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   Old and busted: push up bras. New hotness: control sleeves

09 Dec 2012 09:18 AM   |   20430 clicks   |   Guardian
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special20    [TotalFark]  
bingo wings...

09 Dec 2012 09:20 AM
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Oldiron_79     
Dear womens, you will not turn into she hulk if you so much as look at a weight. Weight training is the best way to not have saggy arms

09 Dec 2012 09:21 AM
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starsrift     

Oldiron_79: Dear womens, you will not turn into she hulk if you so much as look at a weight. Weight training is the best way to not have saggy arms


But that could involve sweating!
/ Sorry, perspiring
// glowing?

09 Dec 2012 09:23 AM
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HighlanderRPI     
Your biceps hang like wizard's sleeve

09 Dec 2012 09:24 AM
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jonohull     
static.guim.co.uk

Bingo wings.

09 Dec 2012 09:25 AM
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TheOther     
Arms flapping like a pillow case in the breeze is not your best look, ladies.

09 Dec 2012 09:27 AM
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RoyHobbs22     
Dear Women's: I have a shake weight for you, if you catch my drift, and I thinks you does . . .

09 Dec 2012 09:28 AM
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Nick Nostril     
Not triceps, more like quadceps or maybe even quintcepts.

09 Dec 2012 09:28 AM
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jtown     
Of course Madonna has bingo wings. She's like 75. It'd be weird if she had toned upper arms.

09 Dec 2012 09:28 AM
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megarian    [TotalFark]  

Oldiron_79: Dear womens, you will not turn into she hulk if you so much as look at a weight. Weight training is the best way to not have saggy arms


Madonna does a crap-ton of weight lifting.

And apparently she's the one with the Bingo Wings.

Some people will have those kind of arms no matter what they do.

I don't think she has Bingo Wings. But she may have transformed into a man in the past decade... So there's that.

09 Dec 2012 09:29 AM
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Longtooth     

starsrift: Oldiron_79: Dear womens, you will not turn into she hulk if you so much as look at a weight. Weight training is the best way to not have saggy arms

But that could involve sweating!
/ Sorry, perspiring
// glowing?


glistening

09 Dec 2012 09:29 AM
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megarian    [TotalFark]  
Also, Bingo Wings.

09 Dec 2012 09:30 AM
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Zarquon's Flat Tire     

Longtooth: starsrift: Oldiron_79: Dear womens, you will not turn into she hulk if you so much as look at a weight. Weight training is the best way to not have saggy arms

But that could involve sweating!
/ Sorry, perspiring
// glowing?

glistening


Glistening like a pig.

09 Dec 2012 09:34 AM
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sgnilward    [TotalFark]  

09 Dec 2012 09:34 AM
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Spiralmonkey    [TotalFark]  
This is not new. These all-over-lycra t-shirts have been sold in my local supermarket for ages. They look like thermal underwear and come in white, black and a scary "skin tone" that looks like nothing in nature.

We all age (if we're lucky enough to live that long) and we all will get wrinkles, saggy bits, and assorted weirdnesses. We need to stop letting marketing companies tell us this is wrong or some sort of illness.

09 Dec 2012 09:37 AM
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BigRightRear     

sgnilward: Relevant


Anti-camel toe? That's just wrong.

09 Dec 2012 09:38 AM
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sgnilward    [TotalFark]  

BigRightRear: sgnilward: Relevant

Anti-camel toe? That's just wrong.


Do you want the "Bingo Wings" down there too?

09 Dec 2012 09:39 AM
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hbk72777     
Even skinny women look bad in sleeveless if their arms aren't toned. Very few woman can get away with looking good showing off the guns.

09 Dec 2012 09:42 AM
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abhorrent1     
i184.photobucket.com

/scuba suit
//may be obscure for the whippersnappers

09 Dec 2012 09:43 AM
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Egalitarian     
what the hell are bingo wings?
also, I have seen obese women with huge curtains hanging off their upper arms. In some cultures that's considered sexy. Madonna would be considered pathetic.

