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   Canada has a secret Maple Syrup cartel

25 Dec 2012 01:24 PM   |   6948 clicks   |   Time
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St_Francis_P     
A very badly kept secret.

25 Dec 2012 09:46 AM
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Argh Not Again     
Obvious tag kidnapped, beheaded, and dumped in Nunavut.

25 Dec 2012 10:15 AM
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Makh    [TotalFark]  
"strategic maple syrup reserve"

This actually exists?  Why does sugar syrup need so much strategic management?

upload.wikimedia.org

Oh.

25 Dec 2012 10:32 AM
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St_Francis_P     

Makh: "strategic maple syrup reserve"

This actually exists?  Why does sugar syrup need so much strategic management?

[upload.wikimedia.org image 400x316]

Oh.


It's a sticky subject.

25 Dec 2012 10:41 AM
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PhiloeBedoe    [TotalFark]  
i1079.photobucket.com
Arise, Sir Upp of Maple...

25 Dec 2012 12:02 PM
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quatchi     
So since 1989, the FPAQ has modulated supply to keep prices stable, setting aside maple syrup in good years and releasing it in bad ones.

We are such a practical people it's almost embarrassing.

/The sap must flow.
//Who controls the syrup, controls the universe.
///Merry Christmas/Festivus/Chanakah/Eid, etc to all and sundry even the trolls.

25 Dec 2012 12:23 PM
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AKTurkey     
Classic Canada

25 Dec 2012 01:27 PM
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BokerBill     
$3/gal maple syrup.
Where do I go to get this?

25 Dec 2012 01:28 PM
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rockforever     
I guess the obvious tag has the day off or something.

25 Dec 2012 01:28 PM
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duffblue     
Are Canadians really that crazy about maple syrup? What are you going to do with $30 million in maple syrup? Why would you even bother stealing it?

25 Dec 2012 01:33 PM
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maggoo     
No sappy tag? For shame.

25 Dec 2012 01:33 PM
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lasercannon     
"some 6 million gallons of maple syrup - about $18 million worth" That works out to 3 dollars a gallon, I've been to Costco and it is selling for 13 dollars for a a quart (I think), it is a lot more expensive every other store. WTF Canada?

25 Dec 2012 01:34 PM
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Utard_Free     
Cartel, huh? Say ello to mah little sticky friend! Oh wait, it's Quebec, so...Dites bonjour à mon ami collant!

25 Dec 2012 01:34 PM
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Oldiron_79     
Someone inform the Royal Canadian Kilted Yaksmen

25 Dec 2012 01:35 PM
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Fabric_Man     

lasercannon: "some 6 million gallons of maple syrup - about $18 million worth" That works out to 3 dollars a gallon, I've been to Costco and it is selling for 13 dollars for a a quart (I think), it is a lot more expensive every other store. WTF Canada?


It's like the opposite of cop math

25 Dec 2012 01:38 PM
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mc_madness     
Canadians amuse me. They're such a simple, inbred people.

Very quaint.

25 Dec 2012 01:39 PM
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Amper     
A supply management system like the one in Quebec will keep prices stable no matter what supply is like. But when Canada isn't producing as much maple syrup, the cartel kept prices lower than would otherwise be the case.

Oh, Canada - Even your capitalism is socialist.

25 Dec 2012 01:43 PM
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Benni K Rok     
The cartel keeps prices on Maple Syrup down.

That's pretty sweet.

25 Dec 2012 01:46 PM
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SkittleBrau     
Bought some Tap 357 last week and I must say that is some of the best tasting Canadian maple syrup I have ever had. Poured some on my pancakes - really good. Kind of runny for maple syrup but the pancakes soaked it right up. Funny thing... I had the hardest time standing up, walking, operating heavy machinery and even talking afterwards.

25 Dec 2012 01:46 PM
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dweigert    [TotalFark]  
Maple Mead for the win!!

/Dendarii Mountain

25 Dec 2012 01:50 PM
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Ficoce     

SkittleBrau: Bought some Tap 357 last week and I must say that is some of the best tasting Canadian maple syrup I have ever had. Poured some on my pancakes - really good. Kind of runny for maple syrup but the pancakes soaked it right up. .


