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   Clerk accidentally sells winning Megabucks ticket, wasn't even supposed to be there that day

22 Dec 2012 07:24 PM   |   12981 clicks   |   WMUR New Hampshire
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calbert    [TotalFark]  
c438342.r42.cf2.rackcdn.com

/obscure?

22 Dec 2012 06:43 PM
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OregonVet    [TotalFark]  

calbert: [c438342.r42.cf2.rackcdn.com image 400x300]

/obscure?


Nope. Try not to suck any dicks on the way to the parking lot.

22 Dec 2012 07:07 PM
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Nothing To See Here     
Strange things are afoot at the Circle K.

22 Dec 2012 07:25 PM
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buntz     
Hillsborough?? Bunch of savages in that town!

22 Dec 2012 07:29 PM
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drjekel_mrhyde     

Nothing To See Here: Strange things are afoot at the Circle K.


What about the Kum and Go?

22 Dec 2012 07:30 PM
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Bob The Nob     
Also bought hubcaps for a '79 Pinto and a copy of Mini Trucker magazine.

22 Dec 2012 07:30 PM
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thisisyourbrainonFark     
"Hey kid, you seen a set of keys?"
"No time for love, Dr. Jones."

22 Dec 2012 07:30 PM
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Bob The Nob     
Dammit ... '72 Pinto hatchback. :(

22 Dec 2012 07:33 PM
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ChubbyTiger     
Oh, and Happy Scrappy Hero Pup.

22 Dec 2012 07:33 PM
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puffy999     
Buy the clerk a car, or give him/her the equivalent price (and pay any applicable taxes for said clerk). You can afford it.

F*ck everyone else, you can't afford them. But if this mistake was responsible for your ticket, I think that would be an acceptable token of gratitude.

22 Dec 2012 07:35 PM
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hockeychick     

OregonVet: calbert: [c438342.r42.cf2.rackcdn.com image 400x300]

/obscure?

Nope. Try not to suck any dicks on the way to the parking lot.


Hey you, get back here...

22 Dec 2012 07:35 PM
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thisisyourbrainonFark     
static.moviefanatic.com

CAITLIN BREE: You might be let down. I'm not a hermaphrodite.
RANDAL GRAVES: Hey, few are.

22 Dec 2012 07:36 PM
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illannoyin     
collider.com

Didn't he work at all american burger?

22 Dec 2012 07:37 PM
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stickandmove     
Salsa shark!

22 Dec 2012 07:50 PM
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TheManofPA     
Had that happen at Christmas once. I got a 6 dollar winner so I went down to exchange it for 3 2 dollar tickets since it was a gift, fun to play the win for life. The guy gave me 6 1-dollar tickets of 3 different kinds. He was a nice older guy so I just left and drove home (was visiting family across the state). Hit the 2k top prize on one of them that night, only time I've ever had luck since lotto is a fun fool's game.

22 Dec 2012 07:51 PM
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Raptop     

calbert: [c438342.r42.cf2.rackcdn.com image 400x300]

/obscure?


Do you think the average storm trooper knows how to install a toilet main?

22 Dec 2012 07:52 PM
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DerPups     
"Cute cat, what's its name?"
"Annoying Customer"

22 Dec 2012 07:54 PM
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skwerl     
Sad, silly website thinks I'm going to click on a second page to read the last two lines of such a lame and brief article.

22 Dec 2012 07:54 PM
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piercer310     

buntz: Hillsborough?? Bunch of savages in that town!


That's what I said.

22 Dec 2012 08:02 PM
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Nem Wan     
Bennetts chose the one-time cash option of $1.3 million, which comes to a little under $1 million after taxes

Only a 25% tax hit? I thought taxes on such a windfall were generally half. What happened? Republicans?

22 Dec 2012 08:02 PM
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Real Women Drink Akvavit    [TotalFark]  

TheManofPA: Had that happen at Christmas once. I got a 6 dollar winner so I went down to exchange it for 3 2 dollar tickets since it was a gift, fun to play the win for life. The guy gave me 6 1-dollar tickets of 3 different kinds. He was a nice older guy so I just left and drove home (was visiting family across the state). Hit the 2k top prize on one of them that night, only time I've ever had luck since lotto is a fun fool's game.


That is awesome, dude. I rarely play any lotto, because I never win. I occasionally go to the Indian casino or  Reno, where I have  better luck and can at  least afford  lunch if I learn when to quit. I usually do know when to quit, too.

