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   Gentlemen, the situation is dire: our employees are forced to go to food banks to make ends meet. Therefore, I propose, we open our own food bank

11 Dec 2012 09:15 PM   |   16175 clicks   |   Pittsburgh City Paper
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gopher321    [TotalFark]  
That's completely pathetic. Who the fark runs that company, Ebenezar Scrooge?

11 Dec 2012 05:14 PM
Ambivalence    [TotalFark]  
16 tons and what do you get
Another day older and deeper in debt
Saint peter don't ou call me 'cause I can't go
I owe my soul to the company store.

11 Dec 2012 05:23 PM
MaudlinMutantMollusk    [TotalFark]  
Hey! Here's another great idea!

/Have the company open a store where employees can buy necessities like food and clothing on credit. Then the payments could just be taken directly out of their paychecks
//what could possibly go wrong?

11 Dec 2012 05:24 PM
Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener     
"I turned my head and started to cry because I was so angry, although she thought I was crying because of the gesture. They just don't get that I'd rather they pay me a better wage so I wouldn't have to go to a food bank."

Damn, just... damn.

11 Dec 2012 05:24 PM
MaudlinMutantMollusk    [TotalFark]  

Ambivalence: 16 tons and what do you get
Another day older and deeper in debt
Saint peter don't ou call me 'cause I can't go
I owe my soul to the company store.


Damn my slow fingers

11 Dec 2012 05:24 PM
cameroncrazy1984    [TotalFark]  
These are the people you conservatives really want to run our healthcare sys...oh wait, they sound exactly like the kind of people Republicans love.

11 Dec 2012 05:25 PM
Gordian Cipher    [TotalFark]  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: Hey! Here's another great idea!

/Have the company open a store where employees can buy necessities like food and clothing on credit. Then the payments could just be taken directly out of their paychecks
//what could possibly go wrong?


Heh, my company lets you link your paycheck with your ID badge, so you can just swipe your badge in the cafeteria and have the money taken out of your paycheck. I'm sure it's all legal (Fortune 500 company and all), but it seems awful close to Hooverville.

/I don't do that
//I'd rather put it on the credit card that earns me points

11 Dec 2012 05:27 PM
jehovahs witness protection     
Yeah? Well, just try making a seed deposit at the food bank, then come back in a few months expecting to make a withdrawal.

11 Dec 2012 05:53 PM
Bontesla     
Omfg.

11 Dec 2012 05:55 PM
nekom    [TotalFark]  
Are there no prisons? What of the work camps?

11 Dec 2012 05:57 PM
djkutch    [TotalFark]  
I don't understand why employees shouldn't just be forced to live and work at the job. A little room with a hotplate, if you will. Share a shiater down the hall.

11 Dec 2012 06:01 PM
doglover    [TotalFark]  
Next step, female employees will become street walkers. Male employees will be coke mules. Children of employees will be chimney sweeps.

11 Dec 2012 06:05 PM
SarahDiddle     
i1.kym-cdn.comView Full Size


/what the fark is wrong with this company?

11 Dec 2012 06:07 PM
BKITU    [TotalFark]  

jehovahs witness protection: Yeah? Well, just try making a seed deposit at the food bank, then come back in a few months expecting to make a withdrawal.


I tried that, but at a sperm bank. They kicked me out and told me to never come again.

11 Dec 2012 06:14 PM
cman     

SarahDiddle: [i1.kym-cdn.com image 500x282]

/what the fark is wrong with this company?


Its not a company

It is a non-profit university

11 Dec 2012 06:17 PM
cman     

cman: SarahDiddle: [i1.kym-cdn.com image 500x282]

/what the fark is wrong with this company?

Its not a company

It is a non-profit university medical center


Whoops, my bad. Fixt

11 Dec 2012 06:18 PM
GAT_00     
That sounds about right. Don't pay your workers enough? Why not open a food bank so other people can buy them food that you won't pay them enough for.

This is exactly what you get with capitalism.

11 Dec 2012 06:18 PM
ThatGuyFromTheInternet     
Oh good! Now your colleagues can actually see you hit up the food bank at work. How dignifying.

11 Dec 2012 06:18 PM
TheBeastOfYuccaFlats    [TotalFark]  

Gordian Cipher: Heh, my company lets you link your paycheck with your ID badge, so you can just swipe your badge in the cafeteria and have the money taken out of your paycheck. I'm sure it's all legal (Fortune 500 company and all), but it seems awful close to Hooverville.