09 Dec 2012 09:43 AM
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LuckyBastid     
Bajingo wings.

09 Dec 2012 09:46 AM
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bearded clamorer    [TotalFark]  
i.dailymail.co.uk

09 Dec 2012 09:46 AM
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mbillips     

Egalitarian: what the hell are bingo wings?
also, I have seen obese women with huge curtains hanging off their upper arms. In some cultures that's considered sexy. Madonna would be considered pathetic.


Name one culture where that's sexy.

09 Dec 2012 09:47 AM
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abhorrent1     

mbillips: Name one culture where that's sexy.


Rule 36, man.

09 Dec 2012 09:49 AM
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quickdraw     
Wings would be freaking awesome. We should all aim to get the biggest flap there that we can. Maybe, over time, we can evolve with gliders.

09 Dec 2012 09:49 AM
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special20    [TotalFark]  

mbillips: Egalitarian: what the hell are bingo wings?
also, I have seen obese women with huge curtains hanging off their upper arms. In some cultures that's considered sexy. Madonna would be considered pathetic.

Name one culture where that's sexy.


...turkey?

09 Dec 2012 09:49 AM
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TheOther     
Spiralmonkey: We all age (if we're lucky enough to live that long) and we all will get wrinkles, saggy bits, and assorted weirdnesses. We need to stop letting marketing companies tell us this is wrong or some sort of illness.

We all poop, too. That doesn't mean random strangers on the street should have to witness it.

09 Dec 2012 09:50 AM
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theToadMan     

special20: bingo wings...


thank-you and the intertubes for teaching me one thing I need to learn each day. Now I have to use it in a conversation at some point today.

09 Dec 2012 09:52 AM
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gerbilpox     

sgnilward: Relevant


[snort]

Where's the guys' version?

"Dear Prudence, I want to feel safe and secure knowing I'm not 'that guy' everyone is laughing at behind my back. What can I wear that will hide my package's bulge?"

Oh wait, someone actually asked that: "Girls in my class get grossed out"

Reply posts:

[baggier pants, briefs vs. boxers, etc.]

"Try not to get erect in the first place. To hide it, place something in front of the bulge. Women are repulsed by the penis."

09 Dec 2012 09:56 AM
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St_Francis_P     
Those aren't bingo wings, they're just large-boned.

09 Dec 2012 09:58 AM
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CheetahOlivetti    [TotalFark]  
Those are my victory flags.

09 Dec 2012 10:00 AM
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Schroedinger's Glory Hole     
The farmer's wife has saggy arms and they flap when she plays BINGO
B-I-N-G-O

09 Dec 2012 10:02 AM
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Wodan11     
+1 for the headline subby

09 Dec 2012 10:03 AM
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Rich Cream     
I'm sure this is as flattering as shoving a bunch of cottage cheese into a sausage casing.

09 Dec 2012 10:06 AM
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farkeruk     
"Arms are the latest insecurity to be sold back to us"

Stop farking buying it, then. Grow up.

You know what cracks me up about feminists? On the one hand, they like to tell everyone that women are just as smart as men, on the other hand, that they are easily manipulated by marketing people.

For me, I like women to be who they are. No fake tits, no push up bras, no clearly obvious attempts to hide age with spanx. If you're using body shaping underwear to make yourself look thinner, your fatness still shows in your face.

09 Dec 2012 10:09 AM
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Spiralmonkey    [TotalFark]  

TheOther: Spiralmonkey: We all age (if we're lucky enough to live that long) and we all will get wrinkles, saggy bits, and assorted weirdnesses. We need to stop letting marketing companies tell us this is wrong or some sort of illness.

We all poop, too. That doesn't mean random strangers on the street should have to witness it.


If you have a problem with how someone else looks that's your problem. Don't expect other people to dress to suit you. If you really are about to have a fit of the vapours when confronted with someone who isn't a perfect Abercrombie & Fitch model then I suggest you looks away. Better still, stay home and avoid all danger.