22 Dec 2012 08:03 PM
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NeoCortex42     

Nem Wan: Bennetts chose the one-time cash option of $1.3 million, which comes to a little under $1 million after taxes

Only a 25% tax hit? I thought taxes on such a windfall were generally half. What happened? Republicans?


25% is withheld in the initial check. The winner is still responsible for taxes beyond that. Since the tax burden can change quite a bit depending on how creative their accountant is, the media only reports the value of the initial check.

22 Dec 2012 08:10 PM
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RandomExcess     
he bought 2 tickets? 2? in a row?

22 Dec 2012 08:12 PM
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Seasons I'v Withered     
Is there any way to SUE myself .... er something?

22 Dec 2012 08:16 PM
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BolloxReader    [TotalFark]  
Just watched Clerks again today. That movie was Dilbert for the nonprofessional service industry.

22 Dec 2012 08:18 PM
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Rye_     
Clerks is an awful, awful movie. Just terrible.

22 Dec 2012 08:21 PM
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BadAttitude4U     

Rye_: Clerks is an awful, awful movie. Just terrible.


Yeah? Rye_, you're a rude motherfarker, you know that? But you're cute as hell. I could go down on you, suck you, line up three other guys, make like a circus seal.

22 Dec 2012 08:38 PM
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Rye_     

BadAttitude4U: Rye_: Clerks is an awful, awful movie. Just terrible.

Yeah? Rye_, you're a rude motherfarker, you know that? But you're cute as hell. I could go down on you, suck you, line up three other guys, make like a circus seal.


Yeah. Like that.

22 Dec 2012 08:40 PM
Reply
Mutt Farkinov     

Rye_: BadAttitude4U: Rye_: Clerks is an awful, awful movie. Just terrible.

Yeah? Rye_, you're a rude motherfarker, you know that? But you're cute as hell. I could go down on you, suck you, line up three other guys, make like a circus seal.

Yeah. Like that.


Hey, you're not allowed to rent here anymore!

22 Dec 2012 08:47 PM
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EricTheHalfABee    [TotalFark]  
What's that smell?

22 Dec 2012 08:48 PM
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Nothing To See Here     
Sounds like someone or two belong in the Entertainment or Politics link . . .

/but i'm still chuckling

22 Dec 2012 08:49 PM
Reply
StreetlightInTheGhetto     

Rye_: BadAttitude4U: Rye_: Clerks is an awful, awful movie. Just terrible.

Yeah? Rye_, you're a rude motherfarker, you know that? But you're cute as hell. I could go down on you, suck you, line up three other guys, make like a circus seal.

Yeah. Like that.


what you want, Grizzly Adams?

22 Dec 2012 08:57 PM
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Mixolydian Master     

calbert: [c438342.r42.cf2.rackcdn.com image 400x300]

/obscure?


25.media.tumblr.com

obscure?

22 Dec 2012 08:58 PM
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thisisyourbrainonFark     

Mixolydian Master: calbert: [c438342.r42.cf2.rackcdn.com image 400x300]

/obscure?

[25.media.tumblr.com image 420x294]

obscure?


Did he say making f#ck?

22 Dec 2012 09:14 PM
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SteakMan    [TotalFark]  

TheManofPA: Had that happen at Christmas once. I got a 6 dollar winner so I went down to exchange it for 3 2 dollar tickets since it was a gift, fun to play the win for life. The guy gave me 6 1-dollar tickets of 3 different kinds. He was a nice older guy so I just left and drove home (was visiting family across the state). Hit the 2k top prize on one of them that night, only time I've ever had luck since lotto is a fun fool's game.


I always buy the mistakes when the clerks make them (maybe 5 times)
/still haven't won anything :)

22 Dec 2012 09:19 PM
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Mixolydian Master     

thisisyourbrainonFark: Mixolydian Master: calbert: [c438342.r42.cf2.rackcdn.com image 400x300]

/obscure?

[25.media.tumblr.com image 420x294]

obscure?

Did he say making f#ck?


img252.imageshack.us

22 Dec 2012 09:43 PM
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JasonOfOrillia    [TotalFark]  

calbert: [c438342.r42.cf2.rackcdn.com image 400x300]

/obscure?


Well, since the headline was a reference to Clerks I would have to so "No, not obscure."