Well, so long as the prices for the food aren't wildly out of line with the market price on the high side, whatever.

Gordian Cipher: /I don't do that
//I'd rather put it on the credit card that earns me points


Well, yeah.

11 Dec 2012 06:19 PM
bunner     
upload.wikimedia.orgView Full Size


Here. Now stop complaining and go trade your pay for ramen, soap and tampons.

11 Dec 2012 06:20 PM
Snarfangel    [TotalFark]  
I keep depositing all sorts of delicious food at the local food bank, but when I want to make a withdrawal for a surprise dinner party, suddenly I'm the bad guy.

11 Dec 2012 06:23 PM
Nadie_AZ     

SarahDiddle: [i1.kym-cdn.com image 500x282]

/what the fark is wrong with this company?


You've got poor and middle class people supporting these things because they are temporarily embarrassed millionaires.

11 Dec 2012 06:41 PM
Nadie_AZ     
For example, it's unclear if UPMC is directly contributing to the food bank - but they are certainly asking other employees to donate

Just .. wow.

11 Dec 2012 06:45 PM
fusillade762    [TotalFark]  

Nadie_AZ: SarahDiddle: [i1.kym-cdn.com image 500x282]

/what the fark is wrong with this company?

You've got poor and middle class people supporting these things because they are temporarily embarrassed millionaires.

 

i46.tinypic.comView Full Size

11 Dec 2012 06:51 PM
jaylectricity    [TotalFark]  
It's like the old days, right? When a corporation opened a "town" and provided its employees with vouchers to buy food from the company grocery store, right?

11 Dec 2012 06:53 PM
Krymson Tyde     
i44.photobucket.comView Full Size

11 Dec 2012 06:59 PM
bunner     
"We're a non-profit and we're poor. This cheap and demeaning gesture is all we could do."

"What about that fat f*ck in the Rolls that runs the place, how does he get paid?"

"Oh, well, you see, the structure for management c..."

"No, what about that fat f*ck in the Rolls Royce who runs the place, how does he get paid?"

"Those who direct the managerial ..."

"NO! WHAT ABOUT THAT FAT F*CK IN THE ROLLS ROYCE WHO RUNS THE PLACE? HOW DOES HE GET PAID?"

"SECURITY! TERRORIST ALERT!"

11 Dec 2012 07:08 PM
Mentat    [TotalFark]  
It's the thought that counts.

11 Dec 2012 07:10 PM
bunner     

Mentat: It's the thought that counts.


"We think you should all eat well and live in nice houses and have cars that run good and look pretty and here's a free can of peas." Like that?

11 Dec 2012 07:13 PM
fusillade762    [TotalFark]  

Mentat: It's the thought that counts.


If only you could eat thoughts.

11 Dec 2012 07:16 PM
Lsherm    [TotalFark]  
This reminds me of a complaint one of my coworkers had this year: someone on a conference call spent an hour making fun of everyone else on the call because he thought he had muted his phone. Even worse, since he had the volume for the call turned down, every time they stopped the meeting to ask him to stop being an ass he didn't realize they were talking to him.

Many complaints were sent up the chain and his boss sent out a very apologetic email promising that next time he would make sure he was actually on mute.

11 Dec 2012 07:29 PM
Angry Drunk Bureaucrat    [TotalFark]  
UPMC is the biggest employer in the region, is one of the largest landowners, and is largely tax exempt. They threatened to cut off service to all Blue Cross customers if BC/BS bought one of the local smaller hospital systems.

They're kinda dicks.

11 Dec 2012 07:31 PM
Mentat    [TotalFark]  

bunner: Mentat: It's the thought that counts.

"We think you should all eat well and live in nice houses and have cars that run good and look pretty and here's a free can of peas." Like that?


God bless America.

11 Dec 2012 07:31 PM
L.D. Ablo    [TotalFark]  
Let's just bring back indentured servitude.

Sell yourself to a corporation for seven years to get out of your student loans.

11 Dec 2012 08:20 PM
sno man    [TotalFark]  

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: "I turned my head and started to cry because I was so angry, although she thought I was crying because of the gesture. They just don't get that I'd rather they pay me a better wage so I wouldn't have to go to a food bank."

