     

give me doughnuts: Is there a cook-out after? Python is good eating.


That will probably be next. Texas rattlesnake roundups feature cook-outs.

06 Dec 2012 03:42 PM
Keizer_Ghidorah     
You've got to get them before they get you.

img69.imageshack.usView Full Size


www.moneyandshit.comView Full Size


/goes to get snuggly in my pet Burmese's coils

06 Dec 2012 03:44 PM
eagles95     
1.bp.blogspot.comView Full Size




I think he may win



www.threedonia.comView Full Size




This assclown will cheat though

06 Dec 2012 03:44 PM
Current Resident    [TotalFark]  
i1214.photobucket.comView Full Size

06 Dec 2012 03:44 PM
MythDragon     

The_Sponge: What a python permit holder in Florida might look like:

[i294.photobucket.com image 200x225]


Damn you and your 24 inch pythons, brother.
*tiny fist*

06 Dec 2012 03:45 PM
MythDragon     
www.hotflick.netView Full Size

"You mean der is snakes out der dis big?"

06 Dec 2012 03:47 PM
mbillips     
Odds of a python hurting a hunter are probably lower than a hunter shooting/stabbing himself.

/Shy creatures who mainly eat things much smaller than people

06 Dec 2012 03:48 PM
MythDragon     
24hourhiphop.comView Full Size

People will have trouble trapping his anaconda, because it don't want none unless you got buns, hun.

/and I am done.

06 Dec 2012 03:49 PM
CheekyMonkey     

DoctorHowardDoctorFine: Too bad the pythons can't have their own competition to bring in the most Floridiots..


Who's to say they can't?

\my money's on the pythons...

06 Dec 2012 03:51 PM
mikalmd     
This is going to make some great headlines ...More fark reading material for the next few months...

06 Dec 2012 03:54 PM
Keys dude     
Pythons are making their way even down here to the Keys now -- they're pretty damn good swimmers. One's been spotted as far south as Marathon (halfway between Key Largo and Key West).

06 Dec 2012 03:54 PM
OldManDownDRoad     
akamaicovers.oreilly.comView Full Size

06 Dec 2012 03:55 PM
dodecahedron     

give me doughnuts: Is there a cook-out after? Python is good eating.


I read there is too much mercury and other heavy metals in the meat. It is unfortunate because I also heard they were pretty darn good and I live close enough to have benefited.

06 Dec 2012 03:56 PM
dittybopper    [TotalFark]  

DoctorHowardDoctorFine: Too bad the pythons can't have their own competition to bring in the most Floridiots..


Why? Don't you like the fauna in the Everglades?

06 Dec 2012 03:57 PM
dodecahedron     

06 Dec 2012 03:59 PM
Artisan Sandwich     

Smelly Pirate Hooker: I was more intrigued by the mugshot roundup below, featuring a woman wearing a shirt that says: For a good time, insert coin.

Classy.


Says "Smelly Pirate Hooker" to himself

06 Dec 2012 03:59 PM
Happy Hours     
And while they're out hunting the Department of Wildlife should break into their homes and kill all their snakes since they obviously aren't responsible enough to keep them from escaping into the wild.

06 Dec 2012 03:59 PM
Sun Khan    [TotalFark]  

Keys dude: Pythons are making their way even down here to the Keys now -- they're pretty damn good swimmers. One's been spotted as far south as Marathon (halfway between Key Largo and Key West).


Still won't be able to compete with pure Alabama blacksnake.

06 Dec 2012 04:07 PM
iheartscotch    [TotalFark]  
I don't know; I'd probably look in the adjoining shrubbery.

/ a shrubbery?!

06 Dec 2012 04:08 PM
schrepjm     

Happy Hours: And while they're out hunting the Department of Wildlife should break into their homes and kill all their snakes since they obviously aren't responsible enough to keep them from escaping into the wild.


A python permit in Florida isn't a piece of paper allowing someone to possess pythons.

06 Dec 2012 04:11 PM
quietwalker     
I'm sad that they're a top predatory invasive species, because when it comes to humans they're one of the more gentle, tolerant species of snakes. They're all cuddly because they like to be warm, and they know people are too big to eat - usually.

Besides, they're cute: my burmese modeled by my cousin.

06 Dec 2012 04:12 PM
StrikitRich    [TotalFark]  

probesport: TOO BEAUCOUP!!


No, no....that's the Alabama Black Snake.

06 Dec 2012 04:14 PM
SwiftFox     
Rain

06 Dec 2012 04:15 PM
KarmaSpork     
It's the African Rock pythons that are mixed in with 'em that you have to look out for. Heck of a lot more aggressive, and from what I hear, they may be able to breed. They pull 'em out of swimming pools and crap in S. Fla.

/Scream like a girl around snakes
//Of course, I am a girl
///whatever

06 Dec 2012 04:17 PM
superfudge73     
This is wrong, just plain WRONG! Pythons are living creatures and we are trying to get people to kill them. Hasn't the environment suffered enough without us going in and making yet another of Gods creatures extinct! Soon pythons will go the way of the carrier pigeon and the do do bird. Pythons are important to the ecosystem because.......oh fark it.

06 Dec 2012 04:18 PM
MakerGrey     

schrepjm: A python permit in Florida isn't a piece of paper allowing someone to possess pythons.


Do tell.

06 Dec 2012 04:23 PM
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