22 Dec 2012 09:46 PM
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sore_bluto     
I need one each of the following tapes: Whisper in the Wind, To Each His Own, Put it Where It Doesn't Belong, My Pipes Need Cleaning, All Tit-farking, Volume Eight, I Need Your Cock, Ass-Worshipping Rim- Jobbers, My coont and Eight Shafts, Cum Clean, Cum-Gargling Naked Sluts, Cum Buns Three, Cumming in a Sock, Cum on Eileen, Huge Black Cocks with Pearly White Cum, Slam It Up My Too-Loose Ass, Ass Blasters in Outer Space, Blowjobs by Betsy, Sucking Cock and coont, Finger My Ass, Play with my Puss, Three on a Dildo, Girls Who Crave Cock, Girls Who Crave coont, Men Alone Two-The K.Y. Connection, Pink Pussy Lips, and All Holes Filled with Hard Cock. Oh, and... What was the name of that movie?

22 Dec 2012 10:00 PM
Reply
SuperDuper28     

calbert: [c438342.r42.cf2.rackcdn.com image 400x300]

/obscure?


Did you just ask if a reference to the movie Clerks was obscure?

22 Dec 2012 10:00 PM
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thisisyourbrainonFark     

SuperDuper28: calbert: [c438342.r42.cf2.rackcdn.com image 400x300]

/obscure?

Did you just ask if a reference to the movie Clerks was obscure?


Did you just respond?

/you're not allowed to rent here anymore!
//yeaaaahhh!!

22 Dec 2012 10:06 PM
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dopekitty74     
Shoe-polish smelling motherfukers

22 Dec 2012 10:24 PM
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i upped my meds-up yours     
3.bp.blogspot.com

22 Dec 2012 11:21 PM
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Bob The Nob     
That's beautiful, man.

22 Dec 2012 11:36 PM
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ArkAngel    [TotalFark]  

sore_bluto: I need one each of the following tapes: Whisper in the Wind, To Each His Own, Put it Where It Doesn't Belong, My Pipes Need Cleaning, All Tit-farking, Volume Eight, I Need Your Cock, Ass-Worshipping Rim- Jobbers, My coont and Eight Shafts, Cum Clean, Cum-Gargling Naked Sluts, Cum Buns Three, Cumming in a Sock, Cum on Eileen, Huge Black Cocks with Pearly White Cum, Slam It Up My Too-Loose Ass, Ass Blasters in Outer Space, Blowjobs by Betsy, Sucking Cock and coont, Finger My Ass, Play with my Puss, Three on a Dildo, Girls Who Crave Cock, Girls Who Crave coont, Men Alone Two-The K.Y. Connection, Pink Pussy Lips, and All Holes Filled with Hard Cock. Oh, and... What was the name of that movie?


Who eats cock?

23 Dec 2012 01:07 AM
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Mr. Shabooboo     
Ooooo Navy Seals..

23 Dec 2012 01:32 AM
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NephilimNexus     
#1) Clerk terminated for screwing up The System.

#2) Winner throws away half his winnings to The Banks by accepting Lump Sum.

#3) Winner sticks other half up his nose, is broke within three years.

23 Dec 2012 06:07 AM
Reply
OregonVet    [TotalFark]  

sore_bluto: I need one each of the following tapes: Whisper in the Wind, To Each His Own, Put it Where It Doesn't Belong, My Pipes Need Cleaning, All Tit-farking, Volume Eight, I Need Your Cock, Ass-Worshipping Rim- Jobbers, My coont and Eight Shafts, Cum Clean, Cum-Gargling Naked Sluts, Cum Buns Three, Cumming in a Sock, Cum on Eileen, Huge Black Cocks with Pearly White Cum, Slam It Up My Too-Loose Ass, Ass Blasters in Outer Space, Blowjobs by Betsy, Sucking Cock and coont, Finger My Ass, Play with my Puss, Three on a Dildo, Girls Who Crave Cock, Girls Who Crave coont, Men Alone Two-The K.Y. Connection, Pink Pussy Lips, and All Holes Filled with Hard Cock. Oh, and... What was the name of that movie?


I couldn't read that without hearing Randal's voice.

23 Dec 2012 07:43 AM
Reply
OregonVet    [TotalFark]  

23 Dec 2012 07:45 AM
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abhorrent1     
$2.1 million Tri State Megabucks jackpot. The Bennetts chose the one-time cash option of $1.3 million, which comes to a little under $1 million after taxes

Probably should have went with the annuity.

23 Dec 2012 07:53 AM
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