That's what real syrup is like. We like it thicker here in the US, so we use corn syrup with natural and artificial flavorings. The corn cartel is stronger than the maple cartel. BTW, what happened to the three guys that stole from the maple cartel? TFA kind of flossed over that and started going on about good years and bad.

25 Dec 2012 02:00 PM
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dryknife     
Can't they frack for more sap?

25 Dec 2012 02:09 PM
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wildlifer     
Shhh.. Discovery will turn it into a show: Canadian Mafia:
Crime boss Pierre will speak in a taunting hillbilly French, and end each sentence with, eh?

Molson will be the sponsor.

25 Dec 2012 02:12 PM
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aerojockey    [TotalFark]  

Ficoce: SkittleBrau: Bought some Tap 357 last week and I must say that is some of the best tasting Canadian maple syrup I have ever had. Poured some on my pancakes - really good. Kind of runny for maple syrup but the pancakes soaked it right up. .

That's what real syrup is like. We like it thicker here in the US, so we use corn syrup with natural and artificial flavorings. The corn cartel is stronger than the maple cartel. BTW, what happened to the three guys that stole from the maple cartel? TFA kind of flossed over that and started going on about good years and bad.


What did the "whoosh" sound like when you typed that?

25 Dec 2012 02:18 PM
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CokeBear     
This is one of those times when the Sappy tag is actually appropriate. Mods, can you please fix?

25 Dec 2012 02:19 PM
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Ficoce     
It would be a very polite crime show with absolutely no CGI.

This week: Pierre doesn't toss his trash or push his chair in at the local Timmy's - Police respond with a stern, "Please don't do that." Up next, after Corner Gas.

25 Dec 2012 02:23 PM
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Ficoce     

aerojockey: Ficoce: SkittleBrau: Bought some Tap 357 last week and I must say that is some of the best tasting Canadian maple syrup I have ever had. Poured some on my pancakes - really good. Kind of runny for maple syrup but the pancakes soaked it right up. .

That's what real syrup is like. We like it thicker here in the US, so we use corn syrup with natural and artificial flavorings. The corn cartel is stronger than the maple cartel. BTW, what happened to the three guys that stole from the maple cartel? TFA kind of flossed over that and started going on about good years and bad.

What did the "whoosh" sound like when you typed that?


It was sweet.

25 Dec 2012 02:28 PM
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SkittleBrau     

Ficoce: aerojockey: Ficoce: SkittleBrau: Bought some Tap 357 last week and I must say that is some of the best tasting Canadian maple syrup I have ever had. Poured some on my pancakes - really good. Kind of runny for maple syrup but the pancakes soaked it right up. .

That's what real syrup is like. We like it thicker here in the US, so we use corn syrup with natural and artificial flavorings. The corn cartel is stronger than the maple cartel. BTW, what happened to the three guys that stole from the maple cartel? TFA kind of flossed over that and started going on about good years and bad.

What did the "whoosh" sound like when you typed that?

It was sweet.


Hell, I wasn't even trying to troll anybody but got one anyways, ehh??

25 Dec 2012 02:33 PM
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GoodScout     
Shhhh. Don't tip them to Vermont's plan to invade.

25 Dec 2012 02:48 PM
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morg     
The truth is that maple syrup isn't as rare as it was initially believed. When the FPAQ found out they bought up all maple sources in order to keep the price artificially inflated. What you people don't realize is that your "precious" maple syrup is made possible with the blood of trees.

25 Dec 2012 02:57 PM
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ElBarto79     
some 6 million gallons of maple syrup - about $18 million worth - was stolen from the "strategic maple syrup reserve"

What I wanna know is where the hell can you buy maple syrup for 3 dollars a gallon. Real maple syrup, not that corn syrup and food coloring aunt jemima crap.

25 Dec 2012 03:19 PM
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Shtetl G     
As long as there will be maple cartels there will be maple mobsters. Its a story as old as time, Pure uncut Canadian Maple is a true joy. Unfortunately, most of the 18 millions gallons of stolen maple syrup is destined to be cut with grade D corn runoff swill. The worst of the worst. Barely industrial grade corn syrup. That's how you make a real profit slanging maple. Mark my words, every Waffle House and Ihop from Kalamazoo to Oshkosh already has that cut syrup. You probably ate some this weekend. Sad, but that's the maple game.

