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   $50 for a crappy cup of coffee

07 Dec 2012 04:02 PM   |   7538 clicks   |   AP
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SirTanon     
thisiswhyitsucks.comView Full Size


"It's a bit nutty"

07 Dec 2012 04:05 PM
moops     
You can put lipstick on the elephant's ass to verify if contact is being made.

07 Dec 2012 04:05 PM
Jument     
Anyone who pays a ridiculous premium for anything out of an animals ass needs to be smacked in the face.

07 Dec 2012 04:06 PM
Prof. Frink     
This is news?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kopi_Lu wak

07 Dec 2012 04:07 PM
FatherChaos     
hosted.ap.orgView Full Size


Yeah, that's right. Sift through my shiat. Yeah, you love it.

07 Dec 2012 04:07 PM
signaljammer     
Elephants have a fairly high BMR and excrete rather low-entropy poop.

07 Dec 2012 04:07 PM
skinink    [TotalFark]  
Jeebus, has Starbucks raised their prices again?

07 Dec 2012 04:09 PM
eltejon     
FTA: ,,,the cuppa, which is called Black Ivory Coffee.


Let that sink in awhile...


/contrived?

07 Dec 2012 04:09 PM
pottie     
I'd drink it, but then, I've been known to do a lot of stupid things.

07 Dec 2012 04:09 PM
TofuTheAlmighty     
I'd drink it. Pay for it, no, but drink, yes.

Kopi luwak is pretty tasty. Didn't pay for it either the couple times I had some.

07 Dec 2012 04:11 PM
lemurtx    [TotalFark]  
I think I'll stick with the cat crap coffee.

/bought it, haven't tried it yet

07 Dec 2012 04:12 PM
CoffeeMug     
Agreed, Kopi Luwak is damn good, but not better enough than regular coffee to ever be worth paying for.

07 Dec 2012 04:13 PM
DECMATH     

eltejon: /contrived?


No doubt. TFA interviewed the guy who spent $300k "developing" the product. Some of that certainly went for branding / marketing!

07 Dec 2012 04:14 PM
LonMead     
www.marvunapp.comView Full Size

media.comicvine.comView Full Size

07 Dec 2012 04:17 PM
Surool     
Fun Fact: The "best" durian is said to have passed through an elephant's digestive system this way.

07 Dec 2012 04:19 PM
The Evil That Lies In The Hearts Of Men     
More proof that people will buy anything if you put it in nice wrapping and stick a high enough price tag on it.

07 Dec 2012 04:20 PM
BlackMtnMan     
You can eat Chit, or you can drink chit......up to you.

07 Dec 2012 04:22 PM
Oznog     
It's like the goose that shiats the golden turd.

07 Dec 2012 04:26 PM
KrispyKritter     
the only thing better than being the first to drink poo coffee is getting others to pay princely sums to do the same.

07 Dec 2012 04:27 PM
quietwalker     
If you're going to pay 50$ for coffee, I've heard that Black Blood of the Earth was worth it. According to the creator, it ~tastes~ like coffee ~smells~.

Apparently tastes sweet, but has ~40x the caffeine of coffee, and you drink it by the shot, unless you like being very nervous and jittery.

07 Dec 2012 04:27 PM
cyberspacedout     
I wonder if anyone's ever thought of stewing a bunch of raw coffee beans with the equivalent of whatever might affect its flavor in the animal's digestive tract. It should be possible to get similar results without so much expense, labor, or risk of disease from sifting through animal crap.

07 Dec 2012 04:28 PM
Raw_fishFood     
Nope. Nothing that exists first as an animal's dung. Never, no matter how many people clamor for it.

07 Dec 2012 04:29 PM
bim1154     
If you are going to drink shiatty coffee, may I suggest this?

abe-research.illinois.eduView Full Size

07 Dec 2012 04:32 PM
CaffietineFiend     
So 2 girls 1 cup is coming out on DVD then?

07 Dec 2012 04:36 PM
Saberus Terras     
What's the facination with coffee made from crap? I've heard of civet cat, weasel, and now elephant...

Do we really have that many people who want to consume feces?

07 Dec 2012 04:36 PM
The Irresponsible Captain    [TotalFark]  
Dang hipsters.

I need to open a coffee shop just to make a fortune feeding animals raw beans and selling the crapped out ones.

07 Dec 2012 04:36 PM
LazarusLong42     

quietwalker: If you're going to pay 50$ for coffee, I've heard that Black Blood of the Earth was worth it. According to the creator, it ~tastes~ like coffee ~smells~.

Apparently tastes sweet, but has ~40x the caffeine of coffee, and you drink it by the shot, unless you like being very nervous and jittery.


Any drink named after a spell cast by a WOW boss just seems unlikely to be good, though probably better than coffee that's passed through an elephant's intestines.

07 Dec 2012 04:37 PM
Ow My Balls     
i471.photobucket.comView Full Size


R.I.P. CRAPPIE

07 Dec 2012 04:38 PM
Sarsin     

cyberspacedout: I wonder if anyone's ever thought of stewing a bunch of raw coffee beans with the equivalent of whatever might affect its flavor in the animal's digestive tract. It should be possible to get similar results without so much expense, labor, or risk of disease from sifting through animal crap.


I don't think it's about that.