Damn, just... damn.


That was the quote I was going to post and what you said was close enough to my FFS that I have to give you props for getting here first...

11 Dec 2012 08:36 PM
Holocaust Agnostic     

cameroncrazy1984: These are the people you conservatives really want to run our healthcare sys...oh wait, they sound exactly like the kind of people Republicans love.


theres are the kind of people democrats legally mandated that you put in charge of your healthcare.

11 Dec 2012 09:17 PM
skullkrusher     

cameroncrazy1984: These are the people you conservatives really want to run our healthcare sys...oh wait, they sound exactly like the kind of people Republicans love.


nonprofits?

11 Dec 2012 09:19 PM
Uzzah     

Holocaust Agnostic: theres are the kind of people democrats legally mandated that you put in charge of your healthcare.


I know. I was so much better off when I didn't have any healthcare at all.

11 Dec 2012 09:22 PM
iheartscotch     
This is what is going to happen to companies forced to provide health care for those who work over 30 hours; no one is going to work over 30 hours and they are going to have to provide their own insurance or they will be penalized.

/ and I thought I was evil

11 Dec 2012 09:25 PM
TV's Vinnie    [TotalFark]  
Bosses love to see their employees struggling and groveling.

11 Dec 2012 09:25 PM
CanuckAmok     
...and Merry Christmas!!!

images2.wikia.nocookie.netView Full Size

11 Dec 2012 09:27 PM
Silly Jesus     
You should pay me more than I'm worth! I don't understand economics / capitalism / life! Whargarbll.

11 Dec 2012 09:27 PM
skullkrusher     

Silly Jesus: You should pay me more than I'm worth! I don't understand economics / capitalism / life! Whargarbll.


You're truly insatiable!

11 Dec 2012 09:29 PM
Fart_Machine     
content8.flixster.comView Full Size


Hey! If any of you are looking for any last-minute gift ideas for me, I have one. I'd like Frank Shirley, my boss, right here tonight. I want him brought from his happy holiday slumber over there on Melody Lane with all the other rich people and I want him brought right here, with a big ribbon on his head, and I want to look him straight in the eye and I want to tell him what a cheap, lying, no-good, rotten, four-flushing, low-life, snake-licking, dirt-eating, inbred, overstuffed, ignorant, blood-sucking, dog-kissing, brainless, dickless, hopeless, heartless, fat-ass, bug-eyed, stiff-legged, spotty-lipped, worm-headed sack of monkey shait he is!

11 Dec 2012 09:29 PM
Silly Jesus     

skullkrusher: Silly Jesus: You should pay me more than I'm worth! I don't understand economics / capitalism / life! Whargarbll.

You're truly insatiable!


That's what she said.

11 Dec 2012 09:30 PM
TofuTheAlmighty     
Socialize the costs, privatize the profits. That's the American way.

11 Dec 2012 09:32 PM
lelio     
This is the reason unions form, because the management are douche canoes. Looking at the link to the union gripes they mention that UPMC put up a site with the awesome spelling www.upmccares.com. Alas that website says "The page you are attempting to reach is not available outside the UPMC network."

Here's where the person in the above story complains about UPMC tax exempt status and there's this juicy bit in there:

"The controller's report found that the current total value of all tax-exempt property in the county was $17 billion"


WTF how you get $17B in property in one county?

When was the last time UPMC was audited? They say that they are giving away a lot of free health care, but who knows.

Labor's one of (if not the) biggest cost in healthcare. There's no magic fairy dust that's somehow going to sprinkle more money down for the workers without raising the hospital's costs somehow. And no amount of government intervention is going to change that.

11 Dec 2012 09:32 PM
Goetz     

Silly Jesus: You should pay me more than I'm worth! I don't understand economics / capitalism / life! Whargarbll.


You suck at this.

11 Dec 2012 09:32 PM
utah dude     
a small raise and a bulk food purchasing co'op for the employees would've met both goals.

11 Dec 2012 09:33 PM
FunkOut    [TotalFark]  

Goetz: Silly Jesus: You should pay me more than I'm worth! I don't understand economics / capitalism / life! Whargarbll.

You suck at this.


He's 12 and on drugs. It's a shame, really.

11 Dec 2012 09:33 PM
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