09 Dec 2012 10:13 AM
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snocone    [TotalFark]  
don't let the sound of your own Bingo Wings drive you crazier

09 Dec 2012 10:14 AM
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Baz the Spaz     

bearded clamorer: [i.dailymail.co.uk image 634x410]


Came for pictures of women in push-up bras.
Leaving traumatized.

09 Dec 2012 10:21 AM
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utah dude     
i use PTFD for that.

/put
//the
///fork
////down, u fat biatch.

09 Dec 2012 10:27 AM
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St_Francis_P     

farkeruk: "Arms are the latest insecurity to be sold back to us"

Stop farking buying it, then. Grow up.

You know what cracks me up about feminists? On the one hand, they like to tell everyone that women are just as smart as men, on the other hand, that they are easily manipulated by marketing people.

For me, I like women to be who they are. No fake tits, no push up bras, no clearly obvious attempts to hide age with spanx. If you're using body shaping underwear to make yourself look thinner, your fatness still shows in your face.


Feminists? BTW, if you read the whole thing, she agrees with you:

Arms are the latest insecurity to be sold back to us, and having seen this one evolve, I feel we have some chance of fighting it. Let's decide not to buy control sleeves. Let's leave this one. I want my arms back. I want my body to just be me.

09 Dec 2012 10:28 AM
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Bedstead Polisher     

farkeruk: You know what cracks me up about feminists? On the one hand, they like to tell everyone that women are just as smart as men, on the other hand, that they are easily manipulated by marketing people.


Biologically speaking, it's a woman's job to be attractive to attract a mate. It's ingrained in the female psyche to preen and be as attractive as possible. Marketers are aware of this and play on those insecurities. They do the same for men, but for other things. Women are constantly being bombarded with these messages about how to fix "problem areas" whatever they may be. Sure, some aren't as vain as others and don't buy into that crap, but even the most intelligent fall prey to those insecurities.

Men fall for that stuff too when it comes to cars or technology. Why did so many people rush out to get an iPhone 5 on the first day it was released? Were their phones broken and they needed it immediately? No. Why do so many men NEED a certain car when most cars are adequate to get them around?

Feminism is about equality of the sexes. Both are equally prone to silly insecurities and desires, it's human nature.

09 Dec 2012 10:33 AM
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Gramma     

utah dude: i use PTFD for that.

/put
//the
///fork
////down, u fat biatch.


Bingo wings aren;t caused by being fat. They are caused by old droopy skin.

09 Dec 2012 10:39 AM
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Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener     
Buffalo Wild Wings?

09 Dec 2012 10:40 AM
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No Such Agency     

mbillips: Egalitarian: what the hell are bingo wings?
also, I have seen obese women with huge curtains hanging off their upper arms. In some cultures that's considered sexy. Madonna would be considered pathetic.

Name one culture where that's sexy.


Mauritania.

09 Dec 2012 10:42 AM
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JuicePats    [TotalFark]  
Where are the push-up bra pics?

I'd post some but I'm on my phone.

09 Dec 2012 10:48 AM
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BunkyBrewman    [TotalFark]  

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: Buffalo Wild Wings?


You're a liter now? *pffft*

Run along while we talk about you on TFD.

09 Dec 2012 10:52 AM
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cryinoutloud     

Oldiron_79: Dear womens, you will not turn into she hulk if you so much as look at a weight. Weight training is the best way to not have saggy arms


Bullshiat. Did you notice the article has a picture of Madonna, the woman who has arms that are so muscled, everyone makes fun of her for them? I've worked out with hand weights for years. I shovel snow for a living, FFS. And past a certain age--you get them. It's called "getting older."

I've never been fat either, so don't try that next. Pretty sure Madonna never has been either, since we have the photographic evidence.

09 Dec 2012 10:54 AM
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Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener     
:-/

09 Dec 2012 10:55 AM
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Pick     
Came here looking for push up bra pics, leaving disappointed.

09 Dec 2012 10:58 AM
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BunkyBrewman    [TotalFark]  

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: :-/


Dammit. I'm going to get some mileage on that thread before you get a free month.

09 Dec 2012 10:59 AM
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