It's about being rich enough to say "Oh you drink Starbucks? MY coffee is harvested by 100s of poor women, who then feed it to elephants. Then, MORE poor people sift through the elephants CRAP just to get me this coffee."

07 Dec 2012 04:38 PM
justanotherfarkinfarker     
You could probably develop a chemical process to do about the same thing for a fraction of the cost and no shiat sifting.

07 Dec 2012 04:43 PM
topcon     
Sorry, but I like my women the way I like my coffee: Covered in civet shiat.

07 Dec 2012 04:43 PM
Jon iz teh kewl     
it's for people with lots of money that don't want to buy cocaine. "hey look i'm spending a lot of money on stimulants. but i'm DRUG FREE!"

07 Dec 2012 04:52 PM
arenaninja     

Sarsin: cyberspacedout: I wonder if anyone's ever thought of stewing a bunch of raw coffee beans with the equivalent of whatever might affect its flavor in the animal's digestive tract. It should be possible to get similar results without so much expense, labor, or risk of disease from sifting through animal crap.

I don't think it's about that.

It's about being rich enough to say "Oh you drink Starbucks? MY coffee is harvested by 100s of poor women, who then feed it to elephants. Then, MORE poor people sift through the elephants CRAP just to get me this coffee."


I got the impression from the article that they get a fair share of the earnings. Maybe that's just me.

07 Dec 2012 04:56 PM
Hoboclown     
goteaminternet.comView Full Size


Up next, it's called a "cupakeeno"... and wait till you hear what it costs!

07 Dec 2012 04:57 PM
HindiDiscoMonster     

SirTanon: [thisiswhyitsucks.com image 506x217]

"It's a bit nutty"


Over in 1 
gifs.gifbin.comView Full Size

07 Dec 2012 04:57 PM
The Southern Dandy     
Poop coffee really is yummy. The acid from the gut removes all the bitterness. I wouldn't pay $50 a cup though.

07 Dec 2012 05:15 PM
uncleacid     
Once you drink it you will never forget it.

07 Dec 2012 05:15 PM
mc_hfcs     
Skipped to the end, without even clicking on the article or reading the comments, to say: Yes, we've all heard of Kopi Luwak by now.

Is that what this was about? Did I "guess" right?

07 Dec 2012 05:20 PM
cryinoutloud    [TotalFark]  

bim1154: If you are going to drink shiatty coffee, may I suggest this?
[abe-research.illinois.edu image 278x305]


Hey hey hey. That's my regular brand.

Civets, the little critters that make poop coffee, are being abused by being held in tiny cages by the hundreds and farmed for their coffee poop. But don't worry about it--as long as your farking coffee isn't bitter.

07 Dec 2012 05:30 PM
a_room_with_a_moose     

The Southern Dandy: Poop coffee really is yummy. The acid from the gut removes all the bitterness. I wouldn't pay $50 a cup though.


Crushed clean eggshells in your filter will do the same thing.

07 Dec 2012 05:30 PM
Gilligann     
I bet it would taste the same coming out of a persons ass.

Hey! That's a great business idea. You can charge different depending on the nationality and the age of the ass it came out of.

07 Dec 2012 05:33 PM
Dadoody     
I enjoy the bitterness in coffee.

Its the acidity of bad coffees that I don't like.

07 Dec 2012 05:35 PM
fyrewede     

mc_hfcs: Skipped to the end, without even clicking on the article or reading the comments, to say: Yes, we've all heard of Kopi Luwak by now.

Is that what this was about? Did I "guess" right?


Close - Dumbo dung this time around...

07 Dec 2012 05:37 PM
Jon iz teh kewl     
so what happens if a poop turd slips out along with the coffee beans which i assume they're swallowing whole and not crunching up?

such a process makes me want to squirm

07 Dec 2012 05:43 PM
The Southern Dandy     

Dadoody: I enjoy the bitterness in coffee.


COMMIE!

07 Dec 2012 05:45 PM
Jon iz teh kewl     
i mean seriously there literally HAS to be a way to simulate this with CHEMICALS as opposed to NATURAL ORGANIC PROCESS of ASS POOPING

07 Dec 2012 05:50 PM
Quantum Apostrophe     

Jument: Anyone who pays a ridiculous premium for anything out of an animals ass needs to be smacked in the face.


upload.wikimedia.orgView Full Size

07 Dec 2012 06:42 PM
Quantum Apostrophe     

Jon iz teh kewl: i mean seriously there literally HAS to be a way to simulate this with CHEMICALS as opposed to NATURAL ORGANIC PROCESS of ASS POOPING


Or a 3D printer. It's the future bonanza.

07 Dec 2012 07:09 PM
Jon iz teh kewl     

Quantum Apostrophe: Jon iz teh kewl: i mean seriously there literally HAS to be a way to simulate this with CHEMICALS as opposed to NATURAL ORGANIC PROCESS of ASS POOPING

Or a 3D printer. It's the future bonanza.


poop turds look a lot like coffee beans..

07 Dec 2012 07:11 PM
laid back w/bud light     
I'm currently shopping around my own brand of ass corn chowder. Basically I sit around eating corn all day and mine the kernels from my toilet and make chowder out of it. You'd be surprised how much sweeter and savory the finished product is. I'm hoping to go on Shark Tank and get Mark Cuban to back my endeavor.

07 Dec 2012 07:20 PM
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