25 Dec 2012 03:20 PM
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aerojockey    [TotalFark]  
IIRC, they recovered about 2/3 of the stolen syrup.

25 Dec 2012 03:25 PM
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quatchi     
maggoo: No sappy tag? For shame.

25 Dec 2012 03:31 PM
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Shtetl G     

aerojockey: IIRC, they recovered about 2/3 of the stolen syrup.


That's not how works in my imaginary maple game. I'm already working on a screen play. Think the French Connection meets Superfly with a dash of The Wire. One last Maple score to get out the game and leave the mean streets of Quebec. Based on a true story too.

25 Dec 2012 03:35 PM
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Running a-puck     
Yeah, but when the Glatun come you know who is going to be first against the wall

/obscure?

25 Dec 2012 03:49 PM
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demaL-demaL-yeH    [TotalFark]  

Argh Not Again: Obvious tag kidnapped, beheaded, and dumped in Nunavut.

Bob. FTFY

25 Dec 2012 04:16 PM
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zerkalo     
Oh, Canada, even your criminal enterprises are adorable!

Let's talk about the Italian olive oil concerns

25 Dec 2012 04:33 PM
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katfairy     
$3/gallon? Pikers.

/Rural Mainer with sugar house literally a hundred feet down the road
//lets them tap our maples
///free syrup for life
////smug

25 Dec 2012 05:01 PM
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MBooda     
Unavailable for comment
4.bp.blogspot.com
/rowsdower

25 Dec 2012 05:35 PM
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demaL-demaL-yeH    [TotalFark]  

katfairy: ///free syrup for life
////smug


Don't be. I get my maple surple from my brother-in-law's brother. (Grade A light amber.)

25 Dec 2012 05:45 PM
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Persnickety     

BokerBill: $3/gal maple syrup.
Where do I go to get this?


Sounds great. Probably comes in bags though.

25 Dec 2012 05:57 PM
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richjob     

Running a-puck: Yeah, but when the Glatun come you know who is going to be first against the wall

/obscure?


Alas, no. It's the Revenuers you have to be concerned with.

25 Dec 2012 06:13 PM
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demaL-demaL-yeH    [TotalFark]  

richjob: Running a-puck: Yeah, but when the Glatun come you know who is going to be first against the wall

/obscure?

Alas, no. It's the Revenuers you have to be concerned with.


People who don't treat skin rashes?

25 Dec 2012 06:45 PM
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Gyrfalcon     

Amper: A supply management system like the one in Quebec will keep prices stable no matter what supply is like. But when Canada isn't producing as much maple syrup, the cartel kept prices lower than would otherwise be the case.

Oh, Canada - Even your capitalism is socialist.


Ba-dum-bump.

25 Dec 2012 08:04 PM
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bahknee     
thebeersessions.com
~$8.99 at the the grocery store.

25 Dec 2012 08:15 PM
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Suckmaster Burstingfoam     

duffblue: Are Canadians really that crazy about maple syrup? What are you going to do with $30 million in maple syrup? Why would you even bother stealing it?


You yanks hoard guns and silver rounds and MREs and coupons and stuff.

We Canadians hoard maple syrup.

Who looks more foolish?

25 Dec 2012 10:56 PM
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Suckmaster Burstingfoam     

Utard_Free: Cartel, huh? Say ello to mah little sticky friend! Oh wait, it's Quebec, so...Dites bonjour à mon ami collant!


"They say good day to my male friend the colander"?

25 Dec 2012 10:58 PM
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my herniated disc     
who cares.

if its not maple butter I'm not interested

25 Dec 2012 11:50 PM
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Gyrfalcon     

Suckmaster Burstingfoam: duffblue: Are Canadians really that crazy about maple syrup? What are you going to do with $30 million in maple syrup? Why would you even bother stealing it?

You yanks hoard guns and silver rounds and MREs and coupons and stuff.

We Canadians hoard maple syrup.

Who looks more foolish?


You still do, but you'll have more to eat after the apocalypse.

26 Dec 2012 01:37